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I'll like to know the inspiration behind this stupid question

dnoable08:
I'll like to know the inspiration behind this stupid question

One of my parents died recently.

And a few people told me it is harder to lose mother than father.

R.I.P to your mum

brightfuture17:


One of my parents died recently.

And a few people told me it is harder to lose mother than father.

My condolences, but it is not something to debate on

this is a dumb question.

I'll like to know the inspiration behind this stupid question

and she replied

OP Acpt my condo...

Now to your quest. Pls disregard those dumbass who think your quest is dumb.


Missing any loved one is a hard choice which is out of our control in life.

Father and Mother are as equally important as life is to you.


Mothers:

1. They are More aware of the of the family politics at grass root and most often, those who stay with their children till adulthood sacrifice alot for them and know how to keep them united for their success after the death of the Father.


2. Society usually frowns at the mother who may try to remarry. Even if she tries that, it must be when the children have been totally able to stand on their own...

So, Mothers hardly remarries


3. Society sees a widow who remains a widow for life as a good and loyal strong woman to her dead husband if she refuses to remarry.



Father:

The father who most times plays neutral in grass root family politics often because of more complex busy days fending for their up keeps is usually not able to preach and uphold unity of the family after a woman dies because of societal pressure, Thereby his children who were not able to break through in life before the death of their mother usually find it difficult to breakthrough in life resulting in some keeping an eye on inheritance which most times becomes deadly.

And a girl child may miss her steps in life (unwanted pregnancy) while trying to find peace outside the home which has sudenly become a battle ground.

While the boys may become full bad gang members while seeking for solutions outside...



2. When the woman dies, it most times lead to internal conflicts of intrest and automatic broken home, especially for the non polygamous marriage.

This is because soon as the woman is dead the society starts laying pressure for the man to remarry with some even been pressured to remarry in a space of less than two weeks to months after the death of his wife.


3. The children who may have not made their breakthrough in life find it difficult because of daddy 's divided attention. The male children automatically becames daddy's worst enemy or arch rival.

At this stage of life, you may need a senior member of the family who dad respects to call him to orders.

Dad may even go ahead to marry his children age mate (eg. Mr. OJUK) . And you cant say jack hoot about it. Children will be treated like ShIt by new mom and dad becomes absolute zombi etc... Cant explain all


OP there are somany Diffrent family cases ive seen like this.

When mom dies, the children have to come back home to take that dangerous battle positions their mom useto occupy for them which now becomes difficult to sustain.

Its a crazy world down there!
So,

1. Since mom is dead, and if its was not a polygamous marriage
(because if it was, other wives would stand for you, infact you may not feel pain missing mom)
and children still depend on daddy, then be prepared to hold dad tight and make sure he signs to continue to sponsor the education or whatever, of his children till they are able to stand on their own before thinking of another wife....

Wish you the best of your journey to breakthrough.

OP Hustle hard, Hustle really harder, I say tripple your hustle till the hardest! Make your money and enjoy life. Success has many rela(thives) and friends.




MISSING YOUR MOM IS MORE PAINFUL & DIFICULT THAN MiSSING DAD.



Goodluck


NOW AWAY FROM THE MATTER

from next year I WILL STOP Paying Nigerian Tax till abok! Is forced to

1. start using Casket for their dead loved ones

2. Hisbah stops destroying beers up north.

3. more to

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

I'm really sorry to hear the loss.
Do you mind to share with us what stoped her life?

Now, You need to map out a strong plan for the Children, (Insurance...) They've got real long way to go and need you keep sharp good eye on them.

Wish You all the Best.

I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

Sorry for your loss, please take heart. It seems she died from childbirth complications.
But if you musa remarry, please and please always keep an eye on your kids to make sure they are not maltreated by your new wife. That trend of maltreatment after remarriage is very common in homes where stepmothers are the ones raising kids and the trauma it causes for the innocent children is deep and long lasting.

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

I am so sorry, was she ill?

brightfuture17:


I am so sorry, was she ill?

Thank you. She wasn't really I'll. She died of Embolism (something that has to do with a blocked pulmonary artery by blood clot), you can google that.

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

I'm so sorry about your wife....please do well to take good care of your children, channel all into loving them and caring for them... they are still quite young.. Do not give in to societal pressure to remarry any time soon, in as much as those kids need a motherly figure in their lives, thread very carefully....few women will genuinely accept and take good care of those kids like their mum will, very few.
In case of your hormones raging very soon, do not share those kids attention, they are still quite young and fragile....it ain't an easy route but I pray God helps and strengthen you

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

I am sorry about your loss. I can't claim to relate to your pains and challenges, I can only wish you strength to carry on.

Get lots of support from your female family members...mum, sisters and aunties. If you don't feel comfortable releasing the kids to anyone, please don't. Be the best dad you can be for your kids.

RIP to your wife.
Lord give you the strength to carry on.

iamphill:
I can relate to your question to an extent. I just lost my wife and i have a son of about 3years and a daughter of about 2months and some weeks. Funny enough today makes it 2months she died.
Sometimes i feel helpless and confused thinking about the future of the kids and many issues am facing from my inlaws (it was an intertribal union) .
Guess i can learn one or two things from this thread.

Take heart OP. Am sure your deceased parent is in a better place. God be with ua all.

Very terrible loss. I pray God comforts you and bless your children. I know it is too early to think about another person but when the time comes, God will give you a good wife and mother for your children. This too shall pass.

OP it depends on who you are closest to. You will definitely feel the loss and sadness for both of them but you will know who you feel it for more.

When i heard my dad died, i cried a bit but was really sad. When he was being lowered into the ground, i didnt cry but i felt that loss of a dad. When i heard my mum died, i cried all the way to d hospital. When she was being lowered, i cried too. I think of her more and sometimes my husband would catch me crying because i miss her and the part she would have played in my life.
It just depends on who is closer to you.

Lalasticlala keep off this thread! Not for dead snakes.



Now
my
people,
lets
show
some
respect
to
the
dead.


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iamphill:


Thank you. She wasn't really I'll. She died of Embolism (something that has to do with a blocked pulmonary artery by blood clot), you can google that.

It is a shame.

How are you coping?

I am coping but its not the best of times. But God knows better why.