Random Kicks From Egypt - Jokes Etc - Nairaland
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| Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 9:59pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
Well this na thread wey i go dey put random jokes, pics, videos, riddles, puzzles and many other things from time to time. Others are free to contribute. . . well make i kick the ball from eygpt on to nairaland.  Please off - topic chats are strictly forbidden so give comments only related to the thread direction please thanks.  |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 10:00pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
A young man and a young woman were soon to be married, but they both had a problem they had never told anyone else about. The man approached his father one day before the wedding and told him about his problem. His feet REALLY stunk, even if he washed them constantly, he was worried that this would scare off his new bride, so he needed a solution, fast. His father pondered the situation and finally told his son to wear socks constantly (even to bed) and always wash his feet whenever he got a chance. The son thought about this and went along happy. The same day the young lady approached her mother and told her about her problem. Her morning breath was horrid. Her mother reassured her and told her everyone had bad morning breath. The young woman told her mother that this was not normal morning breath but easily the worst in the world. The mother thinks about this and comes up with this bright idea. She tells her daughter to get up earlier than everyone else and don't say a thing, go make breakfast and then brush her teeth while the others are eating. The young woman thinks and then runs off to get ready for the wedding, happy. The couple is married and they are happy, him with his perpetual socks and her with her morning silences. One morning about 5:30 am the young man wakes up to find one sock missing. He starts rustling around in the bed looking for it, which of course wakes up his wife, who without thinking asks what's wrong. With a look of shock on his face the young man says, ''OH MY GOD! You've swallowed my sock!'' |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by EfemenaXY: 10:02pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
^^Crazy Joke!! But I like it!! Nice 1 Pharoh - pls post more of 'em . . .  |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 10:06pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
^^ Lol . . . good you like dem and cu.min 4rm my greatest critic. Well i will do my thing at my own pace sha . . just drop by every now and then. |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by EfemenaXY: 10:14pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
It's a really cool joke besides I always give credit - where credit's due |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by hectorswag(m): 10:23pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
dats d spirit  |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 10:56pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
One night, three guys are at a bar talking and they all think their wives are cheating on them. The first guy says he thinks his wife is screwing a plumber because he found a tool belt under his bed. They all agree, and the second guy tells his story. He says he thinks his wife is screwing a judge because he found a robe and gavel under his bed. They all agree, and then the third guy says, "That's nothing! My wife is the worst! I came home and found a cowboy under my bed. I can't believe she's screwing a horse." |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 10:58pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
Make i go relax for the night A guy walks into a bar, sits down and has a drink. Suddenly, a man hollers at him, ''I screwed your mom last night!'' Disturbed, the man tries to ignore him. Again, he hears, ''Your mom was good in bed last night!'' Again, he tries to ignore it. The man is just about to speak again but the guy stops him and says, ''Dad, go home, you're drunk!'' |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by bibs(f): 11:26pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
keep it up! |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by ednutey(f): 11:32pm On Sep 12, 2010 |
Really funny, thumbs up |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by babyme1(f): 9:10am On Sep 13, 2010 |
Pharoh: LMAO |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Ben13: 10:15am On Sep 13, 2010 |
Pharoh, you've been posting spams |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 12:14pm On Sep 13, 2010 |
U dey mind the yeye spam bot  |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by StudioCFR(m): 8:46am On Sep 14, 2010 |
Stop posting abeg - yo fear don dey catch me already. Stale jokes |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 6:00pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Studio CFR: Oya go pack well for corner because more dey come so. |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 6:02pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Labour Pains A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labour pain to the father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favour of it. The doctor set the pain transfer dial to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But as the labour progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic. When they got home, the mailman was lying dead on their porch. Money Talks! During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer: "Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out." He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied. On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?" The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal." The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer." Revelation 3:20 A new pastor moved into town and went out one Saturday to visit his parishioners. All went well until he came to one house. It was obvious that someone was home, but no one came to the door even after he had knocked several times. Finally, he took out his card and wrote on the back: Revelation 3:20 and stuck it in the door. The next day, as he was counting the offering he found his card in the collection plate. Below his message was the notation Genesis 3:10. Revelation 3:20 reads: "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will dine with him, and he with me." Genesis 3:10 reads: "And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was unclothed." |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by blacksta(m): 6:07pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Pharoh - wetin happened u opened a thread at least - or it has been a while u too want attention - lol |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 6:20pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Attention for waiting na . . check my jokes statistics ooo. You never hear of Resident Moderator before kwa? |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by StudioCFR(m): 7:06pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Give dat blackie cyber kick jor lol You try sha |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by Pharoh: 8:04pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
I t6ry sha . . na so dem dey pay homage to a royal king like me?  Shey your leg dey pain you lol? . . . abi na case of once beaten twice shy. |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by bibs(f): 8:32pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Good job. |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by StudioCFR(m): 8:40pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Bibs u still dey? @pharoh, i wan go insure my legs and eyebr'w tomorow. - wait when i come back u hear |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by bibs(f): 8:53pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Oga mi. i dey o. hope u good? |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by StudioCFR(m): 10:26pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Tehehe i'm good my dear - just dat since dis my rise to fame, i never rest lol I miss u sha |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by EfemenaXY: 10:34pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
@Stud - you ain't famous, so stop deceiving yourself @ Pharoh - nice collection of jokes but I've already seen most of them  |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by StudioCFR(m): 10:38pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Enemy of joy No ooffeince |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by blacksta(m): 10:40pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Studio CFR: no mind am - where as i have seen all of her jokes before |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by EfemenaXY: 10:43pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
Studio CFR: You mean Offence! - bush baby  blacksta: You never see shi-shi nor be efe introduce you to d jokes section?? |
| Re: Random Kicks From Egypt by blacksta(m): 10:44pm On Sep 14, 2010 |
oya take back your introduction |
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