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How To Love Your Jamaican Man - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

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How To Love Your Jamaican Man by pintos(m): 11:00am On Sep 09, 2006
Someone sent this to me and wish to share with you grin grin grin grin grin



How To Love Your Jamaican Man


1. Never ask where yu man has been, where him coming from or where him going Don't always feel him going to another woman. If yu treated him right he will soon come back. If him don't come back, well you have to work pon dat!

2. Always make sure de food deh pon de table when him come thru de door. Member, "regular fried dumpling keeps your man a humping".

3. Don't forget the "Irish Moss" and "Guinness". A nuff ah dem like pork, but just don't call it pork , yu mad! Call it a fancy foreign name like ham or franks! Ah it dem mother did grow dem up pon.

4. Never get upset if he accidentally sleeps with yuh friend, sister, or even mother. That only means he is a good man, dem would have never slept with him if him was worthless! Is dem fault fi a pressure him!

5. Never tell yuh man seh yu pregnant - well, not til yuh hide him passport!

6. Never ask! how many baby mother yuh man have. Dis may lead to embarrassment because him may have lost count.

7. If him grab yuh up! Tell him that's not how to show love, some think that is the way but don't call de police. It don't mek no sense, because you always end up bailing him out of jail.

8. Never tell yuh man is not your real hair! Dem love long hair gal. Keep telling him dat you're half-Chinese or yu have Indjun in yuh family.

9. Don't listen to your girlfriends advice, especially if dem don't have no man. How can someone with no man tell you how to keep one. Dem always telling you that 'him controlling yu'. She just want someone to keep her company because she have no man. Some of dem even have funny intentions.

10. Never ask to drive your man's car, or give him directions, or tell him to ask for directions when he is lost. Him soon find him way! Grin and bear it.

11. Never ask for your man's home number and address , some ladies get this str! ange idea after seeing their man fe three years and having several children for him that this somehow entitles dem to dis privileged information. Be realistic! The relationship is still in its early stages. However, your man might feel generous and offer up his cell phone or pager digits. Be grateful!!!


Everything Irie

AMC
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by Seun(m): 11:08am On Sep 09, 2006
Stupidest thing I've ever read.
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by bluenubian(f): 11:08am On Sep 09, 2006
grin thanks but i dont plan on dating a jamaican guy anytime soon
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by iice(f): 11:54am On Sep 09, 2006
Funny grin grin
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by mrmayor(m): 11:58am On Sep 09, 2006
Stereotypical about Jamaican men but some of it is true especially about baby-mamas,my former neighbour Roy has 3 baby-mamas with 11 children wink
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by Nobody: 4:09am On Feb 21, 2011
lol@ the thread.

I love Jamaican men *sighs*. . .sometimes. grin grin


mrmayor:

Stereotypical about Jamaican men but some of it is true especially about baby-mamas,my former neighbour Roy has 3 baby-mamas with 11 children wink

hmmm. just like African polygamists. wink
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by vincent10(m): 4:23am On Feb 21, 2011
*still searching for d joke, *
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by vincent10(m): 4:25am On Feb 21, 2011
*still searching for d joke, *
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by Nelson6(m): 9:26am On Feb 21, 2011
lol not bad grin
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by lysaa(f): 1:57pm On Feb 21, 2011
Seun:

Stupidest thing I've ever read.
Ouch! That hurts.
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by Nobody: 5:51pm On Feb 21, 2011
Nelson**:

lol not bad grin


You're not in Jamaica lol
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by Jeel: 6:41pm On Feb 21, 2011
Weldone,dead funny
Re: How To Love Your Jamaican Man by roselynbas(f): 5:13pm On Feb 23, 2011
funny! grin

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