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What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Matthewbriggs(m): 3:41pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Hello fathers and mothers... My brother and I, are having a verrrrrry heated debate on what is the key thing that can make a marriage work. OPTION A- He says it's true love that keeps a mariage. OPTION B - I say it's commitment to that mariage that keeps it Please among this two options chose the one you think is correct or closer to been right. PS. we both decided to put this up to get your opinion to SO we can end this debate once and for all. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 3:54pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Love koh, love nih! It's pple in fantasy land that bliv some strange emotions that cannot be rationalized can make u live with anoda person forever! It take a conscious effort aka commitment! Option B all the way, IMO! 2 Likes |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by EfemenaXY: 3:55pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Hardwork, dedication, commitment, compromises and above all, understanding. Love is just the icing on the cake. 3 Likes |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Missmossy(f): 4:09pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Submissiveness,humility,patience,tolerance,commitment and some other indispensable virtues. Its very possible to be in love with a spouse who possess this enviable characteristics. 1 Like |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Sallotti: 4:19pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Both! Where one is weak. . .the other gets stronger! So, what was the argument about? Shioooooooooooor! |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 4:58pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
I'm yet to comprehend why Nl people think Love is the least factor in successful marriage, why marry someone you're not in love with in first place, I believe love cheer one up during those conflicts and trial times. Or else one can simply walk away without the strong emotional attachment -Love. Love's got everything to do with it. My opinion please OP both. Marriage is a commitment/ promise to love till eternity. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 5:01pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Both is needed. If love is no longer there, the marriage may work based on commitment but this case it will be suffering and smiling kind of marriage. Typical to plenty Nigerians |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Tolexander: 5:12pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
I don't know about your options. What makes marriage works to me is very simple; husband, love your wife! Wife, respect and be submissive to your husband! if the couple can do the two, the marriage will work more than otapiapia for rat! |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by ZeinabBadawi: 6:22pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Tolexander: 7:04pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Zeinab Badawi:na wetin do your mouth? |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 7:20pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Tolexander: na wetin do your mouth? Sideways , Zenab come explain yasef oh. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 7:32pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Option B but can one really commit without love ? i don't think I can. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 9:13pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
[color=#000099][/color] How can a person commit without love? True love is all that is needed to make a marriage work. P.S.: love is not an emotion |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 9:15pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
@bukatyne, care to explain the 'love is not an emotion' part? |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by damiso(f): 9:18pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Both...You need to commit to loving this person even with their flaws. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 9:25pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
bukatyne: [color=#000099][/color] How can a person commit without love? Smart girl. I think people are wrongly defining love. If you love someone, you will be committed to that person. An example is mother and child relationship, even though it is a different kinda love, but it is an example of how love shows commitment. Most people believe love is the physical attraction, and I agree that wears away after a few years. But real love includes understanding, commitment, forgiveness, humility, respect everything needed for a marriage to work. So I say love is the key but not the physical attraction type of love only. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Olugbenger(m): 9:53pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
I don't know much but money certainly should be considered. 1 Like |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 9:54pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
alutacontinua: @bukatyne, care to explain the 'love is not an emotion' part? Read 1Cor 13: 1 - 8 on what love means/ entails |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Matthewbriggs(m): 9:55pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Thanks for your contribution. Moreover this is what i told him. I said. Love is needed for marriage to take place in the first place but for it to work it take commiment. reason been that. >>Love is not a enough. You can love some one so much and still cheat, hurt the person, quarell and do nasty things. >> Also love sometimes can fade away when we get lazy and fail to do the work needed to make the mariage work... hence the need for commiment. Commimemnt means knowing that I love this person, we shall face challenges, but I will do my best and work hard to make this work, for better for worse. I told him love brings commiment but what sustains commiment is commiment. When love is weak commitment can hold the marriage. comiment is a concious decision not an emotional decision. ... |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 9:59pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Expect there are kinds of love, you cannot love a person and cheat on him/ her. Sweetlemon in one thread nailed it. The last thing you want to do to someone you love is hurt him or her Maybe you are mixing love with emotions Matthew briggs: Thanks for your contribution. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 10:00pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Nashville: |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 10:03pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
bukatyne: More like infatuation! |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 10:03pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
bukatyne: The love that we talk about btw partners is not the one in 1Cor 13! It goes beyond that, yes, it's all of 1Cor 13 plus a mix of the emotional constituent! I love evrybody arnd me, and yes, I mean everybody, even my enemies with the love of 1 Cor:13! That is what is expected of me as a believer with love as a fruit of the Spirit! But do you expect me to love my enemy and my husband the same way I'm guessing no! Do i love my husband the way 1 Cor. 13 puts it, absolutely yes! However, there's an emotional part to it that makes that love transcend the general love i'm expected to have to everyone arnd me. The same also applies to ur 'brethren submitting to one another' concept but let's talk about 'love' now and leave the submission part! |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 10:30pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
people go into marriage for different reasons. if the marriage we are talking about here is primarily based on love, then commitment plays a very vital role in such a marriage because commitment is an element that strengthens love (which is the foundation of the marriage). so it can be said that love and commitment work hand in hand in making a marriage which is based on love work. while in other marriages such as contract marriage, all you need do is to stay committed to the terms and conditions of the contract. no love needed. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Matthewbriggs(m): 10:32pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
bukatyne: Expect there are kinds of love, you cannot love a person and cheat on him/ her. Sweetlemon in one thread nailed it The last thing you want to do to someone you love is hurt him or her @bolded I agree to your statement but also understand that no man or woman is infallible and as humans we make mistakes ...and hurt even those we love dearly due to several factors like ego, incorrect judgements, moments of weakneass, moments when our love is going through fire etc. EG: I love my mum so much but some timea i piss her off to the extent she threathens to disown me, but i know she loves me to pieces like I do love her No matter what I am commited to making my relationship with her work because she is my mum. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 10:40pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
alutacontinua: There is only one type of love which manifests in different ways. If marital love = I cor 13: 1 - 8 + sex.ual emotions, then you will agree that true love is all that is needed to make a marriage work |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by bukatyne(f): 10:44pm On Dec 27, 2013 |
Matthew briggs: |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by God2man(m): 6:03am On Dec 28, 2013 |
Proverb 24:3-4 " Through wisdom is an house builded and by understanding it is established: And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches." Love may be enough if there is agape love or divine love, but wisdom, knowledge and understanding coupled with an unconditional love are highly recomended for a successful marriage. It is possible to love somebody without having any clue about how to live with the person. I love you, i love you, i love you. Easy to say, what about committing those words into practice, it is difficult, it takes a great deal of knowledge to live together with somebody without any problem. I believe what we call agape love or divine love is scarce, what we see around us are infatuation, emotional, love at first sight, and so on. Love is not enough. Knowledge is not enough too, i think we need the two. God bless you. God2man. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Nobody: 6:10am On Dec 28, 2013 |
^^ wow it's been forever God2man, where have you been? Great post. |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Yeske: 2:08pm On Dec 28, 2013 |
Both. I will choose commitment over love though. But I still believe it goes beyond both. There could be commitment without happiness, I don't know the word to use for it. Like staying together not because you are still in love or still committed but because you don't want to disappoint some person (s). I don't think I made any sense. I have to stop. 1 Like |
Re: What Makes A Mariage Work ? by Wislet(f): 10:37am On Dec 29, 2013 |
Matthew briggs: Thanks for your contribution.I beg to contradict here. You CANNOT 'Love' someone and still cheat on them or cause them hurt. We attribute 'love' to the flutter of the heart- that fluttery feeling we get ehen we think of/remember that person. That is NOT love. Love is far deeper than that. Read how the BIBLE defines Love. Now, that is what Love IS. You cannot practice those and cheat on a person, treat them bad, etc. We need to understand and know what the word means in the first place. And NO, LOVE NEVER DIMINISHES OVER TIME. Has Christ's love for you ever diminished in spite of the imperfect man you are?? Bottomline: let us all first of all UNDERSTAND what Love means. It is not a flutter of the heart- that is farthest from the meaning. |
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