My friends sister is a full house wife and she can't do anything without asking her husband. Personally I feel a woman should have something doing even if its a small shop where she can sell to support the family financially and will also be able to care of the kids too.........

What's your opinion....... Happy Tuesday!

Does she have a degree?

OluwaChinenyenwa:

Does she have a degree?

Yes

Is her hubby complaining?

[size=15pt]Actually I don't really fancy the house wife thing, but is this said woman complaining?[/size]

pearlzy92:


Yes

Then she should get a job

I can actually. I won't want any maid be in charge of my kids and home just because of work. I won't totally be jobless unlike her, I will make sure I have a source of income that won't require me to go out early and come bck late. I will quit being one once my last born is old enough to go to boarding school, say 5years

Topics like this makes me believe when people say that women are the worst enemies to themselves. The term "house wife" is very common with some Nigerian ladies who want to create a class. Do you guys know the amount work involved in building a home? These ladies are "home builders" or 'home makers'. The word "house wife" as used in Nigeria is derogatory yet these people are the ones laying the foundation for a good society.

Haven't stated this, it depends on the orientation of the woman in question. If working would contribute to her positive self esteem, she should work. But not for fear of being look down by fellow women or for economic muscle flexing. What I get from proponents of "A wife must work" is that there are things a woman spend money on which the husband is not suppose to know or approve. That is why they need their own money. In marriage, transparency is KEY.

Not even under a white man's roof. . . .not to mention a black one!
Tufiakwa!

pearlzy92:
My friends sister is a full house wife and she can't do anything without asking her husband. Personally I feel a woman should have something doing even if its a small shop where she can sell to support the family financially and will also be able to care of the kids too.........

What's your opinion....... Happy Tuesday!

Our opinion? Really? Are you part of the head and neck crew? If yes, you sister SHOULD OBEY HER HUSBAND. She is on the right track. Don't know why we keep forgetting the tenets of being the quintessential African wife. In case we have all forgotten...

From the emeritus prof himself Ilekokonit...

https://www.nairaland.com/1980592/tips-keeping-good-african-man

Tips To Keeping A Good African Man - © Ilekokonit - 4 Nov 2014

· Recognise that not every westernised idea or norm is good for the longevity of an African relationship
· Respect your man, respect his African values
· Don’t rubbish African culture for the sake of feminism
· Know or learn what being an African man is all about
· Recognise that a woman living alone for a long concerted time reduces a woman’s compatibility with a proper African man
· Don’t puncture his balloon just to get even or drag him down
· Don’t be hateful, spiteful or seek revenge
· Be forgiving, Don’t be mean and Don’t be wicked
· Recognise that even Beyoncé who sang “independent woman” is still holding tight to her man, likewise the Queen of England and Margaret Thatcher before her death
· Keep the parts of your body that are meant to be hidden, hidden and not on public display
· Serve as a good role model to his children especially his daughter(s)
· Don’t by your way of life / dressing set bad moral examples for his children especially his daughter(s)
· Don’t stop him from bringing up his children with good old school African values
· Never antagonize him in front of anyone especially his kids even behind his back
· Recognize that a boy’s first and everlasting hero is his father and so, never belittle, curse, shout at or castigate him in front of his children especially his sons. Remember that in almost ALL cases, the boy will remind you in later years how you maltreated his dad when he was young and he couldn’t do anything about it
· Recognise that a woman’s crown is her man
· Be DRAMA FREE, Don’t be rude, saucy or stroppy
· Don’t be selfish or self-centered
· Don’t be addicted to TV, fashion, jewelries or your career !!!
· Don’t keep up with the jones
· Believe in for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health because he seriously does whatever the situation
· Don’t be evil or fetish
· You Don’t need a pastor or imam to tell you about the future of your relationship
· Value his opinion above that of your pastor or imam or even your parents
· Realise that 2 cannot work together unless they agree
· Don’t compete with him financially or otherwise fully realizing that he is willing to share everything he has with you
· Don’t have the erroneous belief that "his money is your money and your money is your money"
· Don’t keep secrets from him
· Don’t be crafty, evasive, deceitful or manipulative
· Don’t try to manipulative him with anything (not even religion)
· Don’t be combative, cantankerous
· Don’t tear your own home apart with your very own hands like the woman who does just that with her own hands in Proverbs 14:1 and is described by the bible as foolish
· Realise that a foolish woman keeps talking but a wise woman understands the power of her words as well as her silence
· Realise that it is a FACT when Proverbs 21:9 says that It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house and as such keeps your home peaceful
· Don’t be moody, unfriendly or stubborn to him
· REALISE THAT PART OF WHAT PUTS A MAN OFF HIS WIFE FOR GOOD IS THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS YOU USE WHEN QUARELLING WITH HIM
· Realise the difference between slapping your man in a film and slapping your man in real life
· Keep friends who are family orientated and want to last in their relationships with their other halves
· Don’t threaten to harm yourself or drink bleach just to get his attention or win an argument
· Faces issues head on without hiding behind non issues
· Don’t deny him his conjugal rights
· Want to grow old with him together, be in the relationship for the long haul
· Don’t be crafty, evasive, cagey or secretive
· Don’t have unnecessary male friends
· allow him access to your phone if you are not hiding anything
· Don’t be deceived by your being young or by your beautiful face, realise that the real beauty of a woman is in your character
· Don’t believe that because you are beautiful then you cannot be corrected
· Don’t lie to him
· Don’t be a combative feminist
· Don’t indulge in being married to an inanimate object
· Don’t smoke and if you do drink, do so rarely, moderately and only on social occasions and Don’t form the habit of drinking alone (Even most men Don’t drink alone except for alcoholics)
· Don’t do drugs
· Value the old school family values that our parents held dear
· Treat him like your mum treated your dad (hopefully, your mum treated your dad well)
· Realise that no man wants to live with a combative quarrelsome woman
· Don’t hide behind crocodile tears just to get your way
· Don’t always have an answer for everything (nobody does)
· Don’t talk at 1000 miles per hour just because you can
· Think before you talk
· Don’t monopolize the conversation.
· Conversation is a 2 way thing. You talk, keep quiet, let him talk, and you listen, then ponder his response before forming your response
· Don’t be over-ambitious or money motivated if you want to keep an African man
· Don’t strive to keep up with the Jones, Don’t copy your friends especially their bad behaviors including haughtiness and pride towards your man
· Don’t copy the way loud, foul-mouthed Nollywood actresses abuse men. Copying them is a recipe for quick divorce
· Don’t feel superior to your man and never treat him with disdain or arrogance
· Don’t be stingy to him if he is generous to you
· Realise that him loving you is not a sign of weakness
· Never try to give him orders
· Make respect your watch word
· Love a harmonious home
· NEVER keep grudges, never bottles things up
· openly discuss issues as they arise
· NEVER discuss your marital issues with your parents, friends or any 3rd party
· Be in the relationship for the long haul and Don’t be a serial man changer just because you think your beauty will last forever
· NEVER EVER feel that there are many fish in the ocean (not all fish are good. Some are poisonous in the short or long run)
· If you get a good man, do your best to keep him irrespective of what your “friends” say as ENOUGH African men are delaying marriage because of the aggression and wild ways of the potential suitors currently available
· Realise that the phrase money is not everything did not just fall from the sky. There was a reason it was coined those many years ago
· Realise that a lot of “proper” African men see educated African women as too combative and so tone down your “gra gra” when you are in his company
· You may be a manager of teacher at work but drop those badges at the door before you enter the house as no African likes being lectured by his woman. You are his woman and not his lecturer.
· If you meet a new guy who is honest enough to tell you he is currently unemployed, never assume that he is going to ask you for money as REAL African men never ask a woman for money nor collect such if offered
· Never get used to living alone for too long lest you become so used to your freedom, space and singleness that sub-consciously you frustrate every new man you meet because your spirit wants to remain free
· Realise that NOT everything that helps you climb the career ladder is helpful to your marriage. Some of them are destructive to African marriages
· Never use sex as a weapon
· Whenever your hubby chooses a late night hubby away from the home or chooses to go alone to the beer parlor repeatedly instead of staying with you at home and only comes back at around 2am or later on a consistent basis then he is trying to say to you that his love for you is dying a slow death and he can no longer bear your company as you are making his life miserable at home and/or you are no longer listening to him
· Don’t neglect your man supposedly because of religious duties, realise that there is a time for everything and Don’t spend too many hours at church/mosque leaving your man lonely at home
· Don’t hide behind religion or religious phrases just to control your man, Don’t choose to pontificate and sermonize him instead of discussing real issues with your non-religious hat on
· Don’t adopt a holier than thou attitude with him
· Don’t lecture him, Don’t sermonize when he is discussing something with you with his rational mind
· Don’t form the bad habit of lying to him especially if he is truthful to you
· NEVER put your career or business above your relationship !!!
· Don’t feel your joint kids are your property or a meal ticket for you in the future and never use his kids as a weapon or bargaining ticket with him
· NEVER turn his children against him
· Be kind to him
· Don’t practice NLP - neuro linguistic programming (or any other type of mind control techniques that Westernised women use to climb the career ladder) on him as most smart men know when they are being manipulated
· Never use NLP techniques on him when discussing issues with him in a ploy to put him on the defensive so that you will win the argument
· Don’t argue with him unnecessarily or argue with him just to tick your log book of arguments you have won with him
· Don’t try to control him IN ANY WAY
· Don’t give him orders
· Don’t argue with him just for arguments sake
· Don’t wind him up or stress him when there is no need for it
· If you try to control him or play unnecessary mind games on him or try to control his mind in the first few weeks of meeting him, then chances are that that relationship will not last (that’s even if it starts in the first place)
· Remember that unnecessarily or repeatedly stressing your man only quickens the end of that relationship
· Realise that “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man” is just a book that Steve Harvey made loads of money from.
· A lady should always be a lady in her actions and in thoughts and “Acting Like a Lady and Thinking Like a Man” is not just difficult to maintain, it is deceptive, it portrays the woman as unnecessarily competitive and aggressive and is a sure fire way to a quick divorce or separation
· Wishing you all the best as you search for that “Good” African man of which there are loads IF YOU KNOW HOW TO KEEP THEM INTERESTED FOR THE LONG HAUL

curiousmind11:
Topics like this makes me believe when people say that women are the worst enemies to themselves. The term "house wife" is very common with some Nigerian ladies who want to create a class. Do you guys know the amount work involved in building a home? These ladies are "home builders" or 'home makers'. The word "house wife" as used in Nigeria is derogatory yet these people are the ones laying the foundation for a good society.

Haven't stated this, it depends on the orientation of the woman in question. If working would contribute to her positive self esteem, she should work. But not for fear of being look down by fellow women or for economic muscle flexing. What I get from proponents of "A wife must work" is that there are things a woman spend money on which the husband is not suppose to know or approve. That is why they need their own money. In marriage, transparency is KEY.

!