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Judge This Case - Family (11) - Nairaland

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Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 10:36am On May 07, 2015
Mariojane:
actually i have nd nobody take it as a big deal cos the mummy asked immediately y I won't been eating and my bf explained to her.
y did'nt the mother ask instead of keeping it in her mind and acting later.

the mum should have ask her or her son

You are still bantering with that gullible dude? His type end up with horrible wives and retired runs girls. this thread has exposed the woes men cause upon themselves. Leave them o. Make we dey watch them. Them never see anything.

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by Mariojane(f): 10:43am On May 07, 2015
Sophyrocks:


You are still bantering with that gullible dude? His type end up with horrible wives and retired runs girls. this thread has exposed the woes men cause upon themselves. Leave them o. Make we dey watch them. Them never see anything.
smiley cheesy
Re: Judge This Case by justcallbuki(f): 11:46am On May 07, 2015
EricRichie:



You're totally spot on... For me I think the way the mother responded meant that no matter how the lady tries to reconcile her actions, she's already doomed..

Even if the guy insists and strong headly forges ahead to marry the lady without the approval of the mother, the lady would wish she was better off single than married.. .

Her life would be tormented and haunted by The mother in law showing her hell...

The best thing for the couple to do now is to go their separate ways...


EricRichie
sir are you for real?

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by BuddhaPalm(m): 11:52am On May 07, 2015
dharay88:
see quick conclusion.
Cus she refused to eat?

make IFA slap any mama wey follow me try dat. angry angry
Mehn dat was too quick for d mother in law.
Complete crap.

On this, me wunt listen to her tho...

You make SPLIT-SECOND 'conclusions' a gazillion times daily.

Your brain is inherently a lazy/smart brain. Heard of stereotypes and first impressions?

Although a man's mum is no position to decide his spouse. The girl acted without tact.
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 11:55am On May 07, 2015
justcallbuki:

sir are you for real?










EricRichie
Re: Judge This Case by innervoice(m): 12:17pm On May 07, 2015
Timbuktou:

Do the teachers in your own school grade whether an answer is right or wrong based on line of reasoning or fact?

In my school students were taught the difference between fact and opinion.
Re: Judge This Case by medexico(m): 12:26pm On May 07, 2015
I'm sorry but my parents can kiss my asssss
if I brought a girl home and they say I can't marry her

Imagine, they have eaten before coming,
why would she eat such heavy food again?

Mothers and their wahala self.

Imagine two years where will they both start from?
lemme tell you, african parents likes to be begged, just find time with that your babe and go and beg your mother very well.

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by medexico(m): 12:29pm On May 07, 2015
Go their separate ways after two years? shocked

Them dey buy wife or husband for market?

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by Temmytea70(m): 12:35pm On May 07, 2015
sammy455:
order d mother ?...who will order f mother, d son or d fiancee?

The fiancee nah
Re: Judge This Case by Temmytea70(m): 12:35pm On May 07, 2015
sammy455:
order d mother ?...who will order f mother, d son or d fiancee?

The fiancee nah buh make she ready chop poison sha o
Re: Judge This Case by mekaboy(m): 12:46pm On May 07, 2015
Damikevin:
so you and your food now are family right? She asked if she was hungry she said NO. To be honest I wouldn't come back to your house if after I tell u no you go ahead and try forcing me to eat. There will always be other time for food, if she refuses continuously then u should be worried. Parents and mother in laws are now like our lectures you must always do as they say even when its not what you want.

If u r the girl and ur forced to eat, then dont come back. Because as long as u dont eat that food, you r not coming back.
Re: Judge This Case by mekaboy(m): 12:52pm On May 07, 2015
Sophyrocks:


No. Horrible marriages have always been in existence from the days of the old. Its the same dysfunctional homes that produced dysfunctional individuals. Marriages of old only lasted because no one wanted to divorce and everyone was all about saving face. The fact that divorces were low doesnt mean they were all good and healthy marriages so dnt get it twisted. People now have a different orientation from the oldies about marriage. If truly we had better marriages of old then parents of then would have produced better wives and husbands for everyone. A lot of peeps are only recycling the mess from their homes into their own marriages.

All i know is that the mother in law is a horrible woman and if this guy allows this woman chase away good ladies by her being petty, that guy must be ready to marry an expired runs girl for a wife. A lot of you men will end up with such ladies if y'all continue to svck your mothers' b.reasts and have no minds of your own. No wonder the number of sissies amongst you have increased.

Expired runs girl or virgin, there is not difference. The most important thing is character. You dont know there r runs girls with good character?

I rather marry an expired runs girl with good character than a senseless virgin.
Re: Judge This Case by mekaboy(m): 12:56pm On May 07, 2015
Sophyrocks:
I trust my female folks with their PHD in pretence. They will pretend all their way through courtship with enugh eye service because that is what these men want actually. And when they get that ring in that finger, BAM!! They unleash their inner demons. Nigerian women, i hail o! grin Keep it up! I like una style jare. A woman has got to do what a woman has got to do. grin grin

whether she pretends or not, she should be sensible enough to know how to act. If she pretends and gets into the marriage and starts messing up, the man can always end it and go.
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 12:57pm On May 07, 2015
mekaboy:


Expired runs girl or virgin, there is not difference. The most important thing is character. You dont know there r runs girls with good character?

I rather marry an expired runs girl with good character than a senseless virgin.


Hehehehe. I knew that was what you wanted. What makes you think you are free from the cons of having such as a wife. I was right to say a lot of you dnt recognize a good wife when you see one. You better say amen to that prayer. Good character my foot! what a fantasy.

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by mekaboy(m): 1:01pm On May 07, 2015
medexico:
I'm sorry but my parents can kiss my asssss
if I brought a girl home and they say I can't marry her

Imagine, they have eaten before coming,
why would she eat such heavy food again?

Mothers and their wahala self.

Imagine two years where will they both start from?
lemme tell you, african parents likes to be begged, just find time with that your babe and go and beg your mother very well.

U never had respect for parents in the first place so it shouldnt be a problem for u.
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 1:04pm On May 07, 2015
mekaboy:


whether she pretends or not, she should be sensible enough to know how to act. If she pretends and gets into the marriage and starts messing up, the man can always end it and go.

Hahahaha. you see why too much of hypocrisy svcks? So you are an advocate of divorce but you were complaining of too much divorces in modern marriages. you have joined the bandwagon so why complain? You think you will keep divorcing any woman you meet like opening a door and closing it? Like i said, a lot of you men dnt know a good wife when you see one and are too Naive which is why you depend on your mothers to do the selection based on petty issues. Please dnt come back to nairaland and lament for us on how your ever-pleasing wife changed and started having issues with your mother. A lot of you will see that manifesting soon.

3 Likes

Re: Judge This Case by medexico(m): 1:53pm On May 07, 2015
mekaboy:


U never had respect for parents in the first place so it shouldnt be a problem for u.

If na you make you no marry her because of respect

Na you and your parent go dey live for the same house when you marry?

Abi finding someone tomlove is as easy?

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by medexico(m): 1:54pm On May 07, 2015
Sophyrocks:


Hahahaha. you see why too much of hypocrisy svcks? So you are an advocate of divorce but you were complaining of too much divorces in modern marriages. you have joined the bandwagon so why complain? You think you will keep divorcing any woman you meet like opening a door and closing it? Like i said, a lot of you men dnt know a good wife when you see one and are too Naive which is why you depend on your mothers to do the selection based on petty issues. Please dnt come back to nairaland and lament for us on how your ever-pleasing wife changed and started having issues with your mother. A lot of you will see that manifesting soon.

Tell him o

1 Like

Re: Judge This Case by keenn: 4:01pm On May 07, 2015
I hate the presence of oil in fried eggs expecially when eating them with bread, in fact, I can though-up. On this very day, I invited a lady (just started dating) home to make me bread and egg, she innocently poured an appreciable amount of this oil into the eggs. Alass!!! My worst night mare.
Guess what? I stressed my oesophagus to swallow every spoonful of egg, I had to seize my breadth and constrict my tommy for every attempt to through-up, my God!!! The experience was awful. I gave her a kiss and thanked her for the time in the kitchen.
she later by accident got to know I never liked oiled eggs, she was so surprise why I didn't complain about that very day.....and no lady has every loved me more(where ever u her peace be upon u)
Uzziah in the Christian Bible was struck dead for an attempt( a reflex act are most times unconscious act) to try to prevent the ark of God from falling. In as much we might try to excuse the lady for being naïve, some actions are too expensive to be reconsidered. It so unfortunate that sometimes what we take little are often the prime.
Re: Judge This Case by Damikevin(m): 4:11pm On May 07, 2015
mekaboy:


If u r the girl and ur forced to eat, then dont come back. Because as long as u dont eat that food, you r not coming back.
why don't we switch things a bit. What if it was u who refuse to eat in her parents house(pls don't say u have never refused eating, cos you will be taging ur self a new name as far as am concerned) then the one of the parents say u are not marrying there daughter becos u didn't eat there food. Will they be fair to you.
Re: Judge This Case by Mosenge: 8:32pm On May 07, 2015
I feel everyone should have reservation, not to go extreme. I think we should look inward, come back home, and learn who we really are. The mother of the man intending to get married is 100% right as a normal, sound African mother, in her observation and reasoning. The problem is with the man and his fiancé' who are out of order. (1) maybe the girl is not the lively type that can walk into any home and blend, like doing the ditches, which she never did, well not a problem. I agree some will end up for a eye service. If he had confronted his fiancé on getting home about the mother's grievance, what i expect from the girl is for her to run back to her mother-in-law or make a call to her if for distance, and apologize immediately and promise to see her. It was not mentioned, you see. Let’s come home and talk like we have culture, which is the foundation. Maybe, it is mothers like this who are still alive that are still standing to protect our values or else maybe without them, what distinguishes us from other race may have gone into instinct, God forbid. Our nation cannot be lost and be a laughing stock in the face of the earth. I refuse and annul any yoke binding us to be a confused generation. What shows that we are civilized? Is it by killing our values and living in a borrowed culture? Why must we deceive ourselves, and be the ones to copy, why not the west do the copying, dress, and talk like us. Is it not enough what we got from them? Foreign language, education, weird life etc. you name them, and maybe an half-baked system of government? It is a pity, i know we all commenting here are all victims in a failed system of a society that has lost her value as a people. What distinguishes people on the face of the earth is culture. Culture is the characteristics of a particular group of people defined by their beliefs, way of life, dress code, greeting pattern, language, way of thinking, arts, social habits etc. etc. Nigerians are wonderfully endowed, such that apart from our natural resources, our talents or blessing enables us to fit in or adapt to every society in the world and stand out, but the where we messed everything up was when we, rather than being humble and attribute glory to God, pride sets in, such that we gradually begin to loose direction and consciousness of who we are as a people, that are called to lead, first ourselves, then our neighbors(Africa), and so on till we get to where God wants us to be. We say charity begins at home. Let reason well, and let the good mother to be. Tomorrow we shall all yell, ''Happy Mother's Day"
Re: Judge This Case by osile2012: 12:40am On May 08, 2015
Mosenge:
I feel everyone should have reservation, not to go extreme. I think we should look inward, come back home, and learn who we really are. The mother of the man intending to get married is 100% right as a normal, sound African mother, in her observation and reasoning. The problem is with the man and his fiancé' who are out of order. (1) maybe the girl is not the lively type that can walk into any home and blend, like doing the ditches, which she never did, well not a problem. I agree some will end up for a eye service. If he had confronted his fiancé on getting home about the mother's grievance, what i expect from the girl is for her to run back to her mother-in-law or make a call to her if for distance, and apologize immediately and promise to see her. It was not mentioned, you see. Let’s come home and talk like we have culture, which is the foundation. Maybe, it is mothers like this who are still alive that are still standing to protect our values or else maybe without them, what distinguishes us from other race may have gone into instinct, God forbid. Our nation cannot be lost and be a laughing stock in the face of the earth. I refuse and annul any yoke binding us to be a confused generation. What shows that we are civilized? Is it by killing our values and living in a borrowed culture? Why must we deceive ourselves, and be the ones to copy, why not the west do the copying, dress, and talk like us. Is it not enough what we got from them? Foreign language, education, weird life etc. you name them, and maybe an half-baked system of government? It is a pity, i know we all commenting here are all victims in a failed system of a society that has lost her value as a people. What distinguishes people on the face of the earth is culture. Culture is the characteristics of a particular group of people defined by their beliefs, way of life, dress code, greeting pattern, language, way of thinking, arts, social habits etc. etc. Nigerians are wonderfully endowed, such that apart from our natural resources, our talents or blessing enables us to fit in or adapt to every society in the world and stand out, but the where we messed everything up was when we, rather than being humble and attribute glory to God, pride sets in, such that we gradually begin to loose direction and consciousness of who we are as a people, that are called to lead, first ourselves, then our neighbors(Africa), and so on till we get to where God wants us to be. We say charity begins at home. Let reason well, and let the good mother to be. Tomorrow we shall all yell, ''Happy Mother's Day"

Nice one
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 8:22am On May 08, 2015
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Re: Judge This Case by Fr33zy(m): 10:43am On May 08, 2015
Whatever my Mother's want that's what am settling with cause she had experience when it comes to marriage.

As for the lady, she would have make use of lifeline like: Phone a friend, Ask the audience (BBM's friend or Group) & 50-50 (her fiancee advise)

I had similar experience on showing my mum my first ever girl friend, all she said was "both of you can't marry eachother and most shocking is that, she said it to her face!" and that's the end of the relationship.

A month later I met my wife though had some little challenge but convinced my mum throughout then she accepted and blessed our union even at the later end of her sickness my wife was a care-giver till death. During those periods all she did was praying for her.

So my mother comes first in anything cause of pain and agony she faced in making me a man...
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 12:45pm On May 08, 2015
Blackett:
I'll love them to get along. She'll even apologize and eat all the food in my mothers house.

But when push comes to shove, and my mother actually asks me to "choose between her and my fiancee", I'm choosing my fiancee.

Ok. I can respect that. Glad you will choose her. That is the correct move. It is the quintessential picture perfect of "to leave and cleave".....it will serve you well in your marriage ( and your happiness) if you choose her sides always-- even whether she is in the wrong or not. Lol.

Good luck tho. grin



But the key word is "if and when push comes to shove". Every attempt should be made to make peace first.
Re: Judge This Case by braine(m): 6:10pm On May 08, 2015
afilaka:



Abegi,so she shuld force herself 2 eat just 2 create gud impression,d first time my boyfriend came 2 ma house,ma mum prepared amala,ma bf's worst food,wen dey wanted 2 serve him,he immediately turned it down,ma mum herself went 2d kitchen n prepared poundo yam 4 him.she didn't take it personal because she didn't see anytin wrong in u sayin u don't want sumtyn.eeven we ar children ar nt forced 2 eat a food we don't like.
thats a different case. Apart from your bf being the man in the scenario, he actually doesn't eat it. Thats quite different.
Re: Judge This Case by mekaboy(m): 10:15am On May 09, 2015
Damikevin:
why don't we switch things a bit. What if it was u who refuse to eat in her parents house(pls don't say u have never refused eating, cos you will be taging ur self a new name as far as am concerned) then the one of the parents say u are not marrying there daughter becos u didn't eat there food. Will they be fair to you.

Why will i not eat in her parents house if i want to marry her? Even if i dont, am i the one marrying her or is she marrying me?
Re: Judge This Case by bukatyne(f): 10:24am On May 09, 2015
osile2012:
A young man has been dating this lady for about 2 years,They both have jobs, and get along well. The guy decides to take the relationship to the next level(Marriage). He calls his mother and tells her he will come to show her his wife to be. They traveled about 3 hrs to get there.

They got to the mans family house, she greeted the mans mother very well and everyone was happy. As the conversation went on, the mother inlaw went to the kitchen, came out and asked the girl where will she eat? in the parlour of dinning table? The young girl innocently said, "No ma, dont bother i am not hungry" . She said ok and brought pounded yam and soup for the man and he ate .

Conversation went on normally and they slept and traveled the next day.When he got back to base, called the mother and told her he had arrived. The mother said thank GOD, but what she wants to tell him is that, it is over her dead body that he will marry that girl that refused her food. He said all attempts to explain that they ate before getting there fell on deaf ears.

She said he has to choose between her and that girl.

I discussed this with some mothers, and they all said they would have done the same. No who is right and who is wrong ? Whose side are you on? the Lady or the mans mother.?

If you were the guy, what would you do? Marry her without your mothers blessing or find someone else ?

The mother is a terrible woman and would make a terrible MIL. Why couldn't she persuade the girl or tell her 'you do not reject meals in your in-law home bla bla' or show her disapproval?

The lady might be better off without her son.
Re: Judge This Case by Emaprince: 10:47am On May 09, 2015
That lady will be the type that sees her inlaws as strangers. No wonder she instantly rejected the food of the woman she's meeting for the first time.
He discussed with other mothers and they all supported his mom. There's no need seeking the opinions of these spinsters because they are all same and mannerless, and do not know how it feels to suffer and train a man only to feel disrespected, rejected or belittled by the woman that came into his life.

What an ill-brought up girl.
Re: Judge This Case by Nobody: 4:30pm On May 09, 2015
EricRichie:
This is the most reasonable post I have read today...

The guy's mother is right..

1) the lady should have joined his mother in the kitchen and should have aided her in the preparing of the food..

2) the lady failed the so called "mother in-laws" test.. Refusing to eat the food from your potential mother inlaw is considered highly disrespectful and condemnable..

The girl is a wolf in sheep's clothing, and the mother has clearly seen that she isn't the right person for her son..




EricRichie..

You just judged a whole girl's life based on her refusing to eat? And why must she join her mother-in-law in the kitchen? I swear I cannot marry your type. The first day my brother brought his wife home, she did not join my mother in the kitchen. That doesn't mean she did not make a good wife. People are different. I have a friend whose mother would see that as famzing. So you want her to enter kitchen on first day to paint the picture that what? She will be a good slave to both husband and in laws? Will you enter my mum's kitchen if I brought you home and she was cooking? Double standards. Don't even give me the culture bullshit. If this is the reason for their break up, then there's something wrong with the culture.
Re: Judge This Case by Damikevin(m): 8:55pm On May 09, 2015
mekaboy:


Why will i not eat in her parents house if i want to marry her? Even if i dont, am i the one marrying her or is she marrying me?
am too tired to be "thumb thuggin'" with you today. So she must do all what ur family wants. I know pple like you.

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