~I slammed my bedroom door & leaned against it!. . .was there no rest from this life? i stumbled on my bed & dropped on it,pressing my pillow around my ears to shut out the noise of my existence "oh God" i cried "let me sleep forever & never wake up!" with a deep sob,i tried to will myself to oblivion. . then welcomed the blackness that came over me:!

~Light surrounded me as i regained consciousness,i focused on it's source. . the figure of a man standing before a cross! "my child why do you want to come to me before i am ready to call you?" "Lord am sorry,it's just that i can't go on! you see how hard it is for me. . look at this burden on my back! i simply can't carry it anymore"
"But aven't i told u to cast your burden on me? because i care for you,my yoke is easy,my burden light"

~"I knew you'd say that but why does my burden ave to  be so heavy?"

"My child everyone in the world has a burden! perhaps you'd like to try a different one! "i can do that?" He pointed to several burdens lyin at his feet: "You may try any of these" All of them seemed to be of equal size & each was labelled with a name: "There's Joan's" i said Joan was married to a wealthy business man;she lived in a sprawling estate & dressed her three daughters in the prettiest designer clothes. . sometimes,she drove me to church in her cadillac when my car breaks down; "Let me try that one" How difficult could her burden be?! i thought!

~The lord removed my burdens & placed joan's on my shoulders I sank to my knees beneath it's weight!!! "Oh take it off quickly" i cried "what makes it so heavy?" "Look inside" I untied the straps & opened the top:inside was the figure of her mother-in-law & when i lifted it out, it began to talk "Joan you'll never be good enough for my son!he should never have married you! you are a terrible mother to my grandchildren" I quickly replaced the figure back & withdrew another!

~It was Joan's youngest daughter. . her head was bandaged from the surgery that has failed to cure her epilepsy! A thrid figure was Joan's brother-addicted to drugs,he's been convicted of killing a police officer! "I see why her burden is so heavy lord! "But she's always smiling & helpin others! i didn't realise. . . "Wud you like to try another?

~I tested several. . . Paula's felt heavy! she was raisin four small boys without a father! Dedra's did too! a childhood of sexual abuse & a marriage of emotional abuse! When i came to Ruth's, i didin't even try! I knew inside was a arthritis,old age,a demanding job & a beloved husband in a nursing home! "They'r all too HEAVY Lord give me back my own!

~As i lifted d familiar load once again,it seemed much lighter than the others!! "let's look inside " he said I turned away! "that's not a good idea! "there's a lot of junk in there" "Let me see" The gentle thunder of his voice compelled me! I opened my burden;he pulled out a brick! "Tell me about this" "Lord u know it's MONEY[/color][color=#990000]! I know we don't suffer like people in other countries or even the homeless but we ave no insurance! & when the kids are sick,i can't always take them to a doctor!they've never been to a dentist & am tired of dressin them in hand-me -downs!!

"My child i will supply all of your needs & your childrens! I ave given them healthy bodies & i'll teach them that expensive clothing doesn't make a person valueable in my sight!!"

Then he lifted out a figure of a small boy! "and this?" Andrew! i hung my head ashamed to call my son a burden! "But Lord he's hyperactive;he's not as quite as the other two;he makes me so tired! he's always gettin hurt & someone bound to think i abuse him! i yell at him all the time & someday,i may really hurt him!"

"My child,if you will TRUST me,i'll renew your stength! "If u allow me to FILL youu with my SPIRIT,i'll give you PATIENCE!"

~Then he took some pebbles from my burden: "Yes lord those are small but they are important! i hate my hair;it's thin;i can't make it look nice: i can't afford to go to the beauty shop: am over weight: i can't stay on a diet: i hate all my clothes! i hate the way i look!"

"My child people look at your outward apperance but i look at your HEART! by my SPIRIT, u can regain self control to loose weight! but your beauty should not come from outward apperance instead, it should come from your inner self. . The unfading beauty of a gentle & quiet spirit which is of great worth in my sight!"


~ My burden seemed lighter than before! "I guess i can handle it now" i said "There's more" He said" hand me that last brick!" "Oh you don't have to take that i can handle that" "Give it to me" Once again the voice compelled me! He reached out his hand & for the first time,i saw an ugly wound on his hand! "But lord this brick is so awful. . ." what happened to your hands?" "They are scarred!" No longer focused on my burden,i looked up for the first time into His face: on his brow,were ragged scars-as thu someone had pressed thorns into his flesh! "Lord" i whispered"what happened to you" His loving eyes reached into my soul! "My child hand me that brick! it belongs to me! i bought it" "How" "With MY BLOOD!" "But why Lord?" "Becoz i ave LOVED YOU WITH AN EVERLASTING LOVE" "Give me d brick" I placed my flithy brick into his wounded palm! It contained all the evil & dirt of my life!

~My sins,pride,my selfishness & my depression that constantly tormented me! He turned to the CROSS & hurled my brick into the pool of blood at it's base! it hardly made a ripple! "Now my child you must go back!

I'll BE WITH YOU ALWAYS! Wen  you are TROUBLED,CALL TO ME & I WILL HELP YOU! & SHOW YOU THINGS YOU WILL NEVER IMAGINE!!!

"yes lord i will call on u" i reached down to pick up my burden; "You may leave that here if you wish! see all these burdens?" "They are all the ones that have been left at my feet! Joan's,Paula's,Debra's,Ruth's & many more! when you leave your burdens with me,REMEMBER I CARRY THEM WITH YOU!!"

"MY YOKE IS EASY & MY BURDEN LIGHT" As i placed my burden with Him,the light began to fade yet i heard him whisper "I'LL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU!!!

A peace that passed my understanding flooded my soul! i stood tall & walked back into my life!

"COME UNTO ME ALL YOU WHO ARE WEARY AND BURDENED & I WILL GIVE YOU REST" TAKE MY YOKE UPON YOU AND LEARN FROM ME,FOR I AM GENTLE AND HUMBLE IN HEART,YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS FOR MY YOKE IS EASY AND MY BURDEN IS LIGHT matthew 11:28:30

COPYRIGHT 1993 LOUISE M. GOUGE

Thank you for posting Mohawkchic. I really needed to read that. God bless you.

~You're most welcome Nwaka77~

~May The Good Lord Bless you also! _amen