One of my good friends is a certified pro at investigating men. She meets a guy and goes to research him on social media, google, and even her State’s Judiciary website to see whether he has any outstanding cases open or closed that she should be aware of (i.e. previous marriages, credit card liens etc). She pretty much doesn’t like to surprise herself and in this day and age where men be pulling James Bond stunts from out of the blue, I am not mad at her tactics at all.

I have another good friend who is also great at this, she knows how to read between the lines on social media. She is probably the reason why some people padlock their Twitter accounts because home girl be on her job with tracking conversations, who liked what and who followed who, who subbed who and who deleted their accounts. I mean, the girl is a pro at putting two and two together.

 I admit to googling women, shoot I occasionally Google myself so why should any woman be an exemption? I will pretty much try to gather as much information out there that I can, after all its all public records, isn’t it?

And then beyond researching and trying to gather information about a woman who is yet to make the cut, there is also staying in the loop and staying informed about women who have already made the cut i.e your girlfriends or wives. This involves checking phones, emails, etc. This is a topic that has come up a million times for discussion on social media and my stance remains the same – I will check a woman’s phone every now and then. Knowledge is power!

During a recent cycle of the wash, rinse and repeat Twitter discussion on checking a woman’s phone, someone I follow stated that she used to do a weekly sweep of all her man’s devices in her relationship, and I got a very good chuckle out of that. On my part, my approach is this, I won’t always go out of my way to snoop look through a woman’s phone and similar devices but if she leaves his phone in my line of vision, I am definitely going to go through it every now and then and satisfy my curiosities. If I sit down and see an email inbox open, I will take a quick glance through it. There is no shame in my game.

I happened to stumble across the email of an ex (and in this case, I didn’t set out to check, I logged on and she was still signed in), and thanks to my quick sweep of the inbox, I discovered some very incriminating deeds including an email professing serious love for a man “I have always loved you and I will never stop loving you“. Hian! based on those findings, I quickly exited the budding relationship and you know, down the line, she actually apologized to me and confessed that she had been fooling herself all along thinking that she had moved on from that guy.

She eventually moved across oceans to be with the guy and today they are married.  I would have been there playing second fiddle to another man if I hadn’t stumbled across all of that. Needless to say, I have been a firm believer in seizing opportunities to investigate a woman ever since then because if you ask me, that was a God-sent opportunity and my Lord did save me from a life of playing second best to another man.

On the flip, I know some men who are definitely not about the investigative journalism life and I can understand their stance too. I personally would rather be aware and informed than to live in blissful ignorance. And even if a woman has nothing to hide and the search comes out clean, at least I know that I saw and confirmed that with my korokoro eyes.