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House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This - Family - Nairaland

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House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 1:29pm On Dec 04, 2013
I've just finished doing the dishes. While at it, I began to think on whether I could ever assist my wife with kitchen work once I get married.

I love kids, so that'll never pose a problem. Washing clothes? Yeah, got a washing machine at home.

I just find sweeping, washing dishes, etc. demeaning.

Will I change when I finally get married? Maybe, just maybe.

So, what's your take on this? Do you (as a female) think male ego is at work here?

Any man there who's gone through/is going through this?
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by badmeat(m): 1:34pm On Dec 04, 2013
I cook for my wife!I help her do the laundry,my friend if u think its easy for the female folks,take a break and do all the chores at home,u will find out its a lot of work!I pay my wife allowances for her trouble!she is my wife,flesh of my flesh!

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Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by angiemartinez(f): 1:34pm On Dec 04, 2013
That is the area where my hubby gets me angry, he dosnt just help with the kitchen at all. am like what will it cost u? will it make you less of a man? abeg i just try try to do my thing without bothering him

1 Like

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 1:36pm On Dec 04, 2013
@ badmeat

Doesn't she take you for granted?
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 1:38pm On Dec 04, 2013
angiemartinez: That is the area where my hubby gets me angry, he dosnt just help with the kitchen at all. am like what will it cost u? will it make you less of a man? abeg i just try try to do my thing without bothering him

Have you ever asked him why?
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 1:45pm On Dec 04, 2013
angiemartinez: That is the area where my hubby gets me angry, he dosnt just help with the kitchen at all. am like what will it cost u? will it make you less of a man? abeg i just try try to do my thing without bothering him
after the day's hustle, you still expect him to work in your kitchen? Why did he marry you?

3 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 1:51pm On Dec 04, 2013
Where is Mynd_44?

Maybe the ba3 to d sensor dat alerts him anytime a thread against women is open is low.

3 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by ITbomb(m): 2:24pm On Dec 04, 2013
Wow, sometimes you never consider it important to think that your wife would ever ask you to help in the kitchen and when she eventually do in after marriage, it brings problems.
Just adding to my list of things we need to sort out before we go further.
But for me it depends, if she was doing stew and her hands ar all immersed in tomato paste and she call me to help her pour water on her hands, that shouldnt be a problem, but she call me to wish the dishes cos she has finish preparing the food, she will need to go back to her mum and learn certain things

4 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:32pm On Dec 04, 2013
bad meat: I cook for my wife!I help her do the laundry,my friend if u think its easy for the female folks,take a break and do all the chores at home,u will find out its a lot of work!I pay my wife allowances for her trouble!she is my wife,flesh of my flesh!
You're a good man bro. This is the difference between men and small boys. . .

As long as she is your wife, your marriage-mate, mother of your children, there is NOTHING too big to help her with. It's not as if she is expecting you to take over her responsibilities as a wife and mother, but common sense and human empathy and love should prevail over a woman you call wife and you should help her out often. . . A wife is not a maid.

If she is happy, you are happy. Now, what's too much to do for your own happiness?

21 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:36pm On Dec 04, 2013
bad meat: I cook for my wife!I help her do the laundry,my friend if u think its easy for the female folks,take a break and do all the chores at home,u will find out its a lot of work!I pay my wife allowances for her trouble!she is my wife,flesh of my flesh!

You get younger brother wey get sense like you? wink

10 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:38pm On Dec 04, 2013
sexkillz: You're a good man bro. This is the difference between men and small boys. . .

As long as she is your wife, your marriage-mate, mother of your children, there is NOTHING too big to help her with. It's not as if she is expecting you to take over her responsibilities as a wife and mother, but common sense and human empathy and love should prevail over a woman you call wife and you should help her out often. . . A wife is not a maid.

If she is happy, you are happy. Now, what's too much to do for your own happiness?

Her responsibilities?.
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Miner13: 2:40pm On Dec 04, 2013
alutacontinua:

You get younger brother wey get sense like you? wink

hmmmmmmm!
Did you think you can get two messiah from family at the same time?.
If you there enter this.. Lady thats' one chance
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Beync(f): 2:40pm On Dec 04, 2013
alutacontinua:

You get younger brother wey get sense like you? wink
grin
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Miner13: 2:45pm On Dec 04, 2013
sexkillz: You're a good man bro. This is the difference between men and small boys. . .

As long as she is your wife, your marriage-mate, mother of your children, there is NOTHING too big to help her with. It's not as if she is expecting you to take over her responsibilities as a wife and mother, but common sense and human empathy and love should prevail over a woman you call wife and you should help her out often. . . A wife is not a maid.

If she is happy, you are happy. Now, what's too much to do for your own happiness?

well, what you are saying can't put an iota of belief in me, that you can do all this for your wife.
Easy said than done

5 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by mspee(f): 2:48pm On Dec 04, 2013
alutacontinua:

You get younger brother wey get sense like you? wink


You too like better thing! cheesy
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Miner13: 2:49pm On Dec 04, 2013
To me i can't leave house work to my wife whenever am at home.
There would day, i would take over evry kitchen work to show her everytime i am better in the kitchen.

Besides!

Whenever couples help each other in house work. The joy knows no bound. What a happy home

5 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:50pm On Dec 04, 2013
Miner13:

well, what you are saying can't put an iota of belief in me, that you can do all this for your wife.
Easy said than done
I don't care about you or your beliefs.

3 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:52pm On Dec 04, 2013
ms_pee:


You too like better thing! cheesy

tongue tongue cheesy cheesy
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by critique101(f): 2:53pm On Dec 04, 2013
Its gud to c that some men can reason with us
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by dayleke: 2:57pm On Dec 04, 2013
Guys,I think we need to change our mentality when it comes to this.
There are no set rules in when it comes to doing chores around the house.
It's your house too for crying out loud.
There's nothing I can't do around the house.It does not make you less of a man.
I do dishes,cook,clean and what have you?
The same thing that makes you look forward to a hot meal when coming from work also applies to your wifey,
She too is entitled to get that when she gets back from work(provided you are home).
As she is doing the laundry,I'm folding the clothes.
There is joy in sharing na.....

9 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 2:58pm On Dec 04, 2013
@tjololade:


Her responsibilities?.
Her roles as a wife and mother. Responsibilities towards you and the kids and her home.
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Omen100(m): 3:22pm On Dec 04, 2013
ms_pee:


You too like better thing! cheesy

She like were soft like pawpaw yam. With all honesty, I used to do the same but she took my simplicity for pliability to the extent that she expect me to wash the dishes after friends & family members finished eating and as a native Africa traditional man, I put a final end to all the nonsense play by always sitting in front of the Television like a Boss anytime she is in the kitchen cooking and she dare not say a word. ... grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin

2 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 3:25pm On Dec 04, 2013
Omen100:

She like were soft like pawpaw yam. With all honesty, I used to do the same but she took my simplicity for pliability to the extent that she expect me to wash the dishes after friends & family members finished eating and as a native Africa traditional man, I put a final end to all the nonsense play by always sitting in front of the Television like a Boss anytime she is in the kitchen cooking and she dare not say a word. ... grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin

Exactly my point! I know it'll get to this sooner or later.

Wouldn't it be better to keep away from such 'acts of love' before one gets his paws burned?
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Danhumprey: 3:28pm On Dec 04, 2013
alutacontinua:

You get younger brother wey get sense like you? wink
I am his younger brother. wink wink

1 Like

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Danhumprey: 3:38pm On Dec 04, 2013
Helping your wife in household cores doesn't demean you or make you less of a man. Infact,there is happiness in doing those cores. I guess it's the African man's mentality and ego that make him think that doing such work is demeaning.

For those of you who grew up in predominantly male households(where there were no female child),didn't you do those household jobs? Were they demeaning? No! You even grew up doing those cores. Now you are an adult and married,why should it be demeaning?

1 Like

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by UjSizzle(f): 3:39pm On Dec 04, 2013
TribalEAST: after the day's hustle, you still expect him to work in your kitchen? Why did he marry you?
So he married her coz it's convenient
We learn everyday.
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by ITbomb(m): 3:49pm On Dec 04, 2013
uj_sizzle:
So he married her coz it's convenient
We learn everyday.
I read somewhere about the word 'Help-met'
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Sijo01(f): 3:58pm On Dec 04, 2013
TribalEAST: after the day's hustle, you still expect him to work in your kitchen? Why did he marry you?

What makes you think she's not working??...........btw, its called giving a helping hand not 'work'

1 Like

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 4:01pm On Dec 04, 2013
THIS IS AFRICA.

Give a woman too much freedom and she becomes the BOSS thinking its your duty.

Its a social norm. Adam gave eve so much attention his life became miserable.

The kitchen solely belong to the wife and should be a place where she shows her CARE for her husband who gets caught up everyday trying to provide for the family.


Not chauvinistic.


Play your role

5 Likes

Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by angiemartinez(f): 4:03pm On Dec 04, 2013
he just sees it as my sole responsibility.
smurfy:

Have you ever asked him why?
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by Nobody: 4:04pm On Dec 04, 2013
Sijo01:

What makes you think she's not working??...........btw, its called giving a helping hand not 'work'
does your father "give an helping hand" in the kitchen?

Insult not intended.
Re: House Work: Sorry, Dear. You Can't Get Me To Do This by angiemartinez(f): 4:05pm On Dec 04, 2013
TribalEAST: after the day's hustle, you still expect him to work in your kitchen? Why did he marry you?
dont i go to work as well? so is marriage all about the kitchen?

1 Like

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