Everyone gets angry and mild anger can sometimes
be useful to express strong feelings and deal with
situations. Anger is an emotional state that varies in
intensity from mild irritation to intense furry and
rage which can be caused by both external and
internal events. It is often associated with
frustration, disappointment, worry, embarrassment,
misunderstanding or disagreements.

TIPS TO CALMIN DOWN

TAKE A DEEP BREATH
Control your internal, physical responses to anger.
Likely, your heart rate is increased, your breathing
is rapid or your voice is raised. The first step to inner
control is to breathe deeply. Breathing deeply allows
your body to be filled with oxygen. This will stop the
adrenaline rush that floods your body when you are
angry. This extra oxygen flow will relax your body,
calm your breathing, slow your heart rate and allow
your brain to resume rational thought. While
breathing deeply, you may repeat a calm word or
phrase such as "relax" or "take it easy".

REALITY CHECK
When you start getting upset about something, take
a moment to think about the situation. Ask yourself:
Is it worth getting angry about?, Is it wort ruining
the rest of my day? Is my response appropriate to
the situation? Is taking action worth my time? By
the time you think over these questions, you would
have decided what the most appropriate response to
the provoking situation should be.

SLOWLY COUNT TO TEN
Distract yourself from the provoking situation and
focus your attention on counting from 1-10 to let
your rational mind catch up with your feelings. If
you still feel out of control by the time you reach 10,
start counting again.

LISTEN TO MUSIC
Music helps in the healing process. Each time you
sense that something is provoking you, to avoid
doing anything that you will later regret, you can
distract yourself from the situation with a soothing
music.

TAKE A WALK
If your anger is getting out of control, remove
yourself from the situation for some minutes or for
as long as it takes you to calm down. A trip to the
gym or a completely neutral environment should
help you calm down. During the time out, plan how
you are going to stay calm when you return.

IDENTIFY WHAT IS REALLY UPSETTING YOU
Have you ever gotten into an argument over
something silly? Big fights often happen over
something small but there is usually a bigger issue
behind it. If you find your irritations rapidly rising,
ask yourself " What am I really angry about?
Identifying the real source of frustration will help
you take constructive action and work towards a
resolution.

WRITE IT DOWN
Sometimes it can help to write things down. What's
happening in your life? Are you experiencing
frustrations? Frustration has been found to be a
major cause of aggression, people who are
frustrated tend to be more aggressive, even over
insignificant things. Writing about these issues can
sometimes help you give perspective and help you
understand your feelings. Work out some options for
changing your situation.

The emotion of anger is perfectly normal especially when you have been mistreated or wronged. The feeling is not a problem, its what you do with it that makes a difference. Anger becomes a problem when it harms you or others. Anger is not something you have to let out in an aggressive way in order to avoid blowing up. You cant always control the situation you are in or how it makes you feel, but you can control how you express your anger.
If you have a hot-temper, you may feel like its out of your hands and there is little you can do about it. Mastering the art of anger management takes work, but the more you practice, the easier it will get.

Feel free to ask questions about your unique experience of anger. Let's rub minds together on how you can improve on anger management.

pappyrose:
Feel free to ask questions about your unique experience of anger. Let's rub minds together on how you can improve on anger management.

Dear anger counsellor,

I felt angry wen a female friend I av not met but have huge attraction 4 told me her bf is cumin to visit her, in an instant I felt angry n cudnt decipher d reason I was angry, wat do u tink was d reason, how do I kip talkin to my female "friend" n not tink abt her bf cumin around her?
How do I control dis anger? I don't even want her to knw I felt angry.

N:B I don't knw if she has same feelins I av for her. She is an angel in human form.

Henrypraise:


Dear anger counsellor,

I felt angry wen a female friend I av not met but have huge attraction 4 told me her bf is cumin to visit her, in an instant I felt angry n cudnt decipher d reason I was angry, wat do u tink was d reason, how do I kip talkin to my female "friend" n not tink abt her bf cumin around her?
How do I control dis anger? I don't even want her to knw I felt angry.

N:B I don't knw if she has same feelins I av for her. She is an angel in human form.

Smiling as I read thru ur post.
I think u r only jealous (which is natural) and not necessarily angry. Since u know she has a relationship she's very committed to,U need to do reality check.
REALITY CHECK
When you start getting upset about something, take
a moment to think about the situation. Ask yourself:
Is it worth getting angry about?, Is it wort ruining
the rest of my day? Is my response appropriate to
the situation? Is taking action worth my time? By
the time you think over these questions, you would
have decided what the most appropriate response
to the provoking situation should be.

pappyrose:


Smiling as I read thru ur post.
I think u r only jealous (which is natural) and not necessarily angry. Since u know she has a relationship she's very committed to,U need to do reality check.
REALITY CHECK
When you start getting upset about something, take
a moment to think about the situation. Ask yourself:
Is it worth getting angry about?, Is it wort ruining
the rest of my day? Is my response appropriate to
the situation? Is taking action worth my time? By
the time you think over these questions, you would
have decided what the most appropriate response
to the provoking situation should be.

Nice, I will do just as said abt d reality check. I am gonna post d feedbak/ out cum as tym progresses