We’ve all carried baggage from past relationships at
one time or another. Whether it’s from a past love,
friendship or even a family member, we carry the
baggage from these relationships with us. And it can affect everything we do. Everything.

The problem isn’t actually the baggage itself but how we allow the baggage to define us. Can we figure out who we are independent of the baggage or has the baggage created who we are?
If the baggage is defining who we are, then we owe to ourselves to release its hold over us. “Just let it go,” they say. But just letting it go is much more difficult task than it sounds. Letting go of something we have been carrying around with us for awhile isn’t something that happens overnight. But it is possible.

Here are some ways to help us begin the process of
releasing the hold our baggage has on our lives, the
decisions we make and our existing relationships.

BE WILLING TO RELEASE THE ATTACHMENT
Why we hold onto baggage is different for everyone.
We might use it to shield us from future hurt, we
might use it to help propel us into action, we might
use it to allow us to feel certain emotions and we
might use it to keep us from moving forward. Any
action motivated by the baggage we hold onto is not
serving us.
We often want to release the baggage, when in some way it is giving us something we think we need. We know it isn’t healthy but on some level we keep justifying it to ourselves. Letting go of the baggage is hard and doesn’t happen overnight, but we have to start with the affirmation that it is what we need to do.

JOURNAL
We should start writing down our thoughts, beliefs
and the behaviors that affect our mood. Be honest
and just write anything that comes to mind. Create a
judgment-free zone where we are able to be real with ourselves. As we continue to write, we will start to notice patterns and triggers. Triggers that we can
begin to recognize and change.

CHALLENGE THE STORY
We write our life’s story from our perspective. If the
story is not contributing positively to our current
reality, it is up to us to challenge it. Our story is from our point of view, as it should be. But to begin to let go of the baggage, it is helpful take a step outside of our story and write it from another perspective.
Another perspective helps us to release the overwhelming emotion we feel and can help us breakthe hold it has on us.

FIND THE POSITIVE
Every relationship serves a purpose in our lives, even the bad ones. Our goal should be to find something positive that will help us reframe how we look at the relationship.
Maybe the relationship helped define acceptable
behaviors, maybe it helped us become stronger and
more resilient, maybe it helped us become more
grateful for small moments. We can only begin to let go once we stop focusing on the bad and shift our focus to the silver lining, however small.

TREAT OTHERS WITH KINDNESS
It is easy to treat kind people with kindness but make it a goal to treat everyone with kindness – even those less deserving. This shifts our focus from past bad behaviors to future good ones. When we stop letting the bad behaviors of past relationships determine our future actions, we can begin to let go.

VISUALIZE YOUR OWN VERSION OF HAPPY
As we begin to separate ourselves from the baggage it is important to visualize what our happiness without it looks like.
How do we feel and act in our relationships with
others. How does our time alone make us feel? How
do we make decisions without the baggage as an
influence?
Once we have a clear vision of what life is like without our dependence on our baggage, it is easier to make choices with that future in mind.

RELEASE EXPECTATIONS
As we begin to act independent of our baggage, it is
important to move forward with expectations. It is
our expectations that will keep us tied the behaviors
of our past relationships. We often times have
expectations, some of which are unrealistic, without
even realizing it. That is why journaling is so
important. You will become aware of when the
baggage is creeping in.
It’s okay to be a little weary of the process. We harbor a great deal of emotion and it can be painful to get through it. If we continue to hold on to it without facing it, it will affect everything we do. Don’t wait until there is a risk of losing something wonderful to release the baggage.

https://www.powerofpositivity.com/how-to-release-attachments-to-old-relationships/

All these won't really work.

braine:
All these won't really work.

lay down your reasons why you think otherwise sire.

Very easy!
I don't have such issues.
If you don't need me, I don't need you.
Shikena!!!!!!

KanwuliaJara:
Very easy!
I don't have such issues.
If you don't need me, I don't need you.
Shikena!!!!!!

Wait till you experience some manipulative and energetically parasitic soul connections.

I had the privilege of listening to a lady friend of mine share her story......I was marvelled at how strong some people can be while subconsciously and consciously carrying baggages. Be nice to people and never judge cos you may not know the battle they maybe fighting.

Chubhie:
Wait till you experience some manipulative and energetically parasitic soul connections.

I had the privilege of listening to a lady friend of mine share her story......I was marvelled at how strong some people can be while subconsciously and consciously carrying baggages. Be nice to people and never judge cos you may not know the battle they maybe fighting.

Manipulative and energetically parastic soul connections ke?

Na juju?

KanwuliaJara:


Manipulative and energetically parastic soul connections ke?

Na juju?

@OP, Not true for everyone.

Speaking for myself, ONCE our relationship (whatever type it is) goes sour, You cease to EXIST to me. I so quickly let go, forget and move on. No baggage whatsoever.

ifyalways:
@OP, Not true for everyone.

Speaking for myself, ONCE our relationship (whatever type it is) goes sour, You cease to EXIST to me. I so quickly let go, forget and move on. No baggage whatsoever.

Agreed we are all wired differently. I used to think I was as stone cold as you not until after hearing the lady out did I take some time out to reflect on all my past and present relationships......Family,friends,business,romantic and what have you. Had to write out names and how the relationship has|Is influenced|influencing me negatively or positively. Truth be told we never totally let go of some baggages and goodies picked from some relationships.

The difference I think lies in how well we succeed in using such experiences to turn up a better version of ourselves. As long as we are humans, we are bound to experience all aspects of emotions.

KanwuliaJara:

Manipulative and energetically parastic soul connections ke?
Na juju?

Do you believe in juju?

Chubhie:
Do you believe in juju?

Absolutely NOT!
But "dem say" na so juju dey make posin act like MUMU ke!

The Journal part works for me.

It helps me put thing in perspective and re-evaluate my outlook to some issues.

Souljaboi1:
The Journal part works for me.

It helps me put think in perspective and re-evaluate my outlook to some issues.

finally, a witness comes through.