Frustrated - Family (2)

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Frustrated - Family (2) - Nairaland

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I Become Broke, Frustrated Whenever I Have Sex With My Wife / My Wife Is Driving Me Crazy??? Getting Frustrated Here / A Frustrated Woman (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Frustrated by focus7: 5:57am On May 01, 2015

Take charge of your marriage, women are not remote control that you expect to pick up, press a button and expect a response. Sometime you just have to make your woman do things the way it should be done without hurting her in the process, with time she will come to live with the reality that you are in charge.

Re: Frustrated by netotse(m): 4:44pm On May 01, 2015

Stillfire:

Wow that story...

He sent me various emails saying he doesn't know what had gotten into him. That I'm too independent and don't allow him to feel like a man, and I don't ask about his movements like a normal wife. that all I do is cook, clean, make money and go to the gym to look good for others so he allowed me to be married to myself.

Nigerian men are scary! These men scare me for real, I cannot lie. See his reasons.
Shivers down my spine, goosebumps on my goosebumps.
Hanhan... I'm speechless

Hey, Stilly of the hot legs grin

Let me help you translate the italicized portion. You don't speak "man"...I do.

It reads, "You did not make me feel important/needed"...simple and short. Not everyman will require a woman does those specific things, but everyman will require a woman make him feel needed/important. Don't pay too much attention to the words and end up missing the message.

Disclaimer: Cheating is wrong, the dude was wrong to have cheated

1 Like

Re: Frustrated by Nobody: 4:51pm On May 01, 2015

Ewuro4:
I
Sad story.
Not condoning excuses for his infidelity but they were seperated for six months.
Zion was there 24/7 with her man ... Abeg , what's his excuse?

You're very right; we will never know what human beings want.

My dear you have said it all
The only way forward is to understand what each partner wants and try to fulfil each others needs

A man was complaining about his wife being too "good". I thought it was a very strange thing to say, but when he started talking I understood better
According to him ,she was too prim and proper for him. A perfectionist.
She wont go to bed until everything was in their right places no matter how late.
He complained that he is not allowed to touch her hair after a new hairdo and at the weekend she would jump out of bed very early to do housework and cook and cook when all he wanted was to spend some time with her after a hard week.
I said maybe he wasnt helping with the housework and she was just pacing herself but he said that he did, but whatever he did wasnt good enough and she would redo all so what was the point.

He said that she cooked all his meals and she didnt like eating out because she felt that it was a waste of money and didnt trust anyone elses cooking

Basically he said he was finding it difficult connecting with her. He said a lot of things including calling her inflexible and the relationship boring and to be honest what he said stopped my in my tracks. I said to myself See this man complaining about an almost perfect woman, but when I thought about it, he probably knew what he was talkking about. He wanted to be married to a human and not a robot. He probably sees easy going women at work but at home he comes home to a stern principal. I must admit, I learnt some things from what he said.

Affairs are wrong on so many levels as they dont solve the problem, but sometimes people are tempted due to a lack of something. Its the will power and grace that couples going through issues need to pray for to be able to resolve these thiings inhouse instead of falling into the tempation. It is well.

Re: Frustrated by edwife(f): 6:11pm On May 01, 2015

Ewuro4:
I
Sad story.
Not condoning excuses for his infidelity but they were seperated for six months.
Zion was there 24/7 with her man ... Abeg , what's his excuse?

You're very right; we will never know what human beings want.

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 6:24pm On May 01, 2015

Ewuro4:
OP you're allowed to vent. Hit the gym and blow off some steam. It's okay. over a decade hallmark and can tell you it wasn't all a smooth ride, lots of patience and letting things slide for peace sake. But you deserve to be happy and nagging about it won't help you either. It takes two but since you're the one mostly yearning for attention and change, I'd advice you to work on your communication with her, call her , maybe your hands on her nape during convo, rubbing softly ( that's one of his tricks and my head just cool down and I surrender )... My lovely wife.... Blah blah ( you know what she's complaining about so adress them with that approach) and talk about it. Try it. It gets better with time.
****

That reminds me Edwife.. I watched "Keeping my man" and didn't like the ending atall. I mean the strongest couple's marriage broke while the crawlcrawl ones worked out? not cool. Not cool atall. I don't like that. It broke my heart

I too didnt like the end,

so loved monalisa&kenneth okolie_

1 Like

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 6:54pm On May 01, 2015

@Tearoses... You couldn't have said it any better. If couples can openly speak up and talk to each other about their likes and dislikes. I think the family unit will tremendously florish.

The story you narrated was one hell of a choking marriage. Sudden changes in lifestyle, strict rules in the comfort of my own sanctuary, in contrast to what couples are used to can kill a spouse phsycologically The whole idea is to compliment each other.

Another suitable example , was a friend that changed all the family diet undecided

if you open her fridge, all you see is nuts, goat milk, tofu , and free rage chicken grin

No KFC/mcD/restaurant to avoid 'junk & unhealthy food' , it would be ideal if that was their usual routine but it wasn't. her soft spoken, sheltered husband that comes right back home from work at 5:30pm suddenly has to hang out with friends every night. Even, myself had to grab a bite before I visit her.

It takes two really, changes without seeking her spouse's consent or input and thinks everything will be rosy in her relationship is looking for a long term trouble.

I talked to her but you know how our sisters can be.

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 7:03pm On May 01, 2015

ivyT:

I too didnt like the end,

so loved monalisa&kenneth okolie_

Who are they? Sorry Im not familiar with these people.

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 7:47pm On May 01, 2015

Ewuro4:

Who are they? Sorry Im not familiar with these people.

monalisa chinda&kenneth okolie_the light skinned lady who always refused her husband sex.

Rukky sanda&Ramsey nouah_perfect marriage but the husband was cheating

Ini edo&Alex okubo_the husband didnt want to experiment

do u watch naija movies at all

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 8:17pm On May 01, 2015

ivyT, I watch fair amount Nigerian movies, just not acquainted with the actors names. Esp new ones.

I saw 'Champagne' yesterday , lot like Demi Moore's indecent proposal. But a perfect twist to it.

Re: Frustrated by bukatyne(f): 9:35pm On May 01, 2015

@OP:

Gotten a lot of nice advices here

Try to get through to your wife.

What do you want?
What does she want?

And forget all the stereotyped roles you hear about.

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 9:56pm On May 01, 2015

Ewuro4:
ivyT, I watch fair amount Nigerian movies, just not acquainted with the actors names. Esp new ones.

I saw 'Champagne' yesterday , lot like Demi Moore's indecent proposal. But a perfect twist to it.

yea,i had to google indecentproposal to c d 'a lot like'..
U cld check out _Knocking On Heavens Door cos e make sense die**

Re: Frustrated by Stillfire: 1:21am On May 02, 2015

netotse:

Hey, Stilly of the hot legs

Let me help you translate the italicized portion. You don't speak "man"...I do.

It reads, "You did not make me feel important/needed"...simple and short. Not everyman will require a woman does those specific things, but everyman will require a woman make him feel needed/important. Don't pay too much attention to the words and end up missing the message.

Disclaimer: Cheating is wrong, the dude was wrong to have cheated

Who is this? cheesy

Lol @ I don't speak man. cheesy

I not surprised though. I've always known the more needy you are the more manly Nigerian men feel. cheesy

Re: Frustrated by lovinam: 8:43am On May 02, 2015

See as una just tell the story finish. Oya kontinu

Ewuro4:

Hmm .... I agree with the paradigm but a bit rattled by how it all played out hence the bad reviews the movie got.

so what's wrong trying to support your friends and still maintain a good home? Afteral it was from her goodness of heart and her home is not lacking as a result of this. Tokunbo is sexually satisfied and his meals were adequately supplied on his office table and on top, great desert a man could ever asked for. This same lady cleans after him and always waiting for him every freaking night. I guess my q is; Where did she go wrong?

You really believe that line of story? I don't.

Re: Frustrated by netotse(m): 8:46am On May 02, 2015

Stillfire:

Who is this?
Lol @ I don't speak man.
I not surprised though. I've always known the more needy you are the more manly Nigerian men feel.

Some random guy with a long memory and a big mouth...ignore me cheesy

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 5:58pm On May 02, 2015

ivyT:

yea,i had to google indecentproposal to c d 'a lot like'..
U cld check out _Knocking On Heavens Door cos e make sense die**

Seen it. Like all the featured songs esp 'Free'

lovinam:
See as una just tell the story finish. Oya kontinu

That's pretty much everything grin

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 8:46pm On May 02, 2015

Ewuro4:

Seen it. Like all the featured songs esp 'Free'

That's pretty much everything

lovelorn &before 30_u shld try these too...

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 10:30pm On May 02, 2015

ivyT:

lovelorn &before 30_u shld try these too...

Lovelorn : check

Before 30 , not yet. Will watch later.

Thanks!

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 11:09pm On May 02, 2015

Ewuro4:

Lovelorn : check
Before 30 , not yet. Will watch later.
Thanks!

finding june,forgetting mercy,the meeting,house of gold_nd lots more

m a movie person..oops!

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 11:16pm On May 02, 2015

ivyT:

finding mercy,forgetting june,the meeting,house of gold_nd lots more

m a movie person..oops!

Re: Frustrated by ivyT(f): 11:18pm On May 02, 2015

ivyT:

finding june,forgetting mercy,the meeting,house of gold_nd lots more

m a movie person..oops!

finding mercy,forgetting june_my bad

Re: Frustrated by Ewuro4: 11:26pm On May 02, 2015

ivyT:

finding june,forgetting mercy,the meeting,house of gold_nd lots more

m a movie person..oops!

Forgetting June , check
Others not yet. grin

well except 'house of gold' , the movie was dragging like molasses grin

I mean 'get to the end already' , so I stopped watching it.

Err you are a movie person, wow. 'll holla at ya when I'm done with those grin

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