PRINCIPLES FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE (Volume 1)

Marriage comprises two persons with opposite sex coming together to live as one. Living a successful and a happy married life is not a twist of fate or magic. A successful marriage is not necessary a relationship that shows off wealth and splendor, but it is an association that has peace and understanding irrespective of their financial status. There are principles that must be adhered to for a marriage to work out.

These principles are:

1.    Their Belief[/b]: Their belief tends to portray their mindsets and their mindsets tend to portray their behaviors and their behaviors tend to portray their actions. Since they are from different background and Belief, there is bound to be conflict between them, but what is important here is their level of understanding and patience. They should be able to work out a standard for qualifying what should be acceptable or not; whether they should rely on their experience or the word of God? Don’t disregard each other Belief, but with time they will be able to work out modality to accommodate the right Belief. The Bible says in Amos 3:3 “Can two work together except they agree”.

2. Marriage is a Secret: Marriage as instituted by God is supposed to be one of the most secret relationships between couples, but many have taken it as an avenue of fairy tales and talk shows. The Bible says in Gen2:24 that “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh”. This shows that Marriage is an intimate relationship between a man and a woman without both parents’ interventions. Either of them shouldn’t present the other as a talk show before her parents or friends or vice visa. It is not everything they say in their closet that should be heard outside. They don’t necessary require both parents and friends to be their lawyers and judges all the time. All they require is God direction, but if need arises for external counselor they should be wise enough to reserve certain intimacy.

3. Avoid Unnecessary Lies: Lies at the beginning of every relationship seem to be a binding force but turn out to be a destructive element in the future. They eat up a relationship gradually as the locust eats up a plant. Trust is the foundation of every relationship, but when trust is betrayed the foundation is broken, and when the foundation of any relationship is destroyed the relationship can’t stand the test of time. It is better to tell your counterpart the true story of any even no matter what it will cost you or you may decide not to disclose anything at that time because of the intensity of the environment. It will look so shameful a first to speak the truth to an ugly situation but it will be a building block for the future. No matter how long a lie has been its still remain a lie, it will never turn a truth.

4. Have Respect for each other: Respect is defined as “giving regard or consideration to others feelings”. A man shouldn’t long to see his wife as a man neither should the wife long to see his husband as a woman. God has divinely placed everyone in the right position, and has blessed each of them with potentials. A man should have respect for his wife, being the weaker vessel. They should avoid using each other weakness as a point for laughter or jokes, instead they should encourage themselves with their abilities.

5. Mode of Correction: No man or woman is infallible like God, so sometimes someone is liable to make mistakes. Making of mistakes in marriage is not the problem but the mode of correction might even stir up strive than the error itself. Each party should accept his or her fault and correction should be done with love and not an avenue for mockery and run down. When the mode of correction is done properly, apology and forgiveness will be achieved.

6. Marriage is not a Race of Competition. Since everybody is not standing on the same point on the surface of the earth, we are bound to have variation in our perception and standard of living. So marriage is not a Race of competition but an institution for learning, correction and improvement. You don’t compare yourself with someone else in marriage rather you outdo your past. That is you find out the area in your marriage that you are not doing well and try to improve on it. No marriage is standard but the Word of God is a standard to any Successful Marriage.

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Volume 2 will soon be out……,

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