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Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? - Family - Nairaland

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Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Woged2005(f): 10:14am On Jun 15, 2015
Good AM NLers. This question is not for me (Some of u know I am already taken). But I have always gotten very useful tips that helped me in life from NLers on various issues. Yesterday a friend was narrating to me fears about long distance relationships & the possibility that the other person could be hiding a lot of his/her real personality and projecting 'saintly personality' only for u to find out when you are already emotionally deep in the 'water'. I didn't know when I said to her "..but there must be some clues that reveal a true personality no matter how people try to conceal it..". She wanted me to explain further..but then i realized I was neither experienced in personality-reading no a psychologist. Therefore, I am throwing the question to NLers for help:

In this era of meeting people via Facebook and social media for long distance relationship, what clues in someone's behaviors/ attitude can reveal his/her true good and bad traits/ personality?

For example what clues can reveal if:

1- either he/she has problems moving along with other people or is a truly friendly personality?
2- either he/she has serious attitude problems, hence the reason for being single till date?
3- either he/she has a lot of emotional baggage and frustrations in life that may become time-bomb later?
4- either he/she has hot-temper/ anger issues
5- either he/she is lying about his/her education/job/ career?
6- either he/she is telling the truth about his/her past relationships and why they ended?
7- either he/she is a serial womanizer (for men) or a Gold-digger (for ladies)?
8- either he/she can make a good and stable family, or will easily quit and file divorce when things don't go his/her way?
9- either he/she is more interested in traveling abroad than a real relationship

etc, etc, etc, etc

Please give us as many clues as you can from your training or experience even if it's not listed above. List clues for good and positive qualities too, not only negative ones too.

God bless you for sharing your experiences!
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Cutehector(m): 10:23am On Jun 15, 2015
If u wana knw if they hav a bad temper, create an e drama... Like engage in a silent treatment or smth... Do smthh to make dem upset.. I do dat a lot, and funny enough, they turn out bein lionesses. grin

Secondly, ask dem about their fears in life, what dey dread most.

As for their career, if he says he works in an oil company let's say chevron., u may knw if he isn't telln d truth if he is always free..

3 Likes

Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by bigheart2013(m): 10:58am On Jun 15, 2015
Negatives----------

If he/she has really come of age (Above 30 for ladies, Above 35 for men) but single, no steady career (if any all), no friends, yet with a university degree - abeg thread softly!! An adage says a "good market sells fast". There is a reason for the lull usually attitude problems. One can't possibly be lagging in every aspect of life (career, relationships, finances, social network, etc, something must be going great in one's life even if one area failed)...hmmmmmm!

- if he or she uses bible quotation or religion to justify every mistake he makes (not taking responsibility for anything), sure sign of laziness and someone who points fingers. be ready to take care of him/her 80% - 90% grin

- if he or she won't show excitement and say "thank you" genuinely at little gestures or gifts u give except you remind him or her---sign of an ungrateful person.

- if he or she is one week one trouble, one month one drama, one year one issue, abeg run 4X40! grin....you can't change her. You will argue and fight till infinity if you marry him/ her

Positive.......

- Even if he/she doesn't have a good job or career however, he or she actively engages in sound intellectual discussions and comes up with good ideas, he or she may just need a little 'push' in career. he will do well in a conducive environment.

- If she cries easily when other people are hurt or when she hears stories of other people she doesn't even know getting maltreated --that's a kind heart right there.... a possible 'people's princess'

2 Likes

Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Woged2005(f): 11:08am On Jun 15, 2015
I was told if he still uses a blackberry or one of those old phones and refuses to upgrade, it may not be a bad sign after all - sign of loyalty, someone who sticks to something he loves no matter the frenzy around him grin grin grin grin grin

If he's always online but not chatting with you...hehehehehe!!..there may be many of you (online lovers) tongue tongue
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by KanwuliaJara: 8:43pm On Jun 15, 2015
Another "friend" wahala thread? shocked
The amount of time NLanders spend with other people's issues makes me wonder what time they have left in the world to attend to theirs! grin



>>>>>>>exits sharp sharply >>>>>>
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by SAMBARRY: 12:15am On Jun 16, 2015
grin


you sef notice am grin
KanwuliaJara:
Another "friend" wahala thread? shocked
The amount of time NLanders spend with other people's issues makes me wonder what time they have left in the world to attend to theirs! grin



>>>>>>>exits sharp sharply >>>>>>



Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by KanwuliaJara: 1:35am On Jun 16, 2015
SAMBARRY:
grin


you sef notice am grin

Gone are the days of BETA threads I swia!
Why pipo go carry "friend" wahala take do pillow ati coverlet to sleep under bridge for h-unsai 'OT sun beats me!

See suffer-'EAD o! cry

I NEVER! grin

1 Like

Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Truckpusher(m): 1:53am On Jun 16, 2015
KanwuliaJara:
Another "friend" wahala thread? shocked
The amount of time NLanders spend with other people's issues makes me wonder what time they have left in the world to attend to theirs! grin



>>>>>>>exits sharp sharply >>>>>>



Come back here jare and give ya own advice.
You wan run leave people wey carry their friends problem for head? cheesy
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by KanwuliaJara: 1:58am On Jun 16, 2015
Truckpusher:
Come back here jare and give ya own advice.
You wan run leave people wey carry their friends problem for head? cheesy

The "friend" done solve her mata tey-tey ke!
Na to tia pahint remain for hia o! grin
As you kukuma sabi, I nor dey wia pahint. . . . So notin to tia!

Shiioooor! cool
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Truckpusher(m): 2:21am On Jun 16, 2015
KanwuliaJara:


The "friend" done solve her mata tey-tey ke!
Na to tia pahint remain for hia o! grin
As you kukuma sabi, I nor dey wia pahint. . . . So notin to tia!

Shiioooor! cool
Lmao cheesy

I beg to disagree on the highlighted abeg. cheesy
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by KanwuliaJara: 2:54am On Jun 16, 2015
Truckpusher:
Lmao cheesy

I beg to disagree on the highlighted abeg. cheesy

grin cheesy grin cheesy grin cheesy
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Truckpusher(m): 2:55am On Jun 16, 2015
KanwuliaJara:


grin cheesy grin cheesy grin cheesy
Fear catch me na. cheesy
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by KanwuliaJara: 2:58am On Jun 16, 2015
Truckpusher:
Fear catch me na. cheesy

Have no fear please! wink
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Nobody: 3:31am On Jun 16, 2015
lol @ silent treatment. that's mean. if u know someone likes u online, why would u do that?


Cutehector:
If u wana knw if they hav a bad temper, create an e drama... Like engage in a silent treatment or smth... Do smthh to make dem upset.. I do dat a lot, and funny enough, they turn out bein lionesses. grin

Secondly, ask dem about their fears in life, what dey dread most.

As for their career, if he says he works in an oil company let's say chevron., u may knw if he isn't telln d truth if he is always free..
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Cutehector(m): 3:36am On Jun 16, 2015
aflyingbird:
lol @ silent treatment. that's mean. if u know someone likes u online, why would u do that?


lol its just to knw her tru character dats all and decide if u can live wit it. Its not a crime isn't it? Afterall u girls fake a pregnancy news just to see if ur boyfrnd's reaction if he was very responsible and lovd u dat much
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Nobody: 5:41am On Jun 16, 2015
There are very few people that are sincere to your face talk more of from a distance...
People pretend and they pretend excellently..
My advice is that, don't ignore lies,
pay attention to your sixth sense/instincts/that small voice...
When things are not adding up, don't believe that its all in your head...
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by SAMBARRY: 6:33am On Jun 16, 2015
grin
KanwuliaJara:


Gone are the days of BETA threads I swia!
Why pipo go carry "friend" wahala take do pillow ati coverlet to sleep under bridge for h-unsai 'OT sun beats me!

I NEVER! grin
Re: Help! In A Long Distance Relationship What Hidden Clues Reveal True Personality? by Nobody: 12:35pm On Jun 28, 2015
bigheart2013:
Negatives----------

If he/she has really come of age (Above 30 for ladies, Above 35 for men) but single, no steady career (if any all), no friends, yet with a university degree - abeg thread softly!! An adage says a "good market sells fast". There is a reason for the lull usually attitude problems. One can't possibly be lagging in every aspect of life (career, relationships, finances, social network, etc, something must be going great in one's life even if one area failed)...hmmmmmm!

- if he or she uses bible quotation or religion to justify every mistake he makes (not taking responsibility for anything), sure sign of laziness and someone who points fingers. be ready to take care of him/her 80% - 90% grin

- if he or she won't show excitement and say "thank you" genuinely at little gestures or gifts u give except you remind him or her---sign of an ungrateful person.

- if he or she is one week one trouble, one month one drama, one year one issue, abeg run 4X40! grin....you can't change her. You will argue and fight till infinity if you marry him/ her

Positive.......

- Even if he/she doesn't have a good job or career however, he or she actively engages in sound intellectual discussions and comes up with good ideas, he or she may just need a little 'push' in career. he will do well in a conducive environment.

- If she cries easily when other people are hurt or when she hears stories of other people she doesn't even know getting maltreated --that's a kind heart right there.... a possible 'people's princess'


Believe it or not I am does two last statement below...Bt I sabi vex ooo am emotional and temperamental...so.... grin

Anyways I am in dat boat @ the moment.....u hav to be very sensitive to the communication, everything is ur level of "communication" u re 80% of wat u say....so if u cn monitor his actions, decision, choice of words, u cn monitor @ less few percent of his /her life

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