Fathers to Daughters and Mothers to Son. Why is this?

Sometimes I can't help observing this trend in most homes where the fathers love their baby girls more than the males and the mothers won't joke with their baby boys either. I've seen girls who will always say, "my dad this and my dad that" but only make mention of their mom once a while. On the other hand, the guys will say, "my mom this and that".

So I ask this amiable forumites, why is this so?

Hum, very interesting question.  I, too, have noticed this and so far this is all I came up with:

There may be something ingrained in us that helps us realize that girls, although loved by their mother, need a fathers care.  They need the love and affection from their fathers because in due time, that’s what they will look for in a mate.  Girls learn how they should be loved by their fathers but learn how to be women from their mothers.

Males, on the other hand, are conditioned to become men by their fathers but are shown extra love an affection from their mothers. This is in hopes of showing them the other side of life, i.e. love, sensitivity, nurturing, et cetera.  Males do not get this from other males, but from females.  It teaches them how to relate to a woman.

That’s just my philosophy on the matter

I believe fathers (being males) knows how 'fragile' the girl child is. Its probably a sense of insecurity in the father's subconscious. They want to be the first man in their girls life and probably groom her well so she wont fall prey to the "devourers".

Sons cling to their mothers mostly because fathers are a bit harsh with male kids. So they get lots of love from their mothers.

I think its the fathers that cling to the girls and its the sons that cling unto their mothers (and not really vice versa).

But at times its just the joy that the opposite sex came out of you. Also remember "unlikes attracts"

It's as easy as "opposite attract". It just happens.

As a female, there r some things you can get pass off through your dad. Like telling him the price of pad is 100 dollar. But your mom knows the price and she'll totaly hunt you down. I have no much explaination to this. But i know it just happens. Daddy's rock! You guys should try get closer to them.

i know what dat's like. my dad's girl is my lil sister. i'm a girl too but dont get as much attention as she does. i'm sure if he could buy her the moon, he would.

i guess that's where the whole "daddy's girl" and "mama's boy" originated from.

"Different strokes for different folks" as it goes. I would want more people to give us their own view about this topic. I would like to tell us what someone a bit older than me once said about this topic. Below is his own view.

"I think the reason is simply because when the girl starts getting admired by the opposite sex out there, she needs a representative of that particular sex who'ld understand her and their's no other person other than the father. She feels if she needed something and the boy or probably her boyfriend cannot afford it, she then goes back to his representative in the home who in this case is her father. The same thing also applies to the boys"

That's the way he sees it but.....more pls.

It's Called the Oedipus Complex.

fathers luv their daughters more because of the guilt they feel concerning their attitude to women or their wives/girlfriends.
and vise versea for mothers.

peace and luv to all!

Fathers and Sons compete for male roles and the attention of the mother. Girls fight for attention from their fathers and are jealous of their mothers, causing conflict.

Are you sure the guyz or gilrs are conscious of this competition ?

I doubt that, Layi. I think it's subconscious.

It's natural for men to compete with eachother, but it's usually healthy competition. Boys look up to their fathers, but also compete with them as the alpha-male of the household. This is a natural and subconscious response. Boys feel less threatened by their mothers and so are more apt to share more with their mothers, especially in the area of feelings. This makes mothers and Sons closer than Fathers and Sons. The same goes with bringing Fathers and Daughters closer together. It is not that Mothers like their Sons better, only that they have a more natural chemistry.

HOPE THIS HELPS!

Really interesting,

@laura, what do you mean by "Oedipus Complex."

"The Oedipus complex is a concept developed by Sigmund Freud... to explain the maturation of the infant boy through identification with the father and desire for the mother.

It is based on the Greek myth of Oedipus who kills his father Laius and marries his mother Jocasta. The Oedipus conflict or Oedipus complex was described as a state of psychosexual development and awareness first occurring around the age of 5 and a half years (taken from Wikipedia)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oedipus_complex

Freud was a very controversial psychiatrist who came up with all kinds of intreresting theories on why kids turn out with different personalities. Sometimes unbelievable, always interesting...

I think it is more a function of society pressure.

Father's face a lot of responsibility especially when it comes to the raising of sons. It is expected that the father will disciple the boy and show him what is means to be a "man". Also, society expects guys to be "manly" and dads also tend to pass on that expectation to their sons. Dad's also would want their sons to succeed them - not neccessarily by taking over the family business, but propagating the family name and also being able to say - that's my son.

Same thing applies to girls. Female children in our society are to be raised by the mother who will teach them "womanly" ways. While different in the way men express it, girls too have standards to which their mothers compare and hold them to.

Still, both parents love their children alot. But boys quickly learn that mother is more forgiving of them (she sees the role of disciplining the boy as the father's) and vice-versa, girls learn that they can get away with more with daddy.

@kamakula
Since mothers are forgiving and girls are loved by their Dad, who then disciplines them (girls). Abi girls no need correction?

Huh?

Let me quote myself:

kamakula:

While different in the way men express it, girls too have standards to which their mothers compare and hold them to.

But boys quickly learn that mother is more forgiving of them (she sees the role of disciplining the boy as the father's) and vice-versa, girls learn that they can get away with more with daddy.

So, according to that, I said boys learn that mother is more forgiving of them (than dad who disciplines them) and girls learn they can get away with more with daddy (than mom who will chastize them).

Did I answer your question or did I totally miss your point?

I think Kamakula really got it. If boys are getting more discipline from their fathers of course they would connect more to their mothers, who will be less critical of their feelings. Woman should never be afraid to be affectionate to their boys so they don't "get soft"

Hum, I was heavily disciplined by my father, yet I'm still a "Daddy's Girl"

I agree with mothers must show love to sons but I have come across those who've gotten a bit much and are now considered "Momma's Boys" but not in a good way

Momma's boys come when the mothers do not let go, not when they give them to much love. I know I am dating one! She calls every morning!

I completely understand, Laura. I've dated one in the past and I couldn't handle it! It felt like he was in a realtionship with 2 women (me and his mother)!

my first roomate's mom used to call him for 2-4 hours every night during our first quarter of school. I wouldn't call him a mama's boy. . .

You're right but it takes more than that to be qualified as a "Momma's Boy" which can be a whole thread on it's own

is that an invitation?

I love Mama's Boys. Not like a mama mama boy. I mean a boy that cherishes his mom. Not a boy that calls him mom before he says "i love you", or asks his mama if he should say "yes" after i asked him if he'd love to dance.

@kamakula: If you start it, I'll post in it. . . as always

vexxy:

................. It felt like he was in a realtionship with 2 women (me and his mother)!

But he actually is. In fact every man is.
Methinks the strenght of a man is not how easy it is for him to ditch his momma after wedding but how well he keeps/manages them both and every1 lives happily. Its possible.
Though its a fact that some mothers are bad (possesive). They don't want to cut that virtual umblical cord and let the guy go. Then Its the job of the man to put his mom to order.

Wives...y'all going to be mothers someday o.

Back to the topic.

@kamakula
U answered the question. But i thot the father are usually disciplinary executive and the mother shows the love in ever house.

It has something to do with Oedipal complex

not all fathers

The father knows the dangers ahead. He tries to keep her away from the wolves in man skins.

I THINK ITS NATURE,

THATS EXACTLY WHAT GOES ON IN MY HOME.

mY HUSBAND TENDS TO LOVE OUR BABY GIRL MORE THAN HIS BROTHER, HE HIS ALWAYS CONCIOUS AND KEEP SAYING I HAVE TO PROTECT HER FROM BOYS AS SHE IS GROWING AND PROVIDE EVERYTHING SHE NEEDS.
ON THE OTHER HAND, HE HIS SO STRICT WITH THE BOY, WELL WE ARE BOTH MAN IN THIS HOUSE, BUT THIS IS MY HOUSE SO FOLLOW THE RULES, MY SON IS SO MUCH ATTACH TO ME THAT HE CAN CALL MUMMY 100TIMES IN A SECONDS.

I JUST BELIEVE ITS A NATURAL PHENOMENON OF OPPOSITE SEX ATTRACTS AND SAME SEX REPEL.

I LOVE THE TWO OF THEM, BUT THE GIRL IS DADDY GIRL, AND THE BOY IS MUMMY BOY.

iSNT IT FUNNY,

IS THERE ANYTHING WE CAN DO ABOUT IT?
I REALLY WANT TO KNOW.

Not all mothers