Shut the Bleep up!!! Who told you Idoma men are lazy? Don't start spewing trash over what you know nothing about.

Graxie:
It's not Idoma thing, Most Idoma men are proud men, they hardly do house chores. In fact in Agatu, it's a taboo for a man to pound. Some of their men are usually lazy so this man is exceptional. It's possible he enjoys house chores while raising idiots. Go to markurdi, most of their women will be plaiting hair, selling all manner to feed okpani while he will be busy gisting. Your landlord is different but he also failed in raising sound kids.

What are you saying
[s]

Bluehill1051:
Why don't you help him sometimes?
In my own opinion, you're worse than those children. It is your type that will rather take photos of a dying person than actually saving them.

[/s]

IT CULD BE BCS THE DAD ISNT THE BREADWINNER AND HAS LOST THE ROLE OF BN THE HEAD OF THE FAMILY!TO BE CANDID WITH U,THERE SHULDNT BE ANY JUSTIFICATION FOR THIS!STAY SAFE!!

Micky002:
There is this scenerio i usually observe with my landlord and his children which always makes me curious and also raises unanswered question within me. This prompt me to post this here.

My landlord is idoma by tribe and has six grown up children, three boys and three girls. He should be in his late fifties or early sixties. Here is the issue.

This man despite having grown up boys and girls always do his chores by himself while the children will be lazying around engaging in trivial discussions. This man will wash his clothes by himself while his girls, the youngest being twenty years of age will be chatting with friends in the compound. This man will go to fetch water with kegs using a wheel barrow every morning while the boys will sit outside doing nothing.

Meanwhile the water he fetches is used by every member of the house. This man can go up to three to four trips while the boys will be busy arguing about Manchester United and Chelsea with friends.

What baffles me the most is that they see nothing wrong in this because the man doesn't complain and his wife, their mother is also witnessing everything.

My question now is, is this an acceptable norm in their (Idoma) culture? For a father to be doing the house chores while the children will be playing. I'm asking because where I come from, it is unacceptable.

yes it can be strange in some part of the country even in mine but i served in benue and i witnessed the backwardness in child upbringing and their way of life. though an average idoma would be hospitable to you but when it comes to behaviour, they are zero.

i have seen my landlord carry buckets himself and the children though young would not lift a finger to assist. children as young as 6 drinking beer.

they do have talls girls but i have never seen girls that are very sex active as them and can be very materistic


that land be as its be. if you observe very well, their young die fast. wo! make i go sleep

ZooOga:
how many fvckin mumus does it take to ask or tell op to mind his business?

did he say he approached the landlord or grown children and opened his mouth and protested? no, he's just made an observation about a dysfunctional custom and is sharing it with NL.

Jeez, some pple need to get a few minutes of sunshine/vitamin D.

He might have gossiped with one or two friends before bringing it here..for this thread alone and the time invested therein he has failed to mind his business because he has no right to do such... Don't you know you need someone's permission to advise or help them out... You should only be worried if there is a threat to your security ...

redsun:
Children don't always have to be their parents' slaves. In a normal world, there won't need to fetch water from outside and it is the adult's responsibilities to make sure the basics are in place.

However, if the children are adults, they should go and fend for themselves. But it is easier said than done in a society where nothing works. Someone needs to break the yoke of inherent backwardness.

Wow!! This thread is really a test of logic .. Alas many failed woefully courtesy of religion and emotions... Good one redsun

crackland:
And his wife, mother to the irresponsible children, is witnessing all of this and not saying anything.

If a woman does not have any regard for her husband, it will be foolhardy to expect the children to have any regard for their father.

The problem is almost certainly coming from his wife.

i wish i can like your comment hundred times. my thoughts exactly. lets even assume the children are even end time children, cant the wife help out? who we marry will either make or mar us.

All it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to watch and do nothing. What have u done or going to do about the situation? Family upbringing of his children might have failed him, but what role has the society played? Remember you are part of the society!

Like someone said, talk to the children gently....I'm sure there will be atleast one or two that will change. And change for good. Even you will be happy you turned things around for the man and the child/children. Heaven will reward you for your intervention.

starbuck:
He is reaping the fruits of his labor �‍♀️�‍♀️..

'Train a child in the way ohe/she would go, and when they are old, they won't depart from it'


I hope some of our digital Nairaland parents learn from this..

Sometimes when u speak to a child or correct him or her and they refuse to pay attention u just have to let them be ,,,,

Now for the man ,I believe he is paying for the mistake he made in his youthful age ,but wait o,he is a landlord ,he definitely has no mistake Bec he hustled to build that hux ooo

The kids will definitely pass Tru hell when the man dies

kalufelix:
Wow!! This thread is really a test of logic .. Alas many failed woefully courtesy of religion and emotions... Good one redsun

That's y I love foreign life ,18 years of age u parents can tell u ,young man is time u go stay on your own ,
Or else i will charge you rent for living with me,,,if u refuse to comply na police your parents fit call for u

Micky002:
There is this scenerio i usually observe with my landlord and his children which always makes me curious and also raises unanswered question within me. This prompt me to post this here.

My landlord is idoma by tribe and has six grown up children, three boys and three girls. He should be in his late fifties or early sixties. Here is the issue.

This man despite having grown up boys and girls always do his chores by himself while the children will be lazying around engaging in trivial discussions. This man will wash his clothes by himself while his girls, the youngest being twenty years of age will be chatting with friends in the compound. This man will go to fetch water with kegs using a wheel barrow every morning while the boys will sit outside doing nothing.

Meanwhile the water he fetches is used by every member of the house. This man can go up to three to four trips while the boys will be busy arguing about Manchester United and Chelsea with friends.

What baffles me the most is that they see nothing wrong in this because the man doesn't complain and his wife, their mother is also witnessing everything.

My question now is, is this an acceptable norm in their (Idoma) culture? For a father to be doing the house chores while the children will be playing. I'm asking because where I come from, it is unacceptable.

Simple!
Summon courage and ask the woman!
For surely she has lived long enough in the house to tell u wether or not she married him like that!!

starbuck:
He is reaping the fruits of his labor �‍♀️�‍♀️..

'Train a child in the way ohe/she would go, and when they are old, they won't depart from it'


I hope some of our digital Nairaland parents learn from this..

Objection please. How do you know he is reaping the fruit of his labour. These days: you train a child and he or she will complete the training. It only takes the grace of God for children now to grow with good behaviour.

I am sorry for the father.
I cannot sit doing nothing and my elder brother will be fetching water, unless we are fetching it together. Not to talk of my father ( Tufiakwa) .
The man may have been tired of talking to them about it. They may even pick quarrel with the father as some cock sucking children does.

If the least one is twenty plus, then I will not blame the parents. This are adults that should take responsibility of thier lives

Bluehill1051:
Why don't you help him sometimes?
In my own opinion, you're worse than those children. It is your type that will rather take photos of a dying person than actually saving them.

Really. You want the op to be fetching water for the entire household while the little children will be there gisting. I can only do that if the man is staying alone or staying with only the wife.

Those ones are bastards.

He didn't train them well, now he's paying for it

Bluehill1051:
Why don't you help him sometimes?
In my own opinion, you're worse than those children. It is your type that will rather take photos of a dying person than actually saving them.

common, give the guy a break. I know he might be able to help out once in a while but remember he might have chores of his own.

If it's any consolation the man has six grown ass kids...he was at least concerned enough to bring it to Nairaland

chii8:
Something isn't right somewhere, either you mind your business or you pray for the man....

how can someone mind his business when things are not going right?

The problem is from the wife

donbachi:
Only the kind eye my mother go look..u no go know wen u go fetch 2 drums full..unless u wan make she remind u am with garri turner.

Or the jerrycan self

Emotionss:
[color=#006600][/color]

I think the children have something the are using to blackmail their father.
Maybe he tried to sleep with one of his sons/daughters and they are using it against him.

This your synopsis says so much about your person.

CapitalHYC:
So what's your concern with that ?? Better mind your business before you are thrown out .. Na people like you no dey pay rent for two years coz you are busy minding other people's business

i hope your father is not passing through the same thing while u and brothers are playing

O P please mind your own business... Really shocked how people get to post other people's lives and start discussing... For those you commenting and saying rubbish only speak from the perspective the op gave you...mind your business

Acidosis:

Men like that are the problems of this country.

Nothing more to add.

hensben:
Maybe the man has slept with his daughters or one of them. I know a case like this and the man does everything while the children and wife look. The daughter personally told me after enough interrogation because she doesn’t call her dad, that her father molested her when she was young and in turn he is suffering from that action till date. They are now used to him doing house chores including providing for the family. The man is now a slave in his own house, he is a slave to his wife. If you see the man you will shake your head, he is dying of stress while the wife and daughter glow.

The man permitted them. Even with the so called sin, a real man can work himself back to reckoning. It is only weak men that the wife or children would even contemplate to purnish for mistakes he made. I am not in any way defending incest, it is abominable.

AFONJACOW:
forget that training... Nobody gave me any form of special training... My dad spent of his time hustling abroad when we were still small, mum take care of everything... make she send u go buy something make u no go, she go wait for u in the middle of the night to deal with u, even as that, I grown up knowing too well the background I came from, my father will warn u, u see , any time u get police case u won't see me, and he will make good of his words, oya go fight come back, u go answer ur case, so that makes me to knw the kind of friends I associate with, if nah those trouble ones, u won't see me with them because I knw my father will leave u there to bail ur self... Secondly , despite we have enough to eat, I knw from day one this life is not rosy as we see it, during holiday times we save money from errant we run for elders... I am in my late 30s comfortably happily married with 3kids , do u knw I dont have any criminal case or police case what so ever before in my entire life... Am not a church type neither a quiet person, I mingles with bad asses as well and keep late night , but am extremely careful in what I does, who go spoil go spoil , I must tell u none of my parents tell me to when do good or not do good , it's a choice

All those beating you received from your mum and all the warnings from your Dad....what could it be tagged as? if not training... The truth is you shape your children the way you want them to be..just that environment has its own impact

Jakama90:

Objection please. How do you know he is reaping the fruit of his labour. These days: you train a child and he or she will complete the training. It only takes the grace of God for children now to grow with good behaviour.

You seem to know more than the Bible; the word of God. Tell us more please.

The man loves what he is doing and he is using it as exercise. Learn to mind your business

this is not a matter of a custom or culture, it is because the man did not train his children for tomorrow.

Graxie:
It's not Idoma thing, Most Idoma men are proud men, they hardly do house chores. In fact in Agatu, it's a taboo for a man to pound. Some of their men are usually lazy so this man is exceptional. It's possible he enjoys house chores while raising idiots. Go to markurdi, most of their women will be plaiting hair, selling all manner to feed okpani while he will be busy gisting. Your landlord is different but he also failed in raising sound kids.

The bolded is also a problem but you didn't see it, right? Ego trip or what?

Acidosis:


Men like that are the problems of this country.