http://justspreadit.com/2016/08/24/the-stupidest-things-olu-falae-wants-you-to-believe-about-his-being-the-fall-guy-amongst-all-the-78-year-olds-ex-nsa-dasuki-spoiled-with-arms-deal-dollars/

By Hellyjay S.

The EFCC has been grilling SDP’s chairman Olu Falae who is just recovering from the trauma of being snatched and trafficked across seven mountains and seven rivers in some Ondo forest last year. He’s woozy now, feeling much older, having answered questions about the N100 million the PDP dumped in his lap last year to support its candidate Goodluck Jonathan.

The Ondo farmer could have been sick—or feigning sickness—for one of three things: lying too much and getting himself in a bind; dreading the day he’ll stand in the dock, speaking is and was on the booty he got from ex-NSA Sambo Dasuki. How to pay back, in case he reaches for plea bargain, could also give him a splitting headache. And Parkinson, you know, is at the door.

For a bent, old cassava farmer, N100 million is worth a king’s ransom. And for a leader of a mosquito party that can’t boast of deep pockets as members, coughing up N100 million could send his blood pressure galloping.

And…Oh! My! My!! Those Ibrahim Magu’s boys—there’s something about them working on you: they scare the pants off you, and you can’t run nowhere.

At 78, Papa Falae is no longer a spring chicken. So let him forget bailing out to Panama like Olisa Metuh and others wanted to do. Even if he can, he has no bolthole to hide–unlike others. Let’s say he has one, because he was once a finance minister. Yet nobody will wrest him off the EFCC claws in the first place.

In any case, Falae is still unlike the other olds from the south-south and the north who got slices of the $2.1 billion Dasukigate scam. Tony Anenih, Edwin Clark and their colleagues have younger idiots—in the NDA, IPOB, Arewa Youth Forum, and on the corridor of power—whom they have pushed forward to secure soft landing—or to do some brinkmanship to keep the EFCC at bay.

But elder Falae is more of a loner than a party man. Maybe because he went to Yale where they school you to act preppy—and keep the University of Chicago alums like Bola Tinubu at an arm’s length. Or because the old man just admires his own resume so much he feels too big for his boots:

"I have my integrity intact. I was a former MD of a bank, I was a former minister and a former secretary to the government of the federation…. Based on my integrity, these allegations should be discarded. At 78, what will I be doing with public funds"

Ok. In the twilight of his life, he doesn’t need N100 million.

The man of integrity can, however, use some of it the EFCC said he stashed in his own account:

"However, investigations revealed that he deposited N60 million into SDP’s account while he kept N40 million. We told him that he should return the N40 million, but he has not been forthcoming. We have no other option than to charge him to court"

Falae is a penny pincher, by training. Certainly, that chicken feed won’t go for plucking a 28-year-old virgin for a wife—or for acquiring other vanities. You can be sure it’s just to cover his spending on what a 78-year-old man needs: Pampers, false teeth, walking sticks, eyeglasses, hankies, insulin, Viagra, and annual prostate medical check-ups.

You see. Public money can get politician Falae all that—for supporting a well-moneyed sitting president he knew was a jackass.

Well, Falae been arguing Anenih gave the SDP the money. And for some comic relief, the party, about 200,000-strong nationwide, is claiming it’s a better opposition the APC fears:

"This is nothing but harassment. They want to distract us from the coming Ondo election which we are set to win[/size][size=8pt]"

But all these fibs and fables and bragging won’t wash, pop.

The SDP can’t help either. The OPC from his region has lost his sting, too. And the old-boys network he belongs, the Afenifere, has got its members quaking to the bones now. The EFCC may soon sniff them out. Ondo Gov. Segun Mimiko helped Jonathan spread the loot to them, too, for endorsement.

Did we just say nobody will help Falae in the whole of southwest? Ok. [url]We[/url] take it back. We see hope—on the south-western landscape, hundreds of mile away from Falae’s farm, in the commercial city of Africa, particularly in the Lagos central district.

Oh! How Falae earnestly needs Bourdilion now. There you have a family of wheeler-dealers, the best SANs money can buy, well-heeled Yoruba kids who won’t bat an eyelid plonking down the miserable N100 million the old man is lying to cover up, and lots more. The Lion of Bourdilion himself is a storied strategist. He can help Falae swing the whole thing at the snap of a finger. Tinubu won’t even mind the old man has always been a grump and antagonist. He’ll do it for Odua’s sake. After all he welcomed back former Gov. Segun Osoba, another old whiner who hopped into the SDP last year.

In case all of Falae’s lies fail, as we pray, and Bourdillion also flops, here’s the trump card: the Agbekoyas. Not the earthbound green fingers you think you know.

Oh, yeah!

Not funny.

What matters is the end—that this very senior citizen doesn’t get really bleeped up because he got a freebie.

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