no comment

Michyeddy: Am bored already....NEXTTTTT

Am all avaliable 4u if necessary dear,..alert me immedaitely

/
It is called innovation.
Personally I don't think traditional marriage in the village is worth the risk anymore.

A couple should bring their two families together, perform the rites and move on.
There have been a lot of sad tales around traditional marriages in recent times.
And Nollywood is not helping matters at all.

You should also ask why people rarely travel to their villages anymore.
Everything happens for a reason

//

Phder: 1. Will you pay the $1000+ each that would be spend on transportation by the couple back home?
2. Will you guarantee their safety during the wedding?
3. Will you protect them from the witches and wizards after the wedding?
4. Will you guarantee the safety of their friends that would come for the wedding?
5. Will you hold the plane with your hands and pray against crashing?
Your question is bull..ss.hit. You can get married in US with less than $5k., including the dowry and other important stuff, why waste your yearly savings on travelling to Nigeria, and impressing those who don't really care??

Which kind $5k, go to las vegas and do drive through marriage. Do you all remember the graduate student lady Nigerian-Missourian who came for wedding in Nigeria but sadly died in plane crash in Nigeria? Very sad story.

God has promised me in Joshua 1:11 that wherever I step my foot has been given to me as my inheritance. So I will do my traditional whatever in my inherited land.

chiogoezubem:

I could teach, but then you would have to pay.

i also wanna learn
we could choose our method of payment & after much deliberation & weighing our options, we decided 2 pay in kind as its also a cashless means of payment good enough 4 security reasons.
And the e-mode of payment on NL was decided. Hope dis was fair enough

nacosprof: Am all avaliable 4u if necessary dear,..alert me immedaitely

hope am not misinterpreting somtin?

Wonder why this is first page! I still dey vex for the mod wey no put my previous topic for first page only for person to steal my concept and Mod accepted such person.

Phder: 1. Will you pay the $1000+ each that would be spend on transportation by the couple back home?
2. Will you guarantee their safety during the wedding?
3. Will you protect them from the witches and wizards after the wedding?
4. Will you guarantee the safety of their friends that would come for the wedding?
5. Will you hold the plane with your hands and pray against crashing?
Your question is bull..ss.hit. You can get married in US with less than $5k., including the dowry and other important stuff, why waste your yearly savings on travelling to Nigeria, and impressing those who don't really care??

Ur a wicked dude
If God bless u, u can do all that.

£&nairato&froUK:
if they do it abroad doest dat mean they are not properly??

things change, u have to get wit the times.

i watched a youruba traditional marraige on tv a few weeks ago, a yoruba girl and an english boy.#

the girls parents even gran ma was there and it was a very enjoyable ceremony. all traditions and customs were adhered to. are they not married??

must u risk everbody's life across the ocean to a place wit no road, no electric and no safety?


before u know accident don happen, person don die, dats wat happened to my bestfriend's eldest brother.
dats if kidnapper no catch u first

its not worth the hassle

I definately agree with the safety concern. And how much will everyone enjoy their visit to nigeria when they are moving around with bodyguards and restrictions in public.
whenever i go there, i cant even talk without everyone stopping what they are doing to look at me. and my husbands family is nervous the whole time because of kidnappers.

ETT

Most weddings are a silly display of vanity (usually for the woman's benefit) and a sorry waste of resources. But to then demand that everyone fly from one country to another is ridiculous.

I personally do not understand why it is necessary for two weddings or why some people insist on flying large groups of people to another country for an event that should take a few hours.

texazzpete:

I think you should mind your business. Marry off your children the way you see fit, but stop judging others.

Maybe someone else with toe your path of not minding your business and open a thread complaining about people opening nairaland threads at 6:15am instead of going to church

The op has a valid point, and you don't. It is unfortunate that some people (like you) find it ok to degrade our culture but will defend their religious rituals to death. As an instance, people now use Italian wine (my cousin had to because her religious husband believes that drinking palm wine is a sin!) instead of the traditional palm wine. And people like you will probably support it. Will you agree to the use of palm wine for your holy communion? Over your dead body I hear you say.

The point is that it is not compulsory to do a traditional wedding. But if you choose to, then it is proper to do it the right way. It is my business when it involves my culture as I am against its degradation.

I don't have any problem with where the traditional wedding is taking place, my take will be on the manner and ways (cultural procedures) of the event. Culture, a way of life, is not a practice that should only be observed in ones land (village/home town) but any place we find ourselves.
Traditional wedding should be conducted in the proper way and culture of the celebrant (bride), which simply tells the story of the people and their way of life. This should be done irrespective of the geographical location but with the intent of showcasing and spreading the culture of the people to others around.

In Igbo tradition it is compulsory that the man pays the bride pricer of his wife by going to the woman village and full filling all customs and tradition.
If he is overseas he can send money to his family to carry out the traditional marriage on his behalf.
If in the event the woman dies withouth the man paying the bride price,the children will revert to the family of the woman and there will be heavy consequences cause the man will be forced to marry the corpse before any proper burial

deadie:


The op has a valid point, and you don't. It is unfortunate that some people (like you) find it ok to degrade our culture but will defend their religious rituals to death. As an instance, people now use Italian wine (my cousin had to because her religious husband believes that drinking palm wine is a sin!) instead of the traditional palm wine. And people like you will probably support it. Will you agree to the use of palm wine for your holy communion? Over your dead body I hear you say.

The point is that it is not compulsory to do a traditional wedding. But if you choose to, then it is proper to do it the right way. It is my business when it involves my culture as I am against its degradation.

Thank you. It's shameful how so many people are open to the degradation of their traditional marriage customs, some even considering it "not necessary". Can you imagine? Your own people's marriage traditions (which have been practiced since time immeomorial) are no longer necessary, but the white man's wedding is now more important? Inferiority complex at its worst.

Some may say that it's none of my business how people choose to conduct their traditional weddings, but it is my culture and therefore involves me. What we're witnessing is the degredation of culture and cultural customs; any person concerned with the integrity of his people's cultural values will speak out.

£&nairato&froUK:
if they do it abroad doest dat mean they are not properly??

things change, u have to get wit the times.

i watched a youruba traditional marraige on tv a few weeks ago, a yoruba girl and an english boy.#

the girls parents even gran ma was there and it was a very enjoyable ceremony. all traditions and customs were adhered to. are they not married??

must u risk everbody's life across the ocean to a place wit no road, no electric and no safety?


before u know accident don happen, person don die, dats wat happened to my bestfriend's eldest brother.
dats if kidnapper no catch u first

its not worth the hassle

. Y una no dy undastd trend b4 una begin comment. D op said traditional wedding nt white wedding. Dia is ntin wrong in doing white wedding in a foreign land, bt wen u wnt 2 do a traditional wedding, u wl hv 2 obey d rules strictly.

enyi1: why is this on front page!!!

because it is utterly rubbish

odumchi:

Thank you. It's shameful how so many people are open to the degradation of their traditional marriage customs, some even considering it "not necessary". Can you imagine? Your own people's marriage traditions (which have been practiced since time immeomorial) are no longer necessary, but the white man's wedding is now more important? Inferiority complex at its worst.

Some may say that it's none of my business how people choose to conduct their traditional weddings, but it is my culture and therefore involves me. What we're witnessing is the degredation of culture and cultural customs; any person concerned with the integrity of his people's cultural values will speak out.

So are you saying if I love my ibo fiance to death and both our families are based in Lagos, her father has a family home in Lagos, all our friends and relatives are in Lagos and it would save us a couple of Thousands or Millions if we choose to do the Traditional marriage in Lagos in her father's compound with all the families of the couple there, No traditional wedding should take place again because we didn't go to Owerri to do it? I should break up with her because I am degrading the cultural custom of an Ibo traditional marriage? If I spend all the money to do party in the village, transport everybody to the village to break kola nut and after the wedding I cannot feed my wife because I have satisfied the cultural rites in the village, will that make sense to you?

Thanks to the westerners for spreading their mental disease on we african, and big hugs to the african especially the ladies for their huge success when it comes to copy copy. Am just watching, looking where we are heading to.

lawyer:

So are you saying if I love my ibo fiance to death and both our families are based in Lagos, her father has a family home in Lagos, all our friends and relatives are in Lagos and it would save us a couple of Thousands or Millions if we choose to do the Traditional marriage in Lagos in her father's compound with all the families of the couple there, No traditional wedding should take place again because we didn't go to Owerri to do it? I should break up with her because I am degrading the cultural custom of an Ibo traditional marriage? If I spend all the money to do party in the village, transport everybody to the village to break kola nut and after the wedding I cannot feed my wife because I have satisfied the cultural rites in the village, will that make sense to you?

nobody is forcing u to do traditional marriage naa...ppl 4get that marriage is ''for better for worse'', so when the worse finally comes they wont know wia 2 start, marriage is more than just a union of two ppl, and when u go into it without proper consultations...

enyi1: why is this on front page!!!

Nna help me ask ooo

odumchi: Personally, I find it funny when people conduct so-called "traditional" marriages (which oftentimes are not traditional in in any way, shape, or form and are simply parties in which the bride and groom are dressed in lace or ankara) overseas instead of going home [to Nigeria]. I understand that sometimes there might be financial constraints and all that, but that doesn't negate the fact that [to me] it's such a weird idea. I mean, isn't the idea behind marrying someone traditionally supposed to be fulfilling the marital customs of the woman's land (speaking from the Igbo perspective)?

Speaking from my culture's perspective, a traditional marriage is a social event in which all of the head members of the bride's family formally "hand away" their daughter to the groom's family. These marriages are always performed at the compound of the bride's parents and follow the rules and regulations of the bride's land and end with the long procession of the groom, his new wife, and his people, back to their home. With this in mind, I'd like to seek your opinions on this issue? What do you think about "ovaseez marajiz".

The reason traditional marriage is celebrated abroad is so the bride's parents don't miss out on 'the list of gifts'. . . brideprice etc

texazzpete:

I think you should mind your business. Marry off your children the way you see fit, but stop judging others.

Maybe someone else with toe your path of not minding your business and open a thread complaining about people opening nairaland threads at 6:15am instead of going to church

Haba

lawyer:

So are you saying if I love my ibo fiance to death and both our families are based in Lagos, her father has a family home in Lagos, all our friends and relatives are in Lagos and it would save us a couple of Thousands or Millions if we choose to do the Traditional marriage in Lagos in her father's compound with all the families of the couple there, No traditional wedding should take place again because we didn't go to Owerri to do it? I should break up with her because I am degrading the cultural custom of an Ibo traditional marriage? If I spend all the money to do party in the village, transport everybody to the village to break kola nut and after the wedding I cannot feed my wife because I have satisfied the cultural rites in the village, will that make sense to you?

The marriage is traditional for a reason and you must celebrate it according to the customs of her people's land. If you know that you cannot carry out the traditional marriage the proper way, then don't do it or wait till you can! Do not degrade another man's culture because you find it more convenient to do things your way. Simple.

All that matters is that tradition is considered and still upheld. Flying a family home for a traditional wedding isn't easy, especially for those born and based abroad. As much as I love traditional weddings, the vast majority of family whom I'd want present at my wedding are here in the states. I wouldn't like to go home and get married in front of people whom are like strangers to me.

I applaud anyone who does a traditional wedding, both home and abroad. There are several Nigerians doing solely white weddings in Nigeria without giving traditional weddings any thought.

odumchi: Personally, I find it funny when people conduct so-called "traditional" marriages (which oftentimes are not traditional in in any way, shape, or form and are simply parties in which the bride and groom are dressed in lace or ankara) overseas instead of going home [to Nigeria]. I understand that sometimes there might be financial constraints and all that, but that doesn't negate the fact that [to me] it's such a weird idea. I mean, isn't the idea behind marrying someone traditionally supposed to be fulfilling the marital customs of the woman's land (speaking from the Igbo perspective)?

Speaking from my culture's perspective, a traditional marriage is a social event in which all of the head members of the bride's family formally "hand away" their daughter to the groom's family. These marriages are always performed at the compound of the bride's parents and follow the rules and regulations of the bride's land and end with the long procession of the groom, his new wife, and his people, back to their home. With this in mind, I'd like to seek your opinions on this issue? What do you think about "ovaseez marajiz".

I agree to an extent.

I planned to marry my then Fiancee in Nigeria but she was denied a fiancee visa and this forced us to do the marriage in Nigeria.

In retrospect I am eternally grateful to the American Consular Officer for the original denial as I was able to do a proper traditional marriage for my Wife in Nigeria.

Is it bad if the wedding is done outside Nigeria? Not necessarily but when I view our wedding pictures and videos I am glad that we did it in Nigeria. The attendance by immediate and extended families, neighbors, coworkers, etc all made it an unforgettable experience for us.

odumchi: Personally, I find it funny when people conduct so-called "traditional" marriages (which oftentimes are not traditional in in any way, shape, or form and are simply parties in which the bride and groom are dressed in lace or ankara) overseas instead of going home [to Nigeria]. I understand that sometimes there might be financial constraints and all that, but that doesn't negate the fact that [to me] it's such a weird idea. I mean, isn't the idea behind marrying someone traditionally supposed to be fulfilling the marital customs of the woman's land (speaking from the Igbo perspective)?

Speaking from my culture's perspective, a traditional marriage is a social event in which all of the head members of the bride's family formally "hand away" their daughter to the groom's family. These marriages are always performed at the compound of the bride's parents and follow the rules and regulations of the bride's land and end with the long procession of the groom, his new wife, and his people, back to their home. With this in mind, I'd like to seek your opinions on this issue? What do you think about "ovaseez marajiz".

Personally, I think you shouldnt be bothered about it. Even in naija, traditional marriages are being held at federal palace hotels, Eko hotels etc where the only thing traditional about the marriages is the traditional outfit worn by the couple. Every other thing is far from traditional. And just so you know, family heads, unlike before, don't just gather to hand away daughters or eat bitter kola or kolanut...Things don change. Traditional marriages can now be celebrated anywhere in the world - Dubai, City Centre in Manchester, Empire Lounge in Toronto, or even King's Court in Scotland...with champagne popping...so bro, marriage na marriage.

I don't mind ooo. Let my sweetheart come first, I can do it in Mars sef.