I wonder why alot of people prefer to spend the money they often don’t have on parties that last only a few hours. In my family, i have been termed the black sheep, because i do not subscribe to a few things they often do.
It upsets me to see poor extended family member who are barely getting by with life spend on aso-ebi and the things to buy as gift. I do not consider these the primary reason why parties should be held. I believe the aso-ebi thing has been abused. I hear it’s a smart way of raising money for a party, and food. Do the maths, u would see u have just taken time to entertain your self, with a new cloth, travel and food eaten.
It is important to note that the money spent on these parties are sometimes enough to prosper them in a venture.
Away from that , another thing that upsets me is the parties end up stressing the celebrant and family , as they are often involved in the cooking, carring of chairs , arrainging the venue, packing up and all that which i feel is not worth it. Why hold a party u don’t get to enjoy? I don’t see why i should spend time,, money and energy into a party just to entertain others. I believe this is why we have partyplanners, to help with all the tiny details and organization.
For these reasons and more. When my time comes to marry or have a cause to celebrate. Itis going to be strictly low key. I have set a goal for myself to be the 1st member of the family who would have a party without aso-ebi, and also have a party planner.

Family would say i am weird, but if i am too scared to be different then i would make no difference.
What’s your take? Are parties not being abused?

A lot of people hold parties without aso-ebi and it doesn't stop the party from being a success so you won't be the first to choose not to want it.
Peolple can hold their parties however they choose and no one is forced to buy aso-ebi or will u be bounced for not wearing one.
You seem to have issues with everything and i as such really dont get what you are complaining about per se..
Is it the food,the trouble that goes into organising parties,aso-ebi or partying itself that's your worry?Is it the parties u think are being abused or the aso-ebi?
How are they being abused?
Na u give them money to buy the aso-ebi or what?

It is Over rated. A lot of people do it to fill their own purse. I can remember when I got married, I refused to take aso ebi and my sister went crazy. ℓ☺ℓ.
All I did was pick colour code. I do not like stressing myself at all. The most annoying thing is when the celebrant decides to pick something really expensive. Its as if they don't even think of others.
A friend of mine picked aso ebi for his wedding and it was expensive. He kept calling me to come and buy. Na by force I didn't Ooº°˚ ˚°ºoo
If u have to buy every aso ebi that ur friends bring that's a straight way to bankruptcy.
People should learn to say NO especially our men. My husband will agree to buy an aso ebi that he cannot even wear as long as u force him.

I completely agree wiv d OP's view. Slimyem, abeg shift jare, seems lyk u re one of d 'aso-ebi freaks'.
Please, enjoy this dialogue I drafted for the purpose of this thread:

IYA DELE: ah ah, se ko si? Hope no problem?

DELE: Rara ma. Em, it was headmaster that flogged me at skul today for not paying up school fees. He threatened us not to come to skul tomorrow except we come with it.

IYA DELE: Aww, pele omo mi. Sorry, ehn? That your headmaster is wicked oo. Doesn't he know how hard it is to get 10000 naira in this present Nigerian economy? Sorry my dear. There is no harm in you staying at home for a while. You can even use that time to rest till your father gets money. Okay? (Dele nods quickly).

IYA DELE: you can even stroll with me to farm tomorrow, okay? That's how you become a very strong man.(Dele nods.)

******NEXT DAY*******

IYA KUNLE: Ah, Iya Dele, e kasan.

IYA DELE: E kasan ma, e n le. A ma rii yin. Hope no problem?

IYA KUNLE: no problem oo. Didn't you hear that my mother died days ago?

IYA DELE: Aww...I'm so sorry. E pele. Iya agba ti ku...

IYA KUNLE: She don die be that oh.Lyf is really short. (Brings out some yards of 'ankara') Ehn...Iya Dele, this is the material we picked for the occasion.

IYA DELE: Ehn-ehn...but you've not told me the date for the burial and...

IYA KUNLEInterrupts) I have to be sure you're interested in our aso-ebi before inviting you.

IYA DELE: Of course I am...

IYA KUNLE: (smiles broadly) That's very gud. So, do you have the money now? This material in my hand shud be enof for u nd ur husband. That's 10000 naira.

IYA DELE: right now? (Iya Kunle quickly nods). Ah, o ga oo...

IYA KUNLE: And that's what everybody wud be wearing oh, Mummy Dele. 'To-match' ni lojo yen o.

IYA DELE: ah, I will buy naa. I think I have some money I've been saving inside my room. Wait for me, let me get the money. My husband and I must attend this one.

sholay2011: I completely agree wiv d OP's view. Slimyem, abeg shift jare, seems lyk u re one of d 'aso-ebi freaks'.
Please, enjoy this dialogue I drafted for the purpose of this thread:

I'm not.I just know that nobody dips their hand into your pocket to make you buy an aso-ebi you don't want to.You can say NO if you don't like the idea so what's the issue?

sholay2011: I completely agree wiv d OP's view. Slimyem, abeg shift jare, seems lyk u re one of d 'aso-ebi freaks'.
Please, enjoy this dialogue I drafted for the purpose of this thread:

IYA DELE: ah ah, se ko si? Hope no problem?

DELE: Rara ma. Em, it was headmaster that flogged me at skul today for not paying up school fees. He threatened us not to come to skul tomorrow except we come with it.

IYA DELE: Aww, pele omo mi. Sorry, ehn? That your headmaster is wicked oo. Doesn't he know how hard it is to get 10000 naira in this present Nigerian economy? Sorry my dear. There is no harm in you staying at home for a while. You can even use that time to rest till your father gets money. Okay? (Dele nods quickly).

IYA DELE: you can even stroll with me to farm tomorrow, okay? That's how you become a very strong man.(Dele nods.)

******NEXT DAY*******

IYA KUNLE: Ah, Iya Dele, e kasan.

IYA DELE: E kasan ma, e n le. A ma rii yin. Hope no problem?

IYA KUNLE: no problem oo. Didn't you hear that my mother died days ago?

IYA DELE: Aww...I'm so sorry. E pele. Iya agba ti ku...

IYA KUNLE: She don die be that oh.Lyf is really short. (Brings out some yards of 'ankara') Ehn...Iya Dele, this is the material we picked for the occasion.

IYA DELE: Ehn-ehn...but you've not told me the date for the burial and...

IYA KUNLEInterrupts) I have to be sure you're interested in our aso-ebi before inviting you.

IYA DELE: Of course I am...

IYA KUNLE: (smiles broadly) That's very gud. So, do you have the money now? This material in my hand shud be enof for u nd ur husband. That's 10000 naira.

IYA DELE: right now? (Iya Kunle quickly nods). Ah, o ga oo...

IYA KUNLE: And that's what everybody wud be wearing oh, Mummy Dele. 'To-match' ni lojo yen o.

IYA DELE: ah, I will buy naa. I think I have some money I've been saving inside my room. Wait for me, let me get the money. My husband and I must attend this one.

U r a good writer,u r wanted by nollywood!
@op,its really true that pple go tooooo far for things like this. I've seen couple in one room organise one big party that kept my mouth wide open!d lady sells recharge cards and hair pdts in front of her compd while d hubby, I don't know.d ocasion was 8 days namin ceremony of their 1st child. Still wonderin how they got d money,though she is hardworking. So I think it makes pple feel good and unwine. also it gives sense of belongin 2.

I am a mixture of a lagos island and ijebu parent and those two families looovee aso ebi.no matter how much it is,they will buy it.its just what they love and its what makes us happy.we rally around each other for that,so i think its a matter of where your interest and priorities lies and the kinds of things your parents like or the environment you were brought up in however i dont subscribe to borrowing money for aso ebi especially when you dont have the money,buying aso ebi on credit etc.infact if i dont have money as of that time when they bring aso ebi,i prefer not to go for that wedding but send a text wishing the couple a happy married life

Excellent imagery... but err.. were you kunke in the story when you were growing up
77 Likes!!

sholay2011: I completely agree wiv d OP's view. Slimyem, abeg shift jare, seems lyk u re one of d 'aso-ebi freaks'.
Please, enjoy this dialogue I drafted for the purpose of this thread:

IYA DELE: ah ah, se ko si? Hope no problem?

DELE: Rara ma. Em, it was headmaster that flogged me at skul today for not paying up school fees. He threatened us not to come to skul tomorrow except we come with it.

IYA DELE: Aww, pele omo mi. Sorry, ehn? That your headmaster is wicked oo. Doesn't he know how hard it is to get 10000 naira in this present Nigerian economy? Sorry my dear. There is no harm in you staying at home for a while. You can even use that time to rest till your father gets money. Okay? (Dele nods quickly).

IYA DELE: you can even stroll with me to farm tomorrow, okay? That's how you become a very strong man.(Dele nods.)

******NEXT DAY*******

IYA KUNLE: Ah, Iya Dele, e kasan.

IYA DELE: E kasan ma, e n le. A ma rii yin. Hope no problem?

IYA KUNLE: no problem oo. Didn't you hear that my mother died days ago?

IYA DELE: Aww...I'm so sorry. E pele. Iya agba ti ku...

IYA KUNLE: She don die be that oh.Lyf is really short. (Brings out some yards of 'ankara') Ehn...Iya Dele, this is the material we picked for the occasion.

IYA DELE: Ehn-ehn...but you've not told me the date for the burial and...

IYA KUNLEInterrupts) I have to be sure you're interested in our aso-ebi before inviting you.

IYA DELE: Of course I am...

IYA KUNLE: (smiles broadly) That's very gud. So, do you have the money now? This material in my hand shud be enof for u nd ur husband. That's 10000 naira.

IYA DELE: right now? (Iya Kunle quickly nods). Ah, o ga oo...

IYA KUNLE: And that's what everybody wud be wearing oh, Mummy Dele. 'To-match' ni lojo yen o.

IYA DELE: ah, I will buy naa. I think I have some money I've been saving inside my room. Wait for me, let me get the money. My husband and I must attend this one.

biolabee: Excellent imagery... but err.. were you kunke in the story when you were growing up
77 Likes!!

hahahha aunty yemisi (mumys sister is guilty of this o.its like she is even the one you are talking about.she can use her life savings to buy aso ebi,the difference is that shes a single mom and she will tell her son to go and hustle with the excuse that iya waye tie,omo naa de waye tie.if i (my aunty) was not alive,wont you read.afterall there are many people of your age without a father and mother,but they are sponsoring themselves to sit for waec.to her that aso ebi is more important than her son's education.if the boy comes to report her to me (because his mother and i are close and i talk to her about investing in her son's education she will say) aburo mi jo fimile,tiobale fagburu bi awon egbe e,kojokosile men.moti try ibiti iya tin try fun omo,but shori party yi,malo,made fi owo mi yen ra aso ebi yi se.oripe o fine (stands up to show mi while eulogizing herself in yoruba ) and all i just do is chuckle and shake my head.mani o fine pa.and she will be like joor aburo mi mofe ko shey favour fun mi,part kan wa ni oshodi,modefekajo lo,wabami we gele timawo,modefekodabi ti iya rainbow.eventually,i will codedly give money to her son to pay for his waec.thank God he is in the university.if everyone of us decided to ignore that promising young boy,my aunty will destroy his life with her carefree attitude and her obsession with show off,aso ebis and parties

kulyie: hahahha aunty yemisi (mumys sister is guilty of this o.its like she is even the one you are talking about.she can use her life savings to buy aso ebi,the difference is that shes a single mom and she will tell her son to go and hustle with the excuse that iya waye tie,omo naa de waye tie.if i (my aunty) was not alive,wont you read.afterall there are many people of your age without a father and mother,but they are sponsoring themselves to sit for waec.to her that aso ebi is more important than her son's education.if the boy comes to report her to me (because his mother and i are close and i talk to her about investing in her son's education she will say) aburo mi jo fimile,tiobale fagburu bi awon egbe e,kojokosile men.moti try ibiti iya tin try fun omo,but shori party yi,malo,made fi owo mi yen ra aso ebi yi se.oripe o fine (stands up to show mi while eulogizing herself in yoruba ) and all i just do is chuckle and shake my head.mani o fine pa.and she will be like joor aburo mi mofe ko shey favour fun mi,part kan wa ni oshodi,modefekajo lo,wabami we gele timawo,modefekodabi ti iya rainbow.eventually,i will codedly give money to her son to pay for his waec.thank God he is in the university.if everyone of us decided to ignore that promising young boy,my aunty will destroy his life with her carefree attitude and her obsession with show off,aso ebis and parties

aunty yii badt gan... owambe tinz.. party ni oshodi oke ti won ti ju aya bii ronke oshodi..

nothing spoil..

Hope the boy makes it wella through school lol....

biolabee:

aunty yii badt gan... owambe tinz.. party ni oshodi oke ti won ti ju aya bii ronke oshodi..

nothing spoil..

Hope the boy makes it wella through school lol....

lmao i hope so too o. At least he just got admission this year and everyone in the family contributes money to pay for his tuition fee,pocket money and miscellenous.lol,that my aunty is just something else.all she is concerned about is the latest gold and shoe in town to the owanmbe.moreover i am happy that he is the only child and he is a boy,if not,if it was a girl,that girl will be frolicking with men for money and she wont even know till she is pregnant.she no dey take eye see ankara,voile lace,french lace etc.once they bring it to her house,she is happy plus buying bra that will pack all her breast up,fixing eye lashes and doing the latest brazillian hair.up till now it still amazes me how she doesnt feel uncomfortable leaving her son to fate

biolabee: Excellent imagery... but err.. were you kunke in the story when you were growing up
77 Likes!!

Lol. I am not Kunle oo...and though, my mother is an 'aso-ebi freak', she wud definitely not do it at the xpense of her children. It's fiction. Tnx for d comment.

kulyie: lmao i hope so too o. At least he just got admission this year and everyone in the family contributes money to pay for his tuition fee,pocket money and miscellenous.lol,that my aunty is just something else.all she is concerned about is the latest gold and shoe in town to the owanmbe.moreover i am happy that he is the only child and he is a boy,if not,if it was a girl,that girl will be frolicking with men for money and she wont even know till she is pregnant.she no dey take eye see ankara,voile lace,french lace etc.once they bring it to her house,she is happy plus buying bra that will pack all her breast up,fixing eye lashes and doing the latest brazillian hair.up till now it still amazes me how she doesnt feel uncomfortable leaving her son to fate

atoo...May God help us

nice one sholay

kulyie: lmao i hope so too o. At least he just got admission this year and everyone in the family contributes money to pay for his tuition fee,pocket money and miscellenous.lol,that my aunty is just something else.all she is concerned about is the latest gold and shoe in town to the owanmbe.moreover i am happy that he is the only child and he is a boy,if not,if it was a girl,that girl will be frolicking with men for money and she wont even know till she is pregnant.she ;o dey take eye see ankara,voile lace,french lace etc.once they bring it to her house,she is happy plus buying bra that will pack all her breast up,fixing eye lashes and doing the latest brazillian hair.up till now it still amazes me how she doesnt feel uncomfortable leaving her son to fate

Apt description of ALOT of my isale eko kinswomen .As much as aso-ebi makes occassions look colorful ,its beginning to get ridiculous.My sister says mums friends kids package sometimes reaches up to 200k for wedding and engagement.For what naa Cloth that you might never wear again.My mum has a top to down wardrobe filled with just gele and aso oke,its ridiculous.She has like 3or4 of every shade of every colour,mint green,army green,olive green,leavr green,fuschia pink,baby pink,tomato red bla bla.In sagoe,hayes,silk after they will say the sagoe is no longer in vogue.

There was a year i swear i spent close to 300k while still in Naija on aso ebi if you count the sewing costs as well.Alot of my friends and my mums friends daughter got married.Bloody waste of money i tell ya.For my wedding i had aso ebi but bought for 20 people as soon as it finished i told people just wear orange.My mum was so vexed but we fought all the time during the wedding prep anyway.

The one i hate is when there is lower and higher package.Why not just go for the cheaper one for everyone and let people accesorize as they deem fit?Its just showing off IMO.

Not yet married but ℓ̊ already have almost 2 box full of unsewed aso ebi..... †ђξ cost of sewing some sef pass the aso ebi money apart from accessories and toomatch shoe and bag.... Sumtyms wn dey bring d aso ebi and ℓ̊ dnt buy cos ℓ̊ knw for sure ℓ̊ won't attend d event, my mum wl say 'ℓ̊ wl see who wl buy your own wn d tym cums'....evn wn ℓ̊ feel the money for d cloth is rdiculous, ℓ̊ jst buy it lyk dt.....
May God help us.....#sigh#

Thank God for my family. Mum was and is still not an aso ebi fan. Her friends then got tired Of bringing it to the house. She would always say...."if it is compulsory to wear aso ebi, don't invite me".......some of her coward friends started speaking up too after she started.

Why kill yourself when you know you can't afford it??