Sagamite:


What is a marriage rite? Why is it necessary?
Why don't you see polygamy and taking your husband surname as a "rite" too?
Abi your culture never had those?

Polygamy isn't compulsory, there's no law in my culture that says, 'a man must have more than one wife'.

Chiamaka01:


Polygamy isn't compulsory, there's no law in my culture that says, 'a man must have more than one wife'.

It is not compulsory but there is a law banning it?

Sagamite:


It is not compulsory but there is a law banning it?

No, you're not making any sense, paying the bride-price is compulsory if you want to get married according to traditional customs, but polygamy isn't, so there.

Chiamaka01:


No, you're not making any sense, paying the bride-price is compulsory if you want to get married according to traditional customs, but polygamy isn't, so there.

Oh, so because the bride-price is compulsory, you insist he has to pay that but you are not being sold?

Please make sense and tell me whether your traditional customs does not make it compulsory:

- for you to submit to your husband and be inferior in the relationship (like submit to his wish of a second wife)

- for you to obey him and let him make the decisions (like what name you take)

- for you to be a virgin upon marriage, and if you are not, you have to confess to your mother-in-law and other of your husband's female family members who all your previous sexual partners are.

- for you to be indirectly married to his family, not just him.

If so, how come you are not planning to do those or how come you are not insisting on those?

Please make sense when you respond.

[quote
author=Sagamite post=28393870]

Oh, so because the bride-price is compulsory, you insist he has to pay
that but you are not being sold?

Please make sense and tell me whether your traditional customs does not
make it compulsory:

- for you to submit to your husband and be inferior in the relationship
(like submit to his wish of a second wife)

- for you to obey him and let him make the decisions (like what name you
take)
- for you to be a virgin upon marriage, and if you are not, you have to
confess to your mother-in-law and other of your husband's female family
members who all your previous sexual partners are.
- for you to be indirectly married to his family, not just him.
If so, how come you are not planning to do those or how come you are not
insisting on those?
Please make sense when you respond.[/quote]

No, what part of Nigeria are you from? I know some cultures in Nigeria still have those practices, but not mine.

Chiamaka01:


No, what part of Nigeria are you from? I know some cultures in Nigeria still have those practices, but not mine.

Did you not say you are from Edo?

What tribe are you and which tribe in Edo does not practice that culture?

Sagamite:


Did you not say you are from Edo?
What tribe are you and which tribe in Edo does not practice that culture?

I'm Bini and i've never heard of that. I don't know of other tribes, though. The most ridiculous is being indirectly married to the family.

Chiamaka01:


I'm Bini and i've never heard of that. I don't know of other tribes, though. The most ridiculous is being indirectly married to the family.

So you telling us that in Bini traditional customs:

- You are not suppose to submit to your husband and be inferior in the relationship

- You are not expected to obey him and let him make the decisions

- You are not expected to be a virgin upon marriage, and if you are not, you have to confess to your mother-in-law and other of your husband's female family members who all your previous sexual partners are.

- Your families are not automatically married to each other?

It is only paying dowry that is part of the customs?

MissMeiya:


*stare*

Lady, you are clearly crazy. Go and take your meds.

Masonkz don't even reply.

Nonsensical attention-seeker.

and d day came when EfemenaXY over did it without her support system.

[quote
author=Sagamite post=28400482]

So you telling us that in Bini traditional customs:
It is only paying dowry that is part of the customs?[/quote]

Yes, it's only payment of dowry that's part of the wedding customs.

Tufiakwa!

To raise products of 2 or more 'smelling' poohsies dipped by a dirty blokos?
No thanks!

Chiamaka01:


Yes, it's only payment of dowry that's part of the wedding customs.

You are a LIAR!

Sagamite:


You are a LIAR!

No, i'm not. Tell me what constitutes the wedding customs, then.

Chiamaka01:


No, i'm not. Tell me what constitutes the wedding customs, then.

In you customs, all the other things I asked you are part of it.

It is a joke and an insult to everyone's intellect to say only dowry is part of Bini culture.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gm9AObgTA2k

You need to apologise now to everyone reading for such a lame lie.

Sagamite:


In you customs, all the other things I asked you are part of it.

It is a joke and an insult to everyone's intellect to say only dowry is part of Bini culture.

You need to apologise now to everyone reading for such a lame lie.

I now see your problem. Where did i say that? @bolded.

Chiamaka01:


I now see your problem. Where did i say that? @bolded.

So you are saying in Bini customs, a wife is seen and expected to be an equal with her husband?

Sagamite:


So you are saying in Bini customs, a wife is seen and expected to be an equal with her husband?

No, i'm only concerned about the wedding customs. And the wedding is the ceremony, not how i'm expected to live after the ceremony. Whew.

Chiamaka01:


No, i'm only concerned about the wedding customs. And the wedding is the ceremony, not how i'm expected to live after the ceremony. Whew.

Huh?

First of all, you are lying that in the Bini wedding customs, a woman is not expected to be subordinate?

Secondly, how come you are only insisting of following certain wedding customs and not marriage customs?

Sagamite:


Huh?
First of all, you are lying that in the Bini wedding customs, a woman is not expected to be subordinate?
Secondly, how come you are only insisting of following certain wedding customs and not marriage customs?

Osanobua! You said, 'so in Bini customs, a wife is seen as equal to her husband?" and i said "No". Does 'No' have two meanings

Sagamite:

Secondly, how come you are only insisting of following certain wedding customs and not marriage customs?

You don't expect my relatives who are animists to come for a church wedding, do you?

Chiamaka01:


Osanobua! You said, 'so in Bini customs, a wife is seen as equal to her husband?" and i said "No". Does 'No' have two meanings

Ahhh! Lar-ray, so that was what your "No" meant?

Chiamaka01:

You don't expect my relatives who are animists to come for a church wedding, do you?

Why not?

Or, you feel the necessity to follow the "wedding customs", why not go where the customs state the wedding should take place?

[quote
author=Sagamite post=28627389]
Why not?
Or, you feel the necessity to follow the "wedding customs", why not go
where the customs state the wedding should take place?[/quote]

So i'm not free to wed the way i like. It's called being reasonable, there's nothing that'll make me swear in a shrine, so, i have to consider my kinsmen's beliefs, too.

Chiamaka01:


So i'm not free to wed the way i like. It's called being reasonable, there's nothing that'll make me swear in a shrine, so, i have to consider my kinsmen's beliefs, too.

So your reason for asking for a man to buy you is not because of customs as you claimed?

It is because you choose to have and participate in that belief?

Sagamite:


So your reason for asking for a man to buy you is not because of customs as you claimed?

It is because you choose to have and participate in that belief?

What are you saying? Have you heard of the Italian couple who decided to wed in the Igbo traditional way? It was their decision, it does not mean that they decided to live according to the Igbo culture. I have nothing left to say to you.

Chiamaka01:


What are you saying? Have you heard of the Italian couple who decided to wed in the Igbo traditional way? It was their decision, it does not mean that they decided to live according to the Igbo culture. I have nothing left to say to you.

What has this got to do with the fact that you CHOOSE to be bought and it is not binding on you in your custom?

Your friend's theory doesn't make sense. The fact that the man has 2 or 3 wives doesn't stop him from cheating on them all and keeping side chicks or lovers. Same story.