Chiamaka01:


Dealer? Like seriously? You don't see anything denigrating in this comment?

Sorry if it sound so but you are aware that this is what happen in Nigeria, you said it yourself that your father will be the one to collect the bride price and so ofcos he's the one to give you out.

Sorry I'm not denigrating anyone here, I'm just stating the things that happen in Nigeria.

Chiamaka01:


You stylishly told me that since a woman's kinsmen would be paid the
bride-price, her husband will impose his will on her. That the woman has no say since she is being 'sold' from her dad to her hubby.

is it not you that stylish called other women properties? and I pointed out the hypocrisy about your post.

you even said you are human being, so those in polygamous marriage are not humans right?

[quote
author=tintingz post=27293343]
is it not you that stylish called other women properties? and I pointed
out the hypocrisy about your post.

you even said you are human being, so those in polygamous marriage are
not humans right?[/quote]
Yes, i did. Maybe the adjective i used was harsh but i was trying to pass across a message.

Chiamaka01:

Yes, i did. Maybe the adjective i used was harsh but i was trying to pass across a message.

I still don't have any respect for women in polygamous marriages in this modern era and i'll explain why i referred to them as 'property', if you tell me what you think of men in polyandrous marriages. @tintingz

Chiamaka01:


I still don't have any respect for women in polygamous marriages in this modern era and i'll explain why i referred to them as 'property', if you tell me what you think of men in polyandrous marriages. @tintingz

you still blatantly refer to women in polygamous marriages as 'properties' without feeling its denigrating, yet you find it offensive when you are refered to as 'property'. Such hypocrisy....such double standard #sighs

Woman take the wool off your eye first....lol

NB: Make no mistake, i am anti-polygamy

Chiamaka01:


I still don't have any respect for women in polygamous marriages in this modern era and i'll explain why i referred to them as 'property', if you tell me what you think of men in polyandrous marriages. @tintingz

now see who is denigrating... you said women in polygamous marriage are not human but properties?

well these women don't need your respect as some are living happily in their marriage, there are happy polygamous marriage and monogamous marriage doesn't guarantee a happy marriage.

about men in polyandry marriage, these men choose to be in that marriage settings same goes to women in polygyny marriage and if you think they are properties then accept that you are one as well because these women are paid bride price like yours will be paid too, you will even change your maiden name.

through out my posts i didn't denigrate anyone instead you were the denigrating your fellow humans(women), if you read my posts you will see that i am pointing out the hypocrisy in your posts.

NO i won't

Ofcourse, I will consider. Infact, it has been my life long dream. I will like to be the fourth and the youngest of all the wives though.

EfemenaXY:


On the contrary, I am calm.

I suspect he knows her religious background and she's probably Muslim. So if he knows that, then why the very unintelligent question?

What's his hidden Agenda?

that's why he said you were looking for drama,all you need to do is answer the op's harmless question capisce?

tintingz:
I'm raised in polygamous home, I didn't see any hell there.

There are hell in monogamous home too, stop the shii.

The irony part of your post is that we can see women preferring/go into polygamous marriage.

And the irony of your post is that women prefer to be no 2 et al to a already married man

No first wife (there are exceptions though) wants to share he husband with no 2 et al

[quote
author=shizzle11 post=27295246]you still blatantly refer to women in
polygamous marriages as 'properties' without feeling its denigrating,
yet you find it offensive when you are refered to as 'property'. Such
hypocrisy....such double standard #sighs

Woman take the wool off your eye first....lol

NB: Make no mistake, i am anti-polygamy [/quote]

I'm just saying the bitter truth. They're the ones objectifying themselves. Enough derailing.

Tintingz,
I never said that people in polygamous marriages can't be happy. A woman that decides to marry a married man has already objectified herself, i'm just stating the obvious bitter truth.

[quote
author=Chiamaka01 post=27324978]Tintingz,
I never said that people in polygamous marriages can't be happy. A woman
that decides to marry a married man has already objectified herself,
i'm just stating the obvious bitter truth.[/quote]

Lol @i am one too'. I'm not going to go there because that issue has been overflogged. I am not anybody's property. Speak for your four wives, abeg.

I am from a polygamous family and I do like it now. I suppose there might have been problems initially but we the children are now so close , you won't know we have different mums. On if I can be a second wife or if I can accept my husband marry another wife, then I will say it depends on the situation.

Chiamaka01:


Lol @i am one too'. I'm not going to go there because that issue has been overflogged. I am not anybody's property. Speak for your four wives, abeg.

Maybe you will be my forth wife.

tintingz:
Maybe you will be my forth wife.

God forbid. Tufiakwa.

bukatyne:


And the irony of your post is that women prefer to be no 2 et al to a already married man

No first wife (there are exceptions though) wants to share he husband with no 2 et al

some will.

Chiamaka01:


God forbid. Tufiakwa.

That's what you will say.

Different polygamy threads already exist and have been over flogged na! Una no they tire?

missberrypop5:
No, i won't stand sharing my man with a fellow woman. And i wouldn't dare dating a married man talk more of marrying a man who already has a wife.

You are missing out.

suregurl:
No woman will willingly say she want to marry from a polygamous family[b][/b]. What supposed to be for one will be shared by two/more in polygamous marriage/family.... Still waiting for the elders/experienced to comment.....

The ones that did it have a gun to their heads?

Chiamaka01:
@topic, no, i can't. I'm a human being, not property.

How does polygamy make you a property?

Is it not prevention of polygamy that actually makes someone a property?

Sagamite:

How does polygamy make you a property?
Is it not prevention of polygamy that actually makes someone a property?

Marriage is a contract between two people, not acccumulation of women by a man.

Chiamaka01:


Marriage is a contract between two people, not acccumulation of women by a man.

Which kin contract?

Where did you see that?

Sagamite:

Which kin contract?
Where did you see that?

Okay, fine. How would you rather define marriage?

Chiamaka01:


Okay, fine. How would you rather define marriage?

My definition of marriage is my business with whoever I engage in one with. Just the way your definition of marriage is your business with whoever you engage in one with.

You don't and can't define mine for me, and I don't and can't define yours for you, except you are marrying me. That would make you the luckiest woman on Earth by the way.

Marriage by law is merely a mating association registered with the local authorities because it has some value in the society's configuration, based on the values that local host society desires.

Beyond that (registration), it should not be the business of the authorities how the parties in it decide to enjoy it as long as no physical restraints or violence is used.

All that "marriage is a contract" is just meaningless platitudes you have heard.

[quote
author=Sagamite post=28391870]

My definition of marriage is my business with whoever I engage in one
with. Just the way your definition of marriage is your business with
whoever I engage in one with.

You don't and can't define mine for me, and I don't and can't define
yours for you, except you are marrying me. That would make you the
luckiest woman on Earth by the way.
All that "marriage is a contract" is just meaningless platitudes you
have heard.[/quote]

You're contradicting yourself.

Chiamaka01:


You're contradicting yourself.

How am I contradicting myself?

Chiamaka01:

Hmm, my dad can answer that.
Yes, i won't. My husband can't decide that because i am not a sex slave. He will see reason with me. He's not narrow-minded as the men you surround yourself with.

You are not a sex slave but you insist you have to be bought since it is "your culture"?

Sagamite:


How am I contradicting myself?

You said earlier that none of us can define marriage for the other, but you call my definition, "meaningless"?

Chiamaka01:


You said earlier that none of us can define marriage for the other, but you call my definition, "meaningless"?

I said your definition was meaningless based on the general applicability you initially claimed it was.

That was why I called it a meaningless platitude.

If you choose to define your marriage as that, then that is your business.

Another meaningless platitude people use is "marriage should be for life". The only "life" I know is the type they give in American courts for gruesome murder. Even in the UK, Life means like 15-30 years only.

Sagamite:


You are not a sex slave but you insist you have to be bought since it is "your culture"?

The payment of bride-price is a marriage rite, i'm not surprised people like you see it as a business deal.

Chiamaka01:


The payment of bride-price is a marriage rite, i'm not surprised people like you see it as a business deal.

What is a marriage rite? Why is it necessary?

Why don't you see polygamy and taking your husband surname as a "rite" too?

Abi your culture never had those?