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EPISODE 1

Uche woke up 8am that Wednesday morning feeling very weak and back to the reality that he was still unemployed. The headache was unbearable, he had too much to drink the previous night. This has been his normal routine since the last one year of his unemployment years.

'What did I even drink' he thought, (trying to remember)

Four shots of local gin (monkey tail) and two bottles of star, few drags of SK and almost half a packet of B&H. He thought about the stuffs he took and he pitied his inner organs, especially his lungs and kidney. He checked his phone which he had always kept on the window close to his bed, there was no message, no hope. He slowly got off his bed and switched on his television, it was a 14" flat cathode ray television he used when he was in the university. He searched through the channels of his CTL decoder and went directly to the channel that has been of interest and consolation for the last six months "Nat geo wild".
On his screen was Chita stalking an antelope, he has seen it before and many other predators stalking their prey. The fastest animal stealthily undetected by the antelope came to about 50m of his prey, his meal and exploded with a furious speed. in three strides, the Chita has reached its maximum speed of 120miles/hour. the kill was swift. he imagined his life,

' am I actually been stalk by poverty' he thought sadly.

He went out of his room to the sitting room, he did not see any of his family member , he felt relief. he quickly dashed to the fridge to get water, he drank about a litre of water yet the headache was still there. He took 2 tablets of paracetamol from the first aid box from one of the cabinet in the shelf in his family sitting room. He swallowed with another gulp of water.
Uche came from a family of four siblings, two girls and two boys. he was the second child and first son. the eldest ,Ebere, was a gal who was married with two kids leaving happily with her husband. The second gal, Joan, his favorites was working as a lab technician. their last brother Joe was still in school. his mother was a secondary school principal and his father, a retired civil servant.
He opened the coolers in the kitchen, he smiled went he saw rice and stew garnished with turkey meat. he thought about his sister who had prepared the meal before leaving for work, and he offered a little prayer for his sister

'God please give my sister a very good husband '.

He quickly served rice into a large breakable plate and took 2 heavy chuck of turkey meat and went straight to his room to devour the food.
He took a spoonful and was about to put it in his mouth when he remember that he had not brushed his teeth that morning, he smiled and ate the first spoon,
'I will brush later' he convinced himself.
he finished eaten the first plate, he went back and dished another, he came to his room and ate. As he was chewing the last turkey bone, he glanced at his television and saw hyena cracking the last bone of a death meat.
'we are all alike' he smile to himself.
After dishing his plate in the kitchen, he came back to his room and lay on his bed still watching wide life, this time, a pride of lion trying to hunt down a buffalo from an herd of buffalos. He admired the skills the lions employed, trying to cause pandemonium in the herd and encircle one for a kill. His phone biped, it was a text message,

'this MTN and their useless text message', he murmured inside as he sluggishly picked his phone.

He saw a number not saved on his phone, he was curious. He opened the text and read the message eyes wide open, it reads:

"This is to inform you that you are invited for an aptitude test, scheduled..........,
Venue: conference room, Sansi hotel, ordinance, Port Harcourt.
Time: 10:00am.
Check your email for details.
Drilldata Nigeria Ltd"

He read the message for the third time, to get all the details. The aptitude test was on Saturday, three days time.

'This is my opportunity, I won't miss it' , he shouted joyfully
Fred his friend w as employed in Drilldata a year ago and had informed him a month ago about the job opportunity and had encouraged him to apply, which Uche did.
He Quickly rushed into the bathroom for his morning drill. he came out feeling refreshed. Fully naked in front of his large mirror, he applied his cream while admiring himself in the mirror. He was chocolate in complexion, handsome, tall, broad shoulders, oval face, red lips, white good set of teeth, a pointing nose he heredity from his mother and bushy eyebrows from his father. Six out of seven women would pass him and looked at him twice. These features were been threaten by his way of life- frustration from joblessness, monkey tail (cheap highness), SK, Jackies and B&H. One of his friends has once mimicked him

'Uche you are very handsome in a brutish way, you will make fortune being a gigolo instead of searching for job'

Uche thought about his friend statement why looking at his dangling huge well-endowed Agba.., he smiled,


I am a complete man, I would sure have made it being a gigolo, he thought (why still smiling)

Loffowing

Uche had graduated from the university of Benin with a sharp 2.1 (Second class (upper)) in Electrical/Electronic Engineering and did his NYSC the next year. He was intelligent, hardworking, focused and had everything working according to plan until fate showed a different plan for him. The last two years after completion of his NYSC without a job had been devastating for him.
In the first year from service, he had gone to the cafe everyday day, searching and applying for jobs online. he had gone to many aptitude test, some he had reached the interview stage but none had offered him employment. As days turned to weeks, weeks to months and months to years, frustration took its toll.

His mother had been a source of encouragement, She had sometimes come in the night to pray for him. She provided cash when it was job related and had talked to many people on his behalf. she would enter his room;

' Uche put your CV and results in an envelope and give it to me', she would say
'mom, who are u giving it to this time', Uche would reply
'am giving it to pastor James, I spoke to him about you in the church and he asked me to bring your CV, you should sometimes try to go to church and be close to God' she would continue
'I will bring it to your room in a minute' Uche would interrupt before should could finish her sermon

Uche loved his mom very much even if she nagged him sometimes, he wish he had a very good job, so he could appreciate his mother. He sometimes in his closet silently prayed to God to prolong his parents' lives so they could enjoy from him when he eventually gets a job.
He had followed his family to church one Sunday and the pastor had preached a touching message. After the message, the pastor had made an alter call:
'there are 50 people in this church that God wants to give jobs, come out and drop five thousand naira on this alter and see if God will not open the gate of heaven and pour out blessings upon you, challenge God' The pastor had said.
Uche not convinced about the pastor's rhetoric, had smile to himself. People started tripping out to drop their five thousand naira. He had watched with keen interest, surprised how people responded to the alter call. He had been so absorbed by the drama when he felt a hand touching him. He quickly turned and saw his mother by his side, she had quickly slide five thousand naira into his hand and had worked back to her seat. The message had been clear to him like an handwriting on the wall. Uche had thought about one million things the money would do for him, he had wanted to put it in his pocket but had realized his mother was looking at him. He had skirmishly removed six pieces of Five hundred notes and had put it in his pocket and went to the alter with two thousand. He had dropped it sadly and worked back to his seat.

'Sarah asked God for a son and had promised to give the son back to God after not before' he had thought.

That evening, he had gone to visit Chioma, he was still wearing the native he wore to church. She had been very happy when she saw him. she had ran to him and hugged him passionately.

'my runner away boyfriend, you are looking very handsome today'. she had said
'so I was not handsome the last time I came' he had replied smiling
'no o, fine boy no pimples' she said and had started laughing seductively.

They had talked a little laughing and hugging.

Uche had felt his huge Agba hardening, he had put his hand in his pocket and stylishly trying to keep the dragon head at bail. Like she was reading his mind, Chioma had lead him into her self-contain apartment happily. Immediately they had entered, Uche held her by the waist and pull her gently towards him, he looked into her eyes and kissed her, she responded passionately eyes closed. The kisses had send shiver down her spine that weaken her legs and put her skin at edge. They both were in another world, away from the frustration of joblessness, noise and problems. Uche had smooched her soften at first while she moaned sofely. Her legs could carry her no longer, they gently fell on the bed. Still kissing, uche had explored all the curves of her body, from her breast to hips and then to her bum bum like a geographer tracing a map. As the tension increased, Uche had struggled himself out of his native like a lion struggling out of forest thicket. Chioma had removed her ear ring gently and unzipped her gown. A million pints of blood had surged through Uche's vein enroute to his already hardened Agba. He started kissing her why unbuckling her bra. They had sex passionately and both had laid on the bed satisfied and exhausted. After both had regained their strength, Chioma had gotten up and walked towards the bathroom why Uche had admired her curves from behind.

'She is really sexy' he had thought.

She was fair in complexion and Uche had a thing for fair and beautiful ladies. She was beautiful, with big firm breasts like two big ripe oranges and small waist as comparison to the big hips and ass it carried. Her legs were long straight and sexy. He had met her closed to the joint he has been visiting the last six month for cheap highness. She had fell for him the very first time she saw him.

'what is this fine soft guy doing around here' she had thought.

It didn't take time for uche to notice the affection and had played along. Chioma owns a nice boutique where she sold female clothes, shoes and bags. Though she did not attend the university, she was well spoken.
Uche was comfortable with her, apart from the fact that she was beautiful, she never ask him for money. She often try to keep him in her boutique by buying him beer. She loved and gently wish they marry one day. Though Uche like her, but for the main time, she was just a cure for congeal. He had often seen cars parked in front of her shop and big tummy men coming down from them and entering her boutique regularly. He knew they were not there to buy her goods but to program her for her services. They had always come out not buying anything and Chioma had seen them off to their car happily.

'Aristo! but who cares as far as I am using condoms' Uche had thought.

He had slept with her severally and had enjoy every bit of the action. She had often pleaded with him to sleep over, which he rarely did. Though Chioma's affection, care and sex were amazing, Uche knew that that she and the other girls he had been sleeping with were just for the main time. If finding a job was as easy as he got the girls, he would have been working in Exxon Mobil. His taste for woman was on the high side, he needed class not just a beautiful body to ejaculate into.

Uche had left her house 7:00pm and went to his regular spot, he had met some friends he had made the last few month of coming to the jungle. He had quickly ordered a bottle beer for himself, one each for three of his friends and a packet of B&H cigarette. They had survived him in many occasion when he wanted cheap highness and heard no money. Now that he had three thousand, he had to return the favors. This is one of the jungle's rules he heard learnt unconsciously. He had left there and got home 10:00pm, tipsy and high. He had went straight to his bed and slept off immediately.


On that day he received the text message for the aptitude test, his spirit was elated, an unusual strength had entered into him. He thought himself as a gladiator, in ancient Roman empire, who was about to face a dreaded opponent in the arena- the colossium. His opponent was not human, it was a dreaded beast called unemployment. It had send many to their dead in the arena but Uche was determined to defeat this demon. He had to prepared, he envisage himself as Spartacus preparing against Thiokolis. He went to his book shelf and brought out his books, they were dusty because he had not read for some time now.

'I will start reading when I come back from the cafe' he told himself.

He quickly dressed up and headed straight for the cafe to printout the details and requirement for the aptitude test. As he came out his house, a fresh cool breeze blew on him like it was direct from Atlantic ocean.

'This is a good sign of success' he thought and smiled to himself like he just received the Holy spirit of success.

Source: http://www.naijarex.com/category/literature/