alutacontinua:


I'll try harder

5points: Legalize gay marriage and things like this wont happen.
We have millions of gays and lwz in nigeria, do u think they marry themselseves? No, they marry opposite sex just to fit it and consequently, dnt deliver in dea bedroom services.
You husband is GAY or IMPOTENT.
E NO DEY SHOW FOR FACE.
Dem plenty for church especially chior, be careful of them spirit koko no sex bfre marriage.

@ 5point: Are you gay? I bet this isn't the first time you've been asked this question. I noticed you were asked this same question on the thread you started where you asked people to rate you. Anyways, to each his/her own.

Dear OP, I sympathize with you. What you're going through is better imagined than experienced! There are many reasons that could make a man lose his sense of sensuality. And a lot of them have been mentioned on this thread. However, let me add that a man's desire for intimate pleasure diminishes with age. It's normal. Since you're 32 years old, I'm guessing your husband is between 34~37 years old. If he's in his late thirties, chances are his sexual hormones are depleting. Working-out together can help him burn fat and keep fit. They say "The fitter a man is, the more his appetite for sex." Regular intake of celery, raw oyster, bananas, almonds, eggs can help boost a man's sex hormones. And thing that is worth trying is going on a trip. A change of environment tend to increase our sense for adventures. If there's no time to go on a vacation then you should devise a means to make love-making with your hubby more spontaneous. Don't look towards the bed or bedroom before you two can get down. Strip nude in the living-room or anywhere other than your bedroom. Let him see the beauty underneath that gown or dress. If he's still reluctant to make a move you should hold his hand and gently lead it to your 'bermuda triangle'. I bet his manhood would be responsive, his hormones would be on fire and all cobwebs in his head would fall off!

chukxie:

@ 5point: Are you gay? I bet this isn't the first time you've been asked this question. I noticed you were asked this same question on the thread you started where you asked people to rate you. Anyways, to each his/her own.

Dear OP, I sympathize with you. What you're going through is better imagined than experienced! There are many reasons that could make a man lose his sense of sensuality. And a lot of them have been mentioned on this thread. However, let me add that a man's desire for intimate pleasure diminishes with age. It's normal. Since you're 32 years old, I'm guessing your husband is between 34~37 years old. If he's in his late thirties, chances are his sexual hormones are depleting. Working-out together can help him burn fat and keep fit. They say "The fitter a man is, the more his appetite for sex." Regular intake of celery, raw oyster, bananas, almonds, eggs can help boost a man's sex hormones. And thing that is worth trying is going on a trip. A change of environment tend to increase our sense for adventures. If there's no time to go on a vacation then you should devise a means to your almost nonexistent sex life with your hubby more spontaneous. Don't look towards the bed or bedroom before you two can get down. Strip nude in the living-room or anywhere other than your bedroom. Let him see the beauty underneath that gown or dress. If he's still reluctant to make a move you should hold his hand and gently lead it to your 'bermuda triangle'. I bet his manhood would be responsive, his hormones would be on fire and all cobwebs in his head would fall off!

Men's hormones depletes by 34-37 I beg to disagree!

Mazi_Omenuko:

When I started a thread on it, encouraging sex in a relationship, nairalanders wanted to tear my head off! Now this is where your happily ever after has landed you.
Endure it, afterall, its going to be a 75 years of misery, your reward is in heaven.

#did you say 2 times in a week? Damn! That's half of what you're supposed to enjoy PER DAY!

how can u b so insensitive and mean. Someonw presents a problem and u stick out ur tongue. When someone comes to u witha problem, if they dont go back feeling better, please send them back the way they came; not worse.

And yes, I too believe it is a wise choice to reserve sex for marriage. It is my opinion and I am entitled to it!

And just because u spend half of ur day having sex before marriage, it doesnt mean u too cnt hav intimacy problems in marriage (I dont wish it for u though)

@op i seriously think there are underlying issues that need to b addressed. its very important that u and ur hubby communicate freely...u might need counselling too.

funnyx:

Men's hormones depletes by 34-37 I beg to disagree!

"Since you're 32 years old, I'm guessing your husband is between 34~37 years old. If he's in his late thirties, chances are his intimate hormones are depleting." Chances are mean there's a probability/likelihood of sth existing.

Woged2005:

Sista sex is canal and there's nothing spiritual about it. .

There's something about u he doesn't like but doesn't know how to tell you out of respect for you. encourage him to be open and accept criticisms.


1.Be careful of soed when their brain process erotic thoughts. Unlike women, they're very visual (react to what they see). Improve in ur appearance. Make urself appealing to the eye. stock up ur wardrobe with sexy sleepwears.
2. Alcohol, stress, illness, arguments, naging, and turn-offs (ugly undies, lousy dressing, repulsive habits, etc) kill sexual apetite in men. Avoid any of that.
3. Avoid giving him heavy, food starchy food at night, he will sleep off. Lipton tea, a glass of wine can make a difference.
4.Find out what seduces him and turns him on. Talk about sex, talk naughty and play like kids, let ur bodies touch.
5.If symptom persists, see a doctor.
6.Please stay away from sharing this with friends, family, ur pastor, and church members otherwise ur marriage will be engulfed in fire and brimestone

All these for a marriage that is still so young? What then will she have to do to seduce him in 25yrs time? Let me guess,walk around the house naked. Haha!

pazienza:

All these for a marriage that is still so young? What then will she have to do to seduce him in 25yrs time? Let me guess,walk around the house naked. Haha!

Don't mind people with their tea and Lipton solutions.A two years marriage??,twice a month?even in a day sef,my bobo na EKWE! .Something not entirely normal is wrong somewhere.


I think the op shudnt rest until she finds out what's happening.She shud start by asking him directly without blinking if he is gay?She shud also try to encourage him to watch porn with her....
Again,Op needs to wear clothes that aren't to conservative.Again there is the issue of love too,does he love the wife??Some men hardly erect when they aren't in love with a woman.

bossybom: [color=#000099][/color]

yes we dated for 18months,premarital sex was a no no for both of us....we did talk about sexuality but how was I suppose to know dis by merely talking.

This d reason why I marvel at pple talking abt no sex b4 marriage, esp on religious ground. It's all BS. See where it led this union? And we have thousands of cases just like this. I mean how on earth would u know ur compatibility sexually wit ur mate if u don't have sex?

scaler345: This d reason why I marvel at pple talking abt no sex b4 marriage, esp on religious ground. It's all BS. See where it led this union? And we have thousands of cases just like this. I mean how on earth would u know ur compatibility sexually wit ur mate if u don't have sex?

@bolded

Aren't you people suppose to discuss how high or low your sexual urge is before marriage? Must you engage in the exchange of body fluids with every individual you date to determine sexual compatibility? You better fear God because if you think that you will not answer to God the day you die, you are gravely deceiving yourself. This is why many of you amount to nothing in life after compromising your destiny by spiritually tying yourself to all the various women you slept with.

dasparrow:

@bolded

Aren't you people suppose to discuss how high or low your sexual urge is before marriage? Must you engage in the exchange of body fluids with every individual you date to determine sexual compatibility? You better fear God because if you think that you will not answer to God the day you die, you are gravely deceiving yourself. This is why many of you amount to nothing in life after compromising your destiny by spiritually tying yourself to all the various women you slept with.

My dear I dey press my roasted corn well to find if e soft or strong.I no won buy pear finish at the end of the day,I no for fit chop corn.

assu2013: I think your pastor or his mom or dad or urs shall know about it a problem share is half sovle

any idea the difference between present and past tence ? Anyways...back to the matter

Can't advice cos I will think very differently

dat is d problem with all dis men dat dont touch there woman b4 marriage,b4 u know it d lady will regret getting married to d guy.[quote
author=bossybom][color=#000099][/color]

yes we dated for 18months,premarital sex was a no no for both of
us....we did talk about sexuality but how was I suppose to know dis by
merely talking.[/quote]

lynpetra:


My dear I dey press my roasted corn well to find if e soft or strong.I no won buy pear finish at the end of the day,I no for fit chop corn.

He he he sharp girl no dulling.

@ OP
Your hubby not liking sex doesnt make him Gay or a cheat. Infact it doesnt mean that he dislikes sex. He could be indeed tired. My hubby for example loves his SLEEP than s*x. When we got married i reserved s*x for nite thing and before I knw he is asleep especially when i had baby and she no gree sleep fast; hubby will be playing with us and before i knw he is fast asleep. Kiaaa. Thank God he was willing to talk about it and then we discovered nitee wasnt a gud time. Earlymorning s*x is so sweet on weekends you knw he is not going to work. Remind him that he can wake you up with his p*nnis by 5am. Then during weekends,tho, u said u are self employed; take break off work if possible and tell him you are at home cos of him so he musnt go out, get someone to care for your baby and have fun together. I remember my hubby wispering to me one afternoon that i should follow him to the room so he can deal with me(he has his slang for s*x) I buffed it off cos we had lots of family around (A Burial was coming up). I never wise then ooo. If he gives me that offer now i will grab it cos its a cheap way to have fun and people watching ur kids. So OP, dont be shy to talk to ur hubby and get what works for him before seeking other help.ow i will grab it cos its a cheap way to have fun.

But seriously, no insult intended, Pls answer d following qstns sincerely;

Are you attractive? Like, can ur looks appeal to a guy?Are you overweight "mama iyabo ish"? Polished?Clean hygienically?

Did u at any point in time have a "holier than God" attitude towards sex?

It's possible sex wt u is not satisfying, and he feels like it's work when he has to be with u. Sex is meant to be satisfying to both parties, from d pre-intimacy to d after play-cuddling n stuff.

You may have to re examine ur looks, ur hygiene, n ur approach/outlook towards sex.

@OP.... Marriage is in two ways it is either you ENDURE it or ENJOY it.... It is a taboo for you to cheat you cant any more that is your one channel TV... So please my advice for you is try to do more sex..y attracting things or you just keep on watching it!
Meci.

Lord, they said that we are stuppid not to test-drive. Please prove them wrong. Make her a mad woman in the bedroom when we get married so that I can come here and gloat in the faces of people like Mazi. Amen! Lord, You know I can take it.

@op, first, libidos vary, sex drives vary. Some guys aren't as sexually motivated as other guys.

Second, a guy with a low sex drive and a stressful job would be almost inoperative in the bedroom. Try de-stressifying him. Er, trying to get him to function sexually would not de-stressify him, it would stress him more. Men take sex not only as enjoyment but as work. It is a chance to prove something, to satisfy an expectation. So unless the guy has an average-to-high sex drive, talking about the sex and all might actually worsen things. But it might help - personalities differ here.

But it might work if you took any portion of the week that you know that he's not so busy and treat him to an exquisite holiday. Get his mind off work and off the bedroom matters. Maybe, go someplace, have a picnic. Have fun, laugh. He might surprise you. He might even make it a habit. Or you could.

It ia not certain that he is gay. I think we can't know that for sure. If he were gay, he may still act like that, but he would also act like that if he just has a low sex drive and is stressed out. So, it's too open. If he were pulling stunts outside your marriage bed, it would not necessarily prevent him from doing you six ways from Sunday every night. Some guys are randy like that. It would only prevent him if his stunts outside are.emotional.

So, allow me to encourage you to be innovative. Men and women withblow sex drives are a reality. And low sex drive is not an ailment, last I heard, nor does it require or respond to a cure. But even such people respond to love and can outperform themselves when rightly encouraged, I'll warrant.

God bless you, lady

@OP: He may be slightly asexual, or maybe he has a low sex drive.

Consider giving him much more or@l sex, it has been said to improve sex drive in males over a period of time.

Ihedinobi: Lord, they said that we are stuppid not to test-drive. Please prove them wrong. Make her a mad woman in the bedroom when we get married[b] so that I can come here and gloat in the faces of people like Mazi[/b]. Amen! Lord, You know I can take it.

Be careful what you wish for.

I hope this was not an arrangee marriage because this kind of thing happen more in those kind of marriages.

[quote
author=Ihedinobi]Lord, they said that we are stuppid not to test-drive.
Please prove them wrong. so that I can come here and gloat in the faces of people like
Mazi. Amen! Lord, :[/quote]

Pple tink practising xtians are stupid for doing d right thing.

why is the word stuupid displayed as silly, they mean different tins now. this NL word check sef!!

All these guys sef, so if a guy isn't interested in sex he is gay? no be so o! my own is not as bad as this guy but I can do without sex for awhile, na for pleasure no be work. I'm not saying that he's not gay, but people should stop just jumping to the conclusion that he is just cos he doesn't like sex, everybody is different and stereotypes are bad.

bishopoliver: Yur husband is Gay!!!

SECONDED!

Mazi_Omenuko: Okk, I've forgiven you for the blatant error of not getting to know your husband sexually before marriage. Now, let's see what we can do.

I guess all the 3-D advises are confusing you now. Let's skip the gay part and concentrate on the low libido part.
I support the idea of giving him geinsing laden drugs. But how do you get him to take it? This is where communication comes in. Talk to him. We men have ego issues and I bet you he won't own up to having a problem. If you're lucky enough he agrees on taking the geinseing drugs, then it will boost his libido so much that he will be chasing after you all thru the bedroom

Option B: if he doesn't believe he has a problem and refuses taking the drugs, then you have to resort to another form of geinsieng sold in form of tea drinks and coffee. I will recommend Edmark Geinseing coffee. It might not have the immediate effect as its drug counterpart, but will certainly get the desired result within few days to a week. If you're lucky enough he likes the coffee (which I'm sure he would love), then you can be serving it to him regularly.

Don't ever discuss his problems with a third party: not his parents, pastor, relatives and most especially, not his friends.

Goodluck.

anything wrong with a low libido guy taking a break to build up his libido?

instead of drugging him up 24/7 and hopping on top of the fellow in desperation?

why cant all parties involved cool off for a while to allow the testosterone levels time to rebuild?

Is it possible madam that you at any point in your marriage denied him sex with excuses of tiredness over a period of time? Or did u completely deny him attention around the time after your baby was born?
Why am asking is that some men are wired to detest any stuff they desperately craved for initially but were denied on many ocassions.once they find a way to cope with being denied, they later develop a thick skin and learn to cope without it or find other ways of relieving themselves.
Gradually with this he might come to get used to viewing u more like a sister than a sex mate.
To women who are used to denying their hubbys sex, u are sitting on a time bomb, for a time would come when nothing u do wud keep him interested. Then u wud com to NL crying "he hasn't touched me for a year!"

She who has hears let her clean it well!

Op, buy rugged blue films full ya house na! It will catch his attention and would have to use you for a test run. thank me later

lasher1: Is it possible madam that you at any point in your marriage denied him sex with excuses of tiredness over a period of time? Or did u completely deny him attention around the time after your baby was born?
Why am asking is that some men are wired to detest any stuff they desperately craved for initially but were denied on many ocassions.once they find a way to cope with being denied, they later develop a thick skin and learn to cope without it or find other ways of relieving themselves.
Gradually with this he might come to get used to viewing u more like a sister than a sex mate.
To women who are used to denying their hubbys sex, u are sitting on a time bomb, for a time would come when nothing u do wud keep him interested. Then u wud com to NL crying "he hasn't touched me for a year!"

She who has hears let her clean it well!

Soooo TRUE!

Mazi_Omenuko:

When I started a thread on it, encouraging sex in a relationship, nairalanders wanted to tear my head off! Now this is where your happily ever after has landed you.
Endure it, afterall, its going to be a 75 years of misery, your reward is in heaven.

#did you say 2 times in a week? Damn! That's half of what you're supposed to enjoy PER DAY!

you are on point

i never knew some men can be naturally sexphobia not until my sis married her husband. Though the man is potent but he can stay for more than a month without even noticing he is living with a woman. All he does is eat, chat and sleep only to wake up the next dat off to work.

Its pathetic

U guys that are saying d husband should see a doctor, I tire 4 una oh. 4rm d op's explanation, the husband did not believe he has a problem, all he is says is being tired. So pple should address dt area. And for those saying she should dress sexily, seduce and all that, dnt u think her husband wil read meaning to that? D man no jst get interest 4 d thing. Mi 2k op, get a matured elder dt can tlk 2 him n dre are books dt address issues like this or erotica books, buy them for him.