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The Mother Or The Wife?? - Family - Nairaland

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The Mother Or The Wife?? by igbinigiejeff(m): 5:03pm On Dec 28, 2015
I have being thinking about this for sometime now. We see mother take's time to give birth to a son,take care of him to be come somebody in life;When he get's married the mother now take's the back sit in the man's life.......The question now is who should Truly came first in the life of a man?? The wife OR The Mother! I will pls like your comments to lean from.

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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Nobody: 5:08pm On Dec 28, 2015
Why compare apples to oranges? The two women have a unique role to play in a man's life. Nobody comes first, nobody comes last. There is no competition.

7 Likes

Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by olayinkajnr(m): 5:15pm On Dec 28, 2015
igbinigiejeff:
I have being thinking about this for sometime now. We see mother take's time to give birth to a son,take care of him to be come somebody in life;When he get's married the mother now take's the back sit in the man's life.......The question now is who should Truly came first in the life of a man?? The wife OR The Mother! I will pls like your comments to lean from.

Both can come first in the life of the Man. How? It's by having this notion

Man to his mum: Mum, I love you so much but the love I have for you is very different from the love I have for my wife

Man to his wife: Sweetheart, I love you so much but the love I have for you is very different from the love I have for my mum.

It might sound confusing but telling both that statement will create a feeling in the mothers heart that 'my son loves me so much and I come first in his life' and also in the wife's heart that 'my husband loves me so much and I come first in his life'

My opinion though
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Godmother(f): 5:16pm On Dec 28, 2015
Mindfulness:
Why compare apples to oranges? The two women have a unique role to play in a man's life. Nobody comes first, nobody comes last. There is no competition.

Thank you jare, dunno why people compare both. They each have their place in a man's life. But if you are a christian then you must have seen in your Bible where it says "a man shall leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife....." Which means your wife becomes your first priority. That doesn't mean your mother ceases to exists though.

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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Chidoks(f): 5:17pm On Dec 28, 2015
The two women have important roles to play in a man's life.None is superior, every role is unique .
The keyword is respect and understanding. No body stole any one, no need for comparison and competition.Both need to be friends in order to get the best from the man
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by JudgementHammer: 5:20pm On Dec 28, 2015
Op reality is what matters as d matter relates to u. If u say its ur mother, u'll find anoda man who'll say its d wife and u can't blame him cus his mother might not have really infuenced him or perhaps he didn't grow up under her

There's a popular saying that "every man has a measure of his mother in him and this measure determines how caring he will be to his wife"
But one will wonder how the man who got d inspiration to care for his wife from his mother can now hardly pay attention to his mother cuz he's been hypnotized by the wife who now enjoys the sacrifices of her mother-in-law on her husband.

Well I'll conclude by saying, don't bother who's important. Apply wisdom as ur own family case may be and as a man don't show much affection to ur mother in ur wife's presence and don't show much affection to ur wife in ur mother's presence. Also, conceal secrets that may cause conflict btwn them both. Especially if ur mother raised u as a single parent or u're the only son, then it can really be an issue

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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by missKiffy(f): 5:21pm On Dec 28, 2015
The two have different roles to play and they should never be compared, nobody comes 1st and nobody comes last

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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Nobody: 5:22pm On Dec 28, 2015
Godmother:


Thank you jare, dunno why people compare both. They each have their place in a man's life. But if you are a christian then you must have seen in your Bible where it says "a man shall leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife....." Which means your wife becomes your first priority. That doesn't mean your mother ceases to exists though.

A loving and wise mother will know how to respect her son's marriage. wink

1 Like

Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Chidoks(f): 5:23pm On Dec 28, 2015
olayinkajnr:


Both can come first in the life of the Man. How? It's by having this notion

Man to his mum: Mum, I love you so much but the love I have for you is very different from the love I have for my wife

Man to his wife: Sweetheart, I love you so much but the love I have for you is very different from the love I have for my mum.

It might sound confusing but telling both that statement will create a feeling in the mothers heart that 'my son loves me so much and I come first in his life' and also in the wife's heart that 'my husband loves me so much and I come first in his life'

My opinion though
In my opinion,there is no need for position. Everyone in a man's life is equally important. Starting from his parents, to his wife, down to his children. They are all unique,irreplaceable and important.
Give each their dues while they reciprocate.
Mutual respect,love and understanding is all that matters
Of course the love he has for them is deep and different
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by asadike(f): 5:27pm On Dec 28, 2015
I will go with d bible on dis. but if u marry a good woman this question will never come up,as she will ensure your mum is well taken care of.

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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Nobody: 5:55pm On Dec 28, 2015
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Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Nobody: 5:55pm On Dec 28, 2015
I tink mother shld b given d deserved love,care nd attentn pendin d tym she's still on diz planet earth. Nothing could be compared wit mother's love. "Good woman no dey easy to find" s/o to my mother
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by byvan03: 7:10pm On Dec 28, 2015
From the biblical point of view, the wife is his no 1 priority. They both play different role and shouldn't resort to competition , the man's immediate family is his wife and kids. It will be easier for the man if these too women in his life can relate well. It will make sense if mothers too understand where their roles ends .
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by jmoore(m): 7:28pm On Dec 28, 2015
Who should come first in the life of your father, his wife(your mother) or his mother(your grand mother).


This is not a competition. Hian!!!!!!!
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by bukatyne(f): 7:38pm On Dec 28, 2015
jmoore:
Who should come first in the life of your father, his wife(your mother) or his mother(your grand mother).


This is not a competition. Hian!!!!!!!

Lols

Abi na
Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by cococandy(f): 6:34am On Dec 29, 2015
I wonder why no one ever asks:
'the father or the husband, who should come first in a woman's life?'

Na only una get parents. Mtchew.

3 Likes

Re: The Mother Or The Wife?? by Saved2Serve: 8:44am On Dec 29, 2015
A wife will enventually be a mother someday. So treat a mother just as u want to be treated. A mother was once a wife and still is, there are good things u can learn from them. Once a man is married, there is a boundary which even his mum must respect. He is no longer that ur baby boy. Shove aside that "I carried him 9months threat" at every little thing. The wife was same 9month. Both personalities are important and if they stay within their confines and live responsibly without frictions and rancour.

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