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Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! - Family - Nairaland

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Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 12:09pm On Jan 27, 2021
I initially had a long distance courtship with my wife while we dated. Later she came and stayed with me for some months bc she had accommodation issues. She was based in a different State. Altogether we dated for 4 years before our eventual marriage. All through those times we never had se.x. She never allowed us to, and since I'm a Christian, I willingly left her alone since it's even against my christianity teachings. Moreover she was a virgin and I felt there was no need putting undue pressure on something that was eventually going to be all mine.
Fast- forward to today, it's been two months after our wedding, no se.x. My wife is too scared of it. Each time I make an attempt, she gets so scared of penetration that my "thing" just collapses. Forcing her would make me feel like it's rape. I have bought all kinds of gel to apply and reduce pains, but it's not working with her. She is still saying I should give her time to get used to it.
Meanwhile she is the over-jealous type. She gets angry for as flimsy a thing as me viewing WhatsApp status of female contacts on my phone or Facebook photos of female friends!
I'm already feeling I've made a huge mistake in marrying her. I never thought I'd ever cheat after marriage, but it looks like I'm being pushed into it.
What can a brother do in this situation?

13 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by JumpByte: 12:11pm On Jan 27, 2021
tongue
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by coming2america: 12:12pm On Jan 27, 2021
You don enter one chance

43 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by padi94(m): 12:17pm On Jan 27, 2021
What do you people do at night then... Sleep??

21 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by NoToPile: 12:20pm On Jan 27, 2021
https://www.nairaland.com/5727914/not-been-able-sex-yet


Diagonal read this thread above.


Its more of a mindset thing for her, this too shall pass away.

I am surprised you are talking about 'cheating' thinking you haveade a mistake etc because of her fear.

You are not the first neither will you be the last to experience this issue, it always gets sorted last last.

Be careful of advice you assmilate here, your wife will be accused, even insulted on this thread.

20 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Realtord43: 12:22pm On Jan 27, 2021
She is a liar!

She is not a virgin, she scare of you discovery that she has been lieing to you ever since.

Threaten to end the marriage and watch her confess.

79 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Optimistdude: 12:23pm On Jan 27, 2021
Bro, no time o... 2 months might turn to 2 years all of a sudden.

Ask her if she can bear children without sex or pregnancy?

1 Like

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by JumpByte: 12:25pm On Jan 27, 2021
NoToPile:
https://www.nairaland.com/5727914/not-been-able-sex-yet


Diagonal read this thread above.


Its more of a mindset thing for her, this too shall pass away.

I am surprised you are talking about 'cheating' thinking you haveade a mistake etc because of her fear.

You are not the first neither will you be the last to experience this issue, it always gets sorted last last.

Be careful of advice you assmilate here, your wife will be accused, even insulted on this thread.






Be careful of advice you assmilate here.... This is it here




Many psychopaths tend to give the worst possible counsel on this forum. I feel sorry for people who post thier issues here

14 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by neonly: 12:35pm On Jan 27, 2021
JumpByte:





Be careful of advice you assmilate here.... This is it here







Many psychopaths tend to give the worst possible counsel on this forum. I feel sorry for people who post thier issues here

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by chii8(f): 12:41pm On Jan 27, 2021
She's somehow selfish,she hasn't considered how sexually starved you might be.Two months is enough nah, doesn't she get wet?or aren't you doing the pre-intimacy well?

16 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Chummynoni(m): 12:42pm On Jan 27, 2021
So
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Freestainworld(m): 12:51pm On Jan 27, 2021
Try and touch her on the right places, take things easy with her, don't not ever talk of regrate, talk to her and see reason why you guys should do this, sweet-talk her nah.

2 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Nobody: 1:10pm On Jan 27, 2021
Diagonal:
I initially had a long distance courtship with my wife while we dated. Later she came and stayed with me for some months bc she had accommodation issues. She was based in a different State. Altogether we dated for 4 years before our eventual marriage. All through those times we never had se.x. She never allowed us to, and since I'm a Christian, I willingly left her alone since it's even against my christianity teachings. Moreover she was a virgin and I felt there was no need putting undue pressure on something that was eventually going to be all mine.
Fast- forward to today, it's been two months after our wedding, no se.x. My wife is too scared of it. Each time I make an attempt, she gets so scared of penetration that my "thing" just collapses. Forcing her would make me feel like it's rape. I have bought all kinds of gel to apply and reduce pains, but it's not working with her. She is still saying I should give her time to get used to it.
Meanwhile she is the over-jealous type. She gets angry for as flimsy a thing as me viewing WhatsApp status of female contacts on my phone or Facebook photos of female friends!
I'm already feeling I've made a huge mistake in marrying her. I never thought I'd ever cheat after marriage, but it looks like I'm being pushed into it.
What can a brother do in this situation?



First of, get her in a relaxed mood one of these days and frankly talk about sex and its pleasure. Sex is meant to be enjoyed and not endured. Try and allay her fears about hurting her. In fact, w/o you getting naked try fingering her. Do this for a considerable no of time w/o bringing out LongJohn at all - just fingering and when she gets used to it ask her if you can bring it out and let her play with it while still fingering her . The truck is to get her relax and aroused that she ll be the one asking for it.
Probably she was circumcised, just be patient with her




Greetings

11 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Jamesbally: 1:11pm On Jan 27, 2021
Your Wife was never a Virgin, She's just scared that you will soon find out, that's why She's aciting weird.

41 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Richy4(m): 1:20pm On Jan 27, 2021
I might be wrong but just maybe she's not what she claimed she is...I mean the Virgin card that she was playing....and she doesn't know how u might react if there were no traces of blood after...

But if she is, then Sit her down and talk to her... let her know that every girl married or not was scared the way she was but they overcame their fears.. tell her to let you in on what her fear was...then promise you will be gentle... get lots of pears baby oil for lubrication, u won't go wrong with that...

7 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Boston001(m): 1:22pm On Jan 27, 2021
Please admin we are tired of this fake narrative and unrealistic semantic reasoning. This does not add up to be posted. 4 years of no sex married no sex you are mad and a dead brain get a life.

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Liposure: 1:24pm On Jan 27, 2021
Or was she circumcised as a child? because i don't understand.
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 2:01pm On Jan 27, 2021
Freestainworld:
Try and touch her on the right places, take things easy with her, don't not ever talk of regrate, talk to her and see reason why you guys should do this, sweet-talk her nah.
I've done all that. Infact, I noticed she has become comfortable with me touching her and then we do other things then we "cum". Anything but penetration. But I'm no longer comfortable with that because it's all mere masturbation. What I need is the real thing!

4 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 2:06pm On Jan 27, 2021
Liposure:
Or was she circumcised as a child? because i don't understand.
I've asked her that, but she said no.
I even asked if she was at anytime sexually abused. It's nay!
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Denique(f): 2:09pm On Jan 27, 2021
You should try going down there and watch her beg you for it. It works, trust me! wink

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 2:17pm On Jan 27, 2021
Richy4:
I might be wrong but just maybe she's not what she claimed she is...I mean the Virgin card that she was playing....and she doesn't know how u might react if there were no traces of blood after...

But if she is, then Sit her down and talk to her... let her know that every girl married or not was scared the way she was but they overcame their fears.. tell her to let you in on what her fear was...then promise you will be gentle... get lots of pears baby oil for lubrication, u won't go wrong with that...
I've tried all these. I have even thought to myself if she lied about the virginity thing and is trying to hide. But then, I was never interested in the virgin or no virgin thing and I told her that from the onset; that I don't care if any woman is a virgin or not. I already told her my marriage intentions before she ever mentioned her status.
Again, I don't think she's hiding anything. She is just scared of penetration.
How I got to know she was a virgin then was one time when she had an infection from a hostel toilet. The pharmacist gave her a certain stuff to insert into her privates as part of the treatment, but she refused to do it. It was when I pressed to know why she wouldn't do it that she opened up that she was a virgin and nothing had ever entered there!
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 2:18pm On Jan 27, 2021
Denique:
You should try going down there and watch her beg you for it. It works, trust me! wink
She doesn't like "heading".
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Karleb(m): 2:38pm On Jan 27, 2021
Diagonal:

I've tried all these. I have even thought to myself if she lied about the virginity thing and is trying to hide. But then, I was never interested in the virgin or no virgin thing and I told her that from the onset; that I don't care if any woman is a virgin or not. I already told her my marriage intentions before she ever mentioned her status.
Again, I don't think she's hiding anything. She is just scared of penetration.
How I got to know she was a virgin then was one time when she had an infection from a hostel toilet. The pharmacist gave her a certain stuff to insert into her privates as part of the treatment, but she refused to do it. It was when I pressed to know why she wouldn't do it that she opened up that she was a virgin and nothing had ever entered there!

Bros no vex o, so she no dey even open the thing for you make you see?

Nawa o!

5 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Denique(f): 2:50pm On Jan 27, 2021
Diagonal:

She doesn't like "heading".

What then is the problem? What is she afraid of?
You two have needs to be met by each other and if one party isn't budging, then you should arrange for a therapy session for you two.
I know it's quite challenging but I hope you two get through it together.

4 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by meobizy(f): 2:52pm On Jan 27, 2021
I have no time for made up stories today. Let ignorant Nairalanders waste their time instead.

3 Likes

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Kharol1234: 3:45pm On Jan 27, 2021
Elders wetin who na get to talk for this matter
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by 99thEnemy(m): 3:59pm On Jan 27, 2021
Denique:
You should try going down there and watch her beg you for it. It works, trust me! wink
grin

1 Like

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Pochettino(f): 4:07pm On Jan 27, 2021
Denique:
You should try going down there and watch her beg you for it. It works, trust me! wink

I don't advise this because we women can stink so badly down there

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Nobody: 4:17pm On Jan 27, 2021
I have noticed something about ladies who are virgin, they are extremely jealous and stubborn.

1 Like

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 4:18pm On Jan 27, 2021
meobizy:
I have no time for made up stories today. Let ignorant Nairalanders waste their time instead.
It is not a made-up story, Sis.
Not as if it really matters what you think. But I'm sharing my own experience.
Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by beehivedata(m): 4:18pm On Jan 27, 2021
My brother. Just be patient with her. What you find out when u eventually sleep with her will decide what the next step is to take. For now, you're already in the marriage and would have to cope with what it throws at you. Just be a good man and keep trying.

1 Like

Re: Two Months After Wedding, No Sex. Help! by Diagonal: 4:19pm On Jan 27, 2021
BiggyB242:
I have noticed something about ladies who are virgin, they are extremely jealous and stubborn.
She is extremely jealous!

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