Hello Nairalanders am a 31 years old ladies am a mum of 2 but my baby daddy took away my children since we separated since 2014 now I heard he is using the girl which is just 11 years old as a maid to his new wife they reside in onitsha. I want to know if there is any organization that can make him pay child support and the kids will be under my custody. Please I really need help

strategize with your family on ways to get your daughter without his knowledge

Long stories short, send a message, and I will link you to some officers who'd help you.

thanks but I want him to pay child support If i took them just like that he will feel less concerned and I can’t train 2 children all by my self now

Suresoniaabia:
thanks but I want him to pay child support If i took them just like that he will feel less concerned and I can’t train 2 children all by my self now

Then leave her where she is! See it as training for her. It will make her strong.

P.s. I do understand how you feel as a mother.

Suresoniaabia:
thanks but I want him to pay child support If i took them just like that he will feel less concerned and I can’t train 2 children all by my self now

If I don't say this I won't rest... madam you're beautiful...

budaatum:

Then leave her where she is! See it as training for her. It will make her strong.

P.s. I do understand how you feel as a mother.

What manner of advice is this? When did maltreatment become "training" and a means to make the young defenceless child "strong"? No wonder our society is becoming even more dangerous for the young ones where we subject these children to all manner of evil all in the name "training" I can see just how well you understand what she's passing through, mtseeew

@Op, pls contact some government agencies in charge of Children & Vulnerable People in Anambra State. I'm sure you can get their contacts online. Make sure you follow up asap.

Suresoniaabia:
Hello Nairalanders am a 31 years old ladies am a mum of 2 but my baby daddy took away my children since we separated since 2014 now I heard he is using the girl which is just 11 years old as a maid to his new wife they reside in onitsha. I want to know if there is any organization that can make him pay child support and the kids will be under my custody. Please I really need help

You heard? Who is your source? Why aren't you seeing your kids often? Why don't they spend holidays or weekends with you? Maybe your source is a bad belle, also your kids could be maltreated by their father's wife. The best way to be sure is to interact with them. I hope I'm wrong that you've been distant otherwise they wouldn't really open up to you. I mean, 6+ years is a long time.

Uniquewise:


What manner of advice is this? When did maltreatment become "training" and a means to make the young defenceless child "strong"? No wonder our society is becoming even more dangerous for the young ones where we subject our children to all manner of evil all in the name "training" I can see just how well you understand what she's passing through, mtseeew

@Op, pls contact some government agencies in charge of Children & Vulnerable People in Anambra State. I'm sure you can get their contacts online. Make sure you follow up asap.

Please go and read what I responded to carefully.

She asked for charity organisations that would help her get her kids, which is wise. Then she's asking her baby father to give her her daughter and on top pay child support, which is unrealistic since he is already maltreating her and does not seem to care.

Do know that my own upbringing was much more brutal, and the experience has made me very very strong.

budaatum:

Please go and read what I responded to carefully.

She asked for charity organisations that would help her get her kids, which is wise. Then she's asking her baby father to give her her daughter and on top pay child support, which is unrealistic since he is already maltreating her and does not seem to care.

Do know that my own upbringing was much more brutal, and the experience has made me very very strong.

.

Pls don't use your experience to give advice next time; it could be dangerous. Not in these days where we see children being kidnapped, killed and maimed practically everyday, some over flimsy excuses. That you were brutalised as a child should not make you see it as a standard of training for the young and defenceless, much less what will make them "strong". And to be sure, you probably need therapy, to help you get over those years of abuse, which unfortunately, you have learnt to normalise. Meaning...you will also brutalise your own children, and call it training.

Seriously, I think you need therapy yourself. Abused people will ALWAYS end up abusing others.
Your post shows a mindset that is unhealthy and dangerous.

Do know that I never asked for your advise nor opinion nor did I give you any.

Op would be ill-advised to expect her useless baby father who has already shown that he does not care to then pay support for a child he already maltreats. She should take her daughter and feed her the little she has instead of expecting him to pay child support, or sue him for it.

She has the choice of ignoring me if she wants to, as do you too, instead of misconstruing what I've said with insults like a person abused as a child!

Uniquewise:
.

Pls don't use your ......

budaatum:
Do know that I never asked for your advise nor opinion nor did I give you any.

Op would be ill-advised to expect her useless baby father who has already shown that he does not care to then pay support for a child he already maltreats. She should take her daughter and feed her the little she has instead of expecting him to pay child support, or sue him for it.

She has the choice of ignoring me if she wants to, as do you too, instead of misconstruing what I've said with insults like a person abused as a child!

You never asked for my advice, Yes,..but you posted a very very dangerous advice for everyone to see, therefore, anyone can reply, and that, you can't stop.

Between you and I, the only abused person is you, which you already testified to, shikena. If you like, seek help, or Not, na you sabi. Sha nor go kill your children with maltreatment all in the name of "training them to become strong" Don't destroy your children, biko.

Good thing is my post was not for you so your inability to understand it is pointless. Op will hopefully stop trying to have her cake and eat it and care for her daughter with the little she may have instead of leaving her daughter with her abusive father just because he refuses to pay child support.

As for my children. They are probably older than you and are doing very well, but thank you for your concern for them. It is the ignorant who repeat the cycle of abuse. The wise learn from their own experience and do all it takes so their children do not have to go through what one did.

Uniquewise:


You never asked for my advice, Yes,..but you posted ......

chatinent:
Long stories short, send a message, and I will link you to some officers who'd help you.

okay

budaatum:
Good thing is my post was not for you so your inability to understand it is pointless. Op will hopefully stop trying to have her cake and eat it and care for her daughter with the little she may have instead of leaving her daughter with her abusive father just because he refuses to pay child support.

As for my children. They are probably older than you and are doing very well, but thank you for your concern for them. It is the ignorant who repeat the cycle of abuse. The wise learn from their own experience and do all it takes so their children do not have to go through what one did.

You are really confused young man. You obviously haven't learnt from your own abusive background, hence why you see nothing wrong in offering a jaundiced advice to another on the www.
Anyway, it is to be expected; Nairaland is a place where teenagers can register and post thrash under anonymity.
Good morning son. Make sure you keep out of trouble henceforth, ok?

Simple question, una don begin dey figh

budaatum:

Then leave her where she is! See it as training for her. It will make her strong.

P.s. I do understand how you feel as a mother.

U go stop to dey comment.
U never notice say people dey always think say u dey ment when u drop advice?
No be by force to comment.

*Moral of The Story*
"Girls Make una close una legs oh"

lilvicky68:

If I don't say this I won't rest... madam you're beautiful...

thanks

Inspiration007:
Simple question, una don begin dey figh

we married traditionally

Hammyaladin:
*Moral of The Story*

"Girls Make una close una legs oh"

i hear but it happened long time ago I was still a teenager then

Suresoniaabia:
okay

i really want to but how

If you are sure there is any form of maltreatment truly, Go to child welfare office in your state and report him there, they will invite the two of you with representative from your families, they will help you reach an agreement on whatever he will be dropping monthly for the kids while they in your custody.

It is however important for you to have something worth doing for yourself, you can't depend on your baby papa for long, it is not every man that is responsible therefore you have to take responsibility for yourself.

Suresoniaabia:
i hear but it happened long time ago I was still a teenager then

So sorry! What age?

Hammyaladin:
So sorry! What age?

i was just 19 when I met him

Vyolet:
If you are sure there is any form of maltreatment truly, Go to child welfare office in your state and report him there, they will invite the two of you with representative from your families, they will help you reach an agreement on whatever he will be dropping monthly for the kids while they in your custody.

It is however important for you to have something worth doing for yourself, you can't depend on your baby papa for long, it is not every man that is responsible therefore you have to take responsibility for yourself.

thanks for your advice I will ask questions and know their location

Suresoniaabia:
i was just 19 when I met him

Shit! That's quite sad!!
The only way you can win any case against him is to first be financially okay to some extent! if not, we know justice doesn't exist in our country!!

Suresoniaabia:
Hello Nairalanders am a 31 years old ladies am a mum of 2 but my baby daddy took away my children since we separated since 2014 now I heard he is using the girl which is just 11 years old as a maid to his new wife they reside in onitsha. I want to know if there is any organization that can make him pay child support and the kids will be under my custody. Please I really need help

Have you checked on your kids since the time he took them away?
Do you communicate directly with them?

mariahAngel:


Have you checked on your kids since the time he took them away?
Do you communicate directly with them?

he hid them from me I search everywhere I cried I beg his mum they said i won’t see them till 2018 someone told me they are with there grand mum that was when I start visiting them

Suresoniaabia:
he hid them from me I search everywhere I cried I beg his mum they said i won’t see them till 2018 someone told me they are with there grand mum that was when I start visiting them

Chai!

Only a very wicked man will deprive his own children of their mother, when she's still alive.

Never stop fighting for your children. That alone will assure them of your love for them.
May God continue to strengthen you.

Uniquewise:


You are really confused young man. ..

I am not your young man nor am I your son.

If you were a mother like op, you would get my point in responding to her silly request for child support from her irresponsible baby father as I did.

budaatum:
Do know that I never asked for your advise nor opinion nor did I give you any.

Op would be ill-advised to expect her useless baby father who has already shown that he does not care to then pay support for a child he already maltreats. She should take her daughter and feed her the little she has instead of expecting him to pay child support, or sue him for it.

She has the choice of ignoring me if she wants to, as do you too, instead of misconstruing what I've said with insults like a person abused as a child!

GayPontiff:

U go stop to dey comment.
U never notice say people dey always think say u dey ment when u drop advice?
No be by force to comment.

Are you too missing the sarcastic response to ops silly demand for child support from her irresponsible baby father?

I can assure you the op did not miss it and wants her kids despite being poor. At least I hope she does since her kids will be better off with poor her than their abusive father.

Please, think one is "ment" if you wish. It at least shows you use your brain which is precisely the point.