the bible passage that says he who finds a wife.... i want to understand something.did the bible mean that,you should find the wife and God would bless the union or it meant that God would give u a wife and bless the union?I am asking because I know that in churches,when u go for counselling,they would ask you if u are sure she is the will of God for u.I heard a brother say,you as a man should be the one to find a wife and make sure she falls in line with God's will for u.yet I have seen good sisters In the church and the marriage committee or another brother "that sees vision" would say she is not the one.mean while,she is also born again and spirit filled. i have also heard that u have to let God make the choice for u and with time u would learn to love her. (pls permit my write up I just didnt know how to organise my thoughts in a text.I just hope it is clear enough)

He that find a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord

Another translation(LB) he that find a wife finds a treasure and obtain favour from the Lord

It means when a man truly find his wife God will blessed, favoured, helped by the Lord. As a wife is is an help meet for the man. Eccle 4.9 says Two are better that one for they shall have a good reward from the their labour. It's a multiply effect. Marriage brings multiplication to the couple that understand it and engage it properly. marriage is for a blessing. There are blessing that you can get except you marry. It's the commandment of the Lord. God bless the first marriage in Genesis.

Let me know if you are clear please.

gratefulheart:
He that find a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord

Another translation(LB) he that find a wife finds a treasure and obtain favour from the Lord

It means when a man truly find his wife God will blessed, favoured, helped by the Lord. As a wife is is an help meet for the man. Eccle 4.9 says Two are better that one for they shall have a good reward from the their labour. It's a multiply effect. Marriage brings multiplication to the couple that understand it and engage it properly. marriage is for a blessing. There are blessing that you can get except you marry. It's the commandment of the Lord. God bless the first marriage in Genesis.

Let me know if you are clear please.

.
my question is,does tge bible passage mean that the man should search for the wife himself or ask God for a wife.

There is most times Gods kind of person for u and not a particular person selectedd by God. u are meant to search and find as a man.
this is the info u need.
http://www.titusinstitute.com/datingbible/godswillmarriage.php

quindebbie:
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my question is,does tge bible passage mean that the man should search for the wife himself or ask God for a wife.

it is the responsibility of the man to search for his wife prayerfully

you can't find until you search
.....ask and you shall..? seek and you shall..?

quindebbie:
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my question is,does tge bible passage mean that the man should search for the wife himself or ask God for a wife.

Well the sentence, "he that seeketh findeth" was used in relation to prayer.

Remember when Abraham's servant went to look for a wife for Isaac? He prayed first and then was sensitive not to her beauty but to what (in the primitiveness of revelation and faith) signs he believed will indicate. Besides it had to be among Abraham's people (genuine people of faith by application).

When you go down to Samuel seeking for a new king (after Prayer of course), you see that there were no signs given to God by Samuel, Samuel had to be sensitive to God's voice (not a predescribed fleece/sign).

I believe you can glean the answer from the above.

quindebbie:
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my question is,does tge bible passage mean that the man should search for the wife himself or ask God for a wife.

it is the responsibility of the man to search for his wife (prayerfully)

you can't find until you search
.....ask and you shall..? seek and you shall..?

Op, you raised a very good question here. let me try and see if I can make any sense here.

First off, the word says, the steps of the upright are ordered by the Lord. And who can find a virtues woman? for her price is far above Rubies. prov 31:10. what this means is that, among women, there's a virtues woman, who should be ur wife. But, she's not available for everyone to see. You have to find her, with some help. if not, how will you know her, wen you see her? that's where spiritual leading comes in.

Yes its a man duties to search for a wife, but you need divine direction and guidance to choose right.
its not enough for someone to be born again, but will you guys speak in the same language? will she believe in you? will she support ur dreams and stand by you? compatibility is very vital. I know a guy who answered God's call into ministry, his wife left him. She said she can't be a pastor's wife. Try as you may, she refused. If God was involved in that union from the start, she will just fall in line and flow with the tide.
And, how will u know, that sexually you guys will be compatible? remember u shdnt mate before 'I DO'.
Believe me, some of us women are unbearable. Yes, we born again, spirit filled, but still unbearable. disrespectful, sloppy, quick to anger. will she say yes, wen you say pls, wait for me am coming, or will she tell you that, the same Holy Spirit you have she also has?

I think wat am trying to say is that, When a man looks with the eyes of men, he may see a beautiful sister, who is also quick tempered, who should rightly fit into quiet man's house, instead of yours who is also quick tempered.
Some men can take and soak in insults from us ladies.
Some men are intimidated by intelligent women, rather want doll, so in a situation like this, you ask God to guide to a doll if you can't stand smart ladies.
Some men get bored easily, so they need creative and naughty women, (in a good way) so they need guidance to a sister like that.
Some ladies likes gold a lot, they can use the last money to buy make up. Some of us born again ladies are very competitive, brother A. bought that latest SUV for his wife, I think I deserve to have one too.
Can you put up with all these? Certain sisters belong to certain brothers
If you like food, you shd go for a good cook.

Bottom line, use your spiritual eyes to FIND. because whatever you FIND, as long as its "IN THE LORD", The Lord will bless.
if you like big hips or Hugh breast, but overlook other virtues like quietness, patience, neatness etc. Then you'll learn to put up with whatever you FOUND.

We are not robots, God allows us to make choices, so that you can enjoy life. Be adventurous, but allow the Holy Spirit to help guide you.
Peace.

Find your wife prayerfully.

Whenever you are not clear about a bible passage look for other scriptures to enlighten you and there are several of them.

The man should search through God's leading for a wife.
God brought Adam's his wife.
God directed Abraham servant to Isaac wife
Prove19.14b, a prudent wife is from is Lord
A man that want a good wife need to go to God for direction.

quindebbie:
.
my question is,does tge bible passage mean that the man should search for the wife himself or ask God for a wife.

Ah, but this Op nah female ni. why you dey find wife nah? abi na u want propose to the man?

quindebbie:
the bible passage that says he who finds a wife.... i want to understand something.did the bible mean that,you should find the wife and God would bless the union or it meant that God would give u a wife and bless the union?I am asking because I know that in churches,when u go for counselling,they would ask you if u are sure she is the will of God for u.I heard a brother say,you as a man should be the one to find a wife and make sure she falls in line with God's will for u.yet I have seen good sisters In the church and the marriage committee or another brother "that sees vision" would say she is not the one.mean while,she is also born again and spirit filled. i have also heard that u have to let God make the choice for u and with time u would learn to love her. (pls permit my write up I just didnt know how to organise my thoughts in a text.I just hope it is clear enough)

Actually we dont have to wait for a vision or d likes from God before you get married to the right woman as for a man,if u love God it would have been ur tradition to seek God's advice(wich is always d best u can get) before u make any decisions,gettin married is a decision wich has to be made rightly,now d big question how can we seek God's advice,simple enough. u weigh ur decision wit wat God's word(bible) says concernin it(dis case marriage) 1 of dem for example,d bible condemns one marrying an unbeliever.....den u pray fervently on it(nt necessarily for vision bt for divine intervention if u were headin d wrong way),get d opinions of d experienced, dey also help......so at first you wil be d 1 to find someone you like.

analice107:
Op, you raised a very good question here. let me try and see if I can make any sense here.

First off, the word says, the steps of the upright are ordered by the Lord. And who can find a virtues woman? for her price is far above Rubies. prov 31:10. what this means is that, among women, there's a virtues woman, who should be ur wife. But, she's not available for everyone to see. You have to find her, with some help. if not, how will you know her, wen you see her? that's where spiritual leading comes in.

Yes its a man duties to search for a wife, but you need divine direction and guidance to choose right.
its not enough for someone to be born again, but will you guys speak in the same language? will she believe in you? will she support ur dreams and stand by you? compatibility is very vital. I know a guy who answered God's call into ministry, his wife left him. She said she can't be a pastor's wife. Try as you may, she refused. If God was involved in that union from the start, she will just fall in line and flow with the tide.
And, how will u know, that sexually you guys will be compatible? remember u shdnt mate before 'I DO'.
Believe me, some of us women are unbearable. Yes, we born again, spirit filled, but still unbearable. disrespectful, sloppy, quick to anger. will she say yes, wen you say pls, wait for me am coming, or will she tell you that, the same Holy Spirit you have she also has?

I think wat am trying to say is that, When a man looks with the eyes of men, he may see a beautiful sister, who is also quick tempered, who should rightly fit into quiet man's house, instead of yours who is also quick tempered.
Some men can take and soak in insults from us ladies.
Some men are intimidated by intelligent women, rather want doll, so in a situation like this, you ask God to guide to a doll if you can't stand smart ladies.
Some men get bored easily, so they need creative and naughty women, (in a good way) so they need guidance to a sister like that.
Some ladies likes gold a lot, they can use the last money to buy make up. Some of us born again ladies are very competitive, brother A. bought that latest SUV for his wife, I think I deserve to have one too.
Can you put up with all these? Certain sisters belong to certain brothers
If you like food, you shd go for a good cook.

Bottom line, use your spiritual eyes to FIND. because whatever you FIND, as long as its "IN THE LORD", The Lord will bless.
if you like big hips or Hugh breast, but overlook other virtues like quietness, patience, neatness etc. Then you'll learn to put up with whatever you FOUND.

We are not robots, God allows us to make choices, so that you can enjoy life. Be adventurous, but allow the Holy Spirit to help guide you.
Peace.

Yes its a man duties to search for a wife, but you need divine direction and guidance to choose right.

It is not only the man's duty, but vice versa. The woman also has a role to play in it.

its not enough for someone to be born again, but will you guys speak in the same language?

Do you really understand what being born again means?

John 3:5-8
Jesus replied, “I assure you, no one can enter the Kingdom of God without being born of water and the Spirit.[b] 6 Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life.[c] 7 So don’t be surprised when I say, ‘You[d] must be born again.’ 8 The wind blows wherever it wants. Just as you can hear the wind but can’t tell where it comes from or where it is going, so you can’t explain how people are born of the Spirit.”

To marry is like entering into the kingdom of God. Trusting in God that it will be well with the union. Allowing the Holy Spirit to take full control of the relationship. It is called "For better, For worse". To be born again is the key to a successful relationship.

A reason a born again xtain should seek for a woman/man in the right places (church, seminars, fellowship networks, etc). Then, you will find those who will speak the same language you speak, share common interests and most importantly, the have similar mindset.

I think wat am trying to say is that, When a man looks with the eyes of men, he may see a beautiful sister, who is also quick tempered, who should rightly fit into quiet man's house, instead of yours who is also quick tempered.

GALATIANS 5:19-21
When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

Before you even think about marriage, the above list, the results of sinful nature has to be dealt with. (e.g., quarreling, jealousy, outburst of anger,wild parties and their like)--- IF I HAD TIME, I WOULD HAVE BROKEN DOWN THE LIST FOR YOU IN MORE DETAIL). But obviously, even a six year old knows that the existence of these characteristics in a marriage will result in disaster.

Some ladies likes gold a lot, they can use the last money to buy make up. Some of us born again ladies are very competitive, brother A. bought that latest SUV for his wife, I think I deserve to have one too.
Can you put up with all these? Certain sisters belong to certain brothers
If you like food, you shd go for a good cook.

1 Timothy 2:9
Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,

1 Peter 3:3-4
Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.


Philippians 4:5
Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord [is] at hand

Bottom line, use your spiritual eyes to FIND. because whatever you FIND, as long as its "IN THE LORD", The Lord will bless.
if you like big hips or Hugh breast, but overlook other virtues like quietness, patience, neatness etc. Then you'll learn to put up with whatever you FOUND.

NOW YOU ARE MAKING SENSE SIS[b][/b]

BEFORE YOU PRAY FOR A SPOUSE ..
When you choose to pray over a matter scripture clearly instructs you on ,you are mischievously living in disobedience .
For example ,before you start praying whether a brother or sister is " Gods will " for you in marriage ,kindly know it's really up to you .
Paul gives just one admonition in this regard
1 Corinthians 7:39 KJV
[39] ..she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
This rules out none believers .
To marry ONLY in The Lord ,has no specific person called Gods will but rather specific issues you consider before settling for any .
You didn't receive any brother or sister as an inheritance in Christ to be married to ,so several can fit into or not fit in..

As earlier said ,the non believer is totally out .
However ,there are others
1 Corinthians 5:11,13 KJV
[11] But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.
13] But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
A licentious person who lives like a non believer and in open sin.
It's no need praying over it whether he or she is the right person .
They are not .
Also ..those with false doctrines or better still have varying spiritual convictions
Romans 16:17-18 KJV
[17] Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.
18] For they that are such serve not our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly; and by good words and fair speeches deceive the hearts of the simple.
You are to avoid .
Furthermore ,unruly church folks who disobey spiritual authority aren't to be considered .
2 Thessalonians 3:14-15 KJV
[14] And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man, and have no company with him, that he may be ashamed.
15] Yet count him not as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.
An un accountable brother or sister is a no no even if he or she posts scriptures regularly on Facebook .
Again those with the love for money ..
1 Timothy 6:5 KJV
[5] Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is godliness: from such withdraw thyself.
Who see money as godliness .They can't be right choices too.
This is so because scriptures teach strongly on good company
From Solomon..
Proverbs 13:20 KJV
[20] He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.
To Paul
1 Corinthians 15:33 KJV
[33] Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.
Paul contextually was dealing with doctrine .
Marry someone with the same doctrinal persuasion .
This is without prejudice to other natural issues like cultural ,academic ,physical,pursuits compatibility etc which require common sense not prayers .
You can open your eyes and ears and take note of these .
However ,before you start praying or fasting or asking your prayer contractors for prophecies ,open your heart to Gods word clearly written .
Then you will see if its Gods will or not .
I call you blessed