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Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam - Family - Nairaland

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Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lalasticlala(m): 9:05pm On Nov 13, 2014
A Malaysian-Chinese, Mrs Odediran, an optometrist, is married to a retired Nigerian United Nations Children’s Fund United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) staff member.
Read her interesting interview with Tribune:

Can you let us into your background?

I’m a Chinese but grew up in Malaysia. I’m from a non-Christian home but there was a small population of Christians there. Most were Buddhists, so there were many temples where idolswere worshipped. Buddhism is an ancient religion while Christianity was regarded as Western religion.I lost my mother as a teenager, my father therefore took another wife. My father is a businessman and also runs a big farm, so we were quite comfortable. He spent his money mainly on educating us.

When did you get married?

That was January 16, 1988.

How did you meet your spouse?

I became a Christian when I went to Australia in 1981 for my A’Level studies. In 1982, I was in Brisbane, where I studied Optometry while he studied Public Health Engineering. We both belonged to Overseas Christian Fellowship (OCF) and he was the president. The fellowship held its convention at the time we were rounding off our courses. We were in the dining room and I wasn’t feeling fine, I therefore asked him for a pain relieverwhich he gave me. That was the first time we held aclose gaze. I felt a strange feeling within me and his thought didn’t leave me. It was same with him. He later told me his mind but what got him confused was the fact that he was coming back to Nigeria a week after. Since I have learnt to hear from God, I prayed and He gave me Psalm 112 as a confirmation and then I knew there was no going back. My profession was then in great demand in Brisbane. I therefore got employed immediately after graduating. We thus got in touch through mailsand phone calls.

Didn’t you entertain any fear marrying someone outside your country and continent?

God gave me a word in Psalms 45 and I held on to this. It was a lot of stress because I didn’t have the support of my family. My maternal grandmother on her part was concerned about the distance. The Bible was what gave me comfort.

How did your family receive the news?

I wrote my dad and asked, ‘Is it okay or alright if I marry a non-Chinese and non- white?’ I intentionally didn’t say African or Nigerian. He replied ‘Please consider very well.’ He later sent my aunties to me in Brisbane to discourage me. My father was very authoritative. He later came, asked me to resign and come back to our town, Penang in Malaysia. Back home, my family members and relatives kept on trying to persuade me to let go of the relationship. They made jest of African black skin and said their lips were thick and they were hungry. They referred to my white skin as milk and my husband as coffee. They also taunted me that no children of mine would look like me.

What effect did this have on your relationship?

We were still getting in touch and my dad knew this.I sometimes spoke with him on the phone. My dad never stopped or scolded me. My father didn’t actually understand English Language and so didn’t understand what I was saying. I came to Nigeria in 1987 to pay him a visit. I told everyone else except my dad and stepmother. My husband was then staying at 1004 in Lagos. It was during this visit that he has got a job with the United Nations Children’s Fund United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF), after working for some few years with the Lagos State government. We decided to get married, and so we prayed about it and God gave us middle of January, precisely January 16 the following year, asour wedding date.

What was your husband’s family reaction to his choice of you?

His father asked him if there was no other person inNigeria he could marry. I met some of his siblings and we were cautious in the way we related.

How did the wedding go?

We had it in our home church in Penang. None of my family members attended. My father bribed my two sisters in New Zealand with money so as not to attend. Only my aunty and her four children attended and she came back the next day to the hotel where we stayed weeping that she was scolded by other family members.

How long did it take your dad in particular to come to terms with your choice of husband?

I was writing him to give him update about us though he never replied. Even while in Australia, he never replied my letters aside the one I wrote on thechoice of my husband. I actually never experiencedthe love of a father. Two years after our wedding, I travelled home and stayed in my uncle’s hotel. I hadour first child with me. My dad also came in to see my uncle. On sighting me, he avoided me. Again, while on a visit to my sister in Singapore, I tried to speak with him on phone but he hung up. In December 1993 which was our daughter’s fifth birthday, the ice was finally broken. He held a reception for us and invited relatives.

How did your spouse and father relate?

They shook hands but couldn’t communicate because as I said, my father didn’t understand English Language, but I remember that my husbandhelped iron my father’s shirts.

What were the things you found strange on getting to Nigeria?

We were then living in Ketu in Lagos and the way people run after molue, sell by the roadside, irregular power supply and having to carry buckets to fetch water due to lack of water supply, the sandy paths and untarred roads were somehow strange tome. But then, with the kind of upbringing I had, I could adapt to any situation. Another is the family member issue. Being the first child, he had to bear the responsibility of training his siblings and attend to some other needs or demands of his family.

Where is your spouse from?

Odeyinka in Osun State. His mother is from Apomu also in Osun State.

Have you ever been to these places?

Yes. We pay them visits and even take the children along. We also go to Gbongan, Ipetumodu and Ikire.

How easy was it learning Yoruba language?

I picked quite a bit like greetings especially. My husband taught me how to greet. I did my shopping at Mile 2 market.

How did you interact with the traders?

They call me their husband (oko mi). Some would help bring the stuffs to me so that I could make my choice. I remember a female trader got so excited during one of my shoppings that she carried me and swung me around.

What things did you find interesting?

Partying and blocking of roads. Nigerians do a lot of dancing. In Malaysia you don’t block the roads unless when rituals are being carried out during a burial ceremony.

What were the things you learnt to do?

I learnt to prepare amala, eba, egusi and okro soups, among others.

What about backing of babies?

I didn’t do that because I’m not tall. Our help did that.

What is your favourite Nigerian dish?

Moin moin and pap for breakfast and pounded yam with egusi soup for the other meals.

Can you pound yam?

I did it once but it was actually a little quantity. My husband later bought the pounding machine.

How will you describe a Nigerian man?

I won’t say a Nigerian man but a Christian man. Even though born again, some men have not removed their Nigerian mentality of dealing with women. You shouldn’t treat your wife as a slave. It amazes me when a man or his wife says ’my children’ or ‘my car’ and the like. In marriage, you no longer say ‘yours’ or ‘mine’ but ‘ours’. A man who has the understanding of what marriage entails runs his home in line with the Bible culture and I thank God that through the different Christian trainings we have had, my husband understands this. He protects me in many ways. For example, If we are going to give his parents money, I sometimes sign the cheque.

What thrills you about your spouse?

He’s very caring and he displays this nature not onlyto his family members, but whoever comes his way.

What other things did you discover about him?

He can also be angry and when he is, he looks sternand wears that cold face.

Where do both of you differ?

He loves visiting but my life is a close-circuit one.

Do you consider your husband romantic?

We are very free with each other; free to express ourselves and make each other to laugh. We are friends to each other.

What has made your marriage work till date?

Openness, commitment, trust, humility, joint decision—even if you don’t agree on an issue, you should exercise patience.

But some husbands will say, ‘how can I listen to my wife?’

We pray together on issues and hear from God what steps to take.Yours was a long distance relationship.

Will you encourage your children to do same?

It wasn’t that easy, but then our case is different. We knew each other physically before he came back to Nigeria. But I object to internet friendship because it can be deceitful.

To what extent are your children exposed to the Nigerian lifestyle?

They know how to greet in Yoruba language. When they were young, they sometimes attended occasions in Yoruba traditional outfits.

Do you also attend socials in the traditional wears?

I don’t like iro and buba because you have to tie the wrapper round you. I like it free like the Kaftan or boubou.


Source :
http://www.temisblog.com/2014/11/chinese-woman-married-to-yoruba-man-tell-her-exciting-story-day-i-pounded-yam.html[img][/img]

3 Likes

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by dmjinc(m): 9:09pm On Nov 13, 2014
Thank you Lord! Where are the others? *Nairaland* grin grin
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:16pm On Nov 13, 2014
in case grin
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Dramadiddy(m): 9:19pm On Nov 13, 2014
THIS LAND IS NOT FOR SALE
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:21pm On Nov 13, 2014
Bunsky property
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by tpia6: 9:23pm On Nov 13, 2014
Nigerians are such wide travellers, nowhere you wont find us.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:24pm On Nov 13, 2014
Just wondering OP, do you have any other job in real life other than culling up stories and creating threads on NL? You seem to put in somuch effort into it.

4 Likes

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:30pm On Nov 13, 2014
awwwwww
So sweet...
Love knows no boundary
__colour
__or race kiss

She looks like the average Nigerian albino not chinese sef. lipsrsealed

2 Likes

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Mclick(m): 9:35pm On Nov 13, 2014
Ehya, true she really love the man
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by LieDetector(m): 9:40pm On Nov 13, 2014
EroticAngelina:
in case grin
mek i follow you book space.



#Nairaland
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lalasticlala(m): 9:40pm On Nov 13, 2014
Phema:
Just wondering OP, do you have any other job in real life other than culling up stories and creating threads on NL? You seem to put in somuch effort into it.

LOL
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:44pm On Nov 13, 2014
lalasticlala:

LOL

Interesting topics though. Well done wink
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Tallesty1(m): 9:47pm On Nov 13, 2014
The Only Chinese Product That Lasted.

7 Likes

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by bustyhelen(f): 9:49pm On Nov 13, 2014
FP bound material.

Make i occupy space o, joining association of nairaland space bookers.

On a more serious note, nothing special about inter racial marriage. Jst dat d man didnt mary one of thoz old cargo oyinbos..
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:52pm On Nov 13, 2014
Wow! Good for them
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 9:53pm On Nov 13, 2014
Awwwwwwwww
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Janeify(f): 9:53pm On Nov 13, 2014
Lovely story...say no to racism,we are all one



What God has put together, let no man put asunder.


asundering cheesy ;Ddoesn't work when two people are meant to be togerther...between, she doesn't look like a Chinese woman,she looks like an albino.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lilmax(m): 9:59pm On Nov 13, 2014
We give God the glory

1 Like

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Jaymima(f): 10:01pm On Nov 13, 2014
Tallesty1:
The Only Chinese Product That Lasted.
Hahahahaha... A very durable Chinko marriage.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by diksucker(f): 10:04pm On Nov 13, 2014
Dis expired skinny yelo paw paw left all the yelo smal dks in china & malaysia for a blak huge afrikan dik, wetin big bk dk de cause. Mtcheww
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lalasticlala(m): 10:32pm On Nov 13, 2014
Phema:


Interesting topics though. Well done wink
thanxxx
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Slot301(f): 10:43pm On Nov 13, 2014
Wow!
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by jmoore(m): 11:04pm On Nov 13, 2014
Reminds me of 'chingwa' in Aba.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by englishmart(m): 11:05pm On Nov 13, 2014
pictures of the woman pounding the yams. Or this story is........... Complete am 4 your house! wink

She's already looking like an half-cast! This yoruba man must be very dark to have affected the completion of that beautiful woman!

1 Like

Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lalasticlala(m): 11:07pm On Nov 13, 2014
jmoore:
Reminds me of 'chingwa' in Aba.

it reminds me of osuofia in london
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Mutaino7(m): 11:20pm On Nov 13, 2014
wat God say will b d first shall neva come last..*oga lala abeg bring me my reading glass abi wetin u write 4 ur heading*
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by lalasticlala(m): 11:34pm On Nov 13, 2014
Mutaino7:
wat God say will b d first shall neva come last..*oga lala abeg bring me my reading glass abi wetin u write 4 ur heading*

i no c am.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by stonecoldcafe: 11:41pm On Nov 13, 2014
Cool
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Atk01(f): 12:00am On Nov 14, 2014
That's good.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by armyofone(m): 12:21am On Nov 14, 2014
.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 12:39am On Nov 14, 2014
And above all.., LOVE is the greatest.
Re: Chinese Woman Married To A Yoruba Man Tells Her Exciting Story:Day I Pounded Yam by Nobody: 1:20am On Nov 14, 2014
Hehehe

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