I met her one year ago on a trip to a different country. She was working at the airport in that country and she is also from the Democratic Republic of the Congo. We kept in touch. Then, she started to ask me to hook her up with a potential husband. I wasn’t able to come up with any suitable partner for her; nevertheless I told her I would keep my eyes open. She was a struggling woman but seemed to come from a good background.

Six months ago, we lost contact as she was no where to be found on the planet.  I sent her numerous emails but I got no reply of hers, I called her phone number and it was disconnected. My efforts to reach her yielded no result. Did something happen to her? I was extremely concerned and agitated.

Suddenly, one morning I wake up to find her email hanging in my mail box. Thanks God she was still alive. She sent me her new phone number in the email.

I called her. She was so glad to hear my voice, a long lost friend. We had a lot to catch up. I was very curious as to what happened to her. Why had she disappeared from the face of the earth?  She said a lot of things had happened. She said she went through so much. She didn’t elaborate but asked me to call back the next day for details.

I called her back the next day. She wasn’t able to give me straight answers. I could sense a lot of hesitation in her voice. Then, she took a stand and decided to break the news “I am three months pregnant”.

I was curious “Are you married?”
“No, I am not married yet,” she said.
“When are you planning to get married?” I asked again.
“I am not getting married,” she said.

She had been going out with this man off and on for 3 years. Now that she is pregnant by him, she told me she hates him with a passion for no reason. She said the man wants to marry her but she just can’t marry him. At the same time she is crying because she is going to have a child out of wedlock.

More disturbing is the fact that she described this man (her baby’s father) as a responsible man with a job and a house who treats her very nice and who can give her anything she wants. But just she doesn’t understand why she doesn’t want him anymore.

My question: Is it possible for a woman to hate her baby’s father during pregnancy to the point of not wanting to be with him?  She doesn’t want a child out of wedlock at the same time she doesn’t want to marry her baby’s father.

Can there be more to the story than my friend is telling me?

There is more to it than you know now. Just allow her to come out with more details. She may want you play a more insidous role in the whole thing but beware, find out more about her reasons. She sounds unstable to me.

I will allow the womenfolk to explain this. It is difficult to understand women sometimes.

the man has entered wahala.

she fell out of love for him or she was never that into him/not her kind of man

since you said the baby father is a nice man I have the feeling that she will yeild to the man in a short while
By the time he will start showing so much affection/attension towards her during her pregnancy period she might withdraw from you

Remember you and her are in a long distance relationship and don't be too enquisitive when communicating with her let her do the talking more
she will tell you what you want to hear with her mouth and do something else with her heart

rubi:

since you said the baby father is a nice man I have the feeling that she will yeild to the man in a short while
By the time he will start showing so much affection/attension towards her during her pregnancy period she might withdraw from you

Remember you and her are in a long distance relationship and don't be too enquisitive when communicating with her let her do the talking more
she will tell you what you want to hear with her mouth and do something else with her hear

Sorry, me and her are just friends, like brother and sister. We hooked up as friends just because we were both congolese from the same hometown in a foreign country.  We met at the airport where she worked.  I am married by the way. And, her dislike of the baby's father doesn't have anything to do with me.

Another disturbing fact is that  she is a struggling woman who is desperate for a man to support her, but she doesn't want her baby's father who is ready to support her.

I am curious to know if it is a normal occurence for a woman to dislike her baby's father during pregnancy. Or, as i have said earlier, there could be more to this story than she had told me.

TheCongo

the truth is this:
3 yrs ago both they met and became ?, thereafter they parted ways. it broke her heart and she resumed her search for a SUITABLE man. it did not come her way as expected, they re-united again and ?? she has little feelings for him now, but she is in a web already. perhaps the man has already married to another lady. your friend don't want to be a second wife, a mistake she just found out.
RIVAL is only REASON a woman may hate the man that gets her pregnant. simple

@Okenwa u Might be correct