you didnt see big big boys to open your thighs for.na person wey no get im bearing you con open am for.you sef no get direction for your life.i hope you know if you start a family with a guy who can barely feed himself,love will pay the bills,sex will put food on the table,love too will buy diapers

Okay, this is what I have to say stellytwinkle:

1. Do not abort the baby. I do not know what your mum and elder sister may do to you if you dont, but I know that's the ONLY right thing to do.

2. Stop having premarital sex. One reason God says 'no' to it is to protect us from the mess that could come with it.

3. Sit down and think about what you want to do with your life. School? Business? What? Do not live day to day without plans, else you would wake up one day and realise you are a 50-year old woman who cannot account for most of her life. You may not need to take a huge leap right now; the pregnancy and all you're starting to face with it may be enough for now. Nevertheless, start holding lectures and throwing questions by yourself, with yourself, and to yourself, all aimed at charting a course for your life.

4. Is your boyfriend a responsible guy who has a plan?

5. Lastly, you may want to watch 'Tango With Me'. It's a Nollywood movie. It's not real life, but I think it will help you. It's about a very strong woman who fought against all odds to keep her baby, and things ended up being okay at the end.

Take care.

LadyFiona:
Keep the baby and get a job.

Your Mom and sister including the " guy " missed another vital option --- marriage.

At 20 and 31 years, both of you should get married and slug it out together.




You started frolicking at 14 years, you're one baddass ooooooo.

You must've missed the part where she said the guy is broke and can't even afford to take care of himself.. let alone two mouths. How are they suppose to finance the marriage rites or get an apartment? Let alone build a life together??

I can't advice you because I am unworthy to. I can't possibly judge you, you already acknowledge your fault, ask God for forgiveness and believe that u have been forgiven.
I can, however, tell u of a fine thing I saw when I was working as a volunteer in an orphanage.

A young girl, can't be more than 18, started working at the orphanage so that her baby can in turn use up their resources. She would not abort and she wouldn't abandon her child. Today, her baby is grown - abt a year plus. I stopped working there but the last time I saw her She was looking very healthy. She still works at d orphanage but goes home at night and resumes he next day to see her baby (as opposed to living there when the baby was just some days old).
She could even improve herself and get an education if she wanted to.

God bless u

IF this is true. There is nothing virtuous about it.

1. He dated you in secondary school at 14years at his own age of 25years!!!
2. What do you mean you had sex at 18years? Or you think because he didn't penetrate with his p#nis means it was not sex. Cos if nothing sexual happened in those 4years then why do you still call it a relationship.
3. Why do you feel you feel you have disappointed your parents. If the relationship was legit for 6years would they not expect marriage.
4. Your baby daddy is 31years so what did he expect would happen. Was he looking towards you clocking 15years dating before belle go enter.

I seriously suspect your relationship
Cos if I heard a 26year old started to date a 14year old then he started as a paedophile. .

salsera:
IF this is true. There is nothing virtuous about it.

1. He dated you in secondary school at 14years at his own age of 25years!!!
2. What do you mean you had sex at 18years? Or you think because he didn't penetrate with his p#nis means it was not sex. Cos if nothing sexual happened in those 4years then why do you still call it a relationship.
3. Why do you feel you feel you have disappointed your parents. If the relationship was legit for 6years would they not expect marriage.
4. Your baby daddy is 31years so what did he expect would happen. Was he looking towards you clocking 15years dating before belle go enter.

I seriously suspect your relationship
Cos if I heard a 26year old started to date a 14year old then he started as a paedophile. .

Quite Honestly, none of this sounds new. I'm shocked that you are shocked about this in a very perverse 21st century!
1. I was 12 yeas when I started having advances from my Uncle's twenty-something year old friends. I had a very big stature and what's usually on the mind of most boys is sex and/or romance that they are unprepared for.
2. I don't believe there must be sex to qualify as a relationship.

salsera:
IF this is true. There is nothing virtuous about it.

1. He dated you in secondary school at 14years at his own age of 25years!!!
2. What do you mean you had sex at 18years? Or you think because he didn't penetrate with his p#nis means it was not sex. Cos if nothing sexual happened in those 4years then why do you still call it a relationship.
3. Why do you feel you feel you have disappointed your parents. If the relationship was legit for 6years would they not expect marriage.
4. Your baby daddy is 31years so what did he expect would happen. Was he looking towards you clocking 15years dating before belle go enter.

I seriously suspect your relationship
Cos if I heard a 26year old started to date a 14year old then he started as a paedophile. .

Quite Honestly, none of this sounds new. I'm shocked that you are shocked about this in a very perverse 21st century!
1. I was 12 yeas when I started having advances from my Uncle's twenty-something year old friends. I had a very big stature and what's usually on the mind of most boys is sex and/or romance that they are unprepared for.
2. I don't believe there must be sex to qualify as a relationship.
3. It happens, it is possible they were sneaking around as no parent in Nigeria ever expects their 14year old to be in a relationship.
4...
Finally, I don't know of any laws against pedophiles here in Nigeria. A senator married a 13year old for crying out loud. I have seen a 16year old and 21 year old be in a relationship. It is wrong but it happens. My point is the girl know her wrong, she Is seeking help. And all I see is a further highlight of what she already knows.

stellarby:


Quite Honestly, none of this sounds new. I'm shocked that you are shocked about this in a very perverse 21st century!
1. I was 12 yeas when I started having advances from my Uncle's twenty-something year old friends. I had a very big stature and what's usually on the mind of most boys is sex and/or romance that they are unprepared for.
2. I don't believe there must be sex to qualify as a relationship.
3. It happens, it is possible they were sneaking around as no parent in Nigeria ever expects their 14year old to be in a relationship.
4...
Finally, I don't know of any laws against pedophiles here in Nigeria. A senator married a 13year old for crying out loud. I have seen a 16year old and 21 year old be in a relationship. It is wrong but it happens. My point is the girl know her wrong, she Is seeking help. And all I see is a further highlight of what she already knows.

You just buttressed my point. When you were that young ur uncles mates were interested in you Sexually. That's all they would want from a teen of that age so her claiming he was made her virtuous because he made her grow grow into a lady is bollocks. He used her plain and simple. And he's using her now. What's rights does she have in this relationship. She barely grew on her own to make her aware of what she wants out of life.

That's is why she is here nah asking they want to kill my baby. Is she an adult? So called old boyfriend is jobless and probabaly has been for years. What options does she have no education probably has not worked a day in her life.

She better beg her parents to help raise the child so she can go to university. Then end this relationship else she be back here AGAIN AND AGAIN wondering why her lover doesn't want to marry her or care for her or why he's having affairs.

Let her BE SINGLE FOR ONCE IN HER LIFE.

I'm not shocked..I'm pointing out her naivety

stellarby:


You must've missed the part where she said the guy is broke and can't even afford to take care of himself.. let alone two mouths. How are they suppose to finance the marriage rites or get an apartment? Let alone build a life together??

Totally!!!!! My bad.

Can't they afford court rites. I am just fishing , don't want anything to happen to that precious.

You have to keep that baby.
At 14yrs,you already had a boyfriend?How careless of your parents!

The deed is done.I can't lie to you,you're going to have it rough for now.Unfortunately,your boyfriend at 31yrs does not have a focus himself.Start to think of what you are going to do.You might have to take up petty jobs like a cleaner so you have some income no matter how meagre the salary is.
I hope you can get some support from your family.

@edywife.

Pls dont be offended ohhh. I want to know how this young lady can be helped. Can money be raised for her to start a business? Even though she made a mistake, I think she actually needs help.

I would really like to contribute financially towards helping her.

amtheone:
@edywife.

Pls dont be offended ohhh. I want to know how this young lady can be helped. Can money be raised for her to start a business? Even though she made a mistake, I think she actually needs help.

I would really like to contribute financially towards helping her.

Not offended dear,i was thinking in that direction too.

I don't know if it's a good idea,that's why i asked her what she had in mind.

thorpido:
You have to keep that baby.
At 14yrs,you already had a boyfriend?How careless of your parents!

The deed is done.I can't lie to you,you're going to have it rough for now.Unfortunately,your boyfriend at 31yrs does not have a focus himself.Start to think of what you are going to do.You might have to take up petty jobs like a cleaner so you have some income no matter how meagre the salary is.
I hope you can get some support from your family.

Pls don't blame her parents. She made that choice. I wasn't that silly when I was 12 talk more of 14 years.

edwife:


Not offended dear,i was thinking in that direction too.

I don't know if it's a good idea,that's why i asked her what she had in mind.

Ok, lets wait for her. I feel terribly bad when I see these young ladies giving birth without husbands and in some cases no adequate support from the family. They go through so much uneccessary hardship.

@Op, God is your strength, kindly let us know what u can do within this short time. Be strong and very courageous, for God in His mercy will definately make provision for u.

ireneidiva:

Pls don't blame her parents. She made that choice. I wasn't that silly when I was 12 talk more of 14 years.

...and you don't think it's because your parents taught you?It's her choice at the end of the day but parents are becoming careless nowadays.I don't know if it's because of being too preoccupied trying to make ends meet.

thorpido:
...and you don't think it's because your parents taught you?It's her choice at the end of the day but parents are becoming careless nowadays.I don't know if it's because of being too preoccupied trying to make ends meet.

Nah it wasn't because anyone taught me. Things have been rough for me but I made a choice. So its not always the parents fault. Though some parents are actually careless truly. Like in school, they won't send their kid money for months. Who do they think is caring for the kids there?

There's no need for regrets or blame game, the deed has been done,
Abortion might be the easiest way out... But not the best..

Keep the baby...
Life will be tough, I mean very tough..
Those that will promise to stand by you might desert you..

But sooner than later you will be fine, thank your stars that the man choose to stand by you...
You will surely be fine...

[quote author=stellytwinkle post=35206543]

Is he a graduate Or is he working

People re saying let him give her money do u know if he Is capable enough,if he works or something.

Babe's sobbing ain't gonna change the fact that ur preggy,truth be told u bleeped up big time but at the same time it can happen to anyone,i wouldn't reali advice u to embrace marriage so quickly coz ur man friend who u think u know so well can change at anytime and might see it as perhaps plans to hook him down and most of all u won't enjoy it if he isn't financially stable coz every little thing will irritate him and he would get paranoid which can result in abuse and it would be too late for u coz ur legally married already.

I am totally against abortion,u neva can tell f dat is d child dat will make u proud.i would like to take u guys tru sum memory lane
1.a teenage girl gets pregnant weeks to her weddn nt even knowing who was responsible aldoe she was a virgin bt who would belive,f Mary d mother of Jesus had felt so bad abt her pregnancy n aborted him DO U THINK Jesus WOULD AV BEEN BORN?
2.There is a preacher and wife who are very, very poor. They already have 14 kids. Now she finds out she is pregnant with her 15th. They are living in tremendous poverty. Considering their poverty and the excessive world population, would you consider recommending abortion? Dat is today's john Wesley who is d founder of methodist.
3.The father is sick with sniffles, the mother has TB. They have 4 children. The first is blind, the second is dead. The third is deaf and the fourth has TB. The mother finds she is pregnant again. Given the extreme situation, would you recommend abortion?u could have killed beethoven
4.A man raped a 13 year old black girl and she got pregnant. If you were her parents, would you consider recommending abortion?
you would have killed Ethel Waters, the great black gospel singer.
5.pope john Paul d 2nd was almost killed(abortion)
6.justin bieber.
7.celine dion.
8.nick cannon
9. I personally could have been aborted coz my grandparents were never in support of my parents union(my mom's parents are rich and dad's side re poor),they felt getting each other pregnant would make their parents change their mind but it never did instead my mums parents and sisters insisted on an abortion,they gave her drugs,poisoned her drinks all unknown to her but it never worked. My parents had to both run away and after years they finally agreed coz they saw how great my dad had become. etc.d long list goes on and on
If these people dint kill their babies despite the terrible situations they were facing why should u
When there is life there is hope,no condition is permanent,the badmouthing will definitely stop after months or highest a year and that's all,you have ur life back.be strong.
I hope this keeps u going for a while,if u ever need someone to talk to direct message me.

Freciprocal:


This might be one of the toughest decisions you may take in your life...

Do not be scared.... You are not alone.

Your decision has already been made by you, what u need most is Encouragement.

Many Ladies like you have been thru this and come out victorious. I just pray you Love your guy very much, and don't see him as a hindrance to you attaining your goals.

The deed has been done my dear... don't look back. People would call u names, don't mind dem. You would give birth safely and still gain admission next year!

I will put you in my prayers and I urge you to be strong. God Bless you my dear!

perry2020:
[/quote][quote author=Freciprocal post=35207004]

This might be one of the toughest decisions you may take in your life...

Do not be scared.... You are not alone.

Your decision has already been made by you, what u need most is Encouragement.

Many Ladies like you have been thru this and come out victorious. I just pray you Love your guy very much, and don't see him as a hindrance to you attaining your goals.

The deed has been done my dear... don't look back. People would call u names, don't mind dem. You would give birth safely and still gain admission next year!

I will put you in my prayers and I urge you to be strong. God Bless you my dear!

thank u love. May that feeling of love and concern u have for me always bring u good tings in life

edwife:


Now you making me feel bad,please stop crying.I really feel for you,enough of the blames.I want to help you.

What do you think you can do,what are your plans? what is your boyfriend saying?

if i can get a job before the baby becomes obvious, i would be very glad

op it is well with you.

salsera:
IF this is true. There is nothing virtuous about it.

1. He dated you in secondary school at 14years at his own age of 25years!!!
2. What do you mean you had sex at 18years? Or you think because he didn't penetrate with his p#nis means it was not sex. Cos if nothing sexual happened in those 4years then why do you still call it a relationship.
3. Why do you feel you feel you have disappointed your parents. If the relationship was legit for 6years would they not expect marriage.
4. Your baby daddy is 31years so what did he expect would happen. Was he looking towards you clocking 15years dating before belle go enter.

I seriously suspect your relationship
Cos if I heard a 26year old started to date a 14year old then he started as a paedophile. .

first,must there be an evidence of sex be4 it is calld a relationship? If that's what u think, then u are wrong. I was a virgin at that time and was nt ready for it.
Second, i had finishd schl by 14 he met me.
Third, i felt so cuz she(my mother) wantd a better life than this 4 me. U can't imagine a single parent that had been strugling 2 cater 4 her children only 4 her daughter to be pregnant at a tender age. It's worth to be disappointed about

@ you worried
I just stumbled into your worries
Please and please never think of abortion as an option,even if your parent isn't in support its your life,i mean your life.
There are several options,if they insist,you could seek the convent for assistance or other Godly gathering
Try and be strong for the baby dear.

stellytwinkle:
first,must there be an evidence of sex be4 it is calld a relationship? If that's what u think, then u are wrong. I was a virgin at that time and was nt ready for it.
Second, i had finishd schl by 14 he met me.
Third, i felt so cuz she(my mother) wantd a better life than this 4 me. U can't imagine a single parent that had been strugling 2 cater 4 her children only 4 her daughter to be pregnant at a tender age. It's worth to be disappointed about

amtheone:
@edywife.

Pls dont be offended ohhh. I want to know how this young lady can be helped. Can money be raised for her to start a business? Even though she made a mistake, I think she actually needs help.

I would really like to contribute financially towards helping her.

Actually,i sorted for loan from LAPPO (40000)bt was turnd down on the basis that i was young.
If i dont get help financially, i might succumb to my family's threat. Pls if there is any1 who can link me up with a job or with a loan to start a small business will be duly appreciated

stellytwinkle:
pls what do u think is the way out. Cause im nt financialy bouyant now not even my guy

just N500 durex could had saved you from this mess.

Youngpo413:
just N500 durex could had saved you from this mess.

They may not be able to afford it.

What about abstinence? Free and very effective.

vfactor:


Of course he will, but much depends on you!

thanks. I'v gotten it all solved out. BTW i read ur signature, y do u say that?

stellytwinkle:
thanks. I'v gotten it all solved out. BTW i read ur signature, y do u say that?

.


Hehehehehe! The internet is indeed a scary place. Here u meet lots of people with varying personalities, mentalities and reasoning ability that u couldn't have imagined. You also find scary pieces of information. Its scary.


How's ur baby and how re u doing?

vfactor:
.


Hehehehehe! The internet is indeed a scary place. Here u meet lots of people with varying personalities, mentalities and reasoning ability that can never imagine. You also find scary pieces of information. Its scary.


How's ur baby and how re u doing?

k, i see y u meant that. Babies are fine. Doc says they are twins!!! . OMG, i LOVE twins.please Wish me a safe delivery.

Youngpo413:
just N500 durex could had saved you from this mess.

pls, just blame it on my ignorance.

Phema:


They may not be able to afford it.

What about abstinence? Free and very effective.

those are bygones now. My babies are kicking. I so much adore them

Jennifer89:
op it is well with you.

amen.