I was at the filling station again this morning as early as 7am to buy fuel only to observe the same things that have been the order of the day at the fuel stations since the fuel scarcity. The ordinary man can hardly buy fuel. Infact, this is the period I knew there in this country, all fingers are not equal. So here are the 3 types of people that can easily buy fuel without stress:

1) THE ALAYES: Mehn...this men are strong ooo....You dare not stand on their way to getting fuel. They usually buy to resell... I can be on cue for 4 hours while an Alaye can go more than 7 trips with 50 litre gallon!.....Omo...for once, I wished I get this kind strength....Muscle nd deep voice good ooo....I go soon start working on my own muscle against the future fuel scarcities.

2) THE STAFF: This set of people comprises of the untouchables. The ones that can spend the money...extra money. The deal is usually done inside the office before the station mnager himself would come out and fill their numerous gallons. After which, he goes back to the office. I bin wan claim staff for conoil this morning, the manager asked me, "are you a staff?"...I said "yes"....The next question he asked me shocked me..."are you from Adenuga?"...Oga mi...I just dogde my head....

3) THE SMART DUDES: OK..i fall into this category...You see, I run a Cyber Cafe and we are the most hit since this fuel scarcity due to the nature of our business. No light, no business. Si I can't afford to stay on the line the whole day. But since I no be alaye, I gat to find a way out. Most times, what I do is that when I see the line is much, I calmly scan through the cars on cue. I would go close to one of the owners and engage him/her in a discussion...make the laugh and like me instanta...then before their turn go reach, I would just casually ask them to put my gallon inside their car....hahahha, it always works like magic...

Feel free to add yours..

The pregnant woman

The bribers : those that pay 500naira to enter from the exit gate

iyatrustee:
The pregnant woman

Other women in the queue will not allow her.

4. the beautiful and curvy ladies

Who go see better thing and comot eye? these types of lady will have upper hand to buy petrol easily because she will just look at the queue and sight any guy in the front queue and give him signal.

then u will hear this kind of conversion after the guy asked the lady to come and queue in his front------->>>>>

Crowd 1:---- e be like say u dey craze abi, you better tell that Lady to join the queue from the back.(with sobo face)

the guy will reply ---: no ooo she dey my front before o she go buy recharge card

the guy will only escape bashing if he is a giant with bigger muscles

I heard of the strike and decided to buy large quantity of fuel to sustain my services till government settles with the marketers, only to find out that nothing changed.

Why is there no fuel scarcity in Southeast?

No queue, no price change though sells at N97 - N100 and some N87

Is Aba depot now working at optimum?

4) D one who will always insult d president and kip chanting change
Wen I see dem for station, I no dhe buy fuel again
Datz to tell u how I hate "change"
* "change" is not d same as change
Say no to "change"
We nid transformation
I pray and hope we won't regret voting out transformation

THE ARMY

Thugnificient:
THE ARMY

Yes..you are right...the army and police easily get fuel...but they go like ginger small.....flog people and scatter kegs in line just to show they are strong...stupid mofos!

Friends and Relatives of the fuel attendant

pukena:


Yes..you are right...the army and police easily get fuel...but they go like ginger small.....flog people and scatter kegs in line just to show they are strong...stupid mofos!

The Army need not to do those before they get fuel. Just their appearance will flog people psychologically. The Army will dissapear in a filling station, in re-appear with fuel in just 3 mins.

Tallesty1:
Other women in the queue will not allow her.

Most times, it is the men that would fight for you and there is little or nothing the women can do. I have succesfully used this in buying fuel. Just this Monday, i needed to buy fuel in a gallon and had tried for like 30mins until a man saw me and started abusing the fuel attendant of being a wicked man. It worked and i was attended to within minutes!

The Agberos/area boys, if the fuel attendants really want peace to reign or value their station the earlier they attend to them the better for them and other customers.

I want to SHOUT GABO!!!
Hail My Snipers trained by GEJ
And my Interim Govt guys
Especially those that said GEJ has been president for 6 years, but we just marked Yar'adua's 5th year anniversary.



To Oando Oil
Conoil
Danta ta and Pinnacle oil this space is for y'all














Jungle tins

one of ma skinny friends got an igbarun (slap) of life from one agbero for trying to form omo mushin cos of long queue .... ..
him neck still dey make (kaun,kaun sound)...i pity am

Trailer falls on SUV, Bus, Keke Napep in Mushi Olosa, Lagos [See Photos]
http://ngreports.com/trailer-falls-on-suv-bus-keke-napep-in-mushi-olosa-lagos-see-photos/
Click above to see more pix

I de follow put gallon for boot o!! Those mean NNPC staff go just look you
'madam, put ya gallon for ya boot' . Like say dem buy me car.

I go just jeje find person with car and beg to add my gallon to theirs.

4. Boko Haram: Everybody will run and leave the fuel for them.

.

what about the tip givers.

Hmm! So true...especially the Alaye's. When I first moved to Bariga, I went to buy fuel at a feeling station during scarcity and this guy just hailed me and collected my keg. He asked me howmuch fuel I wanted to buy and disappeared. I actually thought he was someone that knew me, till I was walking away after paying for the fuel and he pulled me back and shouted "OYAWERE NI! O ni fu mi ni nko ni." Translation= "Are you mad? You no go give me something." Anyway,if you have problem lasting long in bed, hit me up on BBM- 7C22F6EC.

Ok

Hmm. NIGERIA we hail thee

What of the ones that bribe the staffs

Op, what of celebrities? I heard they sometimes get preferential treatment when they step out to buy stuff. Or do you want to keep Davido and Wizkid on fuel queue? Lol...

iyatrustee:
The pregnant woman

na the baby wan drink the fuel?

J

femi4:
na the baby wan drink the fuel?

Those following you from Village are still with you! You can't see them, so go for deliverance sharp sharp!!! :-/

RickRichards:
4. Boko Haram: Everybody will run and leave the fuel for them.

RUDE BOY
Omo boy hope sey dem neva reach una side!

tchidi:

I de follow put gallon for boot o!! Those mean NNPC staff go just look you
'madam, put ya gallon for ya boot' . Like say dem buy me car.

I go just jeje find person with car and beg to add my gallon to theirs.

To theirs What if they didn't come with gallons?