A lot of times, couples get pissed off with each other by the way they respond to each other. We can do better if we learn responses in the *affirmative* and not in the *combative*. Let's read the following:
1. Statement: Are you okay; is anything the matter?
- Wrong response: Can't you see yourself; what kind of question is that?
- Right response: I'm not feeling fine; I think I need some attention.
2. Statement: I got wounded in kitchen.
- Wrong response: I've told you to always be careful with knife.
- Right response: Oh sorry, let me have a look. Please be more careful with knife.
3. Statement: I'll like to eat corn flakes.
- Wrong response: No way! It's for the children; and that's for one month! Take garri if you are hungry.
- Right response: Okay, you can eat a little. I trust you'll give us money to buy another.
4. Statement: I'm really hungry.
- Wrong response: Even I myself have not eaten since morning.
- Right response: Oh sorry, let's see if there's something you can manage for now.
5. Statement: Why don't you do it this way?
- Wrong response: Why is it that you always find fault with what I do?
- Right response: Well, I've tried this before and I think it will work. If not, I'll try that.
6. Statement: I want more food.
- Wrong response: Ha-ha, it has finished. You want to finish all the food in the house?
- Right response: Sorry, please manage that for now. We are down on food stuff.
7. Statement: Handle that thing carefully please.
- Wrong response: Am I that daft? You will just be talking to me as if I don't have any sense.
- Right response: Yes dear, I will.
8. Statement: Haven't you finished what you are doing?
- Wrong response: You are seated there doing nothing and you are asking if I've not finished!
- Right response: It will still take a while; can you please lend me a hand?
9. Statement: I bought this on my way; I thought it will be useful.
- Wrong response: How much did you buy it? What! That's too expensive.
- Right response: Thank you; it will indeed be useful. Thanks for the surprise.
10. Statement :Am feeling Hot today, I will like us to make love.
Wrong Response : Ha ha, is it food. Am tired ooo.
-Right Response: Whaooo. Dear, for it to be mutual enjoyment, can you please wait till early in the morning. I'm so tired right now.
_A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Please send to your spouse and other couples, not for the purpose of condemnation, but for continuous improvement of your/their love relationship.

I always say that if anything your spouse tells you can be taken two ways and one of the ways is hurtful, assume they mean the other.

That also doesn't mean your spouse should be snarky on a regular.

A soft answer turns away wrath.

Learnt something there!

Okay..lemme save this for the future.