Wife,and I were arguing when its safe to have sex after delivery..we went to google,it prescribed at least six weeks either natural birth, or C-S..

She insisted on waiting for 3months before anything,saying that Google opinions isnt conclusive.

Pls note that it was just a normal discussion, not that am under any pressure sexually..

is ur wife kpomo sweet? sorry to ask

Anecdotally, I think for most women it's back to normal at 4 months after. Are we scaring her? I wish I had known these things, so I would have been more prepared as to what happened rather than "surprise!".

OP, it's not all bad and it's not all pushing daisies. It's actually the best time to bond with your husband, if he plays his cards right and you do your part, your marriage will be strengthened smiley and so many girls do 3 hours of pushing, produce a baby and are back to business as usual 1 month after. Every woman is different.

it's Mother Nature's way of protecting the species (after doing her best to kill it grin). Nature wants to make sure the newborn gets the best chance at survival and nurture by Exclusive Breastfeeding, Baby's need for constant attention (the human being is the most helpless of all animals at birth, it could die easily compared to all other animals) and Hormonal changes which affect her libido. This makes the mother not want to get pregnant anytime soon so she pushes the father away because she's not in the mood for sex. And the newborn gets breastmilk and attention required during the crucial stages.

So most women are fine by 4 months postpartum but depending on things like how traumatic labour was, it could take longer for some mums. So yeah, sex will be going through the motions for that time (your doctor will recommend KY jelly and encourage you to be patient with madam). The best way to overcome this is for the husband to help out with the baby and domestic chores. I'm serious. A nurse asked mothers in Healthcare section and almost all of them replied that the more the husband helped out, the more sex happened. Your wife will feel guilty and want to reward you for your loving care. Mentally what happens is that she acknowledges you're part of the parental bond when you do so and welcomes you back in (it will take a while before she becomes enthusiastic but at least you will be shining her Congo till then).

http://www.whattoexpect.com/family/6-common-sex-after-pregnancy-problems-and-solutions

http://www.babycenter.com/0_lets-talk-about-sex-after-the-baby_11802.bc

I kind of feel they should make fathers attend birthing classes or antenatal classes once in a while. Someone should organise these Mommy-Daddy-and-Me classes

It's an emotional response, not just physically. Do the above mentioned and take things slow.

six weeks is the recommended period but some women heal fully much earlier than that. Depends on how she heals.

And for above comment, this is family section pls.

eagleccentric:
six weeks is the recommended period but some women heal fully much earlier than that. Depends on how she heals.

And for above comment, this is family section pls.

But do you realise it is the "Family section", not the "Religious (False Morality) Section"? Do you want to take a minute to think that the OP said adults only?

Nigerians are funny: a husband comes to ask married couples about sexuality within his marriage. An apparently single guy gets uncomfortable with details. Because Sex is dirrrttyyyy, even if God created the organs for it and has santicified it during Matrimony

Depends on her. Some start at 4 weeks, immediately after lochia, after 6 week check up etc. Depends on her state and how traumatic she felt the delivery was.

okay I'm starting to resign myself to being actionless for a while

op it all depends on individual so despite what ever we say here, it boils down to what your wive feels is OK for her. I HV seen ppl who made their husband wait 6 months, personally 4 weeks will do.all d best.

Onegai:


But do you realise it is the "Family section", not the "Religious (False Morality) Section"? Do you want to take a minute to think that the OP said adults only?

Nigerians are funny: a husband comes to ask married couples about sexuality within his marriage. An apparently single guy gets uncomfortable with details. Because Sex is dirrrttyyyy, even if God created the organs for it and has santicified it during Matrimony

I wasn't referring to your quote pls, i was referring to HARDBUOI or whatever his/her name is. Your post may have come in while i was writing so its as if i was referring to you. BTW, your post was quite educative. Thanks

eagleccentric:


I wasn't referring to your quote pls, i was referring to HARDBUOI or whatever his/her name is. Your post may have come in while i was writing so its as if i was referring to you. BTW, your post was quite educative. Thanks

Okay bros. No vex

She can make you come through MouthAction. You must not penetrate if she is not ready to have it any time soon.

Onegai:


Okay bros. No vex

i vex small sha, but since op said adults only, i must needs behave like one

It all depends on the body although babycenter says 6weeks,but w all heal differently, just like when u have a cut and has to be stitched, d person with whom u were stitched the same time might not heal as fast as u. That shouldn't bring friction much,just try and communicate.

I think six weeks after delivery is too soon.
Most women are still sore and tender and heavy with breast milk to bother about sex at six weeks.

For all practical purposes, three months sounds reasonable.
This is the time most women tend to tune in to their husbands' advances.

However, it is known that some who find it difficult to wait that long start earlier.

Chaii my brother.