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Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans - Foreign Affairs (3) - Nairaland

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South Africans Attack Nigerians -VANGUARD / See What South Africans Had To Say Concerning Xenophobia / Malawi, Congo, Bar South Africans From Entering Their Country (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by major466(m): 5:50pm On Apr 24, 2015
Great article.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Nobody: 5:51pm On Apr 24, 2015
an interesting story. to cap it all d South Africans got the caps but no heads to fit in. They are lazy and inhuman . I always ask a Q. where were d SA when d Somalian. .d Pakistani. .d Nigerians. d Ethiopians ..d Ghanaians. ..Bangladeshis rented all the shops from d whites ?.

4 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by zizz(f): 5:55pm On Apr 24, 2015
THIS IS THE BEST WRITE UP EVER. I salute the way you articulated your struggles in SA amidst the harsh conditions you still made your way through it.
Like you rightly pointed out some dim wits instead of working to their elbows feel they should be spoon fed, feeling that the world owes them something or they are entitled to who knows what. Get y'all aszes out there and WORK.
God bless you OP for this write up.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by ghostmist: 5:57pm On Apr 24, 2015
One thing I admire about the Igbos is their "never say die" attitude to life.against hope they believe in hope...always pressing forward against all odds...impressive I must say.

8 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Nobody: 5:58pm On Apr 24, 2015
Common my people stop whining, and being lazy like South Africans. Just take your time , read and appreciate what this lady has chronicled here. Haba! Kai mene ne .

5 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by akunjohn(m): 6:00pm On Apr 24, 2015
fretnot:
My name is Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. I am a Nigerian. Born in Nigeria to two Nigerian parents. Raised in Queenstown, Eastern Cape by those same Nigerian parents right up until I completed my Bachelors at Stellenbosch.
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. Photo: supplied

Growing up in South Africa, I was always reminded by those around me that I was different to everyone else. In primary school, I had a much darker complexion than I do now, and super white teeth – the telling marks of a foreigner that betray you even when you put on your best English accent. It is just too obvious.

I bear citizenship of both worlds. I speak fluent Xhosa, Igbo, Afrikaans and English. I can make sense of Tswana and Sotho. I enjoy a good braai, I love vetkoek and bunny-chow. I can’t get enough of Bokomo WeetBix, I love Ouma’s rusks and I can pull off my panstulas with any outfit on a lazy Saturday when I want to head to town. I am the first to break it down with the ngwaza and the dombolo at the sound of some decent house music or kwaito be it in Pick n Pay or at a party.

I can sokkie and I enjoy it (albeit with my two left feet). My darkest moments can be reversed by koeksisters and a cup of rooibos tea any day. I can jump between the high pitched and arguably annoying accents of some Constantia moms, the lank kif and apparently sophisticated English of my Hilton brothers and the heavy accents of my fellow Eastern Capers. I can attempt the fast paced, lyrical Afrikaans of my coloured brothers in the Cape and I can serve you the best butternut soup you have ever known.

I am as South African as you need me to be.

But my ability to navigate all these spaces did not just happen. Learning to blend into all these spaces was a matter of survival for me.

You see from the day I set foot in Queenstown and started primary school, it was always made very clear to me that I was an outsider. I only had white friends from my first few years in school, because the other black girls couldn’t understand why I was black but only spoke in English. They thought I thought I was better than them. So I spent most of my breaks humbly eating my peanut butter and strawberry jam sandwich, surrounded by those who had Melrose cheese and Provita Crackers with Bovril and/or marmite sandwiches in their lunchboxes. The rest of the time I spent alone, save the few brave souls of similar complexion who tried to befriend me.

What nobody knew was that for the first three years of my life in South Africa, my little brother and I barely saw my dad more than twice a month. What was he doing absent from the home, other than selling pillowcases, duvets and bedsheets, from door to door on foot through the streets, villages and side roads of the old Transkei and Ciskei? My father would leave the house on Monday mornings after him and my mom got us ready for school, and he would be gone for days and weeks, selling the few pillowcases and bedsheets he had from door to door. On foot. We were never sure when he would return. But when he did, we were always more grateful for his safety and aliveness than anything else.

From Queenstown to Cala, Umtata, Qumbu, Qoqodala, Whittlesea, Mount Fletcher, King Williamstown, Mdantsane, Bhisho, Indwe, Butterworth, Aliwal North and even as far as Matatiele and Kokstad. There are so many other places he went to that I do not even know.

That is how my parents put us through school, until they saved up enough money to open their own little shop where they then started selling sewing machines, cotton and then community phones. Then sweets and chips and take-aways; and then hair products and the list goes on and on. It was on this that I was able to go through primary school, high school, and university. My parents have no tertiary education; it was only in their late 40s that both of them decided to register for part-time studies at Walter Sisulu to get their Diplomas. Note: Diplomas.

It took them four years, because they were busy trying to keep their kids in school, and keep selling their sweets and sewing machines while attempting to dignify their efforts with a degree.

My story is not unique – it is the story of most foreigners in South Africa. Very few foreigners come into SA with skills that make them employable here. Unless you are a medical doctor, an academic and maybe an engineer or well-established businessman before coming here, your chances of getting meaningful employment in SA are as limited as those of the United States letting Al-Qaeda members off the hook – almost impossible.

Most foreigners come to SA with the ability to braid hair, carve wood, or sell fruits, veggies, clothes, fizz pops, carpets and soap before they can find their feet here. Some are graduates…but what can another African degree do for you in SA? And any foreigner in SA will tell you that that is the truth. All of us started from below the bottom. Doing work that carries no dignity, no respect and very little financial gain. But when you have left or lost everything that you know and love and end up in a foreign land as unwelcoming in its laws and restrictions as South Africa, you have little choice available to you.

I can bet you that there is not up to 10% of South Africans who would be willing to do the menial and embarrassing work my parents and other foreigners did for as long as they did it, and for as little as they did it, were you to ask them today. So it annoys me, to the deepest part of my being when I see a South African open their mouth and cry “foul” against innocent foreigners. Let’s discuss this:

Arachnophobia – the fear of spiders.

Claustrophobia – the fear of small/tight/enclosed spaces.

Xenophobia – the fear of foreigners.

However individuals who are afraid of spiders do not go around killing spiders, rather they avoid spiders. Equally, individuals who are afraid of small and tight spaces do not go around trying to eliminate the existence of small spaces.

Thus xenophobia does not by definition imply the killing of foreigners. Yet, we continue to label this current wave of killings and murders in SA as xenophobic – and now the cooler term – “Afrophobic” attacks. Can we please just get real? What is happening in SA is a genocide, a genocide fuelled by a deep-seated hatred for which no single foreigner is responsible.

Before, you say this is too extreme, allow me to explain.

Genocide is the systematic/targeted killing of a specific tribe or race.

In South Africa’s case, this would be the senseless killings of non-South Africans, mostly those of African origin and some Pakistani, Bangladeshi and other non-African minorities.

I think the government, South African and international media are being too cowardly to call it what it is. They know what is going on in South Africa and yet they refuse to acknowledge it for fear of who knows what. Is it because their numbers are not high enough? Should we wait until a few good hundred thousand foreigners have been murdered before we speak the truth?

So now the value of human lives is being reduced to a debate on politically correct terms and phrases to protect certain interests. People are being butchered in the streets, and the country is worrying about bad PR. I hate that now, on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, everyone is now trying to say, “Oh no, it’s not all South Africans that are doing this, hey. Just a few of those people there.” South Africans are trying to distance themselves from what is happening in their own backyards as though it is of any consolation to those watching their family members being sizzled in rubber rings. As if that is what matters – true South African style.

This is not the first wave of attacks of this nature in South Africa. In fact, the 2008 attacks were much worse in terms of raw numbers of casualties suffered than these have been so far. The issue of xenophobia is not a new one in SA. However, the differentiator in 2015 is that this wave is backed by a strong ideology; that somehow these attacks can be and are justified.

An ideology that sees merit in the argument that foreigners are stealing the jobs of locals, that they are stealing their women, that these “makwerekwere” are the cause of most ills in South African society.

It is a shame how uninformed and how baseless these arguments are. Foreigners do not and CANNOT steal jobs in SA. Do you know how hard it is to get South African papers, just to get into the country – not to talk of getting a work permit and convincing any company to take on the cost of employing you as a foreigner? Unless you have some freaking scarce skills in the country – it just does not happen like that.

Secondly, just shut up and stop it. South Africans who embibe these arguments are lazy. There is a disgusting entitlement that is attached to this notion that jobs can be stolen. This implies that there are jobs waiting for you – of which there are none.

There are no freaking jobs waiting for anyone. Pick up a bucket and start washing cars. Put on your shoes and walk through your streets, sell tomatoes, eggs and tea – anything people eat, they will buy. Or pick up a book, hustle your way into university, work for a scholarship and get yourself an education. But stop this senselessness. Nobody is stealing your jobs.

I got my first job when I was 11-years-old. I worked on the school bus in my town. I collected money for the bus driver, wrote out receipts and kept order on the bus. I didn’t get paid much, but it helped me learn first that nothing comes easy, I learnt to be responsible and accountable to someone else. Secondly it helped me pay for little extramural expenses I did at school which were not the priority for my parents at the time (and rightly so). In ‘varsity, even though I had a tuition bursary, I worked two part-time jobs and one contract job for the entire three years at Stellenbosch so I could pay for my good, clothes and some additional materials etc. Yes my parents supported me as best they could, but naturally, part of growing up is that you don’t bother your parents for every Rand you need.

So people see me and my family now, several years later driving a decent car and living in an average house and they say, “Ningama kwekwere, asinifuni apha. Niqaphele, aningobalapha.”

“You are foreigners, we do not want you here. You better watch out, you are not of this place,” – unaware of and unwilling to hear of the years of struggle and hustle that came with the decent car and the average house. [Which, by the way, you can never fully own as SA law now restricts ownership of property by foreigners – but that is another discussion.]

And what has been the government’s response to the worsening unemployment and crime situation in the cities and suburbs that incites this violence and dissatisfaction amongst its people? To tighten immigration laws, border controls and any little room the foreigner may have had to just maybe survive in the menacing streets of Johannesburg. As if that is where the problem began.

Is it not the way our economy is structured? That there is limited room for unskilled labour in the workforce? That those who are not vocationally trained must then settle for employment outside of their existing areas of knowledge such as artisans, plumbers and electricians – whereas these skills are equally needed in a developing economy? That we have this thing called BEE which in practice just ensures that the Black bourgeoisie get wealthier by hook or by crook while still protecting and cushioning the impact of democracy on old, white money and big business?

Is it really the little Ethiopian man with his spaza shop that is threatening your progress na Bhuthi? Is it really the Nigerian woman who braids hair and sells Fanta that is stealing your job and place in your own land na Sisi? I can’t deal.

If none of these arguments have merit for you, then think of the fact that during apartheid, Nigeria spent thousands of dollars on the ANC protecting and moving its members across borders; Angola, Mozambique, Tanzania, Burundi, Zambia, Zimbabwe, Botswana, Kenya, Rwanda, Uganda all housed, supported and/or trained struggle heros with open arms and with no strings attached. How dare South Africans forget how much Africans did for them during apartheid. How dare you!

South Africans, go and learn your history. When you have read your history, then please teach the correct version to your children. Let them know that Africa helped put SA where it is now. Let them know that all blacks are not Xhosa or Zulu, but that that is irrelevant to the amount of dignity you accord to another human being. Teach your children that they must work for everything they want to have except your love as a parent. Teach your children that they are nothing without their neighbour – stop being selective about who Ubuntu applies to and does not. Teach them the truth about you.

The greatest enemy of the black man has always been himself. Not the colonialists. Not the apartheid architects. Only himself.

And as long as you refuse to take responsibility for where you are now, you will remain there. Kill us foreigners or not, it actually makes very little difference to your fortunes in life, people of Mzansi.

Lovelyn Nwadeyi
20 April 2015



Gbam!!
This lady just kill it,I said it that laziness and discrimination is in their blood.

3 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Birikiti: 6:07pm On Apr 24, 2015
Lovely write-up @Lovelyn, very nice. I could feel your vibes reading those words you penned down. South Africa must be such a difficult place for foreigners to live in, this current situation apart.

My opinion is that these Xenophobic (genocide you say and I agree) attacks showcase the failings of the Jacob Zuma led government. This is why they are not vehemently denouncing the attacks. What are the SA govt's plans for its citizens? Many of these attackers are a product of a derelict system that hasn't taught its citizens the dignity of hard work. They are just taking it out on innocent, studious foreigners. Such a shame!

BTW, I pity many of the Nigerian youth today who can't/wouldn't read anything more than a few lines.... such laziness! No wonder many don't pass English at the school certificate level nowadays, they are just too impatient and undisciplined to read lengthy essays and assimilate. Cultivate the habit of reading and you can start with newspaper articles, magazines etc before moving on to novels. It sure will help your development! That's for all the folks complaining about the length of the letter!

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by iphanyiuma(m): 6:09pm On Apr 24, 2015
GJames:
Absolutely fabulous. You just called it what it really is; GENOCIDE.
I don't know why no one is doing anything about this and after everything, the US would create an emotional movie and call it LAST TIME IN APRIL.
do you know the meaning of genocide?? When more that a thousand people die due to crisis it is called civil war but genocide is the big bad brother of it, its the wiping off of a lineage or generation so correct that impression
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by nifton(m): 6:11pm On Apr 24, 2015
tuoyoojo:
Best write up I have seen . Well composed. I duff my hat

Why is ther average youth so intellectually lazy. If na story of how tonto dike flash booobs, dem go read evritin from A to Z but look at this beautiful well articulated write up, some people are so lazy to digest

Like what was boldly inscribed in abu library

" He who does not read is not better than he who cannot read"
Na so bro,#If u want to hide an info from Naija youths,put it in writing and only a chunk wil read through.

2 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by nikkflexible(f): 6:12pm On Apr 24, 2015
baybeeboi:

you must be South African
why?
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by GJames(m): 6:14pm On Apr 24, 2015
iphanyiuma:
do you know the meaning of genocide?? When more that a thousand people die due to crisis it is called civil war but genocide is the big bad brother of it, its the wiping off of a lineage or generation so correct that impression
I can agree with you that its not genocide but its certainly not xenophobia.

1 Like

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Mcaise: 6:15pm On Apr 24, 2015
fretnot:
My name is Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. I am a Nigerian. Born in Nigeria to two Nigerian parents. Raised in Queenstown, Eastern Cape by those same Nigerian parents right up until I completed my Bachelors at Stellenbosch.
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. Photo: supplied

Growing up in South Africa, I was always reminded by those around me that I was different to everyone else. In primary school, I had a much darker complexion than I do now, and super white teeth – the telling marks of a foreigner that betray you even when you put on your best English accent. It is just too obvious.

I bear citizenship of both worlds. I speak fluent Xhosa, Igbo, Afrikaans and English. I can make sense of Tswana and Sotho. I enjoy a good braai, I love vetkoek and bunny-chow. I can’t get enough of Bokomo WeetBix, I love Ouma’s rusks and I can pull off my panstulas with any outfit on a lazy Saturday when I want to head to town. I am the first to break it down with the ngwaza and the dombolo at the sound of some decent house music or kwaito be it in Pick n Pay or at a party.

I can sokkie and I enjoy it (albeit with my two left feet). My darkest moments can be reversed by koeksisters and a cup of rooibos tea any day. I can jump between the high pitched and arguably annoying accents of some Constantia moms, the lank kif and apparently sophisticated English of my Hilton brothers and the heavy accents of my fellow Eastern Capers. I can attempt the fast paced, lyrical Afrikaans of my coloured brothers in the Cape and I can serve you the best butternut soup you have ever known.

I am as South African as you need me to be.

But my ability to navigate all these spaces did not just happen. Learning to blend into all these spaces was a matter of survival for me.

You see from the day I set foot in Queenstown and started primary school, it was always made very clear to me that I was an outsider. I only had white friends from my first few years in school, because the other black girls couldn’t understand why I was black but only spoke in English. They thought I thought I was better than them. So I spent most of my breaks humbly eating my peanut butter and strawberry jam sandwich, surrounded by those who had Melrose cheese and Provita Crackers with Bovril and/or marmite sandwiches in their lunchboxes. The rest of the time I spent alone, save the few brave souls of similar complexion who tried to befriend me.

What nobody knew was that for the first three years of my life in South Africa, my little brother and I barely saw my dad more than twice a month. What was he doing absent from the home, other than selling pillowcases, duvets and bedsheets, from door to door on foot through the streets, villages and side roads of the old Transkei and Ciskei? My father would leave the house on Monday mornings after him and my mom got us ready for school, and he would be gone for days and weeks, selling the few pillowcases and bedsheets he had from door to door. On foot. We were never sure when he would return. But when he did, we were always more grateful for his safety and aliveness than anything else.

From Queenstown to Cala, Umtata, Qumbu, Qoqodala, Whittlesea, Mount Fletcher, King Williamstown, Mdantsane, Bhisho, Indwe, Butterworth, Aliwal North and even as far as Matatiele and Kokstad. There are so many other places he went to that I do not even know.

That is how my parents put us through school, until they saved up enough money to open their own little shop where they then started selling sewing machines, cotton and then community phones. Then sweets and chips and take-aways; and then hair products and the list goes on and on. It was on this that I was able to go through primary school, high school, and university. My parents have no tertiary education; it was only in their late 40s that both of them decided to register for part-time studies at Walter Sisulu to get their Diplomas. Note: Diplomas.

It took them four years, because they were busy trying to keep their kids in school, and keep selling their sweets and sewing machines while attempting to dignify their efforts with a degree.

My story is not unique – it is the story of most foreigners in South Africa. Very few foreigners come into SA with skills that make them employable here. Unless you are a medical doctor, an academic and maybe an engineer or well-established businessman before coming here, your chances of getting meaningful employment in SA are as limited as those of the United States letting Al-Qaeda members off the hook – almost impossible.

Most foreigners come to SA with the ability to braid hair, carve wood, or sell fruits, veggies, clothes, fizz pops, carpets and soap before they can find their feet here. Some are graduates…but what can another African degree do for you in SA? And any foreigner in SA will tell you that that is the truth. All of us started from below the bottom. Doing work that carries no dignity, no respect and very little financial gain. But when you have left or lost everything that you know and love and end up in a foreign land as unwelcoming in its laws and restrictions as South Africa, you have little choice available to you.

I can bet you that there is not up to 10% of South Africans who would be willing to do the menial and embarrassing work my parents and other foreigners did for as long as they did it, and for as little as they did it, were you to ask them today. So it annoys me, to the deepest part of my being when I see a South African open their mouth and cry “foul” against innocent foreigners. Let’s discuss this:

Arachnophobia – the fear of spiders.

Claustrophobia – the fear of small/tight/enclosed spaces.

Xenophobia – the fear of foreigners.

However individuals who are afraid of spiders do not go around killing spiders, rather they avoid spiders. Equally, individuals who are afraid of small and tight spaces do not go around trying to eliminate the existence of small spaces.

Thus xenophobia does not by definition imply the killing of foreigners. Yet, we continue to label this current wave of killings and murders in SA as xenophobic – and now the cooler term – “Afrophobic” attacks. Can we please just get real? What is happening in SA is a genocide, a genocide fuelled by a deep-seated hatred for which no single foreigner is responsible.

Before, you say this is too extreme, allow me to explain.

Genocide is the systematic/targeted killing of a specific tribe or race.

In South Africa’s case, this would be the senseless killings of non-South Africans, mostly those of African origin and some Pakistani, Bangladeshi and other non-African minorities.

I think the government, South African and international media are being too cowardly to call it what it is. They know what is going on in South Africa and yet they refuse to acknowledge it for fear of who knows what. Is it because their numbers are not high enough? Should we wait until a few good hundred thousand foreigners have been murdered before we speak the truth?

So now the value of human lives is being reduced to a debate on politically correct terms and phrases to protect certain interests. People are being butchered in the streets, and the country is worrying about bad PR. I hate that now, on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, everyone is now trying to say, “Oh no, it’s not all South Africans that are doing this, hey. Just a few of those people there.” South Africans are trying to distance themselves from what is happening in their own backyards as though it is of any consolation to those watching their family members being sizzled in rubber rings. As if that is what matters – true South African style.

This is not the first wave of attacks of this nature in South Africa. In fact, the 2008 attacks were much worse in terms of raw numbers of casualties suffered than these have been so far. The issue of xenophobia is not a new one in SA. However, the differentiator in 2015 is that this wave is backed by a strong ideology; that somehow these attacks can be and are justified.

An ideology that sees merit in the argument that foreigners are stealing the jobs of locals, that they are stealing their women, that these “makwerekwere” are the cause of most ills in South African society.

It is a shame how uninformed and how baseless these arguments are. Foreigners do not and CANNOT steal jobs in SA. Do you know how hard it is to get South African papers, just to get into the country – not to talk of getting a work permit and convincing any company to take on the cost of employing you as a foreigner? Unless you have some freaking scarce skills in the country – it just does not happen like that.

Secondly, just shut up and stop it. South Africans who embibe these arguments are lazy. There is a disgusting entitlement that is attached to this notion that jobs can be stolen. This implies that there are jobs waiting for you – of which there are none.

There are no freaking jobs waiting for anyone. Pick up a bucket and start washing cars. Put on your shoes and walk through your streets, sell tomatoes, eggs and tea – anything people eat, they will buy. Or pick up a book, hustle your way into university, work for a scholarship and get yourself an education. But stop this senselessness. Nobody is stealing your jobs.

I got my first job when I was 11-years-old. I worked on the school bus in my town. I collected money for the bus driver, wrote out receipts and kept order on the bus. I didn’t get paid much, but it helped me learn first that nothing comes easy, I learnt to be responsible and accountable to someone else. Secondly it helped me pay for little extramural expenses I did at school which were not the priority for my parents at the time (and rightly so). In ‘varsity, even though I had a tuition bursary, I worked two part-time jobs and one contract job for the entire three years at Stellenbosch so I could pay for my good, clothes and some additional materials etc. Yes my parents supported me as best they could, but naturally, part of growing up is that you don’t bother your parents for every Rand you need.

So people see me and my family now, several years later driving a decent car and living in an average house and they say, “Ningama kwekwere, asinifuni apha. Niqaphele, aningobalapha.”

“You are foreigners, we do not want you here. You better watch out, you are not of this place,” – unaware of and unwilling to hear of the years of struggle and hustle that came with the decent car and the average house. [Which, by the way, you can never fully own as SA law now restricts ownership of property by foreigners – but that is another discussion.]

And what has been the government’s response to the worsening unemployment and crime situation in the cities and suburbs that incites this violence and dissatisfaction amongst its people? To tighten immigration laws, border controls and any little room the foreigner may have had to just maybe survive in the menacing streets of Johannesburg. As if that is where the problem began.

Is it not the way our economy is structured? That there is limited room for unskilled labour in the workforce? That those who are not vocationally trained must then settle for employment outside of their existing areas of knowledge such as artisans, plumbers and electricians – whereas these skills are equally needed in a developing economy? That we have this thing called BEE which in practice just ensures that the Black bourgeoisie get wealthier by hook or by crook while still protecting and cushioning the impact of democracy on old, white money and big business?

Is it really the little Ethiopian man with his spaza shop that is threatening your progress na Bhuthi? Is it really the Nigerian woman who braids hair and sells Fanta that is stealing your job and place in your own land na Sisi? I can’t deal.

If none of these arguments have merit for you, then think of the fact that during apartheid, Nigeria spent thousands of dollars on the ANC protecting and moving its members across borders; Angola, Mozambique, Tanzania, Burundi, Zambia, Zimbabwe, Botswana, Kenya, Rwanda, Uganda all housed, supported and/or trained struggle heros with open arms and with no strings attached. How dare South Africans forget how much Africans did for them during apartheid. How dare you!

South Africans, go and learn your history. When you have read your history, then please teach the correct version to your children. Let them know that Africa helped put SA where it is now. Let them know that all blacks are not Xhosa or Zulu, but that that is irrelevant to the amount of dignity you accord to another human being. Teach your children that they must work for everything they want to have except your love as a parent. Teach your children that they are nothing without their neighbour – stop being selective about who Ubuntu applies to and does not. Teach them the truth about you.

The greatest enemy of the black man has always been himself. Not the colonialists. Not the apartheid architects. Only himself.

And as long as you refuse to take responsibility for where you are now, you will remain there. Kill us foreigners or not, it actually makes very little difference to your fortunes in life, people of Mzansi.

Lovelyn Nwadeyi
20 April 2015

A beautiful mind..

A proud Nigerian model.

God bless your parents for their contribution
to this world in the person of Lovelyn Nwadeyi

6 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by garriboy(m): 6:16pm On Apr 24, 2015
fretnot:
My name is Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. I am a Nigerian. Born in Nigeria to two Nigerian parents. Raised in Queenstown, Eastern Cape by those same Nigerian parents right up until I completed my Bachelors at Stellenbosch.
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi
Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi. Photo: supplied

Growing up in South Africa, I was always reminded by those around me that I was different to everyone else. In primary school, I had a much darker complexion than I do now, and super white teeth – the telling marks of a foreigner that betray you even when you put on your best English accent. It is just too obvious.

I bear citizenship of both worlds. I speak fluent Xhosa, Igbo, Afrikaans and English. I can make sense of Tswana and Sotho. I enjoy a good braai, I love vetkoek and bunny-chow. I can’t get enough of Bokomo WeetBix, I love Ouma’s rusks and I can pull off my panstulas with any outfit on a lazy Saturday when I want to head to town. I am the first to break it down with the ngwaza and the dombolo at the sound of some decent house music or kwaito be it in Pick n Pay or at a party.

I can sokkie and I enjoy it (albeit with my two left feet). My darkest moments can be reversed by koeksisters and a cup of rooibos tea any day. I can jump between the high pitched and arguably annoying accents of some Constantia moms, the lank kif and apparently sophisticated English of my Hilton brothers and the heavy accents of my fellow Eastern Capers. I can attempt the fast paced, lyrical Afrikaans of my coloured brothers in the Cape and I can serve you the best butternut soup you have ever known.

I am as South African as you need me to be.

But my ability to navigate all these spaces did not just happen. Learning to blend into all these spaces was a matter of survival for me.

You see from the day I set foot in Queenstown and started primary school, it was always made very clear to me that I was an outsider. I only had white friends from my first few years in school, because the other black girls couldn’t understand why I was black but only spoke in English. They thought I thought I was better than them. So I spent most of my breaks humbly eating my peanut butter and strawberry jam sandwich, surrounded by those who had Melrose cheese and Provita Crackers with Bovril and/or marmite sandwiches in their lunchboxes. The rest of the time I spent alone, save the few brave souls of similar complexion who tried to befriend me.

What nobody knew was that for the first three years of my life in South Africa, my little brother and I barely saw my dad more than twice a month. What was he doing absent from the home, other than selling pillowcases, duvets and bedsheets, from door to door on foot through the streets, villages and side roads of the old Transkei and Ciskei? My father would leave the house on Monday mornings after him and my mom got us ready for school, and he would be gone for days and weeks, selling the few pillowcases and bedsheets he had from door to door. On foot. We were never sure when he would return. But when he did, we were always more grateful for his safety and aliveness than anything else.

From Queenstown to Cala, Umtata, Qumbu, Qoqodala, Whittlesea, Mount Fletcher, King Williamstown, Mdantsane, Bhisho, Indwe, Butterworth, Aliwal North and even as far as Matatiele and Kokstad. There are so many other places he went to that I do not even know.

That is how my parents put us through school, until they saved up enough money to open their own little shop where they then started selling sewing machines, cotton and then community phones. Then sweets and chips and take-aways; and then hair products and the list goes on and on. It was on this that I was able to go through primary school, high school, and university. My parents have no tertiary education; it was only in their late 40s that both of them decided to register for part-time studies at Walter Sisulu to get their Diplomas. Note: Diplomas.

It took them four years, because they were busy trying to keep their kids in school, and keep selling their sweets and sewing machines while attempting to dignify their efforts with a degree.

My story is not unique – it is the story of most foreigners in South Africa. Very few foreigners come into SA with skills that make them employable here. Unless you are a medical doctor, an academic and maybe an engineer or well-established businessman before coming here, your chances of getting meaningful employment in SA are as limited as those of the United States letting Al-Qaeda members off the hook – almost impossible.

Most foreigners come to SA with the ability to braid hair, carve wood, or sell fruits, veggies, clothes, fizz pops, carpets and soap before they can find their feet here. Some are graduates…but what can another African degree do for you in SA? And any foreigner in SA will tell you that that is the truth. All of us started from below the bottom. Doing work that carries no dignity, no respect and very little financial gain. But when you have left or lost everything that you know and love and end up in a foreign land as unwelcoming in its laws and restrictions as South Africa, you have little choice available to you.

I can bet you that there is not up to 10% of South Africans who would be willing to do the menial and embarrassing work my parents and other foreigners did for as long as they did it, and for as little as they did it, were you to ask them today. So it annoys me, to the deepest part of my being when I see a South African open their mouth and cry “foul” against innocent foreigners. Let’s discuss this:

Arachnophobia – the fear of spiders.

Claustrophobia – the fear of small/tight/enclosed spaces.

Xenophobia – the fear of foreigners.

However individuals who are afraid of spiders do not go around killing spiders, rather they avoid spiders. Equally, individuals who are afraid of small and tight spaces do not go around trying to eliminate the existence of small spaces.

Thus xenophobia does not by definition imply the killing of foreigners. Yet, we continue to label this current wave of killings and murders in SA as xenophobic – and now the cooler term – “Afrophobic” attacks. Can we please just get real? What is happening in SA is a genocide, a genocide fuelled by a deep-seated hatred for which no single foreigner is responsible.

Before, you say this is too extreme, allow me to explain.

Genocide is the systematic/targeted killing of a specific tribe or race.

In South Africa’s case, this would be the senseless killings of non-South Africans, mostly those of African origin and some Pakistani, Bangladeshi and other non-African minorities.

I think the government, South African and international media are being too cowardly to call it what it is. They know what is going on in South Africa and yet they refuse to acknowledge it for fear of who knows what. Is it because their numbers are not high enough? Should we wait until a few good hundred thousand foreigners have been murdered before we speak the truth?

So now the value of human lives is being reduced to a debate on politically correct terms and phrases to protect certain interests. People are being butchered in the streets, and the country is worrying about bad PR. I hate that now, on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, everyone is now trying to say, “Oh no, it’s not all South Africans that are doing this, hey. Just a few of those people there.” South Africans are trying to distance themselves from what is happening in their own backyards as though it is of any consolation to those watching their family members being sizzled in rubber rings. As if that is what matters – true South African style.

This is not the first wave of attacks of this nature in South Africa. In fact, the 2008 attacks were much worse in terms of raw numbers of casualties suffered than these have been so far. The issue of xenophobia is not a new one in SA. However, the differentiator in 2015 is that this wave is backed by a strong ideology; that somehow these attacks can be and are justified.

An ideology that sees merit in the argument that foreigners are stealing the jobs of locals, that they are stealing their women, that these “makwerekwere” are the cause of most ills in South African society.

It is a shame how uninformed and how baseless these arguments are. Foreigners do not and CANNOT steal jobs in SA. Do you know how hard it is to get South African papers, just to get into the country – not to talk of getting a work permit and convincing any company to take on the cost of employing you as a foreigner? Unless you have some freaking scarce skills in the country – it just does not happen like that.

Secondly, just shut up and stop it. South Africans who embibe these arguments are lazy. There is a disgusting entitlement that is attached to this notion that jobs can be stolen. This implies that there are jobs waiting for you – of which there are none.

There are no freaking jobs waiting for anyone. Pick up a bucket and start washing cars. Put on your shoes and walk through your streets, sell tomatoes, eggs and tea – anything people eat, they will buy. Or pick up a book, hustle your way into university, work for a scholarship and get yourself an education. But stop this senselessness. Nobody is stealing your jobs.

I got my first job when I was 11-years-old. I worked on the school bus in my town. I collected money for the bus driver, wrote out receipts and kept order on the bus. I didn’t get paid much, but it helped me learn first that nothing comes easy, I learnt to be responsible and accountable to someone else. Secondly it helped me pay for little extramural expenses I did at school which were not the priority for my parents at the time (and rightly so). In ‘varsity, even though I had a tuition bursary, I worked two part-time jobs and one contract job for the entire three years at Stellenbosch so I could pay for my good, clothes and some additional materials etc. Yes my parents supported me as best they could, but naturally, part of growing up is that you don’t bother your parents for every Rand you need.

So people see me and my family now, several years later driving a decent car and living in an average house and they say, “Ningama kwekwere, asinifuni apha. Niqaphele, aningobalapha.”

“You are foreigners, we do not want you here. You better watch out, you are not of this place,” – unaware of and unwilling to hear of the years of struggle and hustle that came with the decent car and the average house. [Which, by the way, you can never fully own as SA law now restricts ownership of property by foreigners – but that is another discussion.]

And what has been the government’s response to the worsening unemployment and crime situation in the cities and suburbs that incites this violence and dissatisfaction amongst its people? To tighten immigration laws, border controls and any little room the foreigner may have had to just maybe survive in the menacing streets of Johannesburg. As if that is where the problem began.

Is it not the way our economy is structured? That there is limited room for unskilled labour in the workforce? That those who are not vocationally trained must then settle for employment outside of their existing areas of knowledge such as artisans, plumbers and electricians – whereas these skills are equally needed in a developing economy? That we have this thing called BEE which in practice just ensures that the Black bourgeoisie get wealthier by hook or by crook while still protecting and cushioning the impact of democracy on old, white money and big business?

Is it really the little Ethiopian man with his spaza shop that is threatening your progress na Bhuthi? Is it really the Nigerian woman who braids hair and sells Fanta that is stealing your job and place in your own land na Sisi? I can’t deal.

If none of these arguments have merit for you, then think of the fact that during apartheid, Nigeria spent thousands of dollars on the ANC protecting and moving its members across borders; Angola, Mozambique, Tanzania, Burundi, Zambia, Zimbabwe, Botswana, Kenya, Rwanda, Uganda all housed, supported and/or trained struggle heros with open arms and with no strings attached. How dare South Africans forget how much Africans did for them during apartheid. How dare you!

South Africans, go and learn your history. When you have read your history, then please teach the correct version to your children. Let them know that Africa helped put SA where it is now. Let them know that all blacks are not Xhosa or Zulu, but that that is irrelevant to the amount of dignity you accord to another human being. Teach your children that they must work for everything they want to have except your love as a parent. Teach your children that they are nothing without their neighbour – stop being selective about who Ubuntu applies to and does not. Teach them the truth about you.

The greatest enemy of the black man has always been himself. Not the colonialists. Not the apartheid architects. Only himself.

And as long as you refuse to take responsibility for where you are now, you will remain there. Kill us foreigners or not, it actually makes very little difference to your fortunes in life, people of Mzansi.

Lovelyn Nwadeyi
20 April 2015
I usually don't read posts dat are dis long but I was somehow capativated by this. Every line, every paragraph speaks the truth. I only wish those involved in these attacks would read this and get a little sense. God bless you sister.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by merricherios(f): 6:17pm On Apr 24, 2015
this is jst beautiful and heart warming. my dear sister U have really educated me for real, i now know that all what i hv been hearing over the years about southafricans are not fabricated, but shaming truth of how barbaric those lot can be. it is well, we will survive and take our stand as the most populous country in Africa and set the pace for our brothers (other african countries to follow)... God bless the Federal Republic of Nigeria.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by phantom(m): 6:17pm On Apr 24, 2015
It's a shame when serious topics/posts like this are put up and people come on here lamenting about the length of that topic or post.
No intelligent response or reply other than to 'book space' and type nonsense.
Seun has to do something about these people who are incapable of contributing anything meaningful to topics of this nature. It's a pity indeed and goes to show how low we have sunk as a nation as regards EDUCATION.

@OP......lovely post. This is a serious issue that cannot be wished away. Unfortunately, it appears that the SA citizens involved in this madness are in the majority. But what worries me is the subtle encouragement they appear to be getting from their fellow countrymen who are not part of this violence BUT support it via their silence.
Let the south Africans remember their businesses in other countries. MTN & DSTV are ripping us off but no Nigerian has raised hell. Let them move on. Apartheid ended about 20yrs ago but they still behave like 'oppressed people'

4 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by ShortBlackBoy(m): 6:17pm On Apr 24, 2015
[quote author=fretnot post=33066293][/quote]

Beautiful writing Nne. I know you have written in pain and from the heart yet as I read on, I shamelessly wished it wouldn't end.

If there was a 'Mama Nigeria cum Mama Africa', your words would be her voice; your pain her tears.

It is difficult to read your write-up without getting emotional.

In the midst of your persecution, in the midst of your struggle, your pain and the hatred that surrounds you, you hold your head up high; taking pride in your family, your hard work, your perseverance, your education, your achievements and your writing.

This should be a model for not just foreigners being persecuted and subjugated in South Africa, but for virtuous people all over the world who are going through one struggle or another.

In fact, you are a woman of virtue. I am proud to know that your lineage is of the land of the rising sun -Nigeria.

My sister, things are not easy in Nigeria but you will do just fine. It's a lot better than it used to be. These days some of us can get jobs without knowing anyone, good paying jobs too. There are opportunities everywhere for those who can see them. A lot of people who were nobodies are doing very well now. From celebrity photograhers to tailors, decorators, designers, even mechanics etc.. Our market is so big that everything sells once you can guarantee good customer service and quality products. Only lazy people here also cry out that there are no opportunities. There are so many things you can do. You can even buy goods and sell on konga, jumia etc. Heck, you can even build your own if you have the focus.

My sister come back home. With this your grammar, blogs would love to hire you; if you speak as well as you write, TV stations, radio stations...

SO WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING IN THAT GOD FORSAKEN COUNTRY? ARE YOU WAITING TILL THEY KILL YOU TOO? Please come home. You will do just fine.

As for those no good for nothing lazy South African blacks, I can't waste any words on them.

8 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by yemmynoni: 6:18pm On Apr 24, 2015
abeg who read this story
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by cutecanson(m): 6:18pm On Apr 24, 2015
Beautiful...nice write up...hope Jacob Zuma and SA's will read dis
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by DeeMain(m): 6:18pm On Apr 24, 2015
I'm having goose bumps reading this.

Wow.

Lovelyn Chidinma Nwadeyi, are u still single, nwanyi oma?

******

This story is uniquely South African, yet not uniquely South African. The question should be, "What is wrong with the black man?" Africa is a story of tribal hate, wars and killings too. Even in Nigeria our history is replete with tribalism, ethnocentricism, 'xenophobia', religious riots, ethnic killings, pogroms, even genocide.

While we deservedly condemn SA for this evil they are inflicting on their fellow African brothers and sisters, let us also spare a thought for how we sometimes treat and hate each other in this country.

#TeamLoveYourNeighbour

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Nobody: 6:20pm On Apr 24, 2015
yemmynoni:
abeg who read this story
I do! cool
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Mcaise: 6:21pm On Apr 24, 2015
Afarozy:
Who do u want to read dis ur story. Why not us it n write novel instead of taking anoda peoples space

Instead of taking anoda peoples space
shocked shocked ah ah??

who taught u dis nasty grammer??

Firm proof u actually need to read more.

What the heck are our youths turning into?

Ah ah very toxic construction of english yet in a failed attempt to criticize ur helper.

Geeezzzz..

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by dstar01(m): 6:21pm On Apr 24, 2015
nikkflexible:
Biko..i need the summarized version of this novel...am too lazy to read this one this afternoon jare

I'm sure you are not as lazy as those fucking retards South Africans so try and read the Write up. grin
nikkflexible:
Biko..i need the summarized version of this novel...am too lazy to read this one this afternoon jare

I'm sure you are not as lazy as those fucking retards South Africans so try and read the Write up.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by baybeeboi: 6:22pm On Apr 24, 2015
nikkflexible:
why?
we find lazy people in South Africa
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Nobody: 6:22pm On Apr 24, 2015
Well done. You've said it all.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by baybeeboi: 6:26pm On Apr 24, 2015
phantom:
It's a shame when serious topics/posts like this are put up and people come on here lamenting about the length of that topic or post.
do you know how many people here have to steal time from work or what ever engagement to see whats goin on in Nairaland?
Bros,everybody cannot be idle anytime you are.
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by BSF: 6:27pm On Apr 24, 2015
You need to read it through to understand the communication of the lady.

If you cannot read through , how can you go through in life?
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Fynline(m): 6:27pm On Apr 24, 2015
Moral lesson- never help a lazy man!

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by skeendyke: 6:29pm On Apr 24, 2015
After reading this beautiful piece I expected to read comments addressing the writer's points only to be shocked by the responses of dullards who do not have the dignity to hide their poor reading culture in a public forum especially when it deals with an ache that is common to us all Africans. Shame.

Imagine our brothers and sisters being the objects of hate and being hacked to death in a foreign land because their only crime was being naturally industrious. It is not something to be treated with slight.

The writer has shown us South Africa(ns) through her eyes, her years of experience. It cannot be ignored. She redefined terms and showed us the true reason behind the killings of foreigners - South Africans are a lazy bunch of people full of excuses for their deplorable condition. Moreso, that the south African government is unwilling to do anything about this barbaric attacks speaks volumes about their unreliabilty of protection of foreigners. They (my opinion) may not have started the fire that kills the foreigners but they will not quench it since it is in their common interest.

I came to the conclusion, after reading this write up, that despite the fact we share the same black skin, it is plain the bond of brotherhood and unity is lacking between South Africans and Africans. Only if we could see the future we would have left those pathetic lazy ingrates to rot in the hell of apartheid. They deserved it and will continue to deserve that slave treatment. Mandela struggled to free a beast from a well suiting cage of slavery and victimisation. Now the beast is on rampage. It is only logical to put it back in its cage.

7 Likes

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by dstar01(m): 6:30pm On Apr 24, 2015
nikkflexible:
Biko..i need the summarized version of this novel...am too lazy to read this one this afternoon jare
Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by funmilade4real(m): 6:32pm On Apr 24, 2015
MKO4ever:
This letter too long jare

It is not too long, you might just be one of d Zulus - Lazy

1 Like

Re: Open Letter From A Nigerian Lady To South Africans by Nobody: 6:32pm On Apr 24, 2015
Proudly Nigeria!!I Love my country with full Passion

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