Paper-bag marriage is a Nigerian term used to refer to young people of opposite sex who are not legally joined by law, tradition or religion but stay together as married couple. Common signs of this is seen when a young woman starts packing her belongings gradually from her father's house, in little bags, to live with a man who is barely known by the parents. Young girls might systematically do this during weekends and other times, when they visit. It is often amazing that the man and woman could live for years and produce children that would come of age without seeing any need to back the illegal union with the normal procedures. This menace is becoming common in our societies. I witnessed a marriage ceremony some months back where the couple's first child was already in JSS 2!!!

Below are some of the clear causes of Paper-bag Marriage:

1) Poverty: Most young girls have come to embrace paper-bag marriage because they see it as an escape route from poverty. This is common with young women from very humble backgrounds. As soon as they discover that the man is financially comfortable, they wouldn't care whether he pays a dime on them or not! Although, some societies greatly frown at this; in most parts of Igbo land, for example, if the young woman dies unmarried in the man's house, the man would be held responsible because the woman's people do not recognize him as a son in-law.

2) The need for privacy: Many young women have fallen into the trap of paper-bag marriage because they were in dire need of privacy; they wanted a life free from the preying eyes of their parents. In doing this, they discover it is too late leave when pregnancy sets in. What do you expect when you throw yourself at a man without parental consent? He's not your brother...e go give you belle yanfu yanfu!

3) Domestic abuse: Many young women have resigned their fate to paper-bag marriage because they could no longer bear the emotional pains and torture associated with domestic abuse. Such abuse could come from step-parents, step-brother, step-sister, a brutal uncle or aunty or even unreasonable guardians. They would normally opt for anything that could bring an end to the pains.

4) Age: Age is another reason why a woman might go into paper-bag marriage. She might feel that age is no longer on her side...may be, she is approaching 30. Even when the man is not ready, she would get pregnant for him and start living with him as wife.

5) The irresponsible attitude of some young men: Some young men find it difficult to control their John-Thomas! At the slightest given opportuny, they impregnate a girl, knowing fully well that they are not ready and capable of catering for a wife and child. When this happens, the girl would be forced to give birth and start living with him as wife. Some of these men would boastfully refer to the woman as 'My wife' when they are discussing with you! Who dash you wife? Her papa know you?

This type of illegal union is strange to the African culture. It is an abuse on the African tradition; to negate the dowry/bride price, no matter how small the money could be. On the other hand, there's a school of thought that believes that this trend has become necessary because of the financial incapacity being struggled against by young men in our societies riddled with unemployment!

Readers views are welcomed.

Good Afternoon!

CC: RoyalRoy

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Rapmoney:

bro wetin happen nah

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Bro..you spot on. One major cause is Ignorance, apart from that of poverty the rest could have been avoided to an extent. It is a menace and this just a form of partnership as it exist abroad.

tosyne2much:
Rapmoney, you're one of the few Nairalanders I respect so much. This write-up is awesome and insightful

Thank you very much; I appreciate it a lot!

Another Sensible Thread from rapmoney.
Kudos.

ichommy:
Another Sensible Thread from rapmoney.

Kudos.

Thanks bro!

High price tags most parents place on their daughters is another factor. When the giy can't afford the expensive bride price and other marital requirements made by the girl's parents, He has no choice but to keep the lady as wife. Some believe once the lady drops two or three kids, the parents will have no choice but to accept whatever he comes with.