Yes, I was born last to an already existing family of five, you know what that means right? yes, I had a pass to almost everything, I could mess up the house and still be called "cute" by mom, aferall, I was her darling darling pet. I was raised with an infinite amount of toys and no one dares make me cry. i was the born king. aren't those the perks of being a lastborn? right? right?. NO.
Rather than a king, the last born is more of a slave to the house, the palace's own clown, ever failing and ever dissapointing. As soon as you're born you have standards to meet, records to beat and of course, if you're yoruba, pepper to grind. you're forced to walk in everybody's shoes, God help you, you fail, a series of unfortunate events-the movie, would be a sweeter approach to life. And in failing, I marveled. I was rude, lazy and dirty, I was everything brothers were not, and I was never made to forget.
You see on the issue of respect, getting respect is as good as fishing in a desert, you'd assume as you grew older things would change, but not quite so they didnt. sometimes it might seem little, relatively at least, like everyone who comes around never fails to make jokes about you being mum's boyfriend, and how you suckle on mother's natural nourishers (if only they had the sense to be this mild in speech), without ceasing to add my born nickname-omo mummy. And I'm more than baffled on how they could make such grotesque jokes whilst still pointing out its grotesqueness as they laugh, snorting like pigs which they are.
But it gets really sore, especially when it comes from your parents, things should have changed, at least they did for my brothers as they graced in age. Dad and I's relationship was much like oil and water from the onset, although I fully acknowledge his authority over me, but, as a boy shapes into a man, he should be accorded some level of respect don't you think? he never stops talking to me like a five-year-old. picture this, 19 year old me, a grown man if i must add, forgeting to unlock the gates, and papi yelling, repeatedly, in front of the tenants and the tenants' kids, loud enough for the neighbours and the neighbours' kids to be audiences, "stupid". you can as well refer to that as my middle name, surely I have been called so more than my ceremonial names.
I'll be right back.

Privacy, privacy, privacy. would you like some privacy? a little confidentiality? nope, you know you aren't eligible for that service, you are not a highborn, you are a lastborn. this one "perk" is most intriguing, as you know,due to our status, we are an open book, everyones's viewing screen, from your last withdrawal to your first thousand spent, your results, your debit card infos, the friends you keep... basically everything, everyone knows, and they most definitely have a say in it. And every "big" step you plan on taking calls for a family meeting. look on the bright side, a biography of you would be precise, yet, concise, marked by your unnotable life.
So how's your relationship with your elder siblings? asides them being your benchmark. well, it's not rosy either, they hand you cash even though they know you have enough, fight for you and all, but all these, seemingly. To them, you are an asset, and those nice things done are just mere investments. So they can order you to get their phones in their room, clean their room, have a say in your life, and end with the suffix "sir" when talking to them. This is typical of the firstborn, in a bid to keep the hierachy steady, demands respect higher than that of Dad's. There's no convos between both of you because you are "not mates", and all our dealings shall be no different than a general's to a private. but the middleborns are quite different, they are friendlier, but not so much open. for example, they might be discussing personal issues and you walk in and there comes the awkward silence. and in the end, all you really know about your brothers is not other than "those you should respect". But you are an open book, even if you choose not to be.
I do create excuses for them, thats how i have managed this far. I thought it to be some sort of coping mechanism for the actions of my parent, maybe they can't face the fact all their kids are grown. and that I have nothing in common with my brothers, not that they really want to relegate me. But do they really create excuses for me? ever see a reason to my outbursts? other than the fact that i am just a whiny little boy.
Sadly, this never ends. you get married and your wife is tied in to this world of service, your kids are not left out either. Really, it's no fun being the lastborn.

Sorry.

My Father was Last. The Uncle's want a Last Nephew.



Thunder fire all of them!

Lalasticlala

Hmm another thing l have observed about lastborn is that your opinion doesn't rarely count

You will always be look down upon.

But there is something laatborns don't understand, they want life to be smooth for them without much struggle as if life is a bed of roses,mstchwwwwwwww.

One advice one will giveuna way be last born(aka smally) eh be say respect and follow your elder siblings when de are doing things. That way your life go de sweet small small

ifyan:
Hmm another thing l have observed about lastborn is that your opinion doesn't rarely count

You will always be look down upon.

But there is something laatborns don't understand, they want life to be smooth for them without much struggle as if life is a bed of roses,mstchwwwwwwww.

One advice one will giveuna way be last born(aka smally) eh be say respect and follow your elder siblings when de are doing things. That way your life go de sweet small small

Do you really think so? What about being the only child? That's more or less like being a lastborn. So they have no chance of succeeding? That's the point of all this epistle, our life is not dependent on yours.

TarOrfeek:
My Father was Last. The Uncle's want a Last Nephew.



Thunder fire all of them!

Can you explain more please?

Nutase:
Sorry.

You need not be. But you can help change things

Khafsun:

You need not be. But you can help change things

how?

Your siblings will always assume that you, your family and whatever has your blood will be last. Subservient and in extreme dependence for their resources.


But God forbid that!

TarOrfeek:
Your siblings will always assume that you, your family and whatever has your blood will be last. Subservient and in extreme dependence for their resources.


But God forbid that!

Yes,. God forbid that

I have my heavy dose of last born treatment too!
It's even way more hard on you if you are male(female last born had it more easier for them. l only pity their hubby though).
In summary, being a last born is more like lacking a mind of your own so everyone had to decide what they think is best for you!

Well I'm a last born and I'm afraid all your assertions are not entirely true.

I'm always marveled especially, during family meetings, how they always seek for my opinion and the kind of attention they pay to it.

Eldest is in late 40s and I'm barely 27, yet he sees me as a professional in my career as I handle every of his construction projects and he respects me and my decisions. And can not make any move without seeking for my opinion.

You can only earn their respect and trust. I worked hard to earn mine

Like the previous comment, The only way things can change is to be successful in life, Extremely successful and independent so no one can talk to you anyhow or feel like you own them. It takes time but it's achievable.

Emmenyk:
Well I'm a last born and I'm afraid all your assertions are not entirely true.

I'm always marveled especially, during family meetings, how they always seek for my opinion and the kind of attention they pay to it.

Eldest is in late 40s and I'm barely 27, yet he sees me as a professional in my career as I handle every of his construction projects and he respects me and my decisions. And can not make any move without seeking for my opinion.

You can only earn their respect and trust. I worked hard to earn mine

what the op said is true. Respect comes when you start earning. My respect started ending of last year when things changed for me. Now i am part of the main key decisions in the house

Every home is different
Am not a last born but trust me
My last born makes sure his heard
you have to earn your respect

Na so life dey.

Idrismusty97:
Like the previous comment, The only way things can change is to be successful in life, Extremely successful and independent so no can talk to you anyhow or feel like you own them. It takes time but it's achievable.

Gbam! Gbamer!! Gbamest!!!

I'm the last born and only female, automatically the deputy mummy. My own brothers treats me like a baby, lol it can be annoying ehn .Monitoring spirits . But if I don't cook no food that day.And sometimes they come to me for advice.

I relate too much to this

The OP is very correct, people assume all is well with u, they assume that u don't lack anything because ur people provide for u, and u don't even live a life of ur own ...Most last borns are like Soldiers, we keep obeying orders.

I am The last born and honestly if I had the power I would have changed that! We are two girls and four guys I was soo attached to my sister that when she got into into the university It was as of my world came crumbling as I was still in SS1, and the load of house was a bit of a mess chores fell on me,! I finished secondary school and didn't get into the university until 3 years later! And when I did it was in lagos cos my mum didn't want me to go far(she wanted me to be near so I can help care for my sick dad) didn't realise that on time though! All these has affected me cos I do not know what most girls know in terms of exposure cos I went to school from home, (it's affecting my marriage now too) and I use to have a lot of issues with my parents cos I was saddled with most of the responsibilities at home since my 2 elder brother never helped out cos of the belief that only a woman should work at home! Bern a lady born isn't entirely rosy

ifyan:
Hmm another thing l have observed about lastborn is that your opinion doesn't rarely count

You will always be look down upon.

But there is something laatborns don't understand, they want life to be smooth for them without much struggle as if life is a bed of roses,mstchwwwwwwww.

One advice one will giveuna way be last born(aka smally) eh be say respect and follow your elder siblings when de are doing things. That way your life go de sweet small small

That bold phrase is what I'm dealing with presently, my opinion just doesn't count. I wan marry, E never reach time! I wan do dis, not yet boy listen to your elders. I think it should be this way, what think? What are you thinking, you are still a child and your thinkin is not relevant yet!!!!!!! Sometimes as the last born you feel like doing the prodigal son thing, but no matter how right you are na you go beg last last.
I don tire jere abeg make I mama born one more for her old age jere!

The write up is true tho....It is now that am a grown up enjoying my last born position

There're no perks to being the lastborn.

I'm not the last born but I'm the only male child and i only have one junior...boy am i glad she came along..... Even with me not being the last, my mum never failed to remind me when i mdee the slightest mistake how it was much easier raising the girls, how they've all gone on to be something in life...All that ended when i started working to earn own money sha..

I can totally relate to this just what am esperiencing now my opinion doesn't count to be last born no be easy our first born won take me form hierarchy as I started staying with him even b4 he got married and after marriage I do d house chores for him and his wife as I use to do Wen it was only 2 of us but now wey I Don graduate uni I torn prodigal son I still help Wen I can me I no dey take none sense again from na so so report give mumsi and my other siblings the funniest part my immediate brother came around last week he reported as usual he was now advicing me to be a good boy because am d Youngst in the house so am supposed to do the house chores I said OK me wey I know d tin wey I won do who dem won torn house boy

I can relate. lastborns we do don't demand much all we want is just some form of respect and independence shikenan.

HelenBee:
I'm the last born and only female, automatically the deputy mummy. My own brothers treats me like a baby, lol it can be annoying ehn .Monitoring spirits . But if I don't cook no food that day.And sometimes they come to me for advice.

Smallie Baby of the House.

raphafire:
The OP is very correct, people assume all is well with u, they assume that u don't lack anything because ur people provide for u, and u don't even live a life of ur own ...Most last borns are like Soldiers, we keep obeying orders.

Exactly
Though I do relate with my siblings unlike the OP's case
And when you decide not to obey their orders they crowned you stubborn. It's so annoying everyone wants to have a say in decisions pertaining your life. They keep on seeing you as a kid. That's why I am trying to become independent so that I will be as free as a bird