Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,154,085 members, 7,821,747 topics. Date: Wednesday, 08 May 2024 at 05:46 PM

Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application - Celebrities - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Celebrities / Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application (781 Views)

Fan Asks Wizkid About Caro On Twitter. See His Reply / Fans Slam Simi Over Her Outfit: "Stop Deceiving Her, The Outfit Is Ridiculous" / Is Dbanj New Look Ridiculous Or Okay (2) (3) (4)

(1) (Reply) (Go Down)

Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by GODSS: 10:04pm On May 22, 2015
Terrorist organization al-Qaeda isn’t willing to hire any old schlub just because they say they’re willing to kill for Allah — no, it turns out they have standards. Vox has posted the official al-Qaeda job application that was recently declassified by the U.S. government and it’s loaded with utterly ridiculous questions that make it sound like it was written by The Onion. Here are the most absurd things al-Qaeda asks its prospective hires.


“What objectives would you like to accomplish on your jihad path?”

It seems that al-Qaeda is really looking for go-getter terrorists, not just lazy slobs who will fail to light their shoes on fire and then demand their 70 virgins. This makes us wonder if al-Qaeda also hands new recruits copies of 7 Habits of Highly Effective Martyrs as well.

“Are any of your relatives and friends in the jihad theater?”

Apparently it’s important to avoid the appearance of nepotism when hiring new terrorists. Remember the idiots who tried setting a car on fire and ramming it into a Glasgow airport terminal? Yeah, we bet they only got their jobs because their uncle was a former bin Laden deputy. That kind of stuff is embarrassing to terrorist organizations, so we’re not surprised they’ve started asking about it.

“What ideas do you, your family, and your other acquaintances have about jiahd for Allah’s sake?”
Be sure you’ve fully patented your jihad idea before telling al-Qaeda about it — those guys are notorious for stealing other terrorists’ IP.

“Who should we contact in case you become a

READ MORE http://www.newsgoogle.net/2015/05/ridiculous-questions-al-qaeda-asks-on.html

Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by podosci(m): 10:09pm On May 22, 2015
How can you claim this are ridiculous questions for people willing to kill in the name of a Diety..
The world has gone bunkers
Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by GODSS: 10:18pm On May 22, 2015
podosci:
How can you claim this are ridiculous questions for people willing to kill in the name of a Diety..
The world has gone bunkers
hm
Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by cesarblu: 11:34pm On May 23, 2015
podosci:
How can you claim this are ridiculous questions for people willing to kill in the name of a Diety..
The world has gone bunkers
forget na procedures
Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by ifyan(m): 1:00am On May 24, 2015
From what l red somewhere Osama is a good economist. Si l may be not surprised on this nonsense.

You know. ....
Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by ifyan(m): 1:01am On May 24, 2015
podosci:
How can you claim this are ridiculous questions for people willing to kill in the name of a Diety..
The world has gone bunkers

Don't be surprised if they are the one that is behind this.

1 Like

Re: Ridiculous Questions Al-qaeda Asks On Its Official Job Application by nolie: 9:13am On May 24, 2015
ifyan:


Don't be surprised if they are the one that is behind this.

(1) (Reply)

Hilarious Photo: The Last "Selfie" / Justin Timberlake Posts SUPER CUTE Photo Of His Son To Mark Father's Day (pic) / Singer Sevyn Streeter Steps Out In Black See-through Dress

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 14
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.