[img]http://2.bp..com/-kG5SspAslck/UiV75bSJZiI/AAAAAAAAieU/Ow9f0cC4swI/s500/Nigerian+father+bathing+baby.jpg[/img]

http://www.romancemeetslife.com/2013/09/bathing-baby-nigerian-fathers-who-are.html

Don't come bck to tell us how d child died after bathing, see as he leave d baby inside water na so them they baff baby 4 him village

where are you from?

Awwww so cute....the bath has space for the baby's head now. Some Nigerian men are blessed,ts not a matter of the wife's responsiblity alone,I wish I marry a man that can help me out like this..

Titilayooni:
Awwww so cute....the bath has space for the baby's head now. Some Nigerian men are blessed,ts not a matter of the wife's responsiblity alone,I wish I marry a man that can help me out like this..

He is not helping you. He is bathing his baby so that his baby will be clean. Just make sure you stay away from men that feel caring for a child is a mothers job. It is both parents job. Do not be brainwashed

fem29:


He is not helping you. He is bathing his baby so that his baby will be clean. Just make sure you stay away from men that feel caring for a child is a mothers job. It is both parents job. Do not be brainwashed

Lol... Careful before the anti feminist squad swoop in here

fem29:


He is not helping you. He is bathing his baby so that his baby will be clean. Just make sure you stay away from men that feel caring for a child is a mothers job. It is both parents job. Do not be brainwashed

Gbam
We did it together
He come resemble you more
You must take larger responsibilities

fem29:


He is not helping you. He is bathing his baby so that his baby will be clean. Just make sure you stay away from men that feel caring for a child is a mothers job. It is both parents job. Do not be brainwashed

so what you saying is, when you give birth, you going to draw a roster for who bathes and feeds the baby between you and the father of the child?

Good luck with that. let's know how that works for you.

Ioannes:


so what you saying is, when you give birth, you going to draw a roster for who bathes and feeds the baby between you and the father of the child?

Good luck with that. let's know how that works for you.

I already have 2 kids hun. If you are ready to have kids. Be ready for the responsibilities of taking care of them.

Unless you marry a housewife whose sole job is to take care of house and kids. You cannot have your cake and eat it.

DollyParton1:

Lol... Careful before the anti feminist squad swoop in here

Let dem come . I am not even a feminist in the true sense of the word. I just want what is fair.

fem29:


I already have 2 kids hun. If you are ready to have kids. Be ready for the responsibilities of taking care of them.

Unless you marry a housewife whose sole job is to take care of house and kids. You cannot have your cake and eat it.

so you honestly saying here that you shared the bathing and feeding of the two kids with their father

why does that sound like a lie to me.

Ioannes:


so you honestly saying here that you shared the bathing and feeding of the two kids with their father

why does that sound like a lie to me.

That's cos women are slaves where you come from

Dyt:

That's cos women are slaves where you come from

you don't deserve a response. so bite it.

Ioannes:


so you honestly saying here that you shared the bathing and feeding of the two kids with their father

why does that sound like a lie to me.

My husband isn't with us all the time but when he is best believe he does his fair share of parenting ie feeding nappies bathing etc.

The problem with you nigerian men is that you all are just too damn lazy!. I repeat if your wife is working and contributes to the family expenses you had better get off your butt and do the needful!. You want to sit on the sofa watching TV whilst she runs around like a headless chicken. Hell to the no with that shite

fem29:


My husband isn't with us all the time but when he is best believe he does his fair share of parenting ie feeding nappies bathing etc.

The problem with you nigerian men is that you all are just too damn lazy!. I repeat if your wife is working and contributes to the family expenses you had better get off your butt and do the needful!. You want to sit on the sofa watching TV whilst she runs around like a headless chicken. Hell to the no with that shite

let me tell you a little bit of something madam cos I sense you are more reasonable than most peeps I come across on this forum.

I'm not saying there's anything wrong in partners helping each other out or stuff. in fact it is encouraged and time spent together helps to develop bonds between the two.

I cook and and I clean, no biggie, and no biggie doing it for the woman I love.

truth is that some roles are TRADITIONALLY suited to some than others.

you in your first comment to that lady made it sound like as if its a compulsory thing and she must demand of it from her husband.

to me there is a fantastic hypocrisy going on. y'all claim that men must do household chores because you aren't his slave.

my question is, when was the last time you picked up a duster and a bucket of water and washed the car? even if you take your car to the car wash daily or you have a chauffeur, who pays for most of these services.

when was the last time you actually took the cars for servicing or got under the hood to fix something or even changed the tires yourself while your husband was backing the baby and watching you.

in our bid to equate men and women, we turn logic on it's head.

men and women are equal, but they aren't the same.

God created woman different from man. that's why women have natural mothering instincts and are softer and better suited for some roles, while men are created to be provider and protectors of their family.

I may be old school, but that has worked for centuries.

one of the major ways a woman shows she loves her man is taking care of the home, while the man shows he loves his family by providing for them. that's the natural order(and it doesn't matter if the wife earns 10x more than the man, he is still the provider).

all this feminist bull crap only puts tension in the home, where the woman struggles to emasculate her husband so that she can wear the pants in the home and the man feels resentful of her.

I sure hope you know where to draw the line cos even if you're married to a white man, no man ordinarily would wish to be emasculated.

Ioannes:

let me tell you a little bit of something madam cos I sense you are more reasonable than most peeps I come across on this forum.
I'm not saying there's anything wrong in partners helping each other out or stuff. in fact it is encouraged and time spent together helps to develop bonds between the two.
I cook and and I clean, no biggie, and no biggie doing it for the woman I love.
truth is that some roles are TRADITIONALLY suited to some than others.
you in your first comment to that lady made it sound like as if its a compulsory thing and she must demand of it from her husband.
to me there is a fantastic hypocrisy going on. y'all claim that men must do household chores because you aren't his slave.
my question is, when was the last time you picked up a duster and a bucket of water and washed the car? even if you take your car to the car wash daily or you have a chauffeur, who pays for most of these services.
when was the last time you actually took the cars for servicing or got under the hood to fix something or even changed the tires yourself while your husband was backing the baby and watching you.
in our bid to equate men and women, we turn logic on it's head.
men and women are equal, but they aren't the same.
God created woman different from man. that's why women have natural mothering instincts and are softer and better suited for some roles, while men are created to be provider and protectors of their family.
I may be old school, but that has worked for centuries.
one of the major ways a woman shows she loves her man is taking care of the home, while the man shows he loves his family by providing for them. that's the natural order(and it doesn't matter if the wife earns 10x more than the man, he is still the provider).
all this feminist bull crap only puts tensi
on in the home, where the woman struggles to emasculate her husband so that she can wear the pants in the home and the man feels resentful of her.
I sure hope you know where to draw the line cos even if you're married to a white man, no man ordinarily would wish to be emasculated.

No, you did not just compare childcare with carwash!!!
Hian!!!

So you get emasculated because you are caring for your kids? I mean your own kids o!!! Who bears your father's surname and not your wife's.

And your argument holds no water if your wife contributes financially to the upkeep of the family. If she is sharing your "traditional duties" with you, it is normal that you share hers with her too

Dyt:


That's cos women are slaves where you come from

Lol...

Ioannes:


you don't deserve a response. so bite it.

Sorry master

DollyParton1:


No, you did not just compare childcare with carwash!!!
Hian!!!

So you get emasculated because you are caring for your kids? I mean your own kids o!!! Who bears your father's surname and not your wife's.

And your argument holds no water if your wife contributes financially to the upkeep of the family. If she is sharing your "traditional duties" with you, it is normal that you share hers with her too

like I said I see nothing wrong with the couples helping each other.

But you just made my point for me. child care shouldn't be compared with car wash or car servicing.

if God or nature has deemed it fit to put a child's food on the chest of it's mother, who do you think should take the lead on child nurturing and child care?

please read my earlier response. I'm in no way a chauvinist. I believe in helping the woman I love if just to ease her stress and bond with the kids at the same time. it's a win win.

But I'd object if she insists that because we are equal we should split the duties equally.

what most women who are claiming gender equality don't know is that "the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world", according to a Chinese saying.

it may be a man's world, but women are the actual rulers who allow men to pretend to be in charge.

you want to give up that position just so as to compete with the man on who wears the trousers in the home?

Ioannes:


like I said I see nothing wrong with the couples helping each other.

When you are caring for your child, you are not helping your wife out. You are simply carrying out your duty as a parent of that child(ren)

But you just made my point for me. child care shouldn't be compared with car wash or car servicing.

You actually did compare child care with carwash and carservice.

if God or nature has deemed it fit to put a child's food on the chest of it's mother, who do you think should take the lead on child nurturing and child care?

The breast on the female chest is the most important tool for child care abi? Issorrai.
So being expected to take care of your child(ren) when ever you are available means the mom is relegating her duties to you or what?
We all know most men cannot cope if we are to let u do most of the child nurturing. No one wants you to lead in that aspect.

please read my earlier response. I'm in no way a chauvinist. I believe in helping the woman I love if just to ease her stress and bond with the kids at the same time. it's a win win.

The last part of this paragraph screams out the chauvinism you are trying so much to hide.

But I'd object if she insists that because we are equal we should split the duties equally.

what most women who are claiming gender equality don't know is that "the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world", according to a Chinese saying.

it may be a man's world, but women are the actual rulers who allow men to pretend to be in charge.

you want to give up that position just so as to compete with the man on who wears the trousers in the home?

This is where you are getting it all wrong. You are not asked to care for kids because of gender equality. No.
You should split the duties of childcare with her because those are your kids, you are their parent as she is too. You go out to work and she goes out to work too. And you should be involved in bringing up your kid. Money, car servicing and the likes cannot be equated with an all round parental love and care in a child's life.

And you fathers and husbands keep wondering why those kids grow up and tend to appreciate their mothers more. You have equal responsibility to care and train your kids, but you leave it to your wife alone because she is the one with the breast. Lol... As if an breast u wan use bath pikin or change nappies. Or na inside breast brain dey.

All in all, you are a chauvinist. It written all over your post. You don't have to deny who you are

Some men actually enjoy bathing and caring for a baby, even though these are traditionally considered female roles.

My point is some nairalanders, when they have nothing to do, open threads mocking men who bath babies. This, to me is an extremely s.tupid and ignorant way to reason.

For example, a nler on this thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/1425558/nairalander-bathing-baby-changing-diaper

is caring for a baby, he was not forced and neither is he complaining, so who are the people carrying such things on their heads?

DollyParton1:

When you are caring for your child, you are not helping your wife out. You are simply carrying out your duty as a parent of that child(ren)


You actually did compare child care with carwash and carservice.


The breast on the female chest is the most important tool for child care abi? Issorrai.
So being expected to take care of your child(ren) when ever you are available means the mom is relegating her duties to you or what?
We all know most men cannot cope if we are to let u do most of the child nurturing. No one wants you to lead in that aspect.




The last part of this paragraph screams out the chauvinism you are trying so much to hide.




This is where you are getting it all wrong. You are not asked to care for kids because of gender equality. No.
You should split the duties of childcare with her because those are your kids, you are their parent as she is too. You go out to work and she goes out to work too. And you should be involved in bringing up your kid. Money, car servicing and the likes cannot be equated with an all round parental love and care in a child's life.

And you fathers and husbands keep wondering why those kids grow up and tend to appreciate their mothers more. You have equal responsibility to care and train your kids, but you leave it to your wife alone because she is the one with the breast. Lol... As if an breast u wan use bath pikin or change nappies. Or na inside breast brain dey.

All in all, you are a chauvinist. It written all over your post. You don't have to deny who you are

lmao. are you married? because if you are then I'd just want to know how many time your husband bathes the kids and feeds them and changes their nappies, backs them and so on, and still goes out to work while you take a much deserved maternity leave.

I never said it was wrong for the man to care for his kids, read my response again in context with the poster I was responding to okay? besides caring for the child is more than just bathing the child which was what started this argument in the first place.

I can also bond with my kids by taking them out for basketball practice or shopping at the mall, taking them to school and picking them up when they close and a million other ways.

and yes, the breasts on the woman's chest is the primary tool of child care and I'm surprised you are even arguing that. even the basest of animals have got a pair to suckle their young with.

a new born that doesn't suckle is as good as dead. or you think bathing the baby is the primary care for the child.

no matter how much time a man spends caring for his kids, there will always be that extra special bond of child and mother. for example, if I asked you if you celebrated mother's day some few days ago, you will answer in the affirmative, yet can you tell us without Googling it when father's day is celebrated?

it's alright, you can call me a chauvinist. it's your opinion, not necessarily right.

when you get married split the household chores with your husband right down the middle.

please just mention my moniker when you decide to write about it on Nairaland. I'll gladly oblige you the time of day.

Ioannes:


lmao. are you married? because if you are then I'd just want to know how many time your husband bathes the kids and feeds them and changes their nappies, backs them and so on, and still goes out to work while you take a much deserved maternity leave.

I never said it was wrong for the man to care for his kids, read my response again in context with the poster I was responding to okay? besides caring for the child is more than just bathing the child which was what started this argument in the first place.

I can also bond with my kids by taking them out for basketball practice or shopping at the mall, taking them to school and picking them up when they close and a million other ways.

and yes, the breasts on the woman's chest is the primary tool of child care and I'm surprised you are even arguing that. even the basest of animals have got a pair to suckle their young with.

a new born that doesn't suckle is as good as dead. or you think bathing the baby is the primary care for the child.

no matter how much time a man spends caring for his kids, there will always be that extra special bond of child and mother. for example, if I asked you if you celebrated mother's day some few days ago, you will answer in the affirmative, yet can you tell us without Googling it when father's day is celebrated?

it's alright, you can call me a chauvinist. it's your opinion, not necessarily right.

when you get married split the household chores with your husband right down the middle.

please just mention my moniker when you decide to write about it on Nairaland. I'll gladly oblige you the time of day.

First of all, there is no way in hell or even high waters that I will end up with a guy like u, so yeah my husband will bathe and feed the baby while I take maternity leave, if necessary. Where I come from, women are not slaves.
You are probably the only working adult in your marriage, cos if our wife can combine working and childcare, why can't you do the same.

Lol.... U did not just say the breast is the primary tool of childcare, and a neonate who doesn't suckle is as good as dead?
So a woman who adopted a baby has failed in terms of childcare cos she can't breastfeed or a baby whose mother passed away at birth is as good as dead? Did u re-read what you wrote at all?

So how did u think this special bond between moms and their children came about? You don't think it has to do with women doing almost all the caring for your child. You should at one point in time come across those kids who share a special bond with their dad, their reason is that their dad was the dominant childcare giver during their childhood.

Fathers day is celebrated on every 2nd Sunday in June. I need no Google for that.

So you can act as your kids chauffeur and shopping buddy, but God forbid that you are caught backing or, feeding them, Or even cooking for them or changing their diapers and couple of other duties. Pray tell me what's your fear? It makes you less a man or what?

And please don't mix things up, childcare duties is different from house chores.
And yea my husband will help me with the housechores and no, he won't be dead or emasculated if he does.

DollyParton1:



First of all, there is no way in hell or even high waters that I will end up with a guy like u, so yeah my husband will bathe and feed the baby while I take maternity leave, if necessary. Where I come from, women are not slaves.
You are probably the only working adult in your marriage, cos if our wife can combine working and childcare, why can't you do the same.

Lol.... U did not just say the breast is the primary tool of childcare, and a neonate who doesn't suckle is as good as dead?
So a woman who adopted a baby has failed in terms of childcare cos she can't breastfeed or a baby whose mother passed away at birth is as good as dead? Did u re-read what you wrote at all?

So how did u think this special bond between moms and their children came about? You don't think it has to do with women doing almost all the caring for your child. You should at one point in time come across those kids who share a special bond with their dad, their reason is that their dad was the dominant childcare giver during their childhood.

Fathers day is celebrated on every 2nd Sunday in June. I need no Google for that.

So you can act as your kids chauffeur and shopping buddy, but God forbid that you are caught backing or, feeding them, Or even cooking for them or changing their diapers and couple of other duties. Pray tell me what's your fear? It makes you less a man or what?

And please don't mix things up, childcare duties is different from house chores.
And yea my husband will help me with the housechores and no, he won't be dead or emasculated if he does.

My dear, you have said it all.

Ioannes:


let me tell you a little bit of something madam cos I sense you are more reasonable than most peeps I come across on this forum.

I'm not saying there's anything wrong in partners helping each other out or stuff. in fact it is encouraged and time spent together helps to develop bonds between the two.

I cook and and I clean, no biggie, and no biggie doing it for the woman I love.

truth is that some roles are TRADITIONALLY suited to some than others.

you in your first comment to that lady made it sound like as if its a compulsory thing and she must demand of it from her husband.

to me there is a fantastic hypocrisy going on. y'all claim that men must do household chores because you aren't his slave.

my question is, when was the last time you picked up a duster and a bucket of water and washed the car? even if you take your car to the car wash daily or you have a chauffeur, who pays for most of these services.

when was the last time you actually took the cars for servicing or got under the hood to fix something or even changed the tires yourself while your husband was backing the baby and watching you.

in our bid to equate men and women, we turn logic on it's head.

men and women are equal, but they aren't the same.

God created woman different from man. that's why women have natural mothering instincts and are softer and better suited for some roles, while men are created to be provider and protectors of their family.

I may be old school, but that has worked for centuries.

one of the major ways a woman shows she loves her man is taking care of the home, while the man shows he loves his family by providing for them. that's the natural order(and it doesn't matter if the wife earns 10x more than the man, he is still the provider).

all this feminist bull crap only puts tension in the home, where the woman struggles to emasculate her husband so that she can wear the pants in the home and the man feels resentful of her.

I sure hope you know where to draw the line cos even if you're married to a white man, no man ordinarily would wish to be emasculated.

Again I repeat unless your wife is a housewife, all the things you do are not 'helping' her! You are cooking food to eat, cleaning your house and caring for your child. Why can't you get it.

How many times do you wash car, everyday?. Nobody is saying cut the the work down the middle but be ready to have things that are your responsibility around the house and do it without wanting to be thanked a million times!

You know, even if your wife is a stay at home mum, you the father of the child can still help her. Being a Mum is harder than most 9-5 jobs (hey your boss isn't as crazy as a baby's demands and you get a break. Mother's don't). Anyone can drive a child to the mall, pay bills and play basketball with them (the driver, their coach, my brother, the guy I'm cheating on you with etc). A father is the one who provides the things said child cannot get outside.

Guys who fight these things on NL are usually unmarried men. Do you hear the men we know whom are fathers day stuff like "I have never changed diapers, never bathe my child" they simply keep quiet when they are these threads and the single men commenting on it.

Meanwhile, I'd be afraid of using that bathtub, all that water. Nigerian babies are not buttie enough to lie obediently in one place.

Dyt:


Gbam
We did it together
He come resemble you more
You must take larger responsibilities

Na who the pikin resemble pass abi?

Onegai:
You know, even if your wife is a stay at home mum, you the father of the child can still help her. Being a Mum is harder than most 9-5 jobs (hey your boss isn't as crazy as a baby's demands and you get a break. Mother's don't). Anyone can drive a child to the mall, pay bills and play basketball with them (the driver, their coach, my brother, the guy I'm cheating on you with etc). A father is the one who provides the things said child cannot get outside.

Guys who fight these things on NL are usually unmarried men. Do you hear the men we know whom are fathers day stuff like "I have never changed diapers, never bathe my child" they simply keep quiet when they are these threads and the single men commenting on it.

Meanwhile, I'd be afraid of using that bathtub, all that water. Nigerian babies are not buttie enough to lie obediently in one place.

I thought I was the only one who noticed that .

These ones when they marry will calm down too.

cococandy:

Na who the pikin resemble pass abi?

cococandy:

Na who the pikin resemble pass abi?

Of course. All firstborns resemble their fathers and that is the child that will shack him the most. Do you know all the crazy stuff my father did for his firstborn?! He chartered everything Mothercare, cleared out John Lewis (the U.K. version of Nordstrom not even freaking cheap Macy's!), and went to some pricey boutiques. Even the photoshoot was done abroad. To my father, that was The Prince That Was Promised/Azor Ahai Reborn/Jon Snow (this is funnier if you've read Game Of Thrones, ASOIAF). Papa changed those diapers happily! even though the firstborn grew up to be more like a Ramsey Bolton (I have to go and tell la familia that this is his new nickname behind his back )

fem29:


Again I repeat unless your wife is a housewife, all the things you do are not 'helping' her! You are cooking food to eat, cleaning your house and caring for your child. Why can't you get it.

How many times do you wash car, everyday?. Nobody is saying cut the the work down the middle but be ready to have things that are your responsibility around the house and do it without wanting to be thanked a million times!

madam, I think we are on the same page. read my response again. I have no qualms, in fact couples helping each other is the best.

and yes, they are helping each other because they are "helpmates". I'm sure you realise the word "helpmate" refers mainly to married couples right?

it is the responsibility of both parents to care for their children and there are a million ways to do that, not just bathing the kids.

you are saying that if I don't bathe my kids that means I don't care for them, and I am saying you are wrong. I can care first them in some million other tangible ways.

DollyParton1:



First of all, there is no way in hell or even high waters that I will end up with a guy like u, so yeah my husband will bathe and feed the baby while I take maternity leave, if necessary. Where I come from, women are not slaves.
You are probably the only working adult in your marriage, cos if our wife can combine working and childcare, why can't you do the same.

Lol.... U did not just say the breast is the primary tool of childcare, and a neonate who doesn't suckle is as good as dead?
So a woman who adopted a baby has failed in terms of childcare cos she can't breastfeed or a baby whose mother passed away at birth is as good as dead? Did u re-read what you wrote at all?

So how did u think this special bond between moms and their children came about? You don't think it has to do with women doing almost all the caring for your child. You should at one point in time come across those kids who share a special bond with their dad, their reason is that their dad was the dominant childcare giver during their childhood.

Fathers day is celebrated on every 2nd Sunday in June. I need no Google for that.

So you can act as your kids chauffeur and shopping buddy, but God forbid that you are caught backing or, feeding them, Or even cooking for them or changing their diapers and couple of other duties. Pray tell me what's your fear? It makes you less a man or what?

And please don't mix things up, childcare duties is different from house chores.
And yea my husband will help me with the housechores and no, he won't be dead or emasculated if he does.

don't worry, I wasn't proposing just yet, Lol. I guess we will have to agree to disagree. no offence intended and none taken. have a great weekend ahead.