Yes, a guy works for 5 yrs or less and decides I will (must) marry this year. He proposes to his gf (or one of), moves on and conclude marriage process within a short period. Where he has no gf he can move to his village, announce his intention, his mother and aunts move to work and marriage is concluded within months. Sometimes a guy comes frm nowhere (Overseas, no offense) goes to his village and conclude every thing within weeks. Some of the ceremonies may even be done in his absence with his PORTRAIT placed to represent him during trad. My question is why can't a lady initiate and conclude marriage thro any of the above processes. I want to hear from my village that the daughter of Chief Ojo returned frm USA with Bsc. Msc, and is looking for eligible man for marriage. Don't u think it will make the marriage 'market' more open and transparent, with a lot of willing buyers (offer) and sellers (acceptance). I'm worried b/c our girls are suffering in silence. Let us break the taboo? What is ur opinion?

In this part of Africa, it is not proper for a lady to such things you mentioned above because of marriage. For instance do you expect a lady to pay her own bride prize etc Neva
A lady must wait the right man to do the needful or else, no man will take her serious.

A time will come, ladies won't take it anymore, by then I will go to my village and wait for the likes of chief ojo's daughter with PHd and accept her hand in marriage.
*wakes up from dream*

Like a lady asking a guy out? op, maybe with time sha.

egopersonified: Like a lady asking a guy out? op, maybe with time sha.

Hmmm last night was the bomb. You didnt want me to stop sucking your boobs

Marriage has turned into a flea market abi

Kidding rite? How can ladies do dat, imagine a woman u dont knw walk up to n start toasting u,u no go run? Which a man can certainly do if he is been extreme,i mean if he rilly need to get marry dat year. Any lady dat try dat will be judiciously dupe of her affluence, body n later dumped. D most a lady in such case can do is to be friendly in a sexy way to d involved guy

PARTLY because she is not the one to hook up her self,she is not the one to det when its time,only the men have the authority to decide when they want to hook up ,the women only wait for the ready-appointed man to show up

egopersonified, Pls what did you do this guy that keeps stalking you, trolling and harrasing you with lewd comments?

Mondisweets: Marriage has turned into a flea market abi

do you really understand the ops question?



op its possible, but you know the way 'some' of our african people think, i can imagine 'some' ladies wouldnt mind sponsoring/contributing to their own wedding if they are better off, but there are 'some' men who find it awkward

shizzle11: egopersonified, Pls what did you do this guy that keeps stalking you, trolling and harrasing you with lewd comments?

I just gave him a piece of what he dishes out, thats why he is crying all over nl. The thing pain am die.

shizzle11: egopersonified, Pls what did you do this guy that keeps stalking you, trolling and harrasing you with lewd comments?

I swear d dude is so annoying... I just like d way she ignores him

New comer. You registerd on Aug 14 2014. dont put mouth in the matter.

blessedqueen:

I swear d dude is so annoying... I just like d way she ignores him

egopersonified:

I just gave him a piece of what he dishes out, thats why he is crying all over nl. The thing pain am die.

I hope he gets banned because this is just unbelievable. Its good you've been ignoring him.

I think that women, for one reason or another, are more eager to get married and more afraid not to get married "on time".

I also think that a rich babe from overseas can marry a "poor" boy quickly but women are not so eager to buy themselves a husband.

letsdothis: New comer. You registerd on Aug 14 2014. dont put mouth in the matter.

Olodo like u... This is my third handle.

egopersonified:

I just gave him a piece of what he dishes out, thats why he is crying all over nl. The thing pain am die.

lol, i see...just keep your finger on the ignore button

blessedqueen:
I swear d dude is so annoying... I just like d way she ignores him

yeaah, that's the best trick for such trolls

carefreewannabe: I think that women, for one reason or another, are more eager to get married and more afraid not to get married "on time".

I also think that a rich babe from overseas can marry a "poor" boy quickly but women are not so eager to buy themselves a husband.

In other words , men that have been financing their weddings have been buying you girls abi? You kidding right?

shizzle11: In other words , men that have been financing their weddings have been buying you girls abi? You kidding right?

This is not what I said.

carefreewannabe:

This is not what I said.

That was what you implied or better still, explain the context 'buy', as used in your submission

shizzle11: That was what you implied or better still, explain the context 'buy', as used in your submission

Oh, come on.

When a man from abroad asks his mother and aunts to find a wife for him and even marries her without being present AT HIS OWN wedding, what do you think is involved, love

Or when a man comes from abroad and he and the woman, he barely knows, marry, what do you think is involved, love?

Because it is a BUSH AFRICAN WOMAN'S WORLD!

changing the goal post....smh

carefreewannabe:

Oh, come on.

When a man from abroad asks his mother and aunts to find a wife for him and even marries her without being present AT HIS OWN wedding, what do you think is involved, love

Not exactly. if he is never married before, he could get to love her with time

Or when a man comes from abroad and he and the woman, he barely knows, marry, what do you think is involved, love?

same as above, if he has genuine intentions the likeness 'could' blossom to love. On the other hand it could wither, it could go either way.

So are you saying a woman cannot desire a man she doesn't know too well? Dont forget life in itself is a risk, and i believe thats the intention of the op, to get an idea why women don't dare such risks as opposed to men?

Lastly you used the word 'buy' which necessitated my quoting you to start with, which i consider totally wrong. So i ask again, are men who have been marrying in this way been 'buying' the 'girls' as you put it?

shizzle11: Not exactly. if he is never married before, he could get to love her with time

same as above, if he has genuine intentions the likeness 'could' blossom to love. On the other hand it could wither, it can go bother ways.

So are you saying a woman cannot desire a man she doesn't know too well? Dont forget life in itself is a risk, so?

It would try to minimize the risk before signing a life long contract, wouldn't you?

carefreewannabe:

It would try to minimize the risk before signing a life long contract, wouldn't you?

personally i would like to know a bit about my spouse to be before proposing, but the situation for the men who do this is different from mine, eg where they live, distance etc.

shizzle11: personally i would like to know a bit about my spouse to be before proposing, but the situation for the men who do this could be different from mine, distance etc.

I don't understand why someone would marry a stranger but this is not my problem.

I am located in Europe and I see what happens when men marry strangers at home. They come back and live like the marriage never took place.

carefreewannabe:

I don't understand why someone would marry a stranger but this is not my problem.

I am located in Europe and I see what happens when men marry strangers at home. They come back and live like the marriage never took place.

carefree i know you reside in Angela Merkels Deutschland, and I am not oblivious of what you stated above, as a matter of fact i know a couple of people involved. Most of the marriages are not first time marriages and are on condition, i know, but i think the op didn't look at it from this perspective, he is just curious to know if ladies who feel the need for a Nigerian husband can take such bold step.

Its 17mins to 6am in naija, good morning

shizzle11: carefree i know you reside in Angela Merkels Deutschland, and I am not oblivious of what you stated above, as a matter of fact i know a couple of people involved. Most of the marriages are not first time marriages and are on condition, i know, but i think the op didn't look at it from this perspective, he is just curious to know if ladies who feel the need for a Nigerian husband can take such bold step.

Its 17mins to 6am in naija, good morning

It's almost 7 here. Thanks for your company at breakfast. I need to get ready now.

carefreewannabe:

It's almost 7 here. Thanks for your company at breakfast. I need to get ready now.

Have a very nice day

shizzle11: Have a very nice day

Thank you

Wish you the same.

carefreewannabe:

Thank you

Wish you the same.

My pleasure

Thanks too