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Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? - Family - Nairaland

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Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by ruskiee(m): 5:48pm On Dec 29, 2009
I see an older aunt who separated from her husband years ago.
I see few of my friends' mothers divorced from their husbands a long time ago.
I see few newlyweds regretting their decisions by going back to court to get a divorce.
I see a lot of single parents out there.

Sometimes i wonder if they feel pain,or just triumph in their lives. And what about the kids involved.
Everyone longs for a good relationship with their parents-what happens if one of them leaves? Can a single parent bring up a child well and how will that child turn out in the end?

There are a lot of lonely mothers (and fathers) out there. A lot!
So before going into marriage-think people. It's more than just wedding rings and vows. It's much deeper than that.
Sometimes i wonder if marriage is overrated.  undecided
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by ruskiee(m): 6:06pm On Dec 29, 2009
So anyone else think marriage is overrated?
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by Nobody: 6:48pm On Dec 29, 2009
I think some think its a fairytale where they fall in love, get married and they live happily ever after THE END.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by platinumnk(f): 7:02pm On Dec 29, 2009
its overated cool
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by mamagee3(f): 7:24pm On Dec 29, 2009
It's way Overrated almost a tradition! cool
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by LordReed(m): 7:57pm On Dec 29, 2009
People crash n die in cars.
People get scammed on the internet.
People get blown out of the sky by terrorists.
People die during surgeries.

Yeah technology is overated (cos we kill ourselves with it) so maybe we should just stop using technology huh?

Despair about how things turn out solves no problems.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by mamagee3(f): 7:59pm On Dec 29, 2009
What does Car Crash, Medical deaths, terrorists attacks got to do with "Marriage"?
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by LordReed(m): 8:27pm On Dec 29, 2009
Illustration honey. If we are to leave alone all the things that hurt people where would we be?
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by Akebulan: 8:39pm On Dec 29, 2009
I am certain that it is. I too, have seen way too many people who got married and left (dvorced) because they realized that it isnt what they expected it to be. I think weddings are beautiful and receptions are grand but staying married is the price you have to pay for those two occasions and most people, arent prepared to stay married; only to get married.
I do believe however, that marriage does work for some (very few) people and when it does, it can be so beautiful. Love, regardless if its adorned with marriage or not, is beautiful.



ruskiee:

I see an older aunt who separated from her husband years ago.
I see few of my friends' mothers divorced from their husbands a long time ago.
I see few newlyweds regretting their decisions by going back to court to get a divorce.
I see a lot of single parents out there.

Sometimes i wonder if they feel pain,or just triumph in their lives. And what about the kids involved.
Everyone longs for a good relationship with their parents-what happens if one of them leaves? Can a single parent bring up a child well and how will that child turn out in the end?

There are a lot of lonely mothers (and fathers) out there. A lot!
So before going into marriage-think people. It's more than just wedding rings and vows. It's much deeper than that.
Sometimes i wonder if marriage is overrated.  undecided


Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by HIO4: 8:42pm On Dec 29, 2009
You should blame that on poor planning.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by LordReed(m): 8:47pm On Dec 29, 2009
Lets get the terms clear. Wedding is different from Marriage. A wedding is like the gateway for entering into a marriage. To confuse the desire to experience a wedding with the desire for marriage is just dat CONFUSION. Doesn't make marriage overrated. Weddings maybe but marriage no.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by ruskiee(m): 9:07am On Dec 30, 2009
Thanks for the comments guys.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by iice(f): 6:38pm On Dec 30, 2009
Hah! I'm not alone. They looked at me as if i was cuckoo for thinking that back in high school cheesy
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by Fhemmmy: 6:40pm On Dec 30, 2009
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss and more Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Seems like we living a dream of others.
We seems to be making others happy while we ache within.

1 Like

Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by sweetpie23: 6:42pm On Dec 30, 2009
I don't think so. My parents  marriage is a good one and all my life I can tell they loved each other. am already engage and living with my fiance, living with him has been great and I can't wait to get married and start a family. The example that my parents set for me was a good one, so I hope to have the same.

1 Like

Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by tunnytox(m): 6:54pm On Dec 30, 2009
marriage is overated so also is love cool
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by youngbest(m): 6:59pm On Dec 30, 2009
many ppl jump into marriage cauuse of wat
dey read in novels and see in films
so in real life wen d going gets tough dey cant keep up
cause it turns out 2 b wat dey tot
dats wat mks must marriage break
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by yeswecan(m): 7:04pm On Dec 30, 2009
I don't think marriage is overrated in anyway . . I MEAN it has been a part humanity from inception of time.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by Fhemmmy: 7:33pm On Dec 30, 2009
yeswecan:

I don't think marriage is overrated in anyway . . I MEAN it has been a part humanity from inception of time.

But u will agree that it is no more how it was meant to me, and how it was in the beginning
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by abhosts(m): 7:36pm On Dec 30, 2009
Marriage is not overrated. Most people simply marry for the wrong reasons and motives hence ending up in failed marriages.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by N101: 7:43pm On Dec 30, 2009
Marriage isn't overrated, people's expectations are unrealistic.

Why is it that some of our parents have gone the distance but we wilt at the slightest difficulty?

youngbest:

many ppl jump into marriage cauuse of wat
dey read in novels and see in films
so in real life wen d going gets tough dey cant keep up
cause it turns out 2 b wat dey tot
dats wat mks must marriage break
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by paddylo1(m): 7:47pm On Dec 30, 2009
yes. . . .
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by kcjazz(m): 7:49pm On Dec 30, 2009
Marriage is not overrated, anyone who thinks so just happen to be listening to the wrong person


So what is the alternative? Live with a partner or exchange partners? That too does not guarantee peace and success
However I think its not for everyone
With cultural change and technology things that seem easy before are now difficult

If you ask me I think Marriage is a lot of work; so if you cant stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by harakiri(m): 8:00pm On Dec 30, 2009
It depends on what you think marriage is.If you think marriage is what you see in the novels or romantic flicks, then you are in for a shocker (females are very susceptible to this fantasy island phenomenon).Also, this thing called "love" has different meanings for different people.To some, it's what they see on TV where a guy is willing to take a bullet his lady, he survives the deadly attack and he carries her off to paradise where they live till Armageddon.If you believe this, then you are in for a shocker.Love to me is about finding a woman you are attracted to, someone that can co-exist with you (very important) and someone who gets at least 70% on your score card.Hollywood love is a fantasy.If you doubt me, ask tiger woods or Britney spears.What i do believe is at some point in a man/woman's life, you decide to move to the next level and complete your cycle as a human being (having kids and grooming them).When you prepare your mind for the unexpected when going into marriage, you will have a "happy" life.

Bottom line :

Be Prepared for anything e.g getting divorced in two years with your "wife" taking everything you worked hard for all your life including house,car,retirement benefits,child support and all what not.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by Theblessed(f): 8:13pm On Dec 30, 2009
[b]Over-rated?  Only in Nigeria that marriage is being over-rated and certainly not over-rated for the Nigerian man rather, for their women.  Nigerian women are made to feel a 'Failure' if they hadn't got a man by their 30th birthday and that's what feeds the culture.  Women are put under immense pressure to marry any thing that has two legs and a 'bell' between their legs.  It doesn't matter whether he could perform as a husband or not.  

The Nigerian woman's welfare in  marriage is not even considered let alone the children that would crop up in the marriage - what matters is marry him God will kawo kwudi and am asking, really  Well, we have seen how much that had happened in many marriages in Nigeria, haven't we. Women are pushed into marriage just to please families without any thought about their welfare as the issues of poverty, starvation, education, jobs, skills and financial stability for the Nigerian women in marriage is not even considered before arranging these silly marriages.

My advise is, ladies don't do it unless you are sure you want to do it and are prepared to face the realities of marrying into poverty and hopelessness otherwise, pack your bag and seek your future elsewhere. This family that never considered your future and welfare in a silly marriage does not worth bothering about - they are not much of a family in my view. To avoid such a thing we therefore, must think about these issues and the welfare of our daughters in marriage before piling the pressure that leads into silly marriages that are going no where thus, the  over-rated culture of stupid marriages in our society.
[/b]
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by ElRazur: 8:28pm On Dec 30, 2009
Marriage is over-rated. It is nothing but a piece of paper forced upon us by society. The fact of the matter is that, some of us really do not need this piece of paper to function well in society.smiley
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by bidemi12(m): 8:39pm On Dec 30, 2009
Overated ke!!! I have been married since i was 27 and 10 years on, it is the best decision i ever made (aside the decision to get the hell out of Naija). The thought of coming home every night to someone soft and cuddly? the thought of you always having a number 6 anytime and anywhere? absolutely wonderful. grin

1 Like

Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by dumodust(m): 8:42pm On Dec 30, 2009
marriage is definitely over-rated!!
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by tomiwa17(m): 8:45pm On Dec 30, 2009
marriage is a divine institution God has a divine partner for everybody and as long as u marry d wrong person it will be a constant battle to make it work it is those who cant keep up with d struggle dat get divorced so unless God directs u to ur divine partner it will neva work. Period!
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by ElRazur: 8:46pm On Dec 30, 2009
bidemi12:

Overated ke!!! I have been married since i was 27 and 10 years on, it is the best decision i ever made (aside the decision to get the hell out of Naija). The thought of coming home every night to someone soft and cuddly? the thought of you always having a number 6 anytime and anywhere? absolutely wonderful. grin

I get all of those plus more without the need to marry. Oh on top of that, I can change and swap as I want. . . , Man, you gotta love the life of non-tied down unmarried man
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by bidemi12(m): 8:50pm On Dec 30, 2009
ElRazur:

I get all of those plus more without the need to marry. Oh on top of that, I can change and swap as I want. . . , Man, you gotta love the life of non-tied down unmarried man

Hmmmmm, (shakes head and sympathizes). O ma se ooo.
Re: Do you ever think Marriage Is Overrated? by r231(m): 8:52pm On Dec 30, 2009
No. marriage is what two people make it. if both partners are not willing to share the good times and the bad times together, the marriage will not last. marriage is not a 50-50 situation. someone has to be the leader. a 60-40 compromise has worked for my fiance and i. we compromise on everyday decisions, and team together on emergencies.

Marriage is a team effort. you have to work at making a marriage work. its a second job. love and respect are the main ingredients that holds a marriage together. lose one or the other and the marriage will suffer.

Marriage is not overrated.

Its what two people make of it. if the marriage fails, its the fault of the relationship.

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