Hello Nairalanders,your advice is needed here!

This my story,in 2003 i sent my mom huge amount of money to buy me 4 plots of land,which she did but bought it on her name and i have also sent her more money to fence the land and build a bedroom flat for a security guard to watch the land since we found out that some people were draging the land with us.

the case was so serious that it went to court but at the end my mom won the case,i know that she did try alot handling a complicated land and taking care of it for almost 6 yrs now but i have sent her money for design and also foundation for the house and i discoverd when i went home that she never did start any foundation etc and she kept asking for money all the time not to mention that i use to pay her 500 euros monthly for her up keep and she always complain that its not enough,

so now i decided to travel home last month to see my family and as well see if i can finish the building etc but i never told anyone i was coming home
so when i arrived home,they were all surprised of course and after 1 week during my stay,i ask my mom to show me the documents for the land cos she never even mention anything about docs to me apart from showing me the land and when i went there i didnt like the area and i decided i was going to sell it and use the money to buy land in another area.

Then i ask my mom about the documents it was a fight as in she didnt want to show it to me but i insisted and when she brought it and i discovered that her name was still in the documents ,when we both agreed a year ago that she should change it back to my name when i discovered she bought it with her name and she did tell me that she has changed it back to my name and even sent me the land documents with my name on it,which was fake but just to make me beleive she has changed to back to my name ,so i got soooo pissed that she lied to me and i told her that we should go and change it back to my name and she refused that she wont do it and also refused giving me the documents.

And i also find out that she has been planning to sell the land or take a loan with it and build a 1 storey building in her own plot.

How can my own mother do this to me, you all abroad know how difficult this are and after working so hard and your own family cheat on u like this what would you do cos as for me i am done with her

i even bought a car worth more than 2m and still gave her additional 2m and she didnt appreciate anything i did for her instead she wanted me to give her all the $ ,i came home with and also the money i gave to my elder sister for a uk visa,my younger sister for a resturant,the one in uniport etc

she just wanted everything to herself and not to mention that she was unhappy almost all day that i was there and argue with my sisters everyday on little things .
with anger i moved to a hotel and left from there without telling any of my family memember until i arrived here.

not to mention that someone also tried setting me up at the airport with the police so that i dont go back but God has been by my side and my hands are clean,so i went pass it.

so my question is if your in this kind of suitaion what will u do,avoid your family ,never go back home etc your advice is needed cos im so confused and betrayed right now.

i for to tell you guys that ,she even told me that she is not happy that i took my younger sister to europe ,how can a mother not wish her kids good eh?

let ur advices keep coming
Evept

dude or dudess, am sorry u have a bad mother, but u sef how can u dull urself all these years and let ur money go down the drains, ur lucky she didnt go to babalawo to wash ur memory down ther drains, i advice you to get ur land back from her, and move on.
At least you should av sent someone else to be checking up on the land ur mom took from you.
Guy no dulling next time

\no dulling.

@ehie007

thanks for your advice,i did tell her before i left that she should sell it and send the money to my account

secondly,i trusted her ,so i didnt think sending someone to check on her would be necessary and she hardly let anyone know where she bought the land.
my sister don't tell me much about the land when i ask them .

i have decided that if she doesnt sell the land and transfer the money into my account then i will personally disown her as my mother pronto.

Are you sure that the woman in question is your biological mother?If the answer is yes,you have to be very cautious in every step you are going to take in getting back your land.This woman is devilish,how can she do such a thing to her own daughter.Please and please handle it with extra-ordinary care.

She will never get a dime from me again for LIFE !

Evept:

@ehie007

thanks for your advice,i did tell her before i left that she should sell it and send the money to my account

secondly,i trusted her ,so i didnt think sending someone to check on her would be necessary and she hardly let anyone know where she bought the land.
my sister don't tell me much about the land when i ask them .

i have decided that if she doesnt sell the land and transfer the money into my account then i will personally disown her as my mother pronto.

Good decision. She can do worse! You should just count yourself lucky that you are still sound and sane. Let go of the property to her and move on with your life. The question remains: is she your biological mother? All mothers want their children to be successful in life and will even sacrifice everything for their success but contrary is the case here. Pls move on. God dey your side.

Godalone:

Are you sure that the woman in question is your biological mother?

You took the words out of my mouth!!!

I'm speechless.

I thank you guys for your advice,it just hurts so much ,maybe i have to request for a DHA test lol to be really sure if she is my biological mom etc because there was a time i  even wanted to use another woman who cared more for me and loved me unconditionally as my mom and im still thinking of that,since i can't get that mortherly love from her .etc

well,im being very careful and avoiding her since i came back and i never told her im back so she will find out sooner or later.

and also discovered that whenever i discuss any good plans i wanted to do or achieve,it never works out ,not to mention that she is like this to almost all her kids and a 2face woman. my elder sister ran away from home for 2 years because of her attitude.

and no one want to stay under her roof because she makes them all unhappy.

Eh i almost forgot to mention that my immediate younger sister got married while i was in nigeria and my mom was the saddest people on earth that day,because she never wanted her to marry that man because he is a student and my sister already have 2 lovely kids with him,so i insisted that they should get married because they have always wanted to get married and my mom have been stopping it and trying to take my sister out of her matrimanial home . my sister is happy with this man and now happily married and im very happily for her. so let her go to hell with her bad attitude. everyone was dressing really nice for the wedding but my mom wore her uglyest cloth thats D.day and even told a lady at the reception that she is not happy for her daughters wedding and she refused coming out from the car to join us and eat and celebrate i had to beg her etc


And again last year december i lost my baby ,he was born too early and i had complications during pregnacy i told my mom about my conditions,i thought she was caring because she called me almost everyday while i was in the hospital but then she was telling my sisters in nigeria that i was lying about having a baby so that i wont be paying her ,her monthy up keep cos i did stop paying her for a while when i was pregnant as we needed the money more for my condition and she never shown me any emotionally support instead she told me that ppeople loose 5 pregnacies and the 6th or 7th one survives and was telling me that i should send her money, when we havent even buried my son and that same month i brought my younger sister here ,she was supposed to know that we have spent so much already but she didnt care etc.

i am very happy i went home to see things for myself because she tells me alot of lies on what is going on at home etc

well,thanks to u guys for your advice and please tell it keep coming.

i cant blv dat this woman in question is ur mum,

first things first, u need to be very prayerful and extremely careful, becos wen u try to cut her off she isnt goin to take that lightly wit u nd might resort to diabolical means*****dat is if she already hasnt started,
becos a mom been unhappy on her daughter wedding day needs to be checked becos dat day is every women dream come thru abi,

be very prayerful nd speak to ur pastor if u have one nd try nd cut her off for now though

@poster- I cant blv my eyes as i read ur post,but der's notin new under d heavens now,and of cos we watch films and some of des tins are true.Am sorry to say this but uve gat a bad mother dat doesnt have ur interest at heart at all. U can prayerfully collect ur properties from her bak (serious prayers ooo), but if you can fashi it,i will advise you to just leave it 4her since she is still ur blood and blood is thicker dan water,henceforth she stops knowing any thing abt u,pls just for parental blessings as God commands u can still keep sending anything u ave for her up keep it doesnt have to be up to what u were sending b4 anymore,afterall ure not d only child she has.

u could get a lawyer and let he/she knows abt d case of ur land and anything dat could be done abt it in d future.

pls cut of all forms of communication wt her.at least for now.For her not to be moved abt d loss of ur baby pisses me off (nawa ooo) she was much more concerned abt her monthly allowance. Wonders shall never end indeed

i think you let family sentiments over rule your reasoning,u know the saying fool me once shame on you,fool me twice shame on me, once u knew for a fact she was acting funny,you should have gotten a reputable lawyer and handed all your documents over to him/her,a lot of people are doing that these days,and there are project managers in nigeria who will build your property for you the way u want it,also its better to try n fing ou why ur mum s behaving that way as there might be somethn thats happened in the past

how is 500 euros/month not enough for her?

@lucabrasi ,i havent been home for over 6 yrs until last month and she is the one ,that bought the land for me while im here,with her name instead of mine and i have asked her to give me the documents for the land and she refused and also refused going together to change it ,so the re was no way i could collect the documents and hand it over to a lawyer etc.


@ fun4me2 ,
no she wont get a dime from me anymore,no matter how this suitation turns out ,you already know she doesnt care about me but money ,im avoiding her for now.


@TOH,
i myself cant believe why 500 euros monthly isnt enough for her but she wont be getting any now.

I'm sorry to hear about all of this. Just because she's your mother doesn't mean she would be all nice and perfect because some of us out there do have horrible parents just that we wont come out and say it. It horrible that she would do such to you. Hang in there.

This is Serious o.

Nairalanders CANNot help u

this is serious, but a great lesson to all women. we can see from all indication that the woman is devilish and not worthy of immitating
my dear i know how u are feeling, it is unfair, but i mayi advise u that u should put her into ur prayers seriously for to be delivered f
from the evil blinding her. again is ur dad alive? if no it is certain she killed him. but not withstanding be careful in dealing with her.
be diplomatic with her. because she can do and undo. in summary she is greedy and wicked.

This is a very simple case.

1. Are you the first born? If yes then you don’t need to bother yourself you would inherit back your property when she passes away.

2. How old is your mother? If she’s above sixty, then stop wasting your money in court just keep your fingers cross until the day she dies; from your post, you are the most successful child she has so once she joins her ancestors you would have no obstacle; so cheer up and focus on your lie over there one can’t live forever.

Can I tell you something a bit different from all that you have heard?
1. Forgive her. (I'm not saying you should continue the monthly allowance though).
2. Put all the loss behind you.
3. Focus on making more money to acquire another property.
4. Maintain a cautious distance but bear no grudge.
God will make all things work out for your own good.
God bless.