Bluntguy:
So we should clap for you for breaking his heart a second time right? You are even trying to justify your action by happily asking us if we have ever broken up with someone by text message. What impudence! You never loved him cause if you do you won't abandon him when he needed you most. Nigerian girls; fear them.

brain54:
but y would you want someone to be emotionally and psychologically attached to you nah? no offence but I think you are the problem...or maybe u didn't use the accurate word to explain...

gfon:
Yeah....first and second gilfriend. Ghosted them for weeks,wen the pressure got too much,i just dropped my text and moved on. #no time to check time

Bluntguy:
So we should clap for you for breaking his heart a second time right? You are even trying to justify your action by happily asking us if we have ever broken up with someone by text message. What impudence! You never loved him cause if you do you won't abandon him when he needed you most. Nigerian girls; fear them.

Bluntguy:
So we should clap for you for breaking his heart a second time right? You are even trying to justify your action by happily asking us if we have ever broken up with someone by text message. What impudence! You never loved him cause if you do you won't abandon him when he needed you most. Nigerian girls; fear them.

AnonymousRebec:


Maybe I didnt use the right words. But he didn't put his 100% even when I was putting mine. He was scared I'll break his heart like the first lady. I had no choice but the leave.

Karleb:


Imagine the excuse.

The guy was not emotionally attached to her?

What the fucck!

jidamsel43:
I broke up with my ex-girlfriend with nothing. I mean no text, no communication and no personal discussion. She knew my stand that I would never condone cheating in a relationship. The moment I caught her, she knew it was over. There is nothing like text or discussion or plea. I never asked for her reason and she never attempted to plead with me because she was fully aware of my stand on cheating

crackhaus:
A lack of emotional and psychological attachment, lmao... OP, you come off like someone with manipulative tendencies.
It's the first time I'm hearing that one can break up a relationship over this.

Looking back in hindsight though, it seems like your ex was quite smart afterall.
I mean it's either he gets too attached and you may break up with him, which would hurt a lot... OR he doesn't get too attached and you may still break up with him, but it won't hurt as much/at all.

I can see how the second option was the path of least resistance, and it did save him from another heartbreak in the end.

AnonymousRebec:


Well, one of my love language is being emotionally available. He couldn't give me that and I moved on. Maybe it's not a big deal for you, but it is for me.

mariahAngel:


You were even generous enough...

Me? I would've let it die a natural death!
We go ghost ourselves sotaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay none of us go know who ghost who sef

One question though: was he the same guy that kept ignoring your messages?

AnonymousRebec:


Maybe I didnt use the right words. But he didn't put his 100% even when I was putting mine. He was scared I'll break his heart like the first lady. I had no choice but the leave.

ogasharpsharp:


@ Bolded - class dismissed!

You would have done your number on him either way.

Personally, I am always wary of girls that insist on you to get so emotionally or psychologically attached to them. If he is anything like me, which I suspect he is, that would have made him even more careful, given his past experience. This whole bonding thing is an inevitability that you are supposed to let happen organically.

You don't push too hard for it, especially armed with previous information that he fed you with. It may not be your intention, but as Crackhaus surmised, it comes off as a little manipulative or trying to lay a foundation for some manipulating to go down.

In any case, you have made your decision and hopefully you are better for it. However, I can't help but feel like you still miss him, even if a little bit, hence the creation of this thread.

AnonymousRebec:
I have broken up with someone over text message because I had no other choice. (The story is below if you are interested)

So I dated this guy for about a year and the half before I brought myself to finally break up with him but I didn't have the courage to break up with him in person so I had to do it via text message.

In my life, I have dated 2 guys. With one of the guys, we both knew that long distance will not work for us, since we were both moving to different states. So we both decided to call it a day and move on peacefully. For the other guy I had to break up with him because he wasn't willing to compromise in some areas that were dear to me.

The background of this guy: The first woman he ever loved shattered his heart. She tore it into pieces. So for that reason, he has built so many walls around his heart to protect it. He was so broken to the extent that anytime he talks about her, he doesn't have nice words to say about her. He says he hates her. He has told me the story of that particular relationship and I normally tell him that maybe she is not so bad, maybe she is not the problem. I told him several times that he has to forgive her and move on. But I don't think he has forgiven her.

So now, a couple of years has passed after this heart break. It took him some time to get into another relationship because he was still healing. Then we met during a training. We became friends first, went on several outings together and eventually, we started dating. The realtionship while it lasted was a fantastic one. We always had each other's back. We always wanted and helped each other to grow and be happy. It was fantastic.

But there were some particular things he did that I didn't like. Whenever he saw he was becoming too attached emotionally to me, he will withdraw a bit. It's like he was scared to get emotionally and psychologically attached to me and I wasn't finding it funny. I asked him to improve in that aspect. I encouraged him to go for therapy if he needed one. My thought was that he was still struggling with the heart-break from the previous relationship, but nothing changed in that aspect.

Now, we didn't live in the same house but we met up very frequently. I told him so many times to improve in that area but I guess it was too much to ask. He told me he could not do that. That he doesn't want to be heart-broken a second time. It was left for me to decide if I wanted to continue or to move on. But I knew that a man being emotionally and psychologically detached from me is not what I want. Then I decided that I have to move on.

After he told me he wasn't going to change, I planned several times that whenever next we meet, I'll let him know that I couldn't accept his emotional detachment, and that I was going to move on. But I could never bring myself to tell him that in person. So many times, I decided I'll tell him in person but it never happened. I didn't have such courage. So one day, after I thought it through, I decided to send a text message explaining why I couldn't continue with the relationship and why I couldn't tell him in person. I apologised and wished him all the best in his future endeavors.

Sometimes, I wish he met me before this lady that broke his heart

Diamond23:
I think u broke up with him over nothing, as if he knew u r going to do this to him. He told u everything, u knew y he behaved as such. Frm ur explanation, he is still struggling to accept and adapt. He might sound tough nd never buh with time nd love he will loosen up

brain54:

maybe you mean 'commitment'?

ogasharpsharp:


@ Bolded - class dismissed!

You would have done your number on him either way.

Personally, I am always wary of girls that insist on you to get so emotionally or psychologically attached to them. If he is anything like me, which I suspect he is, that would have made him even more careful, given his past experience. This whole bonding thing is an inevitability that you are supposed to let happen organically.

You don't push too hard for it, especially armed with previous information that he fed you with. It may not be your intention, but as Crackhaus surmised, it comes off as a little manipulative or trying to lay a foundation for some manipulating to go down.

In any case, you have made your decision and hopefully you are better for it. However, I can't help but feel like you still miss him, even if a little bit, hence the creation of this thread.

AnonymousRebec:

I gave him 1.5 years to loosen up. Even if I continued, I was only taking a chance. He already told me he can't improve and will not make any effort to improve. I'll not stay in such a relationship.

Ishilove:
Nope, but I've been proposed to via text. The dude said his dad proposed to his mum via NIPOST.

AnonymousRebec:

He wasn't committed to being available for me emotionally. And sometimes, I felt alone even when he was around. I couldn't accept that.