gfelo:
Never give the custody to their mum, Reasons:
(1) if she is that bad she will influence them negatively.
(2) she will turn them to hate u.
(3) mentioning loneliness in ur write up, the kid will serve as point of contact and make u guys fall back together, u wudnt want to go back to ur vomit i guess.
(4) it will delay the process of ur healing if u will heal at all.
thank u

KnowledgeIsVast:
You and your wife no de tire at all?😩🤣

Richy4:
🖐️🤚🖐️🤚🖐️🖐️🤚
I have a question.. When you said that you have a mother and a sister that can take care of them, what do you mean?
Is it sending them (the kids) to go and leave with your mother and sister or that they (your
mum & Sister) are coming to stay where you all will be together?

Mindlog:
It should be shared custody as they should spend their time between you and their mother, have that discussion with her no matter how difficult it may seem as you both have to work out how to co-parent with less acrimony.

If custody issue is taken to court, she may likely be granted custody considering their ages and you given visitation rights, with them spending some of their school holidays with you unless you can prove to the judge that she abuses substances or clinically assessed to be mentally unstable which would be a risk, leaving the children with her.

When it comes to care for the girls, she comes first before your mother and sister.

Afodot0022:
Thanks for this piece of advice. Really appreciate. Thank God i have a job and can take care of them with the help of my mom. My wife has proven she is not worth it and as u said, she might poison there mind towards me. Thanks once again.

Afodot0022:
Yes i understand you better, she have the higher chances taken custody because of their age and also female. Just dont want anything that will make me relate with her which i know its impossible cos of the kids. Seeing her brings back the hurt in me and reason am trying to avoid her. She came yesterday to see them kids and honestly i wasnt happy seeing her cos it triggers what she did to me and how she hurt me. I just dont want to set an eye on her for now so i can be fine and heal and back emotionally. Me seeing her drains me emotionally. Honestly divorce is not easy and has its own issues. Atimes itss even worst than the marriage itself.

ahnie:

You see why I don't like you, you're easily manipulated.
You don't think with your head,you take decisions irrationally just like that.


Whatever nonsense you n your wife are doing,do not forget there re kids looking up to you boths.

Take your marital issues outta nairaland
They would use it against you tomorrow,most peeps here are kids.

Mindlog:


I understand where you are coming from as you are dealing with the loss of a marriage and her presence naturally triggers you and that is why people going through a divorce are encouraged to seek therapy as it helps in some form of desensitization, to help the person pour out their heart and gradually become less triggered by the other person's presence as they begin to achieve clarity about the ended marriage and what lies ahead.

Beremx:
Your case is almost similar to that of Korra Obidi who's stupid husband is trying to separate her daughters from her. In your case, it doesn't involve going to court. I will advise you have a shared custody with your wife because the kids are still too young not to be close to their mum.

Afodot0022:
Yes either of them or both will come and stay with me. Mum is retired and not working while sister is yet to be married. I feel if they are living with us, it will help the most in taking care of them being that they are female and knows better.

Mohammed Qahtami from Saudi Arabia, who was adjudged the World Champion in public speaking at the annual contest conducted by Toastmasters International. Award winning speech "Words Kills".
❤️LESSON/TAKEAWAYS:-
👉Words can definitely have a powerful deep impact & cause harm if used wrongly/destructively, both emotionally & mentally to others.
👉Once words are spoken, it can be difficult to take them back. 👉Wounds inflicted by words can never heal, whilst physical wound by fire will also heal, as said in ancient #Thirukkural..
👉Note the effects of bad language can linger long after the words have been spoken for long time until he dies.
👉It's important to choose our words carefully & consider the impact they may have on others.

👉On the other hand, #PositiveWords/ #ConstructiveComments #PepTalks can also have a #PowerfulImpact & #HelpBuildOthersUp, making it equally important to use #KindSupportiveLanguage.

❤️As Parents:-
👉If we are Parent ensure we motivate & encourage our kids whenever & wherever possible, Not to always compare them with others & degrade them every now & then,
👉Once our bad words inflicts the teenage or grown up kids mentally/emotionally, it cannot be taken back, they might get aloof & spoilt, could be like death story narrated by the Speaker🙏

❤️CORPORATE CONTEXT:-
👉In a corporate we must be careful once words wrongly uttered could ruin/end our career also.
👉So before responding an email or speak bad don't do it in full rage when we are NOT that stable as it could backfire on us only. 👉If possible, put the email in draft & think over it & moderate and release it if it really had to communicated out..

Folks, Enjoy Have A Wonderful Week

Afodot0022:
Yes i understand you better, she have the higher chances taken custody because of their age and also female. Just dont want anything that will make me relate with her which i know its impossible cos of the kids. Seeing her brings back the hurt in me and reason am trying to avoid her. She came yesterday to see them kids and honestly i wasnt happy seeing her cos it triggers what she did to me and how she hurt me. I just dont want to set an eye on her for now so i can be fine and heal and back emotionally. Me seeing her drains me emotionally. Honestly divorce is not easy and has its own issues. Atimes itss even worst than the marriage itself.

Justbehave:
Bros pls take custody of your kids. You are even lucky to have a mother and a sister helping you out. In my own case I don't. So I employed two nannies because I'm with my three kids though all boys. One works from 8 am to 5pm while the other starts from 5pm to 8am.Their mums don't dare visit them. No time for nonsense.

ahnie:

You must be a dictator

Justbehave:
I'm not. But when it comes to women and their manipulative attitude,I can handle them very well. Besides my kids are happy staying with me to the extent they don't even remember their mums.