divalishis:

I didn't ask How lectures were going. If he wanted to Read in the library I'd accuse him of seeing other girls Since he would tell me he couldn't pick my calls in the library.

We would argue and bicker before exams and sometimes spend the night talking it out and exams were the next day. To Please me, he didn't keep late nights Since all I accused him of was cheating.

He would tell me I was hurting him, wasn't allowing him concentrate. But I continued.

At this point, he was doing the final corrections to his thesis. He was supposed to have finished But his new busy job delayed him.

divalishis: I started dating this guy x years ago. A couple of months into the relationship, he told me he wanted to further his studies. Well, I wasn't in full support. And a short while latter after he started fully, I became very insecure as it was a long distance relationship.

I didn't ask How lectures were going. If he wanted to Read in the library I'd accuse him of seeing other girls Since he would tell me he couldn't pick my calls in the library.

We would argue and bicker before exams and sometimes spend the night talking it out and exams were the next day. To Please me, he didn't keep late nights Since all I accused him of was cheating.

He would tell me I was hurting him, wasn't allowing him concentrate. But I continued.

I guess it became too much as after a particularly serious fight, he told me it was over. I thought it was business as usual until I saw he wouldn't pick my calls or talk to me.

Days stretched into months, months into a year. Two.
All my attempts at reconciliation were rebuffed.


Then I got a breakthrough. He gave us another chance. Things have been going on well as we have both matured and i know never to act like i used to.

At this point, he was doing the final corrections to his thesis. He was supposed to have finished But his new busy job delayed him.

I saw the final draft and noticed he omitted my name from the acknowledgment, even though we were back together. He thanked his profs, his family, his friends, his roommates. He mentioned people by their name. Even those that did minor favours for him, he mentioned. But mine is nowhere to be found.

Am I justified to feel so sad, angry even. Considering the fact that we are getting married, don't I deserve a mention? He made a distinction in his thesis and it hurts that he doesn't see me as one of those who went with him on that academic journey. Has he even truly forgiven me?

divalishis: @aisha
I support him. I didn't know better then But I do now.
He has been talking of quitting his job which put him in interaction with scores of people everyday, where he can even meet finer girls, But I give him the encourage he needs to hold on.
I encourage him everyday, Because his work is both tasking and time consuming.
You shouldn't sound so angry and mad. If the person involved could walk past all that, to a certain extent, then who are you to judge me so harshly? After all, nobody is perfect. And he saw some good in me to have come back....

divalishis: @aisha
I support him. I didn't know better then But I do now.
He has been talking of quitting his job which put him in interaction with scores of people everyday, where he can even meet finer girls, But I give him the encourage he needs to hold on.

I encourage him everyday, Because his work is both tasking and time consuming.

You shouldn't sound so angry and mad. If the person involved could walk past all that, to a certain extent, then who are you to judge me so harshly? After all, nobody is perfect. And he saw some good in me to have come back....

andromida: I feel its ok to expect him to acknowledge you afterall you've been there from inception and inspite of your past differences you guys are good now.

It seems you are afraid if you bring it up you will look like you are falling into your old pattern of being insecure but this is your husband to be and you may be suprised it was an oversight on his part. Instead of stuffing it down,turning it over and over in your mind,analysing his action till it breeds resentment in your heart,talk to him in a way that does not sound like a demand or an accusation.

Oversight?! Huh?

MizMyColi: Leh me not lie, if I were in her shoes, it'd hurt whether or not I contributed as immensely. [You can't possibly call me insecure] That said, keep loving him and expect nothing in return. It might be mentally tasking, but you'll be fine. Don't even mention it to Him, keep on working on yourself and keep loving the woman that you're becoming whether or not he validates you.

divalishis: I started dating this guy x years ago. A couple of months into the relationship, he told me he wanted to further his studies. Well, I wasn't in full support. And a short while latter after he started fully, I became very insecure as it was a long distance relationship.

I didn't ask How lectures were going. If he wanted to Read in the library I'd accuse him of seeing other girls Since he would tell me he couldn't pick my calls in the library.

We would argue and bicker before exams and sometimes spend the night talking it out and exams were the next day. To Please me, he didn't keep late nights Since all I accused him of was cheating.

He would tell me I was hurting him, wasn't allowing him concentrate. BUT I CONTINUED.

I guess it became too much as after a particularly serious fight, he told me it was over. I thought it was business as usual until I saw he wouldn't pick my calls or talk to me.

chaircover:


Honestly I would be hurt too . . .
But deep in me, if I tell my self the truth, I will know that I had caused most of it

crackhaus:
Lady I won't even sugarcoat anything, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE ACKNOWLEDGED.

If you seriously believe in your heart that you should have been mentioned on his acknowledgment page, then insecurity is the least of your problem...Try working on your delusional disorder (grandiose-type) as well, it's a psychological problem...Google it!

Kanwulia: It is okay to feel hurt.
You don't have to win all the time.
Take it as a punishment for YOUR bad behavior in the past.
You have 2 options.

1. Ask him why your name was omitted for he may not have thought about it.
2. Let him be. It might be a test. Some battles are not worth fighting and everything does not have to be about YOU!

Ceasar1: Let's be honesty here, You deserve an acknowledgment. It doesn't matter what you did to him but as partners now, he ought to acknowledge you as a pillar of support in one way or the other.

#BTW, I don't know why some peeps here vent their frustrated life's in their comments. Give it a rest jeez!

MizMyColi:

MizMyColi: ^^^ True, That. But then, even when you've told yourself that truth, you'd still think in the lines of "But, even at that......."

MizMyColi: Oversight?! Huh?

Chillisauce: How can he acknowledge you when you weren't there to support him
Two things .
Forget about it since you do not merit it
Or gently type in your name into the draft. No be you hold the draft?
You see, problem solved.

chaircover:

Maybe, but the feeling of hurt wont be as intense as when I first found out.

When things dont go to plan, its always good to take time and evaluate things. Sometimes on first look, we think we are right, but when we think deeper, we realise that we are not 100% blameless

How would he have felt or what would have happened if he had failed exams due to his not being in the right state of mind, because he spent the night before sorting out arguments with the op

aisha2: Go and work on your insecurity before you commit murder suicide one day.

Why should he acknowledge you? Aknowledgement is for those who SUPPORTED him you didnt support him, left to you he would have failed, you wont let him read or attend lectures in peace why then do you think you deserve a mention?
You are not in love but obsessed, when he wants to travel on official trips am sure you will raise hell, when he stays in same hotel with colleagues I doubt you will let him sleep with monitoring calls.

Are you jobless or just a monitoring spirit?

andromida:

Yeah oversight. I've made that kind of mistake before in my case it was with a very close friend who had been really helpful. When she saw it she simply said I can't see my name here and I felt so baaad. I apologised she was very forgiving.

Imagine if she had said nothing and came up with stories in her head she would have started acting out.

In this case i know there is a precedence of insecure behavior on her part but if he had not forgiven her he would not have come back and since they got back I imagine she has been doing her best to be supportive of him.

She should ask to know so she can forgive,forget and move on in peace not just assume that he still has beef with her and if he says he does not feel her name should be there then she knows this is one of those instances she is not winning but atleast she knows.

aisha2:
My sister, me I was even thinking I was over reacting but I put myself in the guys shoe just imagine.
Poster, I said it before work on yourself, the more I read the more I notice:
1. You feel entitled to certain things not caring how the other person feels. (Why wouldnt he acknowledge me even though I was unsupportive but still he should have acknowledged me)
2. You feel justified ( He must have seen something good in me to come back)
3. You dont seem to understand clearly when you are wrong and keep pushing other peoples buttons even when they say stop (I felt it was business as usual till he stopped picking my calls)
We all learn and grow, but one cannot learn till they open their minds and hearts to the wants and needs of others.
Am sorry if you think you are justified in getting upset over something you clearly didnt earn then you still havent learned.
You are NOT entitled to benefits, You EARN them, this you didnt earn, work hard next time and earn an acknowledgement, its not automatic