SalamRushdie:
There is nothing better for a man than paying your parents back ...in the wise world we call those moment .

Ezkid:
I'm seriously considering this. I've moved out once but[b] I was just plain stupid[/b] to come back!

Ezkid:
I'm seriously considering this. I've moved out once but [b]I was just plain stupid [/b]to come back!

Ishilove:
Eleyi gidi gan o

Whenever I go to work, I'll come back to meet my mom waiting for me at the balcony with a story of how she's been praying for someone to buy her favorite dish for her since morning

Ezkid:
Hello house, though some people have accused me of being an ungrateful child by calling out my mother's unbecoming attitude, I wish to state categorically that I do not belong in the group of people that can be tagged as such. But the burdens that rested on my shoulders is very much for a young guy like me and it has taken its toll on my mental and physical health.

I'm a guy that work 6 to 7 hours everyday and I make little amount I can consider enough to sustain the life someone like me should be living as a young simple guy, but because I've made a terrible mistake of relocating from where I was living alone to live with my family, now it has become obvious that my family have considered me as their sole savior and the first button to press whenever they're in need, they've lost total faith in my father and theyve stop disturbing him like before.

Like I told u guys before, Mum is no longer working since she became born again and Dad is out of town, he only come around whenever he got the alerts, but before my relocation he used to send some tokens even before the end of the month, now it seems to me my Dad have capitalized on the fact that I'm working, and I should be responsible for the whole family's upkeep until his arrival
Jeez! Since I got to this house I've not being able to save a penny, my expenses is twice as much as my earnings. Whenever I go to work, I'll come back to meet my mom waiting for me at the balcony with a story of how she's been praying for someone to buy her favorite dish for her since morning, the funniest thing is no one has ever asked me for one naira since I got there but there's a way they'll start talking about food, money and other things that ll make me dip my hand in my pocket and hand over what I have, also there's these old look on everyone's face whenever they need something from me which will make me to give them what they want without being asked.

I've practically become a slave to them, always waiting for me to come before they'll start talking about what to cook and eat, right now I'm at the edge, I just want out immediately! All my earnings are being used on food for the whole family, every time I give them money I always refuse to eat out of what they cook thinking they'll get the message but its always the same, I always pity my younger ones cos they've got a real battle ahead of the.

Pls house should I leave or remain with them for the time being? Right now I'm thinking of running away from them.

bejeria101:


This one is strong!

ReinaFarine:
Hmmmm.... I can only comment based on your post here.

Please move out of the house. Not only because your parents are 'burdening' you with financial responsibilities that's crushing you, but because you're an adult. Living with your parents keeps you in a cocoon like state. You're not as independent as you should be. You are not learning what it means to handle some things as an adult living on his own. You cannot be as hardworking as your mate because you live in your family house. So, save enough, get and apartment first. It is going to toughen you up. And from your post, you need some toughening.

Secondly, although it is the African (Nigerian) Culture for a child to take care of his parents in appreciation to them for taking care of him, don't do it to your detriment. Calculate your salary. Maybe you can say:
20% for transport, airtime/data and other day to day expenses you incur...

30% to your parents which includes food, utility bills and etcetera...

40% for savings towards your rent...

10% as emergency fund... Sickness, contribution for some unprecedented situation.

(If you're religious you can make it 15% out of the rent money for tithe and offerings)


After getting the apartment, make sure you set aside at least 20% towards investment in your own dream. After working 6-7 hours, you can't just sleep and chat for the rest of the day. Start creating your legacy. You don't want to 'burden' your kids too do you?

So, explain to mumsi in a calm respectful manner that things are getting a little tithe for you and you have a very very important project so... Your income is automatically deducted by say... 50%. Trust me, if you explain it patiently, she will understand. Don't sha tell her you're moving out yet.

Take care...


PS: you can also get a part time job to compensate...

Earthbound:
I would seem from the emotional state of your post that you already know the answer to your problems, you're just too afraid to admit it.


A lot of firstborns become the breadwinner in their family, it's nothing new. Move in with a flatmate to reduce rent expenses. That way, you get better privacy and respect. People tend to easily lose respect for who they see everyday or who is readily available all the time. Be a man now or you'll regret it later when your family hates the woman you marry claiming she's the one who took you away from them. Please act fast.


But, never neglect your duties to your family. Remember they're irreplaceable.