My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! - Family - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! (2067 Views)
Children's Day: Share Your Most Cherished Childhood Experience / ‘no! Don’t Touch Me There’ / "No! Don't Touch Me There" (2) (3) (4)
| My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by NewNigeriaMind: 10:52am On Jan 08, 2015 |
This is not to support child abuse or to encourage it: While I was much younger.......let say about 9 years old to when I was about 12. There is a girl I feel I might have abused or might have been abused by my brothers. I grew up in a comfortable home with 3 elders brothers and 2 younger brothers. The Bungalow is owned by my dad, as such as, I grew up as Omo Landlord. In my dads house, there are two shops in front of the building. One is used by my mom and the other is used by an Igbo woman with 3 kids as a restaurant. The eldest of her children is a girl and she should be about 6 when this started and I was about 9. I DONT KNOW IF TO EVEN CALL THIS A CONFESSION, I AM IN MY OFFICE IN VI now and I am deeply sad thinking about what I think happened cause I have just a figment of the memory left. I remember Amaka growing up I remember Amaka coming to our living room to play with us most afternoon and evenings. I remember there was a day Amaka was laid naked on the bed I remember someone playing with her privates I remember she was growing breats and the buds where hard and erect I remember we were about 4 boys and someone among us was doing different things on Amaka body. While the rest of us kept playing or just watching. I remember Amaka didn't cry or acted like she hated it I remember Amaka didn't lose her virginity but something did happen ( or she could have maybe I just cant remember) I remember there were no adults around. Although our mothers were outside in their different shops This play or act of laying Amaka naked in the living room while we play with her body happened not once.................. I pray Amaka was not scarred from what we did to her. But I know back then I wasn't aware of the implication of the play or what we were doing to Amaka. I doubt if Amaka knew herself. I wish someone has taught us it is wrong to touch girls inappropriately as kids while I was growing up, maybe we wouldn't have done some things we did. This is my little confession I guess...... cant say more. I personally think 80 percent of abuse happens among kids in the same age range -----remember that play mommy and daddy. we all did it. The abuse cuts both ways, the boy and girl involved. God be with us all. 5 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by somcherry(f): 10:56am On Jan 08, 2015 |
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| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by NewNigeriaMind: 10:58am On Jan 08, 2015 |
Please I am not seeking your judgments or understanding..... I just need to let this out after going through the earlier post. So pls, no abusive words pls. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by remsonik(f): 10:59am On Jan 08, 2015 |
****sprinkles holy water**** Op your sins have been forgiven,go and sin no more. Educate fathers and mother and everyone in your neighbourhood, office etc on the dangers of this things 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Emmyginger(m): 11:06am On Jan 08, 2015 |
to conquer child abuse we need to create more awareness ourselves rather dan waiting for d govt to do so cos na election dey their mind nw |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Olodapsing(m): 11:09am On Jan 08, 2015 |
I read this slowly and it brings back old memory, lolz I believe what you don't know its a sin is not a sin. who wants to play Mummy and Daddy?  1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 11:26am On Jan 08, 2015 |
So sad. I weep for poor Amaka. This just shows we must never leave our girl child unsupervised in the presence of a male that is not their father EVER. Even with the father sef we must be vigilant. Infact even with a female nanny etc we must be very vigilant. Never leav your child in a Nannys care for a very long period of time. Even me that it is my own child I feel like breaking their head if I've not had a break from them for a long time. Now imagine someone who's child it is not. Our parents left us unsupervised too much back in the day. I just thank God nothing like this ever happened to me. It is all th grace of God 2 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by debonairprinx(m): 11:27am On Jan 08, 2015 |
OP; this is very brave of you to come out with what you never knew was wrong when the act was committed but was actually wrong. We all have this vague memory(some still clear) of these things that happened to us. I was a victim too(but won't be sharing mine). This events shaped most of our sexual perspective and reaction or approach towards the opposite sex. Am sure things won't repeat itself when we sire a child. The damage is done, realising and accepting the fact is path to retribution. Remain blessed. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Amya(f): 1:37pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
This is wrong. very but the worst form of abused is from someone older and trusted. Now that one will scar you for life. I have tons of stories from uncle's, neighbours, Aunty's husband infact 50% of male adults i knew as a kid touched me inappropriately. I kept thinking I caused it somehow, now I know better. I'll do any thing to protect the kids and teens of today because such things messes with your ahead and traumatises you for life. You at a point start to feel like something beneath garbage. Hopefully I did turn out sane eventually. Glory be to God. 4 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by dhabeautyjas(f): 4:13pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
May God help us all. We need to be very vigilant not only with our female kids but the male too. 4 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 7:14pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
NewNigeriaMind, now that you have realised this, I hope it influences how you take care of your own children. I had similar experiences. So bad. Ayamlaykorn |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by zeb04(f): 8:06pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
So sad for amaka  now I appreciate all the over-protectiveness my mum had on me I even felt she was treating my cousins,relative unfairly.Op ask God to forgive you if you are a christian so you don't reap what you sow(in relation's to your kids) 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Agrika: 8:14pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
Bloody Bastard, inferior creature, *spits on him* (yeah I said it) |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Onegai(f): 8:34pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
I'm going to say this, some few observations. @NewNigeriaMind, Yes, what happened was very wrong. And as you see, not only was that girl scarred, you were as well. You weren't playing "Mummy and Daddy", recall that you said you were the middle child and about 9 years old, with 3 older brothers. Which means (logically it is impossible for one woman to have a child every year, consecutively, her body will give out), at least one of your older brothers was a teenager. And he had attained Puberty and was having feelings no-one explained to him. So he acted out on the nearest female, and you and your brothers, well, joined him in "his play". Instead of your brother to have learned about Intimacy from a legitimate source (your parents), he was fed by whatever society threw at him, saw a child and thought that behaviour was acceptable. Somehow, some adult in this situation felt it was perfectly fine to leave a 9 year oldchild undressed with a teenage boy. Might as well as offered that child to a grown-up man. Amaka didn't like it. Most people feel like they're watching a film in which someone who looks like them is having something bad happen to them, because they can't explain what's going on. Most children never stop their abusers, which is why we need to talk to them and teach them why it's wrong and what to do. I think you need to look inward, praying about this on your own may not help you heal. And pastors in Nigeria (not all) aren't equipped to deal with this. So you may need to see a pychologist, just talk, resolve that guilt. Then pray. And let go and forgive yourself and make sure you tell people to watch out for your situation replaying itself in their child's life. |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by PrettyClare7(f): 8:38pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
Op,your post has brought tears to my eyes. Tnx for opening my eyes with regards to how i will bring up my kids in future. No aspect of their life will be left unprotected. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 8:49pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
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| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Agrika: 8:58pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
laykorn:I admit its sheer immaturity, but I still stand by my words...I too am a victim of a child abuse so blame me not when I insult dat creature...confess to which priest...no be dem be d main culprits 2 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 9:03pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
Agrika:I can't imagine someone who was abused to pray for another innocent being to be abused. That prayer, I swear gives me stomach aches. Edit it please, I'll edit all my words. Ayamlaykorn 3 Likes |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Agrika: 9:07pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
laykorn:Ok, ok, I admit I was wrong and went "three" far...happy now? |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by zeb04(f): 9:13pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
laykorn:I understand she is saying that out of hurt if the op has truly repented of that act her insults cannot Follow him and if you can't understand that then you are not any better. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 9:13pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
Agrika:I edited. Edit your quotes too. I can't really imagine the way you feel but I'm sure it's a really bad one. Sorry. Ayamlaykorn 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by anthoniaz(f): 9:14pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
May God help us to be good parents. |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 9:16pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
zeb04:  Ayamlaykorn 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by FameG(f): 10:46pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
God!!! I feel 4 d lady now. how wld she feel now? its terrible abeg. Abeg parents d devil can use innocent children to cause problem o. Pls lets give them the right education as early as possible .This children of scientific age are wiser than we know. |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 11:28pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
OP, it sounds like you were not the primary instigator but the older boys around you led you into doing inappropriate things. You yourself were a victim of sorts in this situation. All in all, a horrible situation that may have been prevented by education like you said and I feel bad for you and the girl involved. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by BlackBaron: 12:40am On Jan 09, 2015 |
fem29:...is it only a female child you'll protect or you never heard boys get abused too? Both sexes are at risk of abuse by either older males or females. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by soulglo: 5:44am On Jan 09, 2015 |
Amya: Very common in Nigeria. Nigerian males are generally not taught self control. 1 Like |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by soonest(f): 6:56am On Jan 09, 2015 |
From what i have gathered there are few females that were not molested in one form or the other. Ranging from older kids to helps, neighbours and even relatives. It's indeed very crazy. I'm very vigilant with my kids as i hear boys are not even left out. May God help us parents. Op, ask God for forgiveness. |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 7:49am On Jan 09, 2015 |
what a touching story |
| Re: My Childhood Experience: In Line With This Topic: No Don't Touch Me There!!! by Nobody: 11:39am On Jan 09, 2015 |
BlackBaron: True, yes you are right, but girls are more at risk. |
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