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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Funny JOKES With #Tolu (6568 Views)
Wet Latest And Funny Jokes On Your Whatsapp, Drop Ur Numbers / Crack Ya Ribs With This Funny Jokes / Nigerian Jokes (2) (3) (4)
Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 9:14pm On Nov 07, 2013 |
TOLU FUN TIME!!! Trouble is:- --Wen D person interviewing U @ ur new job is D same guy u insulted in traffic. U go apologize tire --Wen U tel Ur friend ''Ur Mama'' & turn around & see his/her mum staring @ U. Meeehn ,she go show u say u no nid cuttlery 2 chop slap. --Wen u'r up against Lionel Messi in ur debut game as a Defender. E go beta say u collect red card --Wen mosquito lands on ur fada's bald head& u try 2 kill it wit ur bare hands. U must provide d proof ooh or else. -- Wen Patience is ur English teacher b4 Waec. Na A1 u dey DREAM about u go get no worry. --Wen Victor Valdes wins GoalKeeper of d yr. Abeg eeeee --Wen U update ''Salary Thingz'' on FB & ur landlord comments ''On Point'' U go travel go villa by force --Wen u'r in a bus & U throw away #500 Noteinstead of gala wrapper. Ol' boy e don red b dat. --Wen ur dad works @ Nepa & they take lite, then u shout ''God punish Nepa''......and he's there wit u. Na ur Mama go start 2 pay ur Schl fees. --Wen u finish eating in an eatery & u find outur wallet fell out in a taxi. Start 2 prepare ur grammer. --When Usain Bolt chases u wit a cutlass. Ol'boy just stop, beg am. --Wen u giv beggar #1,000 note instead of#50. Generosity go change Noni. Add ur own join ABEG COMMENT NAW U WAN KILL CAREER. 3 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 9:17pm On Nov 07, 2013 |
wen u they go evangelism with your pastor and all church members and one ASHEWO shout CUSTOMER LONG TIME 2 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by dultraray: 9:32pm On Nov 07, 2013 |
Wen u go mistake ur phone number 4 examination number 4 Waec na f9 b dato |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 9:25pm On Nov 08, 2013 |
TOLU QUESTION!!! My name is TOLU, I used my friend to set up my girlfriend to see if she'll cheat on me. Now they have sent me a wedding IV......WHAT AM I? A. Learner B.God sent C.Mumu. |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 2:02pm On Nov 09, 2013 |
An ugly woman walk in a store with her two kids, yelling at them. SAKA, the store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children. Are they twins? The ugly woman stop yelling and said, "Hell no, they are not. One is 9 yrs old & the other is 7 yrs old. Why dah hell would you think they are twins, are you blind, or stupid?" TOLU replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would sleep with you twice!!" ONE WORD TOLU 4 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:38pm On Nov 09, 2013 |
Guys wey dey always brag abt their hustle.. You hustle reach judas? Mehn that guy sold jesus... Hustle of life... PEEPS am new at dis section ur comments and likes wodb appreciated 3 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:41pm On Nov 09, 2013 |
Remember wen women dey chase me den,. i dey form level then... Baba God da igba pada o... GO BE WARNED |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by Nobody: 8:58pm On Nov 09, 2013 |
Lol |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by Biafra91(m): 9:26pm On Nov 09, 2013 |
Men, U made my nite wit ur jokes. Tanx & kip it up! 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:25pm On Nov 10, 2013 |
A girl posted on facebook "ALL MEN ARE DOGS" and TOLU replied "WHICH BREED IS YOUR FATHER" who is at fault pls 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:26pm On Nov 10, 2013 |
Biafra 91: Men, U made my nite wit ur jokes. Tanx & kip it up!tanx bro |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:27pm On Nov 10, 2013 |
TOLU£N£:name sake u go pay 4dat name...tanx anyways |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:27pm On Nov 10, 2013 |
TOLU£N£:name sake u go pay 4dat name...tanx anyways |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 5:28pm On Nov 10, 2013 |
My girlfriend buy wig of 450k kon dey complain of headache.She no knw say na 2plots of land for mowe/ibafo she carry so.if u be her boyfriend you go allow am loose am 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 5:59am On Nov 12, 2013 |
Tolu Screams into an Envelope all because he wanted to send a VOICE "MAIL" one for Tolu |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 6:20am On Nov 12, 2013 |
Girlz to Boyz . . 1980's : Love me, but don't touch me. . . 1990's : Touch me, but don'tkiss me. . . 2000's : Kiss me, but don't do anything more. . . 2010's : Do anything, but don't tell anyone. . . Since 2013 : Do everything, otherwise I will tell everyone that you can't do anything... 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 1:27pm On Nov 12, 2013 |
A mortuary attendant was receiving bodies when he saw this body with the name mike on it with the longest dickey he has ever seen he decided to cut it off and go show his wife, when he reached home he called out his wife "Sweetie come I wanna show you something" the wife came and on spotting the dickey she screamed "YOU MEAN MIKE IS DEAD!!!!!!!? 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 4:37pm On Nov 12, 2013 |
There were three nuns and a mother sperior. The mother sperior told the three nuns that before they can receive their saint names they had one final test she told them to go and commit one sin so that they would not have urges to be bad. Aftet the three nuns returned, the mother superior asked "did you commit your sins they all nodded their head. the first two nuns were crying while nun TOLU the last nun was gigling. The mother superior asked them to confess their sins one after the other. The first nun started with tears in his eyes "i was just rotten; i picked up flowers from some one's garden the mother superior said go drink the holy water n u'll be alright nun TOLU was dancing around in laughter . the second nun said he stole candy from a baby he was asked to drink the holy water. now nun TOLU fell on the floor hysterically laughing. The mother superior was disusted by his act and |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 10:09pm On Nov 12, 2013 |
Ugly gurls gettin married evry saturday,the pretty ones wil be buyin ASO EBI looking glamorous in d wedding pictures waiting for dangote or jonathans son... 2 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by PrettySpicey(f): 8:27pm On Nov 13, 2013 |
@Tolu, really great jokes. U av me roflmao. Keep it coming, man. |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 11:08pm On Nov 13, 2013 |
PrettySpicey: @Tolu,tanx dear |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 11:10pm On Nov 13, 2013 |
Here is the list of some funny observations about Nigerian Nollywood movies. 1. It's funny that a Ghost picks up a call in Nollywood. How is it actually possible? 2. Interesting to know: why should a Ghost look "left and right" before crossing the road? 3. Isn't it funny when two Ghost to fall in love? 4. Why do Nollywood characters always die or run mad immediately after their confessions? 5. How come a legendary Village Movie, set in the 70′s, still find Brazilian hair on Mercy Johnson? 6. Why must all hired assassins be found in uncompleted or abandoned buildings? 7. Can you imagine a complete Yoruba movie without a visit to the 'Baba'? 8. How can one explain that nine times out of ten Olu Jacobs dies of heart attack in Nollywood movies. 9. "15 years ago" , Ini Edo calls her boyfriend using a Blackberry Bold 5. 10. When poor people come to Lagos to struggle, they always make it. Really? 11. Isn't it funny when Segun Arinze acts as Ramsey Noah's dad? 12. It's quite a strange thing to hear from a blind woman: "I'm happy to see you, my son". Maybe you have something to add? 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 11:13pm On Nov 13, 2013 |
TOLU and three of his University student didn't write an exam because they did not study. TOLU then came up with a plan, got themselves dirty using grease then went to see the Dean. "Sir we are sorry we couldn't make it to then exam. We attended a wedding and on our way back the car broke down thus we became so dirty as you can see." The Dean understood and gave TOLU and his friend three days to prepare. After three days they went to the Dean very ready for the exam because they had studied. The Dean put them in there separate classes. There were only four questions in the exam paper: 1. Who and who got married? (25 mks) 2. Where was the reception held? (25mks) 3. Where exactly did the car break down? (25mks) 4. What type of car broke down? (25mks) Note: Your answers must be the same. Good luck! . |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by Connoisseur(m): 3:30am On Nov 14, 2013 |
toluleke: There were three nuns and a mother come guy no let me vex with u. complete this now now |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 12:01pm On Nov 14, 2013 |
Connoisseur:TOLU fell on the floor hysterically laughing. The mother superior was disusted by his act and inquired, "what are you laughing at?" TOLU,trying to catch his breath was bearly able to say this "I PEED INTO THE HOLY WATER 3 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 8:13pm On Nov 19, 2013 |
THE DOCTOR The Lagos State Medical Doctors were on Strike. A senior Doc was in a hurry to join his colleague in the protest while in the theatre on a patient, so he left Dr. TOLU - his male assistant in charge. The senior doc came back & asked, "How did u get on?" Dr TOLU says, "I had 3 Patients. The 1st had a Headache so I give her Paracetamol" "Good man" says the Senior Doc. "The 2nd had Indigestion, so I gave her Gaviscon." "Well done." said the senior Doc. "The 3rd was a Young gorgeous woman who burst into d room, took off all her clothes & lay downon the table, spreads her legs and shouts, 'Please, please help me, I haven't seen a man in 5 years……...!'" "Shiiit!!! What did you do?" asks the senior Doc. Dr TOLU replies, "I gave her Eyedrops. 1 Like |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 8:23pm On Nov 19, 2013 |
WHO FOOLISH PASS BTW SAKA,AKPORS AND TOLU..PLS COMMENTS AND CRITICS WOULD BE APPRECIATED. |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by Nobody: 10:05pm On Nov 20, 2013 |
toluleke: THE DOCTOR Ha! Olodo |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 1:41am On Nov 21, 2013 |
maishot:if na u wetin u go do |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 2:22am On Nov 21, 2013 |
2 idiots standin at museum lookin at an Egyptian mummy wit 1347BC written below it. Joba:Wht does that mean. TOLU:It must be her BB Pin 2 Likes |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by Nobody: 10:40am On Nov 21, 2013 |
toluleke: 2 idiots standin at museum lookin at *faints* |
Re: Funny JOKES With #Tolu by toluleke(m): 12:31pm On Nov 21, 2013 |
*A guy takes a girl on a date. She orders costly champagne, oysters, lobsters, the most expensive food on the menu. The guy asks: “Do you eat like this at your mom’s place?” The girl replies, “No, my mother doesn’t plan to sleep with me after the meal.’ 1 Like |
Funny Conversation Between An Employer And His Employee / Dont Open Cos You Wont Stop Laughing: / Apkos N D Thief Very Funny
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