Why would you allow your mother in law move in with you in the 1st place... Its wrong....

Oga
Why U dey worry
Lemme be blunt with U
U can never have a happy home with that lady
Her mother will influence 90% of her decision
And U know what, she will end up like her mum
The best U can do for yourself is to brace up for the challenges of taking care of Ur kids

My dear, I think u should report missing persons to the police to cover ur behind. Looks like ur mother in law is running ur house that's why she got herself involved in ur marital issues. She supposed to know when to mind her business. If I were u, one of the terms for setting with my wife is that her mother won't live with me ever again. She can visit for a few days to see her grand children & that's where it ends. So long as u're able to take care of the house financially, her daughter can spend all her money on her mother.
I wish everything works out for u. Best of luck.

ops your first problem was allowing your mother in-law cum stay with you for a longer time!!!!
your wife was motivated through her!!!...tell your family there call them and try to sought it out amicably....but report to police first Incase anyone wants to outsmart u

BiggyB242:
God knows I won't get married to any woman I can't control. This is what you get when you a pet woman too much.

As few as the likes attached to ur comment, this is a very strong point u have raised. U, my friend are smart!

The wife doesn't love you again after meeting new persons in her OND studies that you trained her
She now feels she can do without you

Stop forcing people to love you
Be conscious of when somebody doesn't love you again and let go
Don't ever force love because you will be the looser at the end, you will always be playing second fiddle

simplexity:
I really appreciate your comments, I feel a lot better emotionally now,
I even actually agreed I cheated, and I have apologized, still she left.
Being a father makes u bear a lot and carry a lot on ur mind for peace to rain, I am not weak am just being understanding.

Thanks anyways

why is my mind telling me that you actually cheated?

simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused

maybe Ur inlaw want to turn Ur wife to money making machine

simplexity:
I really appreciate your comments, I feel a lot better emotionally now,
I even actually agreed I cheated, and I have apologized, still she left.
Being a father makes u bear a lot and carry a lot on ur mind for peace to rain, I am not weak am just being understanding.

Thanks anyways

Why must u cheat on her..you're a loose man

From my instinct those children might not be urs, your wife might have another option better than you, something is certainly wrong somewhere

My Advice
Don't manage woman and don't allow woman manage you, all relationship and marriage is base on interest.

u are a scumbag and this is a one sided story.
someone caught u flirting with a girl. explain that part before u type all this trash. u are lucky she didnt baptize u with acid in the name of satan

There is no missing persons here. Goi to her work place with police men. Seek permission of her employers and get her to produce your kids.

Ensure you engage your lawyer. He will do the necessary legal follow up to keep your kids.

You need to teach your so-called wife a lesson not to follow the steps of her mother. When she sees it tough out there, she will abandon her mother and return home to you. For now, the mother has intoxicated her with the doctrine that all men are the same.

Her return to you will humble the mother too. By then, you will be in control.

For now, you can't change her oooo.
Add some amount of prayers for direction from GOD.

hotspec:
Bros, urs is even better. we have similar issues. d mistake u made was allowing ur mother in-law to live in. my in-law rained curses on me, and my wife even arrested me with police because she wanted to go with our two daughters. mybin laws live in d same town with us. it's always from one problem to another. d same allegation mybwife gave me and mother in law called to rain curses on me without even asking me. in fact she even came to my workplace to fight. May God see u tru. I'm as confused as ure. just eat and try to sleep, then try to be around people that can play with u and lift ur spirit.

your wife arrested you? On top Wetin?

U didn't find out why her mother was a single mother before u jumped in . Arror no 1 .

I fear any man that doesn't fear woman !

simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused

first report to police encase if something get wrong where they are,so that you will be free from answering a case you don't know anything about. secondly i advice you to do DNA test to know if you're real father of the kids. she might have gone to the real father of the kids. and she's not alone in this game because she has painted your name blue and black around the area. pack-out of that environment and don't tell anyone, where your packing to except your mother. I don't see possibility of unification but if at end is possible to unit make it clear in the present of the two family that you don't need her mum around your resident and if any one object quite the marriage from there. you enter one chance and is as if God want to deliver you. If you are not a weak man sorry i use the word weak man, what give your mum's wife audacity to live with you and even insult you in your house? what give an outside power to gossip about you. yes may be you keep calm for peace to take place but when you saw that your calmness is turning to coward, why you didn't fight to gain your ground. sometimes being cool don't solve problem. don't use the kindness style to follow them if you wish to be free from their already planed humiliation. simple they want to turn you to house boy and if you accept it, don't come here to cry again. a word is enough for a wise

frozen70:


Pls don't get depressed

Hold your self because the worst has not happened

The only solution now os, go to police station and make a report that your wife left with your children after your mother in law left after visiting your family

Relax yourself and think of what to do to make yourself happier

Call the family, I mean anyone of those people that witnessed your marriage and inform them

Don't beg her to come back, you have begged enough

Live your life as if nothing happened

Rock your life and drive away depression

She will pack back to your house when she realises that what she did is silly

And if she comes back ask her to go back that you equally need a break, she will refuse and people will gather to beg you

That's the right time for her to make a verbal undertaking that her mum will only visit on your approval and she won't stay beyond 24hrs

Honestly you have to be firm and strict at the same time

She is strolling her mums line and if you don't clip her wings, you will remain a puppet

Life is too short for someone to determine your happiness

By the time she sees that you are not perturbed about her absence, she will come home with shame

And if she stays longer than necessary, another woman takes in for you, its her business not yours worst case you get a room apartment for her or she joins her mother

I support women but not the one's that won't make impact yet deprive you of your own joy

this your advice enh.... It true sha mother and daughter b taking op for a ride....

FuckTheWorld:

... My name is Stanley(not real names)...
Your name is Stanley yet not real name ...
Do you have brain at all?

why you dey vex like this? Advice him and don't destroy the poor man

[quote author=simplexity post=90918872]Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will
Who again notice say his profile no gree open ?

ogawisdom:


First mistake never never marry a girl raised by a single mother. She saw what her mother went through bc of men and u will pay for it. She was raised to hate men. Her mother hates men bc of her failed relationship with them.

Second mistake how can you apologize when u are not guilty. I kw u are guilty Sha.

Since u are guilty and have apologize then u have to go and report to whoever gave her hand in marriage to you may be he can help resolve the matter.

No need for police, your children are with their mother and they are safe. No crime that needs police involvement except u want to waste your money.

Always avoid single mothers and their children when u want a serious relationship

Bros, thanks for this statement of advice by an expert on a professional matter. You just have to work on your written skills and the correct use of punctuation marks.
Thank you and God bless you.

DontBullshitMe:
Weak men everywhere.

You are a very weak man.

A very weak excuse of a man. I'm even angry on his behalf. The guy should be invited by men and flogged 74 times.

It seems your mother in-law wants to pass on the curse on her to her daughter. What she did that made to be a single mother is nw manifesting I d life of her daughter too. You could have done back ground check on the family before going ahead to marry. Bad mothers always have negative influence on their children especially their female daughters. All the wicked wayward mothers iv come across always have one or two of their children that take after them in terms of characters.

You could have seen those sign from the family before marrying from there, but guess you're blinded by love and beauty. Your mother in-law is a very bad influence on your wife and it seems she has brainwashed your wife emotionally into believing that all men cheat, judge judging by antecedent of being a single mother .
That's why one should neverarry from a broken family because in most times it always boomerang.
Il say youvshouk find a means of divorce, and fights for the custody oF your children since they're also females so the single mother hood doesn't become a jinx or curse to yOur family.

hotspec:
Bros, urs is even better. we have similar issues. d mistake u made was allowing ur mother in-law to live in. my in-law rained curses on me, and my wife even arrested me with police because she wanted to go with our two daughters. mybin laws live in d same town with us. it's always from one problem to another. d same allegation mybwife gave me and mother in law called to rain curses on me without even asking me. in fact she even came to my workplace to fight. May God see u tru. I'm as confused as ure. just eat and try to sleep, then try to be around people that can play with u and lift ur spirit.

Ha! I am afraid of getting married. I told my mum and she was angry with me.

simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to the wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused

welp. I won't advise you to file a report to the police. why?
Your kids ain't missing, you simply had a fall out with the mother of your lovely kids.


If you're hell-bent on reporting to the police, The report must be for missing family, not abduction of your kids of any kind. they were not abducted, They are with their mums.

should you even want to end your sacred matrimony, Our courts favour WOMEN mostly though the welfare of the child is the most paramount. Do not forget you get to rent a similar apartment for her with maintenance attached. So please, think of ways to WIN her over. Remember those your tricks in her during courtship, start doing them. you shouldn't have stopped doing it in the first place? If you are, It's not working. spice it up a little, bruv.

I feel reconciling with your family is the way to go. , talk to an elder in your church or Rev.father(if you're Catholic) trust me, Your wife won't turn down any invitation from a clergyman. This matter will be laid to rest. I also feel you both though still married but LACK communication.
I feel your wife thinks you are seeing another woman hence her behaviors lately. Whatever you did or are doing. Stop it! please, for the sake of your kids. I was raised in a home almost as similar as yours. Ours started like this. It does affect the kids, very well.

NB: Believe me at your risk, I'm not married. Never been
All I wrote here are from studying my parent's Marital crisis from a young age.

Best wishes as you bring your beautiful wife and lovely kids at home again! Jisike.

1. Report to police
2. Report to elders in your family and also your wife family
3. Be prayerful.
4. Look for your wife, calm her down. Something is disturbing her seriously. There's more to it than mere eyes.
5. If she bent on divorcing you, allow her.
6. Conduct DNA test for your children.
7. Good luck to you

U made mistakes marry her .why don't you ask her why her mother is not with there father .her motherwant the same to happen to her

simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused

I still wonder why some women behave dumb, no offense. Some can be emotional bullies and also emotionally aggressive.

But I put the blame on u Mr, there are things you shouldn't accept, just as women are meant to be pampered there are also limits.
From ur story, things went sore and all u could do was begging and her and all, it's a welcomed approach that u saw wasn't working. With all ur kind gestures she kept being hostile, dat was a message u were very insensitive to, and to make matters worse, u allowed her mum to stay with you, bad move.

Based on research and experience, large number single mothers who ended up not getting married end up being bitter, every man reminds them of their "irresponsible baby daddy", they dictate to their daughters like they have seen it all.

U need to take the matter up, man up man, if she loves u she wouldn't act so insensitive, a walk the route of a single parent.
And I hope your story is true.

partners from broken home or single parent have unstable and weird tendencies most of the time. I have dated two ladies who are from broken homes from teenage years, it wasnt easy for me, if you are not patient your relationship with them wont last. they find it easy to break up.

so your wife is like that because she is from a single parent home. what can I say?

highbee02:
I'm in a similar situation, my wife even told me that I'm not the biological father of the 2 kids. The problem started when her mother came visiting when "we" had our first child. Her mother gave her a local sponge, black soap, a 5 litre liquid substance and other fetish items. Eventually, my wife was caught taking a spiritual bath right inside my sitting room.

My next wife must NOT come from Ibadan

Eyi tun gbenutan ooo

put her in prayers

put her in prayer

Your wife is cheating. She's been doing it since ND days. I bet those kids are not yours.

She cut off sex. First clue.

Don't ever call her again. Don't pick her call again. Make sure you report to the police and write statement.

Finally, get a new girl and move on.

seanwilliam:
good and in addition to this, @OP in any situation you find yourself... avoid see finish ... no matter how, avoid seee finish

what is this see finish that y'all be yapping about and how do someone avoids it