Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / NewStats: 3,195,577 members, 7,958,785 topics. Date: Thursday, 26 September 2024 at 12:27 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 (2097 Views)
Comedian Akpororo Presents Plantain & Egg as Birthday Gift To Wife(Cute Though) / Problems Upgrading To Wife 1.0 / Latest Teaching Joke - Girlfriend 7.0 And Wife 1.0 (2) (3) (4)
Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 7:02am On Mar 16, 2015 |
This is interesting A little humour Marriage Software This is what a guy wrote to our systems analyst (Marriage Software Division): Dear Systems Analyst, I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that the new program began unexpected Child Processing and also took up a lot of space and valuable resources. This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during systems initialization and then it monitors all other system activities. Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf 5.3" no longer run, and crashes the system whenever selected. Attempting to operate selected "Soccer 6.3" always fails and "Shopping 7.1" runs instead. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background whilst attempting to run any of my favorite applications. Be it online or offline. I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but uninstall doesn't work on this program. Can you please help? .... AND THIS IS WHAT OUR ANALYST SAID: Dear Customer, This is a very common problem resulting from a basic misunderstanding of the functions of the Wife 1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM designed by its Creator to run everything on your current platform. You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not designed to do this and it is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program files from the System once it is installed. Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but have ended up with even more problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support and Solicitors' Fees). Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it Installed and deal with the difficulties as best as you can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever you think has caused them, you must run the......... C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will freeze the entire system. It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of times, and eventually hope that the operating system will return to normal. Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance programme, can be very rewarding. To get the most out of it, consider buying additional Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates 5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or "TENDERNESS\ UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating Out Without the Kids 7.2.1" (if Child processing has already started). DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary 2.1" (Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand 3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost certainly CRASH. BEST WISHES! Yours, Systems Analyst. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Nobody: 7:13am On Mar 16, 2015 |
. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by mcdonald59(m): 7:15am On Mar 16, 2015 |
odi nma |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Beamborla(f): 7:24am On Mar 16, 2015 |
Cool |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by codeaddict(m): 7:31am On Mar 16, 2015 |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Chinatownm(m): 7:34am On Mar 16, 2015 |
d complainant has a joystick 2.1 issue and should be monitored closely by a qualified programmer available esp counsellor 7.2.1 or pastor 2.0. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Enegod(m): 7:52am On Mar 16, 2015 |
blenyo11:He should format the system 1 Like |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by eph12(m): 8:56am On Mar 16, 2015 |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 9:40am On Mar 16, 2015 |
Formatting can be a big problem if child processing is on Enegod: 1 Like |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Craigston: 10:41am On Mar 16, 2015 |
There are many bugs in Wife 1.0 OS. Report it to the vendor: he can be of immense help. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 1:38pm On Mar 16, 2015 |
Craigston:The vendor has already given some tips blenyo11: |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by stonemind(f): 4:13pm On Mar 16, 2015 |
Lolzzzz |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Drniyi4u(m): 5:22pm On Mar 16, 2015 |
lol |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by Craigston: 6:18pm On Mar 16, 2015 |
blenyo11:See trouble o. And the OS keeps displaying warning messages and pop-ups whenever I try to by-pass it's firewall. A nagging system. I boot it up and want to personalise the display and, if possible, use Command Line instead of the icon-based user interface but it keeps loading complex designs and spends a lot of time doing that. 1 Like |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 6:39pm On Mar 16, 2015 |
Craigston:I think you should install ignore 3.5.1 1 Like |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by theSpark(m): 9:43am On Mar 19, 2015 |
Hehe Geek stuff. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by ChinenyeN(m): 10:52pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
blenyo11: Ignore 3.5.1 is only compatible with Girlfriend 7.0 or earlier. To use Ignore 3.5.1 on the Wife 1.0 OS, you'll need to install Intimacy VM SE. In simple terms, it's a virtual machine that uses Wife 1.0 APIs to set up different compatibility modes for Wife 1.0 applications. It tries to put you in control of task scheduling for virtually all processes (except The Clock, which is pretty much a Wife 1.0 subroutine that affects other processes). Intimacy VM SE can be a life saver. The only issue is that it's heavy on RAM and some processes cannot be auto-managed. Another thing, if you exit the VM software, Wife 1.0 begins to nag you about unnecessary updates for Intimacy. The only way to stop the constant system tray notifications is to keep Intimacy running at all times. It'll definitely task your memory though. 1 Like |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 1:00am On Mar 20, 2015 |
ChinenyeN:Hummmm It's true! This is where applications like flower 5.9.7 should always come in |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by ArcToyin(m): 10:29am On Mar 24, 2015 |
Interesting!!!. Before you upgraded, you ought to have went through the 'read me' in the patch that came with the folder. This will have guided you against unnecessary hiccup that might come up in the course and after installation. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by jamb20s: 1:43am On Mar 27, 2015 |
Simply Dual Boot Girlfriend 9.0 with Wife 1.0 ................ Shikena !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by ChinenyeN(m): 6:04am On Mar 27, 2015 |
jamb20s: The only issue with this is that most market versions of Wife 1.0 do not support multi-boot, and so the boot manager does not recognize Girlfriend 9.0 installations. Anyone who wants to effectively dual boot Girlfriend 9.0 with Wife 1.0, will have to make the Girlfriend 9.0 boot manager their primary. Set the master boot record to point to Girlfriend 9.0's boot manager, because it has the advantage of recognizing Wife 1.0 installations. Just be careful. Sometimes, when you're running Wife 1.0 on a multi-boot system, an automated systems audit will alert you about an 'unrecognized partition' on the hard drive and ask for a description. You can ignore it, but after some time, Wife 1.0 will actually try to format and write to the partition. |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by jamb20s: 7:33am On Mar 27, 2015 |
Then i'll buy new computers preferably Desktop and install different version of Girlfriends to them starting from Girlfriend 1.0 |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by blenyo11(m): 3:13pm On Mar 27, 2015 |
You can't have more than one computer here ooooh |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by slimdiggi: 11:22am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Re: Upgrading From Girlfriend 7.0 To Wife 1.0 by kinwayne(m): 6:20pm On Mar 28, 2015 |
Hahaha really cool |
(1) (Reply)
How To Be Sarcastic - Great Answers To Stupid Questions / WORLD FOOD DAY: Join The Fun, Mention One Crazy Food Combination / Thank God For Okorocha
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 45 |