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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Soup Cooked By Me. (852 Views)
Food Cooked In Friendship / The Past In The Soup Pot (part 1) (2) (3) (4)
Soup Cooked By Me. by Nobody: 3:44pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
SOUP COOKED BY ME Episode 1 Ah this heat no go kill person ,, na wetin self ?, choi this kano weather don tire me beta make i run go my village Ka Chineke mere anyi Ebere . After seven chai i don almost late for work , wetin man pikin go chop today self?.. Ehm akpu yes akpu and vegetable soup , that type i see wey mama Rachy dey cook last night . but how i wan take prepare am when i no sabi cook soup ? I go try sha but first of all make i reach work first . Mrs Famous : ehm come back here , where do you thinks you are sneaking to ? Me : sorry sir. Mrs Famous: what’s sorry ? I just asked you a simple question, and you are telling me sorry sir . okay now what did you do? Me: sir is not my fault . Mrs Famous : it seems you dont understand english language anymore . Okay why are you late ?. Me: sir my uncle wife give birth to set of twins Mr Famous: And you went there to bath the babies abi ? Me : Ehm Mr Famous : 0 pls save me those lies of yours, justThank your God there’s no much work today ,, you would have worked over time. Thankyou sir i said smilling and walking to my table . no work today my own don beta i said to myself and loged in my whatsapp to reply all my chats , and when done i checked facebook to see if i was having any notification and reply them all. I went out to the nearest mama put where i work and ordered akpu and vegetable soup , which was later dished out on my table . i washed my hands and ponce on the food and begin eating it with passion which attracted people to look at me in an awkard manner . Tbc… 1 Like |
Re: Soup Cooked By Me. by Nobody: 5:17pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Lemme book space first 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Soup Cooked By Me. by Nobody: 7:34pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
*Soup cooked by me* Episode 2 Customer customer this one wey you dey eat swallow today hmmm you dey plan marry ?. Madam how much be your money (in a jim ike voice) ??. #500 she replied, i payed her and left angrily so she and other customers will contiue their gossip. Oho see food wey hungry me wey i for settle down eat with rest of mind naiem all this bad belle people come put thier winch eyes for my food , sha God pass dem. I went back to my office to relax since there is no much work to do, i haven even stayed up to (30) thirty minutes my stomach began doing me shaku shaku as i was feeling like to pour on my trousers but quickly located the rest room (comfort zone). God go punish dis woman i swear see as she begin make me dey podge with her yeye food wey she dey sell , i was busy insulting her in my mind . i was done excreting so i got up to clean myself up , when another s--t hook me with full velocity . which kind problem be this na ?, on how i dey leave here now, i go go para for this woman for the nonsense she sell give me in the name of food. I cleaned up myself and went back to the woman to complain about her food and how it disgraced me . she apologised and the case was closed. I returned to my office pick my phone and reach out to my best buddy (Major) who pick up immediately. *On phone*. ——–+-+——– Me: Abobi wxup Major: o boi i mount o , where you dey like this?. Me ; i position for work o . How the day dey be. Major; Aswear the day no favour me, me just dey rubbers lowkey and that my big head senior sis don go play her runs till evening before she return , me just dey vex here. Me: Choi my man nothing spoil , rubbers go still enter the town . but wait o you no go work ?. Major : which kind question you dey ask me na ?, now na holiday na we wey be teachers no dey go school. Me : forgive me , now i remember . Major: idoit how you no go forget wen e be say na dat your lady posh thinking full your head. Me: choi no near there o me no dey use her joke o. Major: ok i don hear , so wetin dey sup. Me: oboy you know say me don leave mama’s house to follow bachelor way . Major : ehm yes i know wetin happen ?. . . . Tbc |
Re: Soup Cooked By Me. by Nobody: 2:00pm On Apr 30, 2018 |
*Soup Cooked By Me* Episode 3 Me: omen i no lie you na soup dey hungry me o ,, and i no get babe wey fit carryout that assignment . Major : hahahaha abobi no kill me with laugh jur. you, you wey i know too well naiem wan flex soup ?. O now i understand , our science soup abi ?, no worries i go help organise that one. Me: Abobi press na no be that kind soup i dey mean , i mean soup with meat, fish and gbogbo-tigbo inside am. Major: This one serious o ,, you sure say na you wan flex am abi you get visitor wey go come ?. Me: Abobi die those matters na, which one you come dey charge me plenty checkmatings na ?, or na because i call you abi . Major: oya ma man cool no vex me just dey surprise na ,, you know say i no fit remember the year make you lay hands on swallows that’s why i dey wonder . Me: as i don come change now you no dey happy . Major: i happy for you die . Me: lol beta stay alive so i go see person wey go help me cook am den you fit die. Major: yeye but me self no sabi cook o . Me: choi i beta pass you at least i sabi boil yam , egg ,water and rice. Major: me self for sabi all those ones if i wan sabi na. Me: That one na by the bush , me go transfer small rubbers to you wey you go take flex and also get all the ingredient for the soup . Major: ok na i position dey wait for the tin tin for my phone. Me: no shaking make i check my lady posh to see if she dey online . Major : oyana watch your back. I ended the call with my useless but useful street padi to login to whatsapp to see if lady posh is online to scope her for the soup stuff. . . . Tbc….. |
Re: Soup Cooked By Me. by SapphireSultana(f): 9:51pm On Jun 16, 2018 |
Nice one.............
Update please. |
(1) (Reply)
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